Chapter 18

“Do you have any plans for New Year’s Eve? Is there something you do with your friends?” I ask Ivan. Would they have a tradition among their friends?

The sale of my house is going quicker than I expected, and we’ve already exchanged contracts and will probably be completing the process by the second week in January. Around the tenth, my solicitor told me.

This means I have to sort out the furniture, pack it up, and arrange to have it put into storage. I still haven’t decided where to store it. In London would be more convenient for the removal company, but bringing it down here and finding a storage unit would make it easier for me when I eventually find a place. The latter seems to make more sense.

“They’re our friends, babe, and the pub has a bit of a party. A lot of people come here for Christmas and New Year. You know, the ones with second homes. It’s usually a good night.”

Is that because Ivan has always had his pick of the weekenders at the party? Is that who Kate is—a weekender, someone with a house here? Why does the thought of him with a woman hurt me more than if it was a man? I shake the thought away.

“Why d’you ask? Is there something you want to do?” he asks.

“The house is going through quicker than I thought, so I need to pack everything up or at least organise for someone to do it for me. Would you like to come with me? We can spend New Year’s Eve in London, maybe go back to the club, celebrating the new year grinding up close to each other.”

Ivan steps up close to me, his eyes darkening, and licks over his lower lip. Oh, he seems to like that idea. My stomach clenches as lust rolls through me. As his mouth hits mine, I part my lips and slide my tongue over the seam of his.

I clutch his hips as he cups my face, the kiss deepening as our tongues glide and tangle together. His dick thickens against my own, and I reach around to cup his arse through his jeans.

A cough comes from behind me, and I pull away from Ivan. His eyes are full of humour, and a smile spreads wide over his face as he wipes his thumb over the now slightly swollen bottom lip. My forehead hits his shoulder as I hide from my next class.

“All of them?” I whisper.

Ivan chuckles. “Yep, all of them.”

“I can’t turn around yet.” My dick, while trapped in tight shorts with a loose pair over the top, is still hard but softening rapidly now laughter surrounds us.

I turn around to face them. They all fan their faces and crack up even more.

“You’re laughing at the guy who’s making you work out? On the last class before Christmas? Oh boy, are you in for some pain tonight.”

As Ivan saunters past me, he presses a kiss to my cheek and adjusts his crotch. “He’s hot, so sue me.” He turns around at the door. “Oh, Brodie. Yes to your suggestion.”

“Ooh, what did we interrupt?” Melanie unrolls her mat, pulls her pale pink hoodie over her head, and straightens her ponytail.

“Get your head out of the gutter, please.” I give her ponytail a tug. Mel is the kind of woman I would have asked out before I met Ivan. She’s kind, intelligent, and so much fun to be around, totally my type.

“Bully.” She sticks her tongue out but laughs.

“Let’s see if you’re laughing in forty minutes.”

Stacey spreads her mat out next to her friend’s. “What torture have you forced him to put us through?”

“I only asked,” Melanie says. “They’re too cute together. What’s Ivan saying yes to?”

I clap to get everyone’s attention. “Well done for making it to the class. Let’s get warmed up before we get this session started. Then you’re free to eat, drink, and be merry.”

I take them through the five-minute warm-up of hip flexers, lateral stretches, and other gentle moves to get them ready for the main workout.

Forty minutes later, we’re all a sweaty mess but smiling as we clap our success.

“Are you coming to the pub for New Year’s Eve?” Stacey asks as she mops the sweat from her forehead.

“No, I don’t think so. I need to arrange the packing-up of my house and get storage sorted. Ivan’s coming with me. We’re going back to the club where we first me—” Shit, what did I just say?

“What? You knew each other before you moved here. Is that why you came?”

“No, I didn’t mean that. I—fuck. Look, just forget it, okay?” I run my hand through my hair and walk away to some other members. When I say goodbye, Mel and Stacey have left too. I drive straight to Ivan’s. He’s not expecting me, but I don’t think he’ll mind.

“Hey, baby.” Ivan opens the door, but his smile falls. “What’s happened?”

“I kind of told Mel and Stacey we’d met before. Well, it slipped out. Do you think they will tell Drew and Merrick?”

Ivan opens the door wider to let me in and brushes his lips over my temple. “Does it matter?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, maybe.”

Why should it matter? My thoughts have been messed up over this. Will Merrick believe the odds of it being a coincidence? “He might think I knew and that’s the reason I came here—to be with you. That we’ve been keeping it a secret.”

“Is he likely to be annoyed, angry? He seems pleased you’re here.” Ivan scratches his chin. “He may not like that it’s me, that our night together made such an impact on your life. On our lives.”

“I don’t think so. He knows more than anyone that life can change in the blink of an eye. And that you can’t help who you fall in love with. I mean, look at him and Drew. Merrick wasn’t sure he would ever love another man. He was so in love with Josh. They were a beautiful couple together. Josh’s death left him a shell. He only kept going because of Willow. We often had to remind him to eat and sleep.”

It’s too early to tell Ivan I love him and a surefire way to have him running for the hills. I don’t even know when it happened. It was some revelation when we were fucking, a light bulb moment of clarity. I’ve never felt like this about anyone. I miss him when we’re not together, and when we are, I want to touch him, be close to him. I want him to be the first person I talk to, to tell him my news.

Ivan’s eyes sparkle with humour, and his lips twitch as if he’s holding back a smile. “Baby.” He brings his mouth to my ear. “I feel it too, and I’m guessing by the back-pedalling you did, you think it’s too soon to say. So we don’t have to say anything.” He taps his chest with two fingers and lays his hand flat. “But it’s here when we’re ready.”

I take his hand and place it over my heart. “When we’re ready.” I kiss him. “I’ll talk to him tomorrow, get it out of the way before Christmas.”

Drew and Merrick have invited us for Christmas dinner, and I want to clear the air by then. And Stacey shouldn’t have to feel she has to keep secrets for me. I asked her to keep it to herself, but it’s not fair on her.

We kiss again for a lot longer this time. I pull away regretfully. “I’d better go.”

“Stay.” He taps my heart again. “Please.” He gives me his best puppy dog eyes, and I nod. “That’s not going to work every time, mister.”

“We’ll see. Let’s get you in the shower.”

“Am I that stinky?” I clasp his hand and follow him upstairs.

As soon as we’re in the bathroom, Ivan slides his hands under my hoodie and T-shirt, pushing them up my chest and forcing my arms up. He licks a stripe from the centre of my chest to my armpit and inhales deeply.

“Fuck, I love the smell of you. I can’t get enough of it.” He does it again, and damn if it doesn’t turn me the fuck on.

I grab the hem of my top and pull it over my head, then push his head up and crash my mouth to his. “You’re so fucking sexy. I want you inside me, right fucking now,” I growl against his mouth and bite down on his bottom lip.

“Then strip, baby.”