Chapter 42

Ivan’s cock softens inside me and slips free, separating us. I miss the fullness not just from his cock but also from his love, the connection we have when we’re locked together. His eyes clear of the orgasmic fog, and the blue returns as the inky black of his pupils diminishes. He smiles so softly my heart contracts. My love for him is painfully deep. He’s worth the loss of my parents. He’s worth everything. If I ever lost him, I would break irreparably, but it would be worth the pain just to have known love as deep as this exists.

Ivan kisses me, rolls to the side, and flops onto his back and his head on the pillow. With his eyes closed, he lets out a little chuckle.

“What?” I twist onto my side.

“I never thought being edged could be so much fun, but be warned. I’ll pay you back for that.”

“Bring it on, big boy.”

The cum drying on my stomach itches, and I grimace. “I’m going to jump into the shower to clean all this off.” I sit up and swing my legs over the side of the bed, wincing a little at the twinge in my arse, but it’s an ache I’m more than willing to bear.

“I’ll join you.”

We stand under the huge rainfall showerhead. As the hot water pounds down on us, I wash him, letting my hands roam over his chest and arms, the muscles tight and sinewy from manual work and all the surfing. He doesn’t have my muscle build, but he’s probably as strong as me. He massages shampoo through my hair, a look of determination on his face as he keeps the bubbles out of my eyes.

The thought hits me of what I want next for us. I want to marry him. I want us to have more children. To fill this house with love and joy.

“Merrick thinks we should turn the other barn into a hospitality venue to host weddings and parties. It’s incredibly lucrative and wouldn’t cause us much work. Apparently, wedding planners are a huge thing now, and they are responsible for all the furnishings, caterers, etc. We just provide the venue. What do you think?”

Ivan tips my head back to rinse the shampoo. “Really?” he says after a couple of minutes. “A wedding venue? I’m not sure, babe. I don’t think I want all that going on all year round. It would be a lot of noise, and Milo could get unsettled by it.”

“That’s what I thought too, but we decide when to take bookings. We could do two or three a year if we wanted. Or more, if it didn’t bother us. It’s the farthest barn from the house, and you can’t even see it. Let me show you the figures I worked out, and then we can make a decision. It doesn’t have to be now. We could leave it for a couple of years until Milo is older.”

“Okay, show me tomorrow.” He kisses me thoroughly, and any other thoughts float down the drain with all the bubbles.

“What time are we picking up Milo?” I ask Ivan as we finish breakfast. “As much as last night was amazing and what we needed, I’ve missed him.”

“Me too, and whenever we’re ready. I’ve called Mum, and she says she’s fine, and he’s been as good as gold.” Ivan looks past me to the window. “That’s Stacey’s car. What’s she doing here?”

“Maybe something happened to Drew.” I stand quickly.

We’re at the door before she’s even got out of the car.

“Hey, Stacey. What’s up? Is Drew okay?” Ivan asks.

“What? No, Drew’s fine, as far as I know. Ivan, I came to see you.”

I step aside to let her in. “Do you want a coffee or a cup of tea?”

“Tea would be lovely.”

Whatever she wants to talk to him about is not good. “Spill the beans, Stace.” Ivan clears the plates off the table and offers her a chair.

She sits and takes a breath. “I just want to give you the heads up that Kate’s house is going up for sale.”

Dread fills me. I don’t want her anywhere near Milo. “Have you seen her?”

Ivan’s gone still.

Stacey chews her lip and drums her fingers on the table. “No, I saw her husband.”

“Her what?” I look at Ivan, who sits with his mouth open. “Did you know she was married?” Has he failed to fill me in one important piece of his past with her?

“No! Christ, of course not. And if I had, I would’ve told you. You know that.” He looks stunned by her revelation. “I thought the house belonged to her parents. How can she sell it?”

“Apparently, her parents signed it over to her as a wedding gift. They got married in June. I’m so sorry, Ivan.”

June, fucking June. Did she wait for Ivan to take Milo before she got married? Is this why she didn’t want him? Because her new husband didn’t want someone else’s child? They probably have done a DNA test before he was born, so he knew he wasn’t the father. Fuck, I feel sick.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about. She’s nothing to me. She chose to abandon her child and promised to stay away from us. As long as she keeps away, she can do whatever the hell she wants.” Ivan sounds so hurt and angry. When I rest my hand on his shoulder, he settles a little and reaches up to clasp it. “I’m sorry, Stace. Thank you for telling me. Hopefully, the house will sell quickly, and we can close the whole shitty episode.”

“It will. We’ve got a waiting list of people wanting to buy it. I bet it will be gone within the week.” She looks at her watch. “I’d better go. I didn’t want you to find out any other way, Ivan.”

“You don’t want your tea?” I ask.

“No, thanks.” She stands and gives Ivan a sweet, sad smile. “You’re worth a hundred of her, Ivan. She didn’t deserve you then, and she doesn’t deserve a moment of your time thinking of her now. I’ll see myself out.”

“Thanks, Stacey. We’ll see you soon.”

Once the front door has closed behind Stacey, Ivan drops his head down onto his folded arms on the table. I pull up a chair and sit close to him. “That’s why she wouldn’t keep him. Milo wasn’t his.” His voice is quiet but firm.

I’m not surprised he came to the same conclusion as me. “Yeah, it looks that way. Maybe that’s why her parents wouldn’t have him because she wouldn’t be able to stay away from them forever. And seeing Milo grow up is against her wishes. Or maybe her husband’s.”

“If that’s how their marriage starts, it’s doomed for failure. The loss of a child, even voluntarily, will never be forgotten.”

“It’s her loss, love. Milo is here with you, and he can only thrive with the love you give him.”

“He’s here with you too. I can’t do this without you.” Ivan goes quiet, looking thoughtful as he mulls something over. “You know, this wedding event thing?”

“I…do.” Where is he going with this?

“It’s a great idea, but I have one condition.” His eyes sparkle.

“Okay, what’s the condition.”

“We’re the first couple to be married in it.” Ivan’s lips quirk up in a broad smile. Then the words sink in. Wait. What?

My throat is as dry as the Sahara Desert, and my words come out cracked. “Are…are you, um, asking me to marry you?” This is so unexpected. Has he thought it through? I don’t want him to rush because he’s hurting over Stacey’s revelation.

“I am. I’ve wanted to ask you for weeks, months, really. What do you say?” He’s blushing, actually blushing. Does he doubt my answer?

“I say yes. God, yes. A million times yes.” I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him.

“Y’know, I think we should pick up Milo in another hour or two.” Ivan grins.

“I think you’re right.”