39. Gage

39

GAGE

G age checked both sides of the tractor as he slowly drove it beneath the shade of the pole barn. Mr. Benson stood next to another tractor with his elbow propped on the side. A toolbox was open beside him as he waved Gage over.

After parking the tractor and shutting it off, Gage climbed off and headed over to help Mr. Benson. "What's up?"

Mr. Benson waved him off. "Oh not much. I think I have this fixed up. Actually, I want to talk to you about something."

Gage's jaw tightened. It was an instinct from his old life that still reared its ugly head every once in a while. "Is everything okay?"

Mr. Benson wiped his brow with his arm. His cowboy hat hung from a hook on the wall nearby. "I guess it is. First, I want to ask how you're doing."

Gage took a second to take stock before answering. It had been a few weeks since Rome took Hadley. She was finally starting to get around on her own without wincing in pain. The season was open at Wolf Creek, and she insisted on working every minute she felt able. The ranch was gearing up for its biggest year yet.

Gage had gotten word that the police investigation into Rome's death had been closed. Gage's actions had been ruled self-defense.

Thankfully, Gage hadn't lost his job with Beau, and Mr. Benson had been calling more often with jobs around the ranch.

Gage leaned an arm against the tractor Mr. Benson had been working on. "Yeah, everything is fine."

Mr. Benson tilted his head. "I'm asking about you . Are you okay? I know you had a tough time after what happened to Hadley."

Oh. That.

Gage scratched the back of his head. "Actually, I'm going to keep my answer. It's helped that you've been calling me more. Things are better when I'm working. Aside from that, Mr. Chambers has been talking me through it."

"That's good. He knows what he's talking about. How are you feeling about your relationship with God?"

Gage rubbed his jaw. "Pretty good. I'm starting to believe in forgiveness."

Mr. Benson grinned. "Good." He shifted his weight from one side to the other. "Did I ever tell you about the time I killed someone?"

Narrowing his eyes, Gage studied Mr. Benson, looking for any sign of joking. "No, I don't think you did."

He most definitely hadn't. That was something Gage would've remembered.

Mr. Benson looked at the ground before lifting his chin again. "It was a long time ago. This ranch has been in my family for generations. It passed to me when my dad died. That was ten years ago."

"But you just moved to Silver Falls three years ago," Gage pointed out.

"I grew up here, but I couldn't stay here." Mr. Benson chuckled as if leaving his home was amusing. "Tammy and I were high school sweethearts, but we just got married three years ago. Right around the time I moved back here."

Gage hadn't thought much about Mr. Benson's relationship with his wife. Even if he had, he wouldn't have asked. It was easy to assume they'd been together for decades. They had an ease around each other that made their relationship feel timeless .

"I hit someone who was walking on the road. A pedestrian. I was just a kid. Barely eighteen. It was dark–pitch black—and I didn't see her until it was too late."

Gage's gut churned. If Mr. Benson had survived half the thoughts that had tormented Gage over the last few weeks, he was truly sorry for the man.

"I'm sorry. I had no idea."

Mr. Benson shrugged one shoulder. "I don't talk about it a lot for obvious reasons. Apparently, the woman had a fight with her boyfriend and just walked out. She had a cocktail of drugs and alcohol in her system at the time, and even though the investigations confirmed I wasn't guilty, I sure felt like I was."

Gage shook his head as the familiar unease curled and clawed in his gut. "I had no idea."

"Everyone I knew turned their backs on me. My parents hated me. Tammy deserved better. None of my old friends wanted to be associated with me. So, I left town as soon as I graduated from high school. I didn't tell anybody where I was going, and I wandered around for thirty years. I didn't know it, but I was lost."

"You left Tammy?" Gage asked.

Mr. Benson nodded. "That was probably a mistake. She sure held a grudge, and I don't blame her. So, when I finally found the Lord and got my head on straight, I came back to find her. "

"What if she'd been married?" Gage asked.

"She was for a while, but her first husband died about eight years ago. That didn't mean she let me waltz right back into her life. No, she made me do a lot of work, and not for her, but for myself."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I had found God, and I thought I had put the past behind me, but I hadn't really let go of the guilt. She said as long as I kept acting like the Lord couldn't forgive me, I wasn't truly trusting Him. He can do anything, and forgiving me for a mistake I made was well within His power. Why hadn't I realized that yet?"

Gage scratched his bearded cheek. "I guess you're saying I've been doing the same thing?"

"No, actually, I'm saying you've handled things better than I did. I'm proud of you, and I want you to know that I think you're a good man."

Dang. And Gage hadn't planned on getting choked up today. Friendships hit differently when there was plenty of respect and trust in the foundation. "I appreciate that. And for what it's worth, I think you're a good man too."

Mr. Benson crossed his arms over his chest. "So, I have to ask. What are your plans?"

"Um, my plans for what?" Gage asked.

"For the future. You still like working at Beau's?"

"Yeah. I love it."

Mr. Benson looked out over the ranch. Spring was making its presence known, and the hills were a splash of green beneath a clear blue sky. "I've been trying to run things around here on my own for a while. Sure, I've hired you and Travis for odd jobs here and there, but I can't do this without more help. I'd like to offer you a more permanent job here. I know you're happy at Beau's, but maybe we can get you on a part-time schedule here too. Summer is coming, and I'll need all the help I can get with the cattle."

Gage stared at his friend as his heart hammered in his chest. "I was actually going to ask you for more hours. Hadley is working more now that the ranch is open for the season. I can't let her outwork me."

Mr. Benson let out a hearty laugh. "No, I don't think you should."

The Lord had a nice way of showing His hand. Just when Gage needed more work, the opportunity fell right into his lap.

"You can take some time to think about it," Mr. Benson said.

"My gut says yes, but I do want to run it by Hadley first."

Mr. Benson's mouth lifted on one side. "Smart man. That's one thing they don't tell you about being in a relationship. It doesn't work unless it's a true partnership."

"To tell you the truth, that's something I learned from you. My parents definitely didn't tell each other everything, but I see you and Mrs. Benson do it all the time. It's easy to decide what's right and wrong."

"I'm glad to hear that. It's not always smooth sailing, but life is much better with a good woman by my side."

Gage nodded. "I believe you."

"By the way, I appreciate you always being respectful and calling me Mr. Benson, but I think we're past formalities now. I'm only fifty-one."

"Matthew it is then."

Matthew stuck out his hand. "Let me know what you decide."

"I will." Gage shook his hand then looked at his watch. "I actually need to go meet Hadley now."

Matthew shooed him off. "Go on. I'll take it from here."

Gage turned on his heels and set a path for Wolf Creek. He'd have more than one surprise for Hadley tonight, and he couldn't wait to see her.