27. Loren

27

LOREN

There's been something different about Oakley for the past few days. Since dinner with my family. He's shy again, but incredibly… soft? I'm sure that's not the word I want, but it's the one that comes to mind.

I wake up this morning with my skin feeling tight and itchy. It's an uncomfortable feeling that makes me agitated if I can't get it to stop. Usually, that means that I need to stop being touched.

It's not as easy as usual since I have Oakley asleep in my arms. I don't want to let him go, but I can feel the tension increasing inside me. My muscles are stiffening. My skin feels so tight it's going to crack.

Irritated at myself, I carefully extract myself from Oakley and put a few inches between us. I can still feel his body heat, which still makes me slightly uncomfortable, but it's not so bad. I don't feel like I'm coming out of my skin right now.

As I close my eyes, Oakley moves closer, his fingers wrapping around my arm. Immediately, I stiffen again, my entire body flinching. This isn't a good time to have this particular affliction!

Once again, I move a few inches away and roll on my side. Wrapping the blanket around his hand, I cover it with mine. I've never tried to work around this feeling before. It's bizarrely frustrating and yet I'm a bit fascinated with the puzzle. Is the blanket between our skin enough to turn off the way my skin crawls? Or is it the pressure of having someone else touching me, not just skin-to-skin?

The blanket seems to do okay.

Sighing, I close my eyes. I'm likely not going to sleep again, but I'm also not ready to get out of bed. As I'm drifting in that half sleep state, I think about Oakley's bed. All the blankets and pillows, the way it's pressed against the wall. I wonder if my bed is comfortable enough for him. Maybe he'd like something more like his bed.

I can make that happen. When I let him go home today, I'll go shopping for some more bedding, then get the triplets to help me move my bed against the wall. Actually, I don't think the frame is that heavy, I can probably do it myself.

"Loren?"

Opening my eyes, I find Oakley watching me, his eyebrows knit together.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes. Why?"

"I just… You feel far away."

I hate the uncertainty in his voice. It's incredibly frustrating knowing that I put it there. Sighing, I lean in close and press my lips to his, stifling the shudder of tension that moves through my body at the contact. "Remember what I said? Sometimes I need some space, but it has nothing to do with you. This has been my thing for as long as I can remember."

Oakley inhales deeply and nods. "Okay."

"Go take a shower. I promise, this is a me thing entirely. Rather inconvenient at times."

He tries to smile, but I can see his insecurity shining through his eyes. So different from last night when he rode me like a cowboy, commanding me exactly how he wanted me.

He's confident in sex, but he's insecure in life. And maybe I'm a little opposite. No, that's not it. I'm not insecure in sex. I just like to let him use me to find his pleasure. His happiness is far more important to me than my own and if he can feel good using my body, I'm sure as fuck going to let him.

Besides, I love how needy he sounds when he's telling me what to do. How he wants me to fuck him. To hold him down or steady him on top of me. Whether he wants me to hold still or do all the work. I don't even care what it is. I want it all. I want to feel him coming on my cock.

The way he says my name is intoxicating. How he gets off from the things I say, which is almost always in answer to something he's asked me.

"Go," I whisper. "Shower. I'll be right here."

Oakley takes another breath and nods. I watch as my boyfriend climbs out of bed, naked. As he disappears into the bathroom, I glance at my bedroom door. I know it's locked. Oakley makes sure to lock it every night now. He doesn't want someone to accidently come in when my dick is in his ass again.

He's had a hard time looking into Myro's eyes ever since. Even though we're now weeks beyond that. Wait… has it been that long? I'm not sure it has. It just feels like it's been ages.

That's a good thing, right? That we feel so comfortable together?

I climb out of bed and pull on my underwear before gathering Oakley's clothing from the night before. I arrange them on the bed and then frown. We need a better procedure than this. Going home the next day in the same clothes you wore the night before… isn't that what they call the walk of shame?

Honestly, there's no shame in spending the night with your boyfriend. Or even going home after a good night of fucking. If anything, it should be called an ‘I got fucked and you didn't' march.

Smirking, I stand in the door of my closet and decide I have plenty of room. The bathroom door opens and Oakley steps out, a waft of steam clouding around him. He gives me a shy smile but the way his shoulders are slightly hunched, I can tell that he's still feeling insecure.

Look at me recognizing how he feels!!

Crossing the space, I grip his shoulders. Yeah, nope—still feeling like I need some space. However, I don't let him go as I press a kiss to his head. He doesn't touch me in return, though. "Get dressed."

He nods and I let him go. Returning to my closet, I pull on a pair of pants and grab a large bag and my favorite shirt from the hanger. Before he can slip into his tee, I pull my shirt over his head. He laughs and pushes his arms through the sleeves.

"This is my favorite," I tell him. "I wear it all the time."

Oakley smiles, wrapping his arms around himself.

I push the bag into his hands. "Pack some clothes so you don't always have to wear the ones from the night before, okay?"

His cheeks flush and he nods. "Yes."

Once he's dressed, I pull him against me. The blanket separating us probably worked because the surface space that I was touching him through it was small. This is not. I can't hide the way my muscles tense, but I hug him tightly anyway.

"Loren, you don't have to?—"

"I want to. But yeah, I need some space this morning. So go hang out with your friends, okay? I'll bring you home this afternoon."

He presses his lips to my shoulder and despite the way my skin crawls, I can feel him smile. "Okay."

"Oh," I say, and pull away. I rummage around in my closet again until I find my leather gloves. Pulling them from the box, I slip the right one on and then offer my hand to Oakley.

He looks at it dubiously. "You weren't wearing this when you…"

I grin. "No. These are brand new. And no, I didn't ruin the last set with blood. Leather is finicky and I got them muddy."

Oakley doesn't look entirely convinced, but he still takes my hand. This is as comfortable as the blanket was, and I decide it's not just touch but pressure. Honestly, I'm impressed I don't feel this way all the time with how much Oakley and I touch. I'll take that as a win.

I walk him across the road and stop at the front door. After a long kiss so he knows that I want to touch him, I push the duffle bag into his hands. "Clothes and whatever else. I'll come back in a bit."

He nods. "Okay."

"Don't leave without me."

His smile is both amused and warm. "I won't."

I only head back to my house once he's safely behind the door.

Several hours later I have my bed pushed against the wall, but it looks weird. Maybe this is why my first thought was the triplets. With a sigh of resignation, I open my door and look for my brothers.

Avory and Ellory's door is shut. Unlike Myro, I don't open it when one of them answers with "Yes?"

"I need help," I say and even I can hear the pouting in my voice.

There's no noise beyond the door but a minute later, it opens. Twin faces look at me with wide smiles.

"I'm dying to know what made you actually ask for help," one says.

"And why you came to us instead of Imry," the other adds.

They're only in pants—matching pants so that's going to be an issue.

"You can give me a hard time and I'll ask someone else, or you can help me without comment," I mutter.

"We can do both." That's Avory. I'm at least 65% confident in that.

"In my room." I turn and head back down the hall.

"If you got Oakley stuck in some weird position, we're taking pictures."

That was Ellory. He's on my right. 68% confident.

I don't answer. As soon as we walk in, one comments, "What the hell did you buy?"

Glancing at the bags pouring from my closet, I shrug. I'm not sure they'd understand. They have one blanket between the two of them.

"What I really want to know is how you lugged them all upstairs without anyone hearing you."

Avory. Definitely Avory.

"Voss helped me. Without asking questions," I say pointedly.

"What do you need help with?"

I nod in the direction of the bed. "It looks weird there. But I need it to be against the wall."

"Why?"

"Without questions!" I insist.

"This better be kinky," Ellory mutters as he steps further into the room. Yes, confident that is Ellory. Well, still in the sixty/forty confidence range.

"Just tell me where it'll not look so weird."

"The shape of the room and the balance of furniture are working against you. Come on."

I follow beside triplet number three, and we move furniture around until I barely recognize the room. However, it feels much better. Weird that I even notice that shit, honestly.

"Thank you. You can leave now."

"You're really not going to tell us what this is about?"

"Are you going to give me a hard time if I do?" I challenge.

"I'm sure it's going to be adorable," Ellory says. That's definitely Ellory. Probably.

Huffing, I admit, "I'm trying to make my bed more like Oakley's," and gesture to the dozens of blankets and pillows I just bought.

They grin. I can tell that they have a lot to say about it.

"You may leave," I repeat.

"You don't want help with this?"

"I do not. I'm just putting blankets on the bed."

"How about you go help Dad with the greenhouse in the back and we'll set up your bed," Avory suggests. Yep, that's Avory.

This feels like a losing battle. Either I stay here and listen to them harass me, or I leave and let them make my bed. No matter which choice I settle on, they're not leaving. I realize now why I rarely ask them for help.

They meddle.

"I swear to hell, I'm going to skin you alive if you do anything other than make the bed," I hiss.

"At least he isn't swearing to god," Ellory murmurs, pretending not to smile.

"Yep, never again," I say as I head for the door. "I will die on the hill by myself before I ask you for help again."

Their twin laughter follows me as I hurry out of the room. As I'm heading downstairs, I realize what they said about Dad and shift course to head for the backyard. Sure enough, among the rubble that is the backyard with the disassembled pool and pool house, I find Dad in the back corner. Building. With his hands. Alone.

Where are the contractors?

I pick my way through the war zone and stop just beyond his pile of building shit to stare at him. After he's finished measuring or something, he looks up.

"Hey."

"I didn't know you owned anything other than suits," I say.

He laughs. "Of course, I do."

"And casual suits."

Dad laughs again and sits back on his haunches. "What's up, Loren?"

"Nothing. Avory and Ellory kicked me out of my room."

He raises a brow. "I'm not sure I want to know."

"Probably not. Even though I invited them in, I don't think I do either."

Dad stands and nods in the direction of a few chairs. Grabbing a couple bottles of Voss' waters, he hands one to me and we sit.

"Why are you building this?" I ask. I'm actually impressed. It has a shape and looks sturdy. I had no idea my dad could do this kind of thing.

"Believe it or not, your uncles and I used to help our father and grandfather build a whole lot of structures. One year when Noaz was ten and you were just a baby, we had a whole barn raising for Grandpa's farm."

Obviously, I have no memory of that.

"Myro might remember. Voss was busy herding the triplets while your mother took care of you, but Myro tried to help us. He was adorable."

I smile. The memories outside of Van Doren Technologies are few and far between. Not that they all felt like business. I remember running around with the triplets in Dad's office and along the corridors, peeking in on his staff.

They used to play hide and seek with us. Once, we had his entire floor playing tag. My favorite lady he had working for him used to play Go Fish with me.

Most of my family memories were either at home, battling our mother's clouded opinion about how her boys should love and live and behave, or at Dad's office. The latter were the happier ones.

Then when I got older and my temper started to truly develop, the fun changed from Go Fish to things on the aggressive side. He's never said so, but I think I'm the reason for the incarnation of the contract killing branch of Van Doren Technologies.

"What's this for? They said it's a greenhouse?"

Dad nods. "Your grandmother used to love when grandpa would bring her fresh flowers and greenery. I've seen you give Oakley flowers and the way he smiles when you do reminds me of Grandma so I thought maybe you'd like to have some flowers on hand for your friend."

"My boyfriend," I correct.

He smiles. It's not a normal smile. There's something… proud in it. Happy. I think. But I'm not sure why he's looking at me that way.

Dad pats my leg. "Your boyfriend. I'm really happy for you, Loren."

I nod, taking a sip of water. The sense of peace that surrounds me right now is new. I hope to keep it for the rest of my life.