14. Hannah

FOURTEEN

Heat crawls up my neck, and I busy myself looking at the menu.

Just chill, Hannah. Take a breath. And chill.

I was bound to see Maddox again. He's the owner of the company, and if today is any indication, he'll be at the office. Maybe not every day, since he wasn't in yesterday, but I gotta learn how to be normal around him.

I take another breath and make my eyes focus on the words in front of me.

It's fine.

This is all fine.

And if it becomes completely miserable seeing Maddox all the time, I can find a new job.

"And for you?" The friendly voice pulls my attention up, and I find the server at my side, beverages already set out on the table.

"Sorry," I apologize. The server has her little notepad in her hand, so I assume she's taking meal orders. "I'll have the…" I look down at the menu and read off the first thing I see. "The chicken Caesar wrap, please."

"Good choice. That's my favorite."

Her smile draws out my own, and I hand her my menu.

"And you?" She turns to Maddox.

His menu is already closed because, obviously, he's been paying attention. And while he hands it to the server, I lift my glass of Dr Pepper and take a sip.

"I'd like the ham and cheese sandwich, please," Maddox asks politely.

It takes me a second.

Just a second for it all to come crashing back.

And with the understanding comes the emotions.

Every emotion I've been trying to lock down since I heard his name on Wednesday. All the hurt and anger and betrayal that have been festering inside me for fifteen years. All of it snaps back into place like it never left.

My mouth is still full of Dr Pepper, and when I try to swallow it, my throat seizes.

I manage to get it down, but some of the bubbles hit wrong, making me cough.

I cough again, my eyes stinging as I set my cup down.

At my side, Brandon turns toward me. "Jeez, Hannah." He half laughs. "First time drinking?"

He lifts a hand like he's going to pat my back, but I don't want him touching me.

"Fine," I choke out, even as I fight not to burst into tears.

Why is Maddox toying with me like this? Is it not enough that he pretended like I didn't exist when I was at my most vulnerable? Can't he just keep doing that? Keep pretending our stupid fucking week together never happened?

"Hannah?" Maddox's voice is deeper than Brandon's, and it holds no humor.

"I'm fine," I repeat, not making eye contact with either of them.

I don't want anyone helping me. I don't need anyone to help me.

"Hate when it goes down the wrong pipe." Brandon chuckles at my side.

I clear my throat as gently as possible, needing the attention to move away from me. And thankfully Brandon turns back to his previous conversation.

I touch my fingers to the corners of my eyes.

Hold it together.

"Hannah." Maddox says my name quieter this time.

"I'll be right back," I say as I slip out of my chair.

I spotted the sign for the restrooms on the walk to the table, so I make a beeline for them now.

A tear drips from the corner of my eye.

Then a second follows.

I press my hand flat against the ladies' room door and push it open.

A woman is at the sink, but I keep my face tipped down and walk to the farthest stall so I can have my mental breakdown in private.