Chapter 29

Penny

Incessant beeping.

The noise drilled into my brain, another reminder of yet the third horrible event in a few days. Only unlike the last two times I'd heard, seen, and experienced gunfire, I felt nothing. Not one damn thing.

I wasn't angry or sad, worried, or certain of death.

There was nothing inside.

Obviously, I was worried about my beautiful puppy, who hadn't acted the same since leaving the vet's office almost forty-eight hours before. There'd been no way I could have left Remington alone after what he'd endured, and I was reminded once again of Kraven's influence. Maybe the fact he had more money than God had also helped grease a few nurses' palms. Whatever the case, my fur baby was currently a Klingon. I was lucky all he'd experienced were bruised ribs.

Things could have been so much worse.

Sadly, Vissarian hadn't been so lucky. The single bullet to the chest had been similar to Misha's injury, only the bullet had come very close to the heart. Another inch and Kraven's brother would be dead from saving a life.

His brother's.

Maybe mine as well.

Kraven was also hurt, shot in the arm, but at least the bullet had gone straight through. He'd barely tolerated the EMTs cleaning and dressing the wound, still barking orders to his men. I'd been initially shocked the police had barely taken a statement, later realizing a man like Kraven likely owned at least half the police force in town.

The single lone gunman left had almost managed to kill us all. I rubbed my eyes, trying to make sense of a single aspect of what had occurred over the past few days. How could I? Everything was a tremendous blur. Blood. Gore. Violence. Death.

I was living a horror flick without the benefit of having popcorn and licorice.

A laugh bubbled to the surface from my parched throat. It was obvious I was cracking from being under duress and the constant state of fear. Even now, as I stood in front of the window of the small waiting room Kraven had managed to secure, I couldn't move. Couldn't think. Hell, I could barely breathe without wheezing. And that was all from terror. Yes, I'd had the wind knocked out of me twice. I likely had bruised ribs as well, but it was nothing in comparison to seeing Vissarian's horrified face when he'd gripped his brother's hand, inching toward the throes of death.

Or worse. Seeing Kraven's.

Shadows were starting to form as twilight fell, sliding across the parking lot like ominous demons from the depths of hell. I knew what they looked like since I'd experienced more than a few of them over the last few days. Even as the stars were twinkling in the sky, I wasn't certain I could ever look at them the same way again.

I had no idea where Kraven had gone but I'd never felt lonelier in my life. Yes, I'd been made aware there were enough guards both in and out of the hospital a war could be started, but that didn't provide any comfort or take away the chills. Maybe nothing would.

Kraven had remained in the hospital since his brother had been brought in, pacing the floors, growling like some caged animal. But I'd heard enough to know he was planning additional deaths. That's what he did.

His world.

His need for revenge.

His longing for bloodshed.

Maybe I was overblowing things, but he was the kind of man who when determined, always followed through. In truth, I admired that about him. I was also terrified by what it could mean.

It was all true what they said about tragedies. They did bring two people closer together. I had a need for the man unlike anyone else I'd ever met. I longed for his touch, his kiss, even his heated breath as he growled because I'd misbehaved.

I was almost giddy, which was purely from exhaustion.

So many lives lost. So much blood spilled because of what, greed? All the things the crazy man had said in the house had seemed like a movie and not real life. But the danger had been real. Far too real. I'd been certain I was going to die.

At least Konstantin had survived. Kraven's second in command had brought us a change of clothes and food, although neither one of us had been hungry. I had my purse, including my phone. Even a brand-new charger. He hadn't forgotten about my fur baby either, bringing food and a water bowl, and a couple of toys to keep Remington occupied. He'd even brought a blanket so Remington didn't need to lie on the hard, cold floor.

He'd kept Kraven up to speed on business but the man I continued to hunger for had constantly handled business, speaking in Russian or leaving the room altogether. I'd overheard enough to know he was searching for and rounding up whoever had been involved in betraying him.

I couldn't say I blamed him. How could I? I mean, it wasn't every day that more than one person in your life decided to betray you, which should have meant your death. I still couldn't believe what we'd been through. It was all too surreal, as if I was standing on the outskirts watching a very vivid television, flipping channels every so often.

Only this was Kraven's real life, a man who proved he could easily adapt to any situation, every horror.

Me? Not so much.

I was angry and confused, wanting so many things and fearing others. Hell, he'd even asked me questions about Jake, and I'd answered in a perfunctory manner, as if I was no longer traumatized by what he'd done. It was funny that the scars on my arms no longer itched. Maybe I was over the asshole.

Another laugh threatened to make me look like I was certifiably insane.

He'd actually asked me what I wished for the most and I'd been so angry, so terrified and in shock that they'd come easily, two whimsical wishes and one proving I was out of my ever-loving mind.

One: A long vacation on a secluded island.

Two: A family with at least three children and two dogs.

Three: Being able to snap Jake's neck and getting away with it.

Right. It was apparent Kraven's methods of doing business had rubbed off on me. The worst thing of all? I'd meant what I'd said. What did that make me? What had I turned into?

Suddenly, a heated shudder rushed down my spine and that meant one thing.

He was in the room.

The larger-than-life man who'd captured more than just my body.

While I didn't move at all, Remington not only announced the man's entrance, but his happy noises and wiggling backside had returned. I was almost brought to tears. My pup would be okay. I was now certain of it. And thankful.

We were all alone, just the three of us. I was no longer surprised how Kraven enjoyed cooing and whispering to Remington, showing off his soft little underbelly, which I had no doubt I alone had seen.

That made me adore him that much more.

Which is also what made what I'd decided that much harder. I only hoped he would understand and accept my decision, which remained to be seen. With a man like Kraven, you never knew how he was going to react.

I'd envisioned being locked in the cage that had slipped into my mind from almost minute one. God, that seemed like forever ago, not six days. I felt like I'd aged ten years. I know my psyche had.

"Such a good boy," Kraven said before returning to a standing position.

"He adores you, which confused me at first."

"Eh. He tolerates me."

"Just like I do."

He chuckled as he walked closer, easing a cup of something over my shoulder. "Drink this."

"What is it?"

"Do what I say, little girl."

"Yes, Daddy," I teased, accepting the cup. Coffee. I wasn't certain I could handle another chicory-flavored cup from the cafeteria. But I opened the lid because I knew he was staring at me. The aroma was unlike any of the coffee I'd had recently.

"Oh, gosh. That smells amazing," I told him.

"Take a sip."

I did what he said, shocked at what I tasted. "Oh, my. Hazelnut with a little real Irish cream?" I tipped my head toward him, noticing the slight sparkle in his eyes even though they held exhaustion in them as well.

"Very good. Nothing but the best for my lady."

His lady. Another shiver tickled all the way to my toes from hearing the words. "How did you manage it?"

He leaned against the window, giving me a cute little look with his nose and brow both furrowed. "You're really asking me that?"

"I forgot. You're not only the king but invincible at that." As soon as I made the comment, I regretted it, looking back toward the window. As if the view of the parking lot with the mass of luxury hotels in the background didn't make for a telling statement about the rich and famous. "I'm sorry, Kraven. I shouldn't have said that."

He said nothing for at least three full minutes while I sipped on the coffee, enjoying the taste more than I could say. I felt Remington's tail slapping against both of us, the little bugger doing what he could to weasel his way into the conversation.

Or lack thereof.

Even the first meeting with the man hadn't been this awkward. I had no idea what to say to him. Maybe because what I needed to say was burning in my mind, adding to the horrible sadness in my heart.

When he wrapped his fingers around the coffee cup once again, gently taking it from my hand, I sucked in my breath. It felt as if another wave of bad news was coming. I wasn't certain I could stand anything else.

I'd been so horrified, so worried, clinging to the man for what seemed like hours after he'd saved me the last time.

He placed my cup and the one in his other hand I hadn't even noticed on the small credenza, using a single finger to lift my chin so I was forced to look him in the eyes. "Everything is going to be okay."

"Why were you targeted? That horrible man wasn't your usual enemy."

Sighing, he crowded my space, the heat of his body exactly the warmth I needed. I found myself cupping both his sides, wanting to leave this wretched place for a safe respite to heal and make love, to laugh and do nothing but watch old movies. But that wasn't him. That wasn't what made the man happy. He was truly like some royalty, and I was the poor Cinderella, complete with soot on her face.

"Very astute. There are some people in this world who are more powerful and dangerous than I am. And before you say ‘not possible,' it's very true. I just need to decide how I want to handle it. However, I will not allow that to take away from enjoying my family any longer than necessary."

"Family? Have you heard something about Vissarian?"

"Other than that he came through the surgery just fine, no. Hopefully soon. But I'm talking about you as well."

I clamped my fingers around his shirt, the lump in my throat matching the horrific knot in my stomach. "We're not family, Kraven. You have your life and I need to find mine. We're two different people."

"That's what makes what we share very special. I'm sorry that it took me thirty-seven years to fully embrace that I need to have what you call normalcy in my life. I do. I want all the things you mentioned. Birthdays. Holidays. Vacations. Hell, I'll even learn how to cook on a barbeque. What I'm trying to say is that what I feel when I'm with you is more important than all the riches in the world. You are mine. Always mine. And I plan on making you my queen."

As always, he had no intention of letting me go. As he cupped the side of my face, rubbing my cheek until I shivered, he lowered his head until his heated breath was skipping across my lips and jaw.

"Lyubov' do kontsa vremen. Nikto bol'she tebya ne tronet." His whisper was husky, a little hoarse and full of conviction even if I had no idea what he'd just said.

But as he captured my mouth, the comprehension of just how much I loved him rushed into my mind. It was crazy, the thoughts something out of a romance novel or tragic poem. They were also not real. They couldn't be. Yet as he kissed me, really kissed me with all the passion that every woman dreamt about, not only did I know I wasn't fabricating my feelings, but my knees also knocked.

He swept his tongue inside, dominating as always but somehow sweeter than he'd been, more tender. Perhaps he was trying to tell me that he could be a regular person. I tasted coffee and maybe bourbon or cognac mixed with a dash of cinnamon and the combination awakened all my senses.

As he crushed his full weight against mine, his hold even more possessive, I wanted nothing more than to allow myself to fall even deeper into his dark abyss. Accepting who and what he was. He was everything I'd ever craved, just as he told me I was to him. Still, there was a strong chance I couldn't make him happy or vice versa. After all, a whirlwind romance predicated on gallons of spilled blood didn't make for the best forever romance.

But the feeling of being in his arms was something I'd always crave.

Always.

"Mr. Sokolov. I'm sorry to interrupt."

The female voice was soft and kind, a nurse who'd kept us informed over the last two days. While Kraven broke the kiss, his eyes pierced mine as if telling me we had all the time in the world.

"That's fine. Is it Vissarian?"

"Yes," she said. "He's awake and asking to see you."

"Thank you very much," he said in a breathless whisper. "I'll be right there."

When we were alone once again, I pushed away from him. "Go see your brother."

He closed and rubbed his eyes. "I will. Then I need to take care of some short business. I promise I won't be long. Then we'll head to another location I own so you can get some rest. Okay?"

"Okay." I nodded, knowing that's what he needed. When he started to walk away, I gripped his arm. "This isn't the right time to say this but…"

"But?" He used the same single finger, turning my head as he'd done before only this time, there was love in his eyes and I almost broke down.

"I love you, Kraven. I know it's soon and maybe crazy, but I do. Not because you saved my life or because you plied me with beautiful clothes, or even because you were kind to my puppy. Maybe I don't know the reason, but I feel it in my heart and soul."

"You don't know how that makes me feel, baby. You're everything I've ever wanted."

But I knew he could never say he loved me.

"What did you say in Russian a second ago?"

He grinned. "I said love until the end of time. No one else will touch you. I mean that, Red Penny. Just remember that. Besides, if you dare try and leave me, there won't be a single place on earth where I won't be able to find you."

"Ha. You might be surprised."

"Don't try me or you'll get the spanking of your life." He grinned, which almost surprised me. At least his brother was going to be just fine. I was so happy for both the men.

I watched him walk out and leaned against the wall, folding my arms. I waited for a few minutes, trying to collect my thoughts and what was left of my mind. When I finally found the courage for what I needed to do, I moved toward the bag of items I'd stashed together before grabbing my purse, pulling out my wallet. As I glanced at the door, I bit back a strangled cry before looking at the money I'd taken from Kraven's wallet—that I'd stolen.

A couple thousand dollars wasn't that much but it should help me get out of town.

But even in doing so, it would shatter what was left of my heart.