Chapter Four Josh

When I awoke several hours later, the sky was pink and gold outside my window, the clouds highlighted by the setting sun in the opposite direction. I'd slept the entire day away. For one brief moment, I was confused, the window and the bed unfamiliar to me. But then my memories of the past couple of days came crashing back all at once. I was in Shifter Grove in a hotel for rogue werewolves because I was now a rogue werewolf.

I tried not to care and push it all away like it was no big deal. But even though I managed to force down my emotions and get a stopper on them before they got out, I knew it couldn't last forever. That bottle was already full, and it wasn't going to hold for long.

My stomach growled loudly as I turned over. I was starving.

Once again, I reminded myself that I could have a breakdown later. But right now, I needed to find something to eat. As much as I didn't want to take care of myself, the wolf was back and he was ravenous. Skipping another meal wasn't an option.

"Alright…" I grumbled, forcing myself up in bed, a hand patting my stomach. "I hear you."

I stumbled into the bathroom, taking a moment to freshen myself up before I went downstairs. One glance in the mirror showed me how much of a mess I was. My hair was sticking up in all the wrong directions and there were dark circles under my eyes. Altogether I looked a bit like a feral racoon. And, if I didn't get something to eat soon, that's exactly what I was going to become, except ten times as big and with a lot more teeth.

My stomach growled again, but this time with more feeling.

"Okay, okay!"

I snagged my key from the table and headed out the door. Sam said something about a meal being included with my room, which was lucky for me because I didn't have a lot of money. It needed to last me as long as possible. I took the elevator down to the lobby. As soon as the doors opened and I stepped out I saw Sam sitting behind the desk, a book in his hand and a smile on his face.

"Sleep well?" he asked, marking his place in his book.

"I guess."

"Good. Hopefully the room is comfortable?"

"It's a room."

His eyes narrowed, but he didn't comment about my complete lack of friendliness. In the silence stretching between us, my stomach growled again, this time loud enough for everyone to hear.

"You must be hungry."

"A bit," I nodded.

"I can make something for you." He got down from his stool and walked around the desk, waving for me to follow. "Come on. I'll show you the kitchen."

I nodded, following him through a swinging door to the backside of the hotel. The moment I stepped through, the scent of grease, cleaner, and fried foods met my nostrils. I took a deep breath, savoring the familiar smell of a commercial kitchen. It was just like being back at school again. No sooner had the warmth filled my chest than it was replaced by icy realization.

This wasn't school, and I couldn't go back. My dad made sure of that.

"This is the kitchen," Sam said as we stepped inside, his arms wide. "It's not much, but it's where most of the residents help out around here. It looks like they've already cleaned up for the night, so you might have to do your own dishes."

"That's fine," I replied, eyeing the giant stove and the deep-fat fryers.

"I've got pretty much everything in stock at the moment," Sam continued. "Anything you want in particular?"

"Is that the walk-in?" I asked, pointing to a large metal door on the far end of the room.

"Yeah?"

"Show me what you need to get rid of."

"I can make you whatever you want. It's your first day after all–"

"Please?" I insisted, trying to sound a little less grumpy.

Sam nodded. "All right…" He led me into the cooler, pointing to a few things as he went. "There's some potatoes that need to get used up and I got a ton of herbs this week from my supplier."

"Who's your supplier?" I asked, grabbing a large bunch of basil and pulling it to my nose.

"Local farmer and a good friend. He was one of my first wolves about ten years ago and he still gives me free veg to feed the others. He still won't let me pay him either."

"So potatoes and the herbs," I said, making sure we didn't get off topic. "Anything else?"

"There's always some defrosted chicken, but the rest of the veg should keep for a bit."

I started grabbing things off the shelves. "Great. That's all I needed."

Sam furrowed his eyebrows as I pocketed the basil and took a couple potatoes from the bin. "Are you just going to eat those raw?"

"No," I said nonchalantly, grabbing a block of parmesan from the far shelf. "I'm gonna make gnocchi."

"I don't have any gnocchi…"

"You will in about thirty minutes," I replied.

"You can cook?"

"Yeah."

"Do you need me to show you where things are?"

"Nope."

I really wanted him to just go away and leave me in peace, but he stood there watching me gather supplies. When I finally left the cooler with an armful of ingredients and started to work, Sam took a seat at the end of the stainless prep bench and watched with fascination. I did my best to ignore him as I got to work.

First, the potatoes were peeled, dropped into cold water, and then put on the stove to boil. While that was happening, I got my chicken prepped and seasoned before firing up the grill. I was just about to put it on before I caught Sam's gaze. I heard my mother's voice in the back of my head and I sighed.

"Have you eaten?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I was just gonna have some cold pizza."

"No," was all I said in reply.

Quickly, I peeled and cut another potato, popping it into the simmering water with the rest. Once another chicken breast was prepped, both of them went on the grill. After that I fished out a dusty mortar and pestle that looked like it hadn't been used in about ten years. Giving it a rinse, I got to work on the herbs. Basil, parsley, garlic, and olive oil went in. And a few minutes later, a deep green fragrant sauce came out. I sat it aside, flipped the chicken, and tested the potatoes. They were done, so they got drained and immediately rinsed with cold water before being mashed.

Sam stared as I worked. He seemed absolutely fascinated by the peed at which I produced a gnocchi dough, rolled it into coils, and cut it into little pillows of dough. When the chicken hit temperature, I removed it from the heat to let it rest. After that the now formed gnocchi went back into a pot of boiling water. In the meantime, I already had a pan going with butter and garlic, filling the entire room with the most wonderful scent in the entire world. As soon as the gnocchi floated, I scooped them out into the pan and gave them a little browning on each side.

The final phase was my favorite. A little white wine, some heavy cream, parmesan, and my herbal mixture went into the pan with the gnocchi. Less than a minute later I had gnocchi swimming in a simple pesto alfredo sauce mix. Grabbing bowls from the shelf, I doled out a helping for each of us. The chicken was sliced on the bias and splayed over the gnocchi. Afterward, I topped it off with parmesan and a little fresh parsley, cleaned the edges of the bowls, and slid one over to Sam.

"There ya go," I said, dropping my towel on the bench. "I hope you like Italian food."

"Wow…" Sam breathed, staring down at the steaming bowl. "That was something else to watch. You cook like a professional!"

"I'm not," I replied, a wave of regret washing over me. "I'm a stu–" I stopped. "I just like to cook."

"Well, it shows. This is amazing!"

"It's not complicated," I replied, handing him a fork. "This is about the easiest thing you can make."

"Pretty sure boxed noodles would've been easier," Sam chuckled, dipping his fork into the bowl. He made sure to get a gnocchi and a piece of chicken in the first bite, both dripping with sauce. The moment he brought it to his mouth, he closed his eyes and let out a very sexual-sounding moan. "Oh my fucking god…"

"That bad, huh?" I grinned.

"This might be the best thing I've ever tasted…" He took another bite, making that same noise again. "Christ, that's good. You should be a chef or something!"

The grin faded from my face. "Thanks." I took a seat next to him, taking a bite from my own bowl. "But that's not gonna happen. I'm nothing special."

"Why do you say that?"

I gestured around at the hotel. "Because I'm here. My life is fucked."

"Don't give up that easily," Sam said, waving his fork at me. "There's a lot of wolves that have come through here, and nearly all of them ended up with a life better than what they started with. That's sort of the magic of this place."

"Your hotel is magic?" I scoffed.

"I know starting life over is hard. I had to do it too. But when you have nothing to hold you back anymore, and you can do whatever you want, the possibilities are endless." He took another bit, his mouth full as he spoke. "I know it sucks now, but it'll get better. I promise."

"If you say so."

Did I believe him? No. Not even a little bit.

"Do you like to bake?" Sam asked, taking another bite.

"I just like to cook. Baking is fine. It's just more involved than making dinner."

"Can you make a batch of cinnamon rolls tomorrow morning?"

I looked over, seeing that disgustingly friendly look in his eyes. I didn't want to get up early and make them, but this man was letting me stay in his hotel and feeding me for free. How could I turn him down?

"Yeah. I can do that."

"Great," he smiled, stuffing his face even more. "I can't wait to try them!"

"How many guests do you have?"

"Fifteen, including you and me."

"I'll make three dozen then."

"Three dozen?" Sam laughed. "That seems like a lot."

I lifted an eyebrow in his direction. "You ever seen someone eat just one cinnamon roll?"

"Point taken," he nodded, pausing for a moment. "So… where are you from?"

I sighed, picking up my bowl as the depression threatened to overwhelm me again. "I'm gonna eat in my room. I'll come back and do the dishes afterward."

"Okay…" Sam replied in an apologetic tone.

But I didn't give him a chance to say anything else as I left the kitchen. I didn't care if he was letting me stay there. The last thing I wanted to do was talk about home, especially with a complete stranger.

I just wanted to be left alone.