Chapter 14: Josie

Chapter Fourteen

JOSIE

I think Mick ruined me. I huff, rolling over in bed for what feels like the hundredth time. It doesn’t help, though; sleep is still evading me. My blanket is wrapped around me, but I’m still cold. Okay, maybe cold isn’t the right word.

I just miss having Mick’s warm body close to me. I hadn’t slept that nicely in ages. Why did they have to have stupid double beds? Right when I was thinking I could allow myself to give in to what I really wanted from Mick.

I was hoping we could have a wild weekend before we parted ways. It would be a final goodbye, and I wouldn't spend the rest of my life wondering what it would be like if he kissed me. To feel his rough hands all over my body.

Because I know that at the end of all of this, I will have to fully break away from him. There is no way my heart will survive this. I can’t be his friend. I don’t have it in me, and maybe that makes me a total bitch, but the world has fucked with my heart enough. I have to protect what’s left of it.

I roll over again, hoping to find my phone. Maybe I could read a book or something to make me tired. “You all right?” Mick asks into the darkness. His deep voice doesn’t help my situation.

“Yeah, just restless, I guess.” I turn to face him, even though I can't see his face clearly. There is only a soft light coming from a digital clock that projects onto the ceiling. “You?”

“Guess I’m the same.” The room falls quiet again.

“Talk to me,” I whisper, wanting to hear him.

“All right, let’s play a game,” he suggests.

“Do not say truth or dare.”

“Scared?” he teases, making me laugh.

“More like lazy,” I lie. I really just want to lie here with him.

“All right, how about just the truth?”

“We just ask each other questions?” That might be interesting.

“Yeah, you've been keeping secrets from me.”

“Not secrets, really.”

“Call it whatever you want. Either way, I don’t fucking like it.” I love that he wants to know everything about me. I wish I could let him in. I guess I am scared.

“All right, I'll go first.”

“Have at it. I’m an open book.”

“You really haven't been messing around with the Vegas girls?” I ask, allowing my curiosity to get the best of me. Okay, maybe it’s actually my jealousy asking, but who’s keeping track?

“Fuck, Josie.” I cringe at the hint of anger in his voice.

“What? You don’t want to answer it?” I guess that’s all the answer I need. A nonanswer tells me all I need to know.

“No, that’s not it at all. It’s that I’ve already said before. Do you think I’m lying to you?” This time he doesn’t sound angry but upset.

Ouch. Shit. He’s right. “Sorry, I guess I thought you were being a gentleman and not kissing and telling.” I have to admit that even though I may have hurt his feelings a bit, I’m doing a happy dance on the inside that he hasn’t been with any girls here.

“I’ll always be straight with you, Josie. Now ask another question because I’m not counting that bullshit one.” I can’t help but smile.

“Why not?”

“It’s against Pedro’s rules. No girls.” Oh, right. That makes sense. My internal celebration comes to a halt. “Not that I have any interest.”

“Really?” I blurt out, hoping I don’t sound too excited.

“None,” he says without a thought. I never saw Mick be into a girl back in school.

“What about guys?” I ask, just to make sure I’m covering all my bases.

“Isn’t it my turn?”

“Fine.” I let out a playful huff.

“And I think it was pretty clear when you were in my lap, I was hard, Josie, and you’re far from looking like a man.” He says it with appreciation is his tone. Is he implying that he thinks I have a good body?

“All right,” I say, conceding, thankful for the darkness to hide my blush. I’m so lame. “It's your turn.”

“What’s the real reason you can’t sleep?” Well, shit. How do I answer that? “You still worried about the stalker?” He goes on in my silence. I don’t want to lie to him. Not after him saying he’d never do that.

“I actually kind of forgot about that.” Which is insane. “I guess I feel safe when I’m with you, and it slipped my mind.”

“Damn, Jojo. You have no idea how good that makes me feel. That I can give you that.” Sincerity bleeds through his words. “Now tell me why you can’t sleep, then.”

“It was nice cuddling with you. I guess I miss—” I’m cut off when a body lands on the bed next to me. I burst into laughter. “How did you move that fast? Jesus,” I say through giggles.

“How many times did you wrap yourself in the blanket?” Mick untangles me from the blanket to pull it over both of us. We both roll to our sides so we’re facing each other. Damn, we’re close. I let one of my legs drift over to press against his. He throws an arm over me, getting comfortable. “Your turn.”

“Did you want me to come stay with you in Vegas because you felt it’s the right thing to do or because you really want me there?”

He keeps dangling that carrot in front of me. Now is the time for me to find out the real reason he wants me there. So many times I wanted to agree, but my head stopped me while the rest of my body rebelled, wanting to take him up on it. If he really had a no girls rule, I could do it. I’m playing with fire.

“I want you, Josie.”

“You want me?” I force a playful laugh. He lets out a deep breath.

“I want you to come stay with me.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Fuck yes. I’ll take it.” I can hear the smile in his voice.

I suck in a breath. Is he going to ask me about my sex life since I badgered him about his? The whole of my sex life is thinking about him while I’m masturbating. Beyond that, there isn’t much. In fact, there is nothing.

I’ve never even been kissed. Hopefully that will change very soon.