Chapter 15

Ruby went still underneath Ryker after he uttered those words. She could hear her heart thumping inside of her ears as she stared into his navy-blue eyes. Ryker did not move as he held himself over her. He just wore the sexy smirk she had come to fall in love with.

HE’S OURS! I KNEW IT!

But I don’t feel a bond!

It’s there! He can feel it!

BUT WE CAN’T!

Maybe you can’t. I have been trying to get you to bag this guy since we met him.

That does not mean that there is a mate bond there!

Scarlett sneezed at her. You might want to answer him.

“Uh… what?”

It was hard to think with Ryker’s amber and berry scent surrounding her. The warmth of his body alone made her feel as if he had her wrapped up in his arms, but having his scent around her only made it feel cozier.

“I felt it the moment I saw you just outside of the town’s lines, that inexplicable pull towards the key to my happiness and destiny. If you had not killed those wolves before I got there, I would have killed them myself.” His eyes sparkled as he talked about the memory, and Ryker smiled down at Ruby before moving on. “I had to fight Rainer for the first time in my life to not go after what we wanted and make it ours. I thought I was going to lose my mind during the hours that Nick updated me and said you hadn’t woken up yet. I played it off as much as I could, but he saw right through me. We both knew if I would have brought you here, I wouldn’t have let Nick near you until you wore my mark. So we took you to Tasha and Deacon’s.”

“I-”

Ryker put a finger to Ruby’s lips to silence her. A shockwave of heated tingles spread across her lips, and it made them tickle. Ruby squirmed a little, but Ryker’s form kept her mostly in place.

“Let me finish, please. The night I was overbearingly possessive was harder than it looked to not rip those guys to shreds. The thought of them touching you made me want to tear my skin off. Elias made it so much worse by asking you what other services you provided, and my mind went to thinking that he was insinuating for you to be on your knees… Rainer would have killed him and brought the Amber Plains pack knocking on my door. If it wasn’t for you screaming at us, I wouldn’t have stopped. I had to lock Rainer up for a month just to keep myself away from you.” Ryker bowed his head and shook it. “Then the Full Moon unlocked the bond entirely for me.”

Ryker stopped talking, he just stared into her eyes.

“So, why did you walk away after we had sex if the bond opened up to you?”

“Because it felt wrong that the first time you wanted to mate with me was because of your heat influencing you. That’s the only way I could walk away. Rainer did not want to continue anything until your body was over it.”

Ruby pushed herself to lean on her elbows, making her face be a few inches away from his. “Now what?”

She thought it was a logical question. Ryker made it seem as though he had been fighting himself and his wolf from pursuing her since the moment they met. He did not really explain why that was, but she hoped that this moment meant that Ryker would stop fighting it so hard.

“The only move I can think of that I have right now… is to keep myself from falling harder than I already have.”

Wait… what?

Ryker’s words damn near gave her whiplash. At first, it appeared he was spilling his guts to her in hopes she would accept him, and then it turned into pouring a bucket of ice water on her.

“I… I don’t understand,” Ruby stammered.

“Ruby, I am not the person for you. You deserve someone who is not running from responsibility. Someone you can rule a pack beside.”

Ruby pushed Ryker up and got to her feet. She was surprised at how easy it was to move him when she knew he was as solid as could be. The thud of her hands against his chest was proof enough of how thick of a man he was, but he allowed himself to be moved by her.

“Wait a damn minute. Who do you think you are to decide what I should do with my life? Mate or not, it’s mine. Not to mention, it is such a chickenshit of a thing to do to try to say that I should not want you. Drop the nice guy bullshit that you are playing here, and man up. What’s the real reason you are about to reject me right now?”

Ryker furrowed his eyebrow and took in a deep breath as if he was trying to remain calm instead of letting out a roar of anger. “I built this place to get away from the pack bullshit. I want nothing to do with it. Not to mention, the reason I am even here is because my best friend did not think I was fit enough to be Alpha. That same ex best friend wants me dead and has sent numerous wolves hunting me so he can kill me himself. Why the hell would I want you caught up in that?”

Ex-best friend?

“Tyson was your friend?”

Ryker’s gentle tone was now gone. “That’s all you got from that?” He rolled his eyes at her. “Yeah, he was my friend. Then he challenged me. I won, but I knew he would never accept that. Even if I was known as the Big Bad Wolf, I was not about to kill him because of his ambition. If he wanted the pack, he could have it.”

Ruby shook his head. “You gotta beshitting me! I was fated to the dickwad for a total of thirty minutes before he rejected me. Then I get fated to his best friend, who also seems to want to reject me?!” Ruby looked up at the ceiling screaming, “you have a horrible sense of humor, Moon Goddess!”

“You… were… his?” Ryker’s eyes were shifting around as he tried to make sense of what he was being told. “He rejected you?”

“Wow. And here I thought you were smart, but you can’t even comprehend that simple concept. Yes, and he rejected me.” Ruby made sure to spit out the last words.

“Why wouldn’t he want you?” Ryker’s tone truly came across as confused.

“Like you care! You want to do that, too!”

“I have not said I want to reject you!”

“You said you wanted to keep yourself from falling harder!”

“As in I don’t want to nurture the damn bond until I know this place is truly safe!”

Uh…what?

Ruby’s confusion must have been displayed on her face. Ryker was not making any sense to her, even though Ryker seemed to think that he was being as direct as he possibly could.

“I met a Witch named Rozalind after I renounced my position in the pack. I had already killed a few of my friends because Tyson had them come after me. I had tried to just be a nomad, a lone wolf, but there were spies that reported to Tyson in every area I found myself in. Rozalind found me covered in blood, most of it not my own, and said she could help me out. She brought me here, and she created the perimeter and bound it to me. It was a way for me to live my life without having to constantly look over my shoulder. Then, people started coming here from all over after I built the club. Some of the locals ended up in packs over the last year or two and bragged about the club and then led them here. It brought in a shit ton of money, so I just made it to where no one could speak the whereabouts of this place or even tell anyone I was here.”

“What does that have to do with me?” Ruby growled.

Ryker let out an exasperated sigh. “I can’t protect you and this town at the same time.”

“I can take care of my own damn self! And that has nothing to do with the damn mate bond. Stop being afraid to say what you actually mean, and spit it out!”

Ryker growled, grabbed her face, and pulled her to him. His lips crashed into hers as he possessively kissed her. Ruby’s instinct was for her hands to rush up into his hair and pull him closer to her, and as she did, one of his hands wrapped around her neck.

Ryker broke the kiss, way too early in Ruby’s opinion, and pressed his head against hers. “It means I would allow this world to burn if it meant keeping you safe,” Ryker whispered. “And if I am distracted by you, I can’t keep this place safe from Tyson.”

Uhm, has he forgotten that we are Shifters? That WE are an ALPHA, too.

An Alpha will protect what is his at all costs.

Screw him. We will, too.

“Who says he can find us?”

“Us? He is only looking for me.”

Ruby shrugged her shoulders and took a deep breath. It still pained her to talk about Tyson in any shape or form. Even though her “death” should have caused the bond to disappear, she still felt a faint twinge of pain as if it was still there.

“Tyson ordered for me to be killed after he rejected me before I got to complete the ritual. I apparently flatlined, and it could have caused the bond to be removed…” The next part scared her to even admit. What if this will cause him to fully reject me instead of just keeping me at a distance? “But there are times I still feel the pain of him rejecting me just like the moment he uttered those words when I hear his name. I’m not sure if that means I am still tied to him or not. I am going to assume it’s a possibility since you can feel the bond between us… but I can’t.”

Ryker pulled away slightly so he could look at her. “You can’t?”

Ugh, I hate how I can hear his pain when he says that.

“Well, not at the level that you can.”

Ryker swallowed hard as he thought of what to say next. Ruby felt her heart rate increasing, afraid of what might come out of his mouth.

“Explain?”

Ruby pushed on his chest slightly to make Ryker drop his hold on her. She walked back slowly until the back of her legs hit the bed and sat down.

“I can admit that I feel something for you. Scarlett certainly does. But I know what that bond feels like. I felt it with Tyson. What I do feel for you is not like that. I am attracted to you, I feel the heat between us… but I don’t feel that pull toward you or the need to be with you.”

Ryker nodded as his eyes looked down at the floor. “How can it be that I know you are my mate, but you don’t? I have never heard of this happening.”

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

Ryker would not look her in the eyes. He continued to look down at the floor as a painful silence filled the room. Ruby could hear Ryker’s heartbeat, and it was as erratic as hers felt.

“Ryker, you don’t have to keep this sanctuary safe alone. Scarlett and I can help with that. If I am your mate, that is my burden to share with you.”

His eyes were still looking straight at the floor. “How much training did you have with your wolf before you came here?”

Ruby let out a nervous laugh. “None. I only shifted for the first time just before I came here.”

Ryker finally looked at her. His eyes were wide, and they were rattling around inside his head as he tried to make sense of what she had just said to him.

“You were a freshly changed wolf… with no training… and took down two wolves who were trained in hand-to-hand combat and with their wolves for years?”

Ruby shrugged again. “Scarlett is badass.”

Hell yeah, I am.

“Your training starts tomorrow.”

Ryker turned around and started to walk out the door. “WAIT A GODDAMN SECOND!”

Ryker stopped and looked at her once more with his eyebrows raised. Ruby stood up and stomped over to him.

“Do you think you can just walk out of here while…” Ruby stopped mid-sentence to think of the best way to describe what was going on between her and Ryker but came up with nothing. “whatever this thing is between us hangs in the balance? Excuse the fuck out of me, but no. What the hell do you plan to do about having a mate bond with me?”

Ryker tucked a strand of hair behind her ear to remove it from covering her eye. “I plan to make sure that dickhead regrets the moment he rejected you.”

Then he stepped out and closed the door behind him. Ruby had no idea what that could mean, but apparently Ryker was done with the conversation.

He is so damn frustrating.

Frustratingly hot.

No, just frustrating.

Scarlett huffed at Ruby. Fight it all you want, but you know for fact that he is worth it.

Not sure about that.

He is worth it in bed, at least.

Ruby rolled her eyes and flung herself on the bed. She screamed into the mattress to let out her frustration at her supposed mate and then rolled onto her back.

Fine. If he wants to train me, I’ll let him. Then I am going to kick his ass and make him talk about this again.