Chapter 8

Makayla

When he arrives, I'm wearing the sluttiest damned lingerie I could find. I mean, it's not elegant and sweet. It may as well have come with big neon signs. Put Your Dick Here!!! It's vinyl but not in a master/servant shade of gray way. It's a red vinyl jumper, kind of. Anyway, it's skin-tight except my breasts are uncovered. There is a strip of uncovered area between my legs that essentially gives Daniel access to my pussy or my ass. I don't have one of those BDSM hoods but I do have my hair pulled back in a severe ponytail and my lips are painted very deep and wet red. He knows he gets that hole, too.

And today, I'm giving him my backdoor. I've never given it to him before (or anyone, I guess) and I want him to have it. It's day thirty, and I want him to go out with a very specific kind of bang.

Actually, I guess I don't want him to have it, not really. I mean, it's pretty frightening. I want him to know, however, that it's one more thing he gets from me. It's one more thing that will be available to him if he doesn't end things with me. I don't want him to go out with a bang at all. I want him to stay in a relationship where he can bang me any way he wants. He can have my mouth, my pussy, and my ass all he wants and all he has to do to enjoy that is to enjoy it. Maybe in six months or so, I'll surprise him with another girl. I have a college girlfriend who tried to get me to do a threesome with her several times. Maybe she'll do it.

"Wow," he says.

I smile at him and say, "I bought this just for you." I say. I'm nervous, though, because the way his voice sounds seems off to me, like it's not the kind of wow you want your man to say if he sees you in a sexy outfit. I drive that thought from my mind and sway my way toward him. He seems a little stiff but he's often like that after work. I lift myself up on tiptoes and kiss his ear before I say, "And you get to bend me over and have my virgin ass today, Baby."

"All right," he says almost sternly. "This isn't working. This just isn't working."

My heart sinks and I feel like I'm going to die. "But don't you want to have the tightest hole I've…"

"Damn it, Mackie, stop!" His tone of voice is shockingly stern and shockingly powerful as well. I think this is the first time I've ever actually been afraid of him. I mean, I don't think this man will hurt me. Of course not. He's still scary right now, though. He stares at me and I can see the anger in his eyes. "I don't mean this relationship isn't working," he says, "I mean that…"

"But I can make the relationship work," I plead, "I can change. I'll do anything you want me..."

"Mackie, shut up and listen to me!" He snaps.

I'm a fucking idiot because him snapping at me like this really, really turns me on. I don't know why. The control, I guess. I look at him and say, "But I… wait… wait… did you say you don't think the relationship isn't working?"

"And now," he says, "you keep your mouth shut and listen for a little while so that you'll hear the rest of what I'm trying to say. Understand?"

I nod as I stare at him in wonder. The relationship is working for him?

"The relationship is working for me," he says. He sounds almost dark and upset about that. "So, well that I can't give you up even if keeping you is unfair to you."

"It's not unfair!" I say.

"I said hush up," he says.

"Well, I'll hush when you don't act like you get to decide what's fair or unfair to me without asking my opinion on the subject, how's that?"

"See, that right there is what I'm talking about," he says. "That's why this isn't working."

"I'm not allowed to…" he holds up a hand and I shut up.

"That's my Makayla," he says, "the one who wouldn't let me decide for her what she wants. That's the Mackie I love. That's my girl. My girl isn't the one who spends all her time finding new ways to prove she's going to please me emotionally, physically, and in every other way possible. She's not the girl who's going to do that without ever expecting anything from me other than my presence and my dick. My girl isn't the one who offers up her ass when she doesn't really want to give it. I want you, Mackie. I don't want the fucking porn star whore you're trying to be for me."

This is the strangest damned thing on Earth. Everything about his tone tells me I should be offended. He also called me a porn star whore, didn't he? But my head focuses on only one part. "You… you love me?"

"Of course I love you!" he says angrily. "Why the hell do you think I have such an impossible time resisting you? It isn't because of all the fucking orgasms. I'm so wrapped up in you that I can't even…"

Well, he shuts up because I'm kissing him hard and my arms are around him. Who the hell could have guessed that what I needed to do to have him was to stop trying? As I kiss him, the certainty that there's something special about me returns. I wonder if maybe this whole destiny idea, his mystical thought about my life being magical or something, is just me wrapped up in my love for him.

Sounds pretty good to me.