8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Martin

I lie sprawled across Jesse's chest, our bodies still tangled together, a thin sheen of sweat cooling on our skin. My fingers trace lazy patterns through the light dusting of hair on his chest, and the steady thump of his heartbeat beneath my palm is comforting.

"That was…" I trail off, unable to find the right words.

He chuckles, the sound rumbling through his chest. "Yeah, it was."

I tilt my head up to look at him, drinking in the sight of his flushed cheeks and tousled hair. His eyes are closed, a contented smile playing on his lips. He looks utterly relaxed.

"You're gorgeous like this," I murmur before I can stop myself.

His eyes flutter open, and he gazes at me with such warmth it makes my breath catch. "Look who's talking," he says, running his fingers through my hair.

I hum contentedly, nuzzling into his touch. We fall into a comfortable silence, just basking in each other's presence. It's been so long since I've felt this… peaceful. This connected to another person.

Suddenly, the silence is broken when my stomach lets out an embarrassingly loud growl. Jesse's body shakes with laughter beneath me.

"Hungry?" he teases, poking my side playfully.

I arch an eyebrow at him. "I'm a growing boy, you know. And, if you recall, we missed dinner."

"Mmm." He smiles. "Should I apologize for distracting you?"

I snort a laugh. "I suppose I'll let it go this time. But if you don't get some food into me right quick, I'm going to have to eat you." I lean up and suck his earlobe into my mouth, tickling it with my tongue before biting down on it playfully.

"Eep!" He jumps, letting out a most unmanly but totally adorable squeak. "Let's get some food in you before you start gnawing on the furniture or resorting to cannibalism."

Jesse orders room service, and soon, we're arranged on the bed with a smorgasbord of delicious finger foods spread out in front of us like a picnic.

We eat in comfortable silence for a while, occasionally stealing bites from each other's plates. It's domestic in a way that should probably scare me, but instead, it just feels… right.

"Seeing as you grew up in California, I imagine you're as familiar with Disneyland as you are with the back of your hand, eh?" I tease as we laze on the bed, chatting about our plans for the next day in the park.

Jesse laughs. "I've spent my fair share of time here, I'll admit. But since my nieces and nephews have grown up, I haven't come nearly as often as I used to," he says with a slightly wistful look in his eye. "We used to love bringing them here. It really is a magical place for kids," he says.

"Did you and your ex used to bring them? Give their mum and dad a nice break?" I ask, but Jesse snorts.

"Oh, god, no, Andrew was not a fan of Disneyland. I used to come along when Jeff and Dani would take them, and then when they got older, I would bring them on my own. Actually—" He pauses. "—Andrew wasn't a fan of kids in general." He scoffs. "Which is why it's so very ironic what happened."

I raise an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

He grabs his wine glass from the nightstand and takes a long sip. "Well, I think I've probably told you that he cheated?"

I nod. "You've mentioned. But I'm getting the idea there may be more to the story."

"You could say that." He takes a deep breath. "He'd been having an affair with a woman he worked with for years. She got pregnant. He had to choose between our marriage and being part of the baby's life. He chose the baby."

I blink at him. "Holy Christ, I didn't realize. I'm so sorry."

He shrugs, his eyes not meeting mine. "Aren't you going to ask me how I never suspected? How I could possibly not have known what was going on?"

"What?" I ask, confused. "Jesus, of course not! How on earth could you be expected to know something like that?"

He huffs. "Well, that always seems to be the first question anyone asks." His expression softens as he finally meets my gaze. "Thank you. For not assuming I'm either willfully ignorant or as blind as a bat."

I grab his hand from where it rests on the bed. "I'd never think either of those things about you."

He gives me a small smile. "Andrew is a pilot," he begins. "A few years ago, he got an opportunity to relocate to New York. It was a big deal for his career—more routes, better advancement prospects. We talked it over, and I was supportive. I mean, it meant we'd be apart more, but I wasn't willing to leave the West Coast because of my family and my business with Jeff, and I wanted Andrew to succeed too."

I nod, not wanting to interrupt.

"He got a roommate there, a flight attendant he worked with. Ashley." Jesse's jaw tightens. "She was great. I would have even called her a friend. It made sense financially, and I liked that he had some company when he couldn't make it home on his days off. I was fine with the whole thing."

He lets out a bitter laugh. "Turns out I should've been a lot less fine with it, since they started sleeping together almost right away. For years, he lived this double life. When he was in San Diego with me, he played the devoted husband. In New York, he and Ashley were building a life together."

Anger on his behalf surges through me. "God, that's absolutely vile. How did you find out?"

Jesse's eyes meet mine, pain evident in their depths. "She got pregnant. And suddenly, Andrew had to make a choice. Us or them."

"And he chose them," I finish softly.

Jesse nods. "It was the right decision, of course. There was a child involved, after all. But it sucked for me at the time. Although, who the hell knows, if they hadn't gotten pregnant, the whole thing could still be going on, and I might have no idea to this day."

White-hot rage courses through me. What a bastard. The urge to unleash a torrent of curses is overwhelming, but I bite my tongue. Instead, I take a deep breath and squeeze Jesse's hand tighter. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. You didn't deserve any of it."

"Thank you," he says softly. "I know that now, after a few years of intense therapy. But do you know what still messes with me?"

I shake my head. "What?"

He pauses, swirling his wine like a sommelier. " I knew . I knew right down to my bone marrow that Andrew was my person. But I was so, so wrong. And if I was wrong about that, what else am I wrong about?" He shakes his head in frustration.

I nod. "I can understand why you'd see it that way. But you must know that it wasn't your fault. You trusted someone you loved, and he betrayed that trust. That's on him, not you."

"Intellectually, I get it. But actually being able to put myself out there again, to trust that I'm not going to get burned… that's a whole different ball game."

"Jesse," I say, waiting for him to meet my eyes. "I want you to hear this. You are not broken. Don't let that arsehole's actions define the rest of your life." I take a deep breath. "Don't cut yourself off from the possibility of love just because one relationship didn't work out like you thought it would."