Chapter Fourteen Heimdall

W hen I finally woke, the light above me had faded. I blinked my eyes, surprised to find myself staring up into the night sky. Stars were strewn in the darkness. Filling the space with twinkling light that convinced me if I just reached my hand out, I would be able to touch them.

But I didn't need the stars. Not when the heat of Loki was curled up against me right there on the cavern floor. It felt so right having him there in my arms. I felt like the world outside couldn't touch us there and I wished it could stay that way forever. Those stars floating above came with a price. To get any closer to them would mean endangering this bliss I'd come to know.

However, now that I'd found my mate, nobody was going to take him away from me. Not even my father. I knew, deep down, he'd never accept us. I'd strayed too far from his ideals by not leaving Loki for dead at the beginning of this venture. Now that we'd gotten intimate, there was no redeeming myself. Should he ever find out, I could kiss my position in the pack goodbye.

Then again, what position did I have? As far as I knew, my father thought I was dead. In fact, he barely stuck around long enough to find out. The moment I fell into this place, he abandoned me like I was nothing. Me. His own son. He just walked away, not even a tear falling down his cheek for me. It made me wonder if my mother had been right before she left. When she told me that my father would only love me as long as I was useful, just like he'd done to her.

I shook my head, trying to push those thoughts from my mind. I didn't want to think about that. Not right now when I had so much happiness tucked in my arms. It was amazing to me that such an annoying and downright rude wolf could bring me so much joy. But the longer I spent with him, the less abrasive he became. He seemed to soften around me, and his words held less bite than usual. I had a feeling that under all the pain and trauma of losing his father, he was probably a decent guy. However, that kind of grief had a way of turning people rancid when it sat inside them for too long. I hope it wasn't too late for him, that I'd gotten to him in time.

It was also amazing how quickly I acclimated to the idea of being with a man. I hadn't felt the least bit of hesitation taking his cock into my mouth. In fact, out of the pair of us, he seemed to hold back the most. Well, at least until I had my finger in his ass. Then he'd do anything I told him to. I liked that independent streak in him, but there was something really hot about getting him so malleable with just a finger.

My cock twitched at the thought, lengthening between us. Loki stirred for a moment, but didn't wake. Instead, he just nuzzled his head into my neck, seeking the warmth of my body. As much as I wanted to get my dick sucked again, I wouldn't allow myself to wake him. After our race down an icy river in the darkness and nearly freezing to death, he needed his rest. And so did I.

So, with a smile on my face and a renewed determination to keep my new mate, I closed my eyes and pulled him in tight. His fresh scent filled my nostrils as I buried my face in his long dark hair.

In the morning, we were getting out of this cave. And even if we had to run away from Fenris and everything we'd ever known, I wasn't going to let him go.

He was mine .

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I awoke this time to bright sunlight and the feeling of a warm mouth wrapped around my cock. Instead of saying anything or opening my eyes, I gave a satisfied groan and let Loki continue his work. His lips were stretched tight around my shaft as he tried to take all of me down his throat. One hand gripped my thigh while the other moved furiously between his legs, jerking his own morning wood.

Reaching up I laced my fingers through his long hair and pushed him down further, a small sound of protest echoing through the cave. But to his credit, he didn't pull back. In fact, my actions seemed to only encourage him further. With renewed vigor, he took my length as far as he could, his tongue working furiously against the sensitive underside of my cock. I moaned in pleasure, feeling him do the same.

I wasn't sure how long he'd been awake or how long he'd been sucking my cock while I was still asleep. But I didn't care either. I was all too happy to let him use my body anyway he wanted to. In fact, I couldn't think of a better way to wake up. It was an incredible feeling to have someone so ravenous for you that they couldn't hold back. And it proved to me that Loki wasn't kidding about the mate thing. He really did want me like that.

A couple minutes of slurping and sucking was all it took to drive me to the edge. Tightening my grip on Loki's hair, I drove my cock deeper, my muscles tensing all at once. He must've known what was coming because he opened his throat wide, eager to gulp down my load.

And that's exactly what he did as I cried out, filling his mouth with my seed. I bucked and pushed, trying to get deeper inside him, the need to breed filling me from head to toe. At the same time, he whimpered around my cock, his own shooting cum across the stone. My cock gave a heavy twitch in appreciation. Just knowing he could cum from sucking me was an incredible feeling. I never knew such a thing could be so hot.

"I could wake up like that every day," I said as Loki collapsed on top of me, the pair of us spent before we'd even started the day. "You're really fucking good at that."

"Thanks," he breathed heavily, grinning when he thought I wasn't looking. "It was only my second time."

"You're a natural born cocksucker."

Loki looked up at me, trying to figure out whether he should be offended or excited or prideful by my proclamation.

"Thanks, Hamball ," he said at last, adding a little sarcasm to his smile.

"Anytime, Dinky ."

"For fuck's sake…" Loki sighed, shaking head. "Do we already have pet names for one another?"

"Seems like it. I guess it was bound to happen, eventually. We are mates after all."

Loki paused, his amber eyes fixed on mine. His fingers twitched nervously in his lap. "You really believe me about that?"

"I believe you because I believe myself," I replied. "I know you're my mate. It only makes sense that you feel the same. Besides, considering you've saved my life twice and you haven't tried to kill me yet, I'd say there's something holding you back."

"You saved me too, you know."

"I did?"

He nodded. "Last night. I would've drowned if you hadn't pulled me to shore. Then you warmed me up too. I never would've made it through the night if you hadn't."

"I sucked you off."

"Still," he grinned. "It worked. And that's what matters."

Suddenly I felt sort of embarrassed, my face flushing. "I was just… you know… trying to be helpful I guess."

Loki leaned close, kissing me gently. "Well, I'm glad you did."

We sat there for a long moment, our foreheads pressed together as we stared into each other's eyes. I wanted that moment to last forever, but there was a burning question on the tip of my tongue that I could ignore no longer.

"So," I said slowly. "What happens now?"

A long silence greeted my question as Loki lowered his gaze. I felt his heartbeat pick up, thumping against my chest. Both of us knew what awaited us outside this cave should we ever find a way out. There was a world out there that wouldn't take kindly to our pairing. In fact, it could be downright deadly .

"I don't know," Loki said at last. "And I don't care right now. We need to find a way out of this cave. That's more important than figuring everything else out." He lifted his gaze again, his hand cupping the side of my face. I saw a fierce determination in his eyes that I hadn't seen before. "But I'm not going to waste a minute here worrying about it right now. I know you're my mate and that's all that matters. So, until we find a way out of this place and have to deal with all that, let's just enjoy it, okay?"

There was a plea hidden behind his words, one that said he needed this respite from his grief. It didn't take a genius to see that Loki had been fighting for a long time. Fighting against his brother, his pack, and his own emotions. And of course, I was only too happy to give it to him. Out of everyone in the world that could've been my mate, I'd found one that understood what it was like to live under the constant pressure of other's expectations. Just as Loki had been bowing under the weight of his own pack, I'd been doing the same because of mine.

We had a lot more in common than I ever would've guessed.

"But I'm still going to kill Tyr," he added after a moment. "He needs to pay for what he's done."

All at once, that happy resolve I felt just seconds before began to slip away.

"You know I can't let you do that," I replied slowly. "I won't let you kill my father."

Loki let out a long sigh. "Then I guess we'd better enjoy what time we have in here. Because once we're out of this cave, mates or not, we'll be enemies again."

"I really can't change your mind about him?"

He shook his head. "Not unless you can bring my father back to life."

We both knew I couldn't. There wasn't a power in the entire world that could do something like that. Even the most powerful witches couldn't resurrect the dead. Once someone had slipped beyond the veil, that was it. There was no coming back.

"Try not to think about it," he added. "It's not worth worrying about right now. We need to focus on getting out of this cave."

I sighed and nodded, knowing he was right. The clock was ticking, and no amount of worrying was going to make it go slower. At least that's what I told myself. But thinking and doing were two totally different things.

"Any idea how we're gonna do that?"

"No. But with our clothes soaked and our flashlight gone, I think we'll have to do it in wolf form. The fur will help keep us warm and maybe we'll be able to see a bit better in the dark."

"Yeah. You're probably right."

"The river continues on from here," Loki added, staring off into the darkness. "It's slower and there's plenty of room to walk beside it."

I turned my face up toward the small hole in the ceiling. It was the third one we'd seen since we'd fallen in this place. If there were that many, chances are there was another. I just hoped it was one closer to the ground that we could actually climb up to. So far all we'd seen were openings in the middle of the ceiling.

"Alright," I nodded. "My wolf is feeling a bit antsy, anyway. It would probably be good to stretch all four legs for a while."

"I guess we should get going then."

I grabbed Loki's hand before he could stand up, pulling him back down in front of me. I looked into those amber eyes of his, reaching up and brushing the dark strands from his forehead.

"You really are beautiful," I said softly, cupping his cheek.

Some of the hard resolve in his expression broke, allowing a smile to peek through. I had a feeling Loki wasn't the kind that got many compliments. Considering how standoffish he could be, I doubted he ever let anyone close enough.

"You are too," he replied, placing a hand on my chest. "I never thought I could look at a man the way I look at you. But now I can't imagine it any other way."

"It's weird, isn't it?" I grinned. "That so much can change so quickly?"

He started to nod, but stopped, his smile fading away. "It's too bad it won't be enough."

I knew what he meant of course, that we could never be together with our goals so opposed. That once we left this cave, all of this bliss would come to a screeching halt. I wished more than anything that there was some way to resolve this so we could both be happy. Try as I might, I couldn't think of a way out.

"We should get going," I said at last, giving him a small kiss.

"Right."

Loki was the first to stand up, holding out a hand to help me to my feet as well. He picked through the wet shreds of his clothing, making sure there was nothing useful to be found. With the phone left behind and his pockets empty, it seemed like a desperate gesture. Not that I didn't follow suit and do the exact same thing, holding out hope that I had something useful by accident. But both of us turned up empty-handed.

"We'll follow the river that way," Loki said, pointing into the darkness. "Let's move slow and trust our senses. I don't want to end up in the water again. With any luck, we'll find another way out."

"And if we don't?"

"Then we'll turn around," Loki said, a sad expression crossing his features. "And enjoy what time we have left."

With that dire proclamation echoing off the walls, Loki closed his eyes and leaned forward, letting his wolf take over. I watched as black fur sprouted from his body, his bones cracking as he fell to all fours. In a matter of seconds, a large black wolf with golden eyes stood before me, staring up at me. I reached out a hand, ruffling the fur between his ears. He huffed in irritation but leaned into my touch anyway.

"Right behind you, Dinky," I said.

The wolf came out as I fell onto four paws as well, bright white fur covering my entire body. My tail wagged as I took a step forward, licking Loki's face. He returned the affection before nodding toward the river. Together we set out into the darkness, sticking side by side as we followed the water.

I was so happy to be beside him that my tail wouldn't stop wagging. I knew together we'd be able to find a way out of this cave. But, in the back of my mind, I knew that the sooner we found an exit, the sooner we'd have to part ways. And as much as I had a duty to my father and the pack, I secretly hoped we'd never find a way out. Even if it meant we didn't survive.

If only there was a way to have both Loki and a life with him. I'd do anything to have that.