17. Radley

After Grandma led me into the house, it took me ten minutes to stop crying. She pulled me onto the couch and into her arms, just like she did when I was a child. She rubs my back in soft circles until I can talk.

"Tell me what's going on, Radley."

I sit back, and she hands me a tissue. I mop my face up and try to think of where I should even begin. Did she know? My heart tells me no, but my brain is yelling at me not to trust anyone. "Dad isn't my dad. Did you know?"

"Of course not!"

"Some guy came into the diner and called me an omega. I messaged Mason, and they showed up, only to confirm what the guy was saying was true." I feel my chin start trembling again and have to fight against the tears. "They knew, and they didn't tell me."

"Would that be something you could have told them?"

"Are you taking their side?!" I jump from the couch and round on her.

"Radley," Grandma says slowly. "I'm not taking anyone's side. If the situation were reversed, could you tell one of them something like that?"

"But they…" I start pacing, trying to get my thoughts together. "I've been with them the past couple of days, and things…happened. They could have told me."

"Your mother should have told you," Grandma says angrily. "You can't put something like that on those boys. Have you called her?"

"And say what? Hey, Mom. I know you had sex with a wolf, and they must have been really strong because you made me. Oh, and does Dad know?"

"You need to ask her, Radley. You deserve answers."

"I don't know if I can." I sink back down on the edge of the couch, but my body feels weird. Like I have an itch that I can't scratch, and I'm burning up. "I feel something." I rub my chest, indicating where I feel it. "It's like something is trying to get out."

"I need to tell you something." Grandma scoots closer and grabs my hands. "Mason was here. He left right before you pulled up."

"What?"

"He's afraid that your wolf is going to manifest now. They can help you."

"I don't want to be anywhere near them."

"Look, I'm still not taking sides, but I think they deserve the chance to explain. And if your wolf is really going to make an appearance, you need them near you. They're your mates, Radley."

"Not if I reject the bond."

"You don't need to make that type of decision right now. For what it's worth, I truly believe those boys love you. They can help with the shift. I can't."

"I can fight it."

"This isn't something you can ignore. Call your mom, and then call Mason." The tone of her voice leaves no room for argument, so I pull my phone from my pocket. I stare at it for the longest time before I finally pull up Mom's number and dial.

"Radley, do you have any idea what time it is?" No hello, no nothing. I could be in trouble, and she's worried about it being too late.

"I do, but we need to talk."

"It can wait for the morning."

"No," I say sternly. "We're going to talk now."

"You don't talk to your mother that way. Call back when you can talk to me with respect."

"I know Dad isn't my dad," I blurt out before she can hang up. "I know the truth."

The line is silent, and I check to make sure she didn't hang up. Grandma gives me a smile of encouragement. "What are you talking about?"

"Please don't do this. I know, and I need you to tell me the truth."

"It was a long time ago, Radley. There's no use in bringing up the past."

"Bring up the past…are you kidding me? I just found out that my whole life was a damn lie, and you don't want to bring up the past? Quit the shit, Mom. Tell me the truth."

"I don't appreciate how you're talking to me."

"I don't appreciate being lied to, but here we are. Start talking."

Mom sighs, and I wait for her to hang up. When she doesn't, it actually surprises me. "Your dad was away on a business trip, and I met a man. He was handsome and charismatic. We had one night together, and I found out a few months later that I was pregnant with you."

"Who was he?"

"Just some man."

"Name. I want a name."

"I don't remember." Lie. I can hear the quiver in her voice and realize she's still lying to me.

"I'll find out one way or another, so you might as well tell me now."

"Daniel. I don't have a last name, and I haven't seen him since. He said he was just passing through."

"How did you meet him?"

"I used to go to this little pub on the edge of town after work, and he was there."

"Does Dad know?"

"Yes."

So much is making sense now. Mom's less than stellar way of raising me, and Dad's need to stay away all the time. I want to rage at her, but I know if I do, she'll stop talking. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't think there was any reason to tell you. How did you find out?"

"That's none of your business. Do you know anything else about Daniel?" I need to know if she knows about the wolves, but I can't come right out and ask her. "Anything important that I should know?"

"No." Another lie.

"Not that you care, but you won't be hearing from me for a while. I shouldn't have had to find out from someone else. You've had plenty of opportunities to find out who my real dad is."

"Your dad will always be your real dad. He raised you."

"He didn't, though. He was gone on business trips for the majority of my childhood, and now I know why. He didn't want to face you or me. You shut me out when you realized just how different I was. You knew this was just more than the Baxter family genes."

"There's things you don't need to know about, Radley."

"I already know!" That itchy feeling intensifies, and my hand tightens on the phone. "I'm right in the middle of it all. You suppressed who I really was because of what reason? Jealousy? Shame? What is it, Mom? What made you hate me so much?"

"I don't hate you. You just never felt like mine."

"Well, you got your wish. I'm not yours. You're free of me, Mom."

I hang up before I can say anything else. My breathing speeds up, and Grandma's eyes widen. "Radley, your eyes are glowing."

"I can't stop it." My voice comes out weird, and I jump from the couch to run outside. I pace, trying to get a hold of whatever is about to happen. I hear Grandma talking rapidly to someone, and I already know who she called. "Grandma!"

She rushes out of the house but keeps her distance. "They're on their way. Let them help you."

My back bows and a scream rips from my mouth. I feel like someone is cracking my spine one vertebrae at a time. "It hurts!" I cry.

"Breathe, Radley. Let your nature take over."

"I'm so scared." I drop to my knees, my hand landing in the dirt. I claw at it when that same pain rips through my shoulder blade. "I can't do this."

"Yes, you can. You're strong. Stop fighting against it."

Both hands slap down in the dirt, and my jaw twists in a weird way. I close my eyes and focus on anything but the pain. Mason, Nash, and Bryce's faces flash behind my eyes, and I take a deep breath. No matter how upset I am with them, they instantly calm me, so I focus on Bryce's sweet smile. That centers me, and I feel my wolf right on the edge. I reach out to her and gasp when I see her. Her coat is a beautiful rust color, but her eyes are yellow instead of red. She shakes her fur out, and it looks so inviting that I let my body take over. I hear the sound of thundering paws and know the guys are trying to get to me. I welcome it because I can feel the bond getting even stronger. Someone"s thoughts are running through my head at lightning speed, but I can't concentrate on it to figure out who it is. I finally open my eyes, and my vision has sharpened. I can see everything in such vivid detail. My nose is also stronger, and I can smell fear and pride rolling off of Grandma. She's not scared of me. She's scared for me. The pain rips down my spine again, and it jerks me back out of the vision of my wolf. I scream so loud that it echoes all around me.

I broke my arm when I was in third grade. It snapped in half, and this is a million times worse. Every bone feels like it's breaking one at a time. I want to curl in a ball, but I can't stop it.

This is torture.