Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

‘What took you so long?'

Noah buzzed in, because this time Quinn had locked the downstairs door, and he looked amused. His hair was messier than usual, and he was dressed in a thick coat and relaxed jogging bottoms. It was quiet in Hay and late at night, so Quinn was optimistic that he got in without being spotted.

Noah smiled. ‘Had to get dressed.'

‘You call putting joggers and a hoodie on getting dressed?' Quinn said, taking Noah's coat and hanging it up.

‘You're not much better,' Noah said. ‘Besides, I wasn't wearing anything.'

Quinn almost dropped the coat. ‘You write naked?'

‘Sometimes.'

‘Oh, Jesus.'

Noah's hands slipped in his jogging pockets. He looked around the apartment, cleaned only five minutes ago by Quinn, who panicked that he'd asked the author over. ‘How come you invited me over?'

‘I … don't know,' Quinn said. ‘Can't sleep.'

‘No, me neither,' Noah said. ‘I broke up with Matty.'

Quinn yelped, covering his mouth. ‘Sorry?'

‘It's okay.'

‘No, I mean, did I hear you right?'

‘That I broke up with Matty?'

‘Exactly that.' Quinn sank onto the sofa, light-headed. Maybe it was the hour of the night. ‘What? Why? Oh, god, was it my fault? Did I do something? It wasn't yesterday, was it?'

Noah joined Quinn, but not close enough. Sitting across from Quinn like they were mutual friends at a party.

‘Actually, Quinn, yes.'

Quinn shook his head, unable to believe his words. He'd broken up a partnership? How would he be able to live with himself?

‘You've gone pale.'

‘I'm scared.'

‘Why are you scared?'

‘Please, Noah, tell me I didn't break you up.'

Noah grimaced. ‘Well…'

Quinn let out a groan, hunching over. Noah, next to him now, patted his back.

‘It's okay,' Noah soothed. ‘Honestly, Quinn, it's not your fault.'

Quinn took a deep breath, feeling hot. He'd never wanted to break them up. Maybe that was why Noah accepted the invite with ease: he wanted revenge.

Sitting up, Quinn braved a glance at Noah.

He didn't look distraught. He looked dashing. Like he had no worries and everything was together for him.

‘It was time,' Noah said. ‘I think last night reminded me of that and brought it home. Matty and I… We'd been having problems. He flipped when he saw you with me in the room.'

‘He knew what happened?' Quinn put his head in his hands.

‘Nothing happened,' Noah said.

‘But something almost did.'

Noah touched Quinn's hands, removing them from his face with a gentle ease. They looked at one another, Quinn trying to understand what he was thinking.

‘It was the final straw for me,' Noah said. ‘The things he said, the way he didn't believe me when I told him nothing happened. There was no trust there. He didn't trust me not to do anything. Assumed the worst of me.'

‘Would something have happened, Noah?' Quinn whispered. ‘If Matty hadn't walked in?'

Noah bit his lip, almost making any reserve Quinn possessed wither into pieces. ‘That was another thing.' Noah moved closer to Quinn. ‘I wanted to kiss you last night, Quinn.'

This couldn't be happening. Quinn threw his head back, leaning against the sofa. He glared at the ceiling, aware that Noah stared at him.

‘Poor Matty.'

‘I'm not saying anything has to happen,' Noah said. ‘Especially with what's happened between me and Matty. But we've not been good for the whole year. I'm surprised we've lasted this long. It's not your fault. The relationship was over and it ran its course. It's just… You helped speed up the process.'

If what Noah said was true, Quinn could feel somewhat better about the ordeal. Sure, maybe he'd been the crux, or the straw that broke the camel's back, but that was it. He'd stepped in at the last moment when the foundations were ready to cave in.

‘This is … a lot.'

‘I appreciate that.'

Quinn fixed Noah with a stare that he hoped told him he was in control of the situation. Even if he felt anything but. ‘You mean it when you say it wasn't my fault?'

‘Yes. You remember when I spoke about being heartbroken?' Noah asked, and Quinn nodded. ‘Well, I've been heartbroken for about six months. Because I haven't had the heart to tell Matty that it's over. And the way he's been towards me, behind closed doors … well, it hasn't been good. We would have broken up after Christmas, if not now. These things happen. This needed to happen.'

Quinn reached out for Noah, taking his hand in his. Noah breathed, looking down at Quinn's fingers.

‘Where is Matty now?'

‘Well, that's the thing.' Noah sighed. ‘He can't go home. The snow's back. We're snowed in again. So, he's staying in another room. Maybe he'll go before Christmas, I don't know. But it's a little awkward right now.'

‘Do you want to stay here tonight?'

Noah looked stunned. ‘Please don't think I came here tonight under the pretence of anything.'

‘I invited you.'

‘I know, but I still came.'

Quinn squeezed Noah's hand. ‘I know you didn't come here under any other pretence, Noah. My offer still stands. If you want to stay here tonight, you can.'

‘Thanks,' Noah said. ‘I'd like that.'

Quinn smiled. Switching on the TV and grabbing a blanket, they settled on the sofa to watch a sitcom. Within half an hour, Noah's snores reached Quinn. He looked uncomfortable, so Quinn tried to tilt his head. Noah groaned, eyes flickering open.

‘Sorry,' Quinn whispered.

But Noah smiled, reached for Quinn, and hugged him. Quinn took a breath, unsure what to do.

‘Hug me, handsome,' Noah whispered.

Laughing, Quinn wrapped his arms around Noah, as his head rested on Quinn's chest. Quinn watched the sitcom as Noah drifted back to sleep, but he didn't take any of it in.

* * *

Without Ivy, the signing the next morning would have been a disaster. Quinn was one hundred per cent sure of that. When he opened the shop, it didn't take long for people to arrive before Blair even appeared. Quinn thought he'd been proactive by prepping the author signing place at the back of the shop last night, but now he realised he didn't know how to make sure people queued adequately.

‘Line up, line up,' Ivy ordered as she ushered people into place in the warm shop. Incense burned in each corner. ‘Queue in the first aisle. Exit through the second. If you want to buy books, third aisle to the till.'

‘Wow, she's got this covered,' Daniel said.

Quinn thought he might have been able to do something similar, but his thoughts were all over the place after last night. Noah was still upstairs.

‘Blair isn't going anywhere!' Ivy called to the throng of people, proceeding to explain the queuing situation. ‘He will have time for you. We will have tea and coffee available as you wait!'

This seemed to appease the crowd, wrapped up against the elements and now queuing down the street. As Ivy returned to the shop, Quinn beckoned her to the counter.

‘We have tea and coffee?'

‘I brought urns,' Ivy said. ‘Coffee urns. I'll get some made up now.'

There was a commotion at the door, and Ivy turned with searing eyes, no doubt ready to shout at the rowdy customers. Quinn, thinking that these signings were going to be a bad idea, was relieved to see her reach out and hug Noah, who got through the door, looking shocked and relieved to be alive. With a jolt, Quinn recognised the auburn jumper Noah was wearing: it was his own. He still wore the joggers from the night before, but paired with the jumper, they looked less casual. Somehow, Noah made joggers look sophisticated.

‘Thank goodness you're here,' Ivy said. ‘We need help. Noah, you can direct people at the signing desk down through the aisles. Let me explain to you how the system works.'

Quinn didn't have time to say hello. His mind raced that Noah was wearing his jumper like they did that. Like that was a regular and normal part of their day. He didn't mind one bit, but seeing Noah in the jumper left him dumbfounded.

‘Chop, chop, Quinn,' Ivy said. ‘Gosh, what's with you today? Hello, you there at the door. Queue like the rest of them, please.'

‘This way for Blair's signing,' Noah called, ignoring the shocked stares he got from customers. With the three of them working together, they got the crowd moving with efficiency, and it left Quinn no time to think about anything other than ensuring people had a good time.

Once the teas and coffees were handed out, disgruntled customers thawed, and all was forgotten as soon as they got to meet Blair Beckett, who was as charming and vivacious as ever. Quinn could hear his happy-go-lucky voice from the back of the shop at the counter, so loud it cut through the excited chatter of people here to meet the news reporter.

But he wasn't as loud as Deb and June, who, when they got in the shop, were shocked to see Noah at the signing desk, too. Noah outshone Blair during the signing, but each time, Noah deflected, ensuring that Blair had his moment, and telling them he would sign books at the same time, same place, tomorrow.

There was no appeasing Deb and June, and they got their books signed by both of the men and then promised to come back tomorrow with their other editions from home.

Quinn's eyes filled with tears, but not because of Deb and June. Instead, when there was a moment to breathe, he observed the scene before him. Radiant faces, laughter, excited people craning their necks to get their first glimpse of Blair at his desk. By this point, word spread that Noah was also there, and people couldn't help but whisper about whether he would sign books.

Quinn could see the community coming together, as well as faces he didn't recognise, and he couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. He sank back into his armchair, letting the tears flow, realising how lucky he was to have this, to be part of this, to feel so supported and loved.

Ivy, still at the door, caught him crying. ‘Quinn?'

Quinn shook his head, assuring her he was okay. She seemed reluctant to not come to him, but she stayed at the door and greeted those still pouring through.

People seemed to come from all over. To his small shop, his queer shop, the space that meant too much to him. A pang of sadness welled in him, the tears overflowing now; the dam broken.

Noah, who was looking down the second aisle, hurried towards him. His figure blurred from Quinn's tears, but the familiar scent of citrus confirmed it was him. Soft hands were on Quinn's arms again. His breath, minty fresh, brushed across his skin.

‘What's wrong? Is everything okay?'

‘I'm fine.' Quinn wiped his tears. ‘I just…' He gestured to the people in line, a smile breaking through the tears.

Noah wrapped an arm around Quinn, bringing him close. He didn't want to cry on Noah's shoulder, but he leaned against him, feeling exhausted.

‘This is all for you,' Noah said. ‘Everyone is here for you.'

Fresh tears rolled down Quinn's cheeks. ‘I know.'

Noah's finger ran across Quinn's face, brushing away the tears. Their eyes met, stood at the counter of their shop, and Quinn wished he wasn't an ugly crier. Noah smiled, his eyes darting to his hair, to his lips, to his neck. Quinn noticed the inch of space between them and closed the gap, wishing he could be closer, even though he was already against Noah.

‘Thank you,' Quinn whispered.

‘Anytime.'

Noah moved away first, leaving Quinn standing at his desk, remembering where he was. He looked around, almost expecting the whole shop to be looking at him, but of course, they weren't. Mere seconds had gone by, but it felt like forever for Quinn.

Only Ivy saw the exchange. She raised an eyebrow, a slight smirk on her face, and Quinn shrugged, the image of the lover's tarot card coming back to him.

Noah was back at the signing desk now, helping to guide people out of the shop, and Quinn wished he was still next to him. Daniel waved goodbye, joining the throng of people after completing his shift.

The last customers, being Deb and June, left the shop with reluctance, leaving Quinn with Ivy, Noah and Blair.

Ivy closed the door, a thud that was a bit too loud, and turned the sign to closed. She wiped her brow. ‘Phew. What a day.'

Her exhaustion was reflected in Blair's immaculate face, and Noah's casual lean against the nearest bookshelf. Quinn was sure he looked just as tired because he felt like a thirty-year-old Slinky with no slink left.

‘I can't thank you all enough.' Quinn fell back into his armchair, feeling like he needed cracking like a brand-new book.

‘Thank us? Thank you!' Blair leaned against the bookshelf next to a poster of himself advertising today's event. ‘That was the most fun I've had in a long time!'

‘More fun than presenting the six o'clock news?'

‘So much more fun!'

Ivy made her way to the signing desk, calling as she went. ‘I think tomorrow's signing will be just as busy. Quinn, do you have Noah's books?'

‘They're in the confessional booth.'

‘Blair, would you be so kind as to help me set them up?'

‘Of course.' Blair followed Ivy to the back of the shop, looking like a golden retriever who was fetching his ball.

‘I can do that later, Ivy,' Quinn called. ‘You need to rest.'

‘Nonsense,' Ivy dismissed. ‘You rest. I've got this covered.'

It left Quinn with Noah at the front of the shop. Noah smiled, walking towards Quinn. He sat on the edge of the counter, a mere few feet from him. The messages from last night, the feeling of him a few hours ago, all came back to him.

Noah looked good today. His hands were in his pockets, and he let his feet dangle off the table, waving them back and forth. How such a simple action could make Quinn want to explode with admiration was beyond Quinn's comprehension.

‘My jumper.'

‘I hope you don't mind.'

‘No, it looks good on you,' Quinn said. ‘You should keep it.'

‘Oh no, I couldn't…'

‘Seriously. Suits you better.'

Noah brushed at the jumper, somewhat self-consciously. Quinn admired him and the way his hair fell over his forehead.

‘I'm looking forward to tomorrow,' Noah said.

‘I'm glad. Me too.'

‘Today was a success.'

‘It was.'

Noah's eyes drifted to the window, no doubt taking in the castle above them. Quinn wanted to follow his gaze, but right now he couldn't allow himself to think of the castle, and what the opening meant for his shop.

From the back of the shop came a tumble, and Ivy yelped.

‘We're okay!' Blair called, and then there was laughter. ‘Ivy dropped some boxes.'

Noah smiled at Quinn.

Quinn sunk back into the armchair. ‘What?'

‘You're just…'

He said nothing more. Quinn was a fish on a hook, being drawn in, even though he didn't want to be. ‘I'm just what?'

‘You're fun, Quinn,' Noah said, as Quinn was torn out of the water and into a world where he couldn't breathe.

Fun. Wasn't it time he had a little fun?