Chapter Eight

No one was speaking to her.

With the exception of Davina and Helen, none of the ladies would speak to Mira, nor had they since yesterday. There was a pre-scheduled trip into the town of Axminster on this fine morning, part of their education on bartering and trade, and Mira chose to ride a palfrey rather than ride in the carriage with the rest of the ladies. If they were going to ignore her, then she wasn’t going to give them the satisfaction of knowing how much it hurt her feelings.

She’d rather be alone.

It had started yesterday after Douglas’ dazzling display of chivalry for all to see. As he’d told Mira, he did it so the young women who had been lusting after him would finally leave him alone. He’d done it to save his own skin, but what he didn’t anticipate was how they would turn on Mira. Douglas’ only hope was that he would be left alone, as he had bluntly put it to Isabel, so he could piss in peace. He had staked his claim on Mira and instead of respecting those boundaries, all of that unrequited lust focused on him had turned dark and ugly against Mira.

The feast the previous night was where it had started. At first, Davina was the only one who would speak to Mira, and she told her what had happened and how the Astoria had reacted to Douglas’ gesture. Helen had joined them at one point and told more tales of Astoria being hysterical that Douglas had chosen Mira and how she had convinced the younger girls that they were not to speak to Mira. Using Astoria’s logic, Mira had seduced Douglas and she was a trollop, and the younger women were convinced that they didn’t want to associate with the trollop. Astoria threatened to tell their families if they did.

Because she shared a chamber with the older girls, Mira had to sleep a few feet away from Astoria that night.

She wished she had the courage to smother her with a pillow.

Rather than sit and sulk, she was angry. Mira was angry with Astoria and the girls, angry with Douglas that he’d pulled her into this. The entire ride into the town, which wasn’t terribly far, he’d ridden at the head of the escort. He’d never looked at her once. But he’d helped her mount her palfrey back at Axminster Castle, and when he smiled at her, she’d turned her nose up at him.

Now, they were heading into the heart of Axminster’s market district. The city had a license to hold a market every fifth day of the month and Mira had been here many times as a result. She was particularly good at bartering for goods, but she suspected Lady Isabel would do it this time. Isabel was on a palfrey of her own, up near the front where Douglas was, while Mira rode at the rear with about ten other soldiers—staying to the rear away from Douglas and the girls who were angry with her.

She didn’t care in the least.

Not much, anyway.

Axminster’s market was set up in an enormous square with dozens and dozens of stalls from farmers, craftsmen, and more. The dust of summer was kicked up once again as the party from the castle headed into the thick of the city. Douglas was directing the escort off to the side, where a big English oak provided shade for the horses, and the carriage had been pulled aside as well. Jonathan and Davyss, who had been riding in the rear near Mira, helped the ladies from the carriage while one of the soldiers helped her dismount.

But she waited.

She wanted to see how Isabel was going to organize the young women before she joined them. Davina kept waving her over, but she wouldn’t go until she saw Douglas heading in her direction. Given that she didn’t want to speak with him at all, she joined Davina and Helen, steering clear of Astoria and her little group. When Isabel joined them, Mira took a step and pretended to twist her ankle. She took on a noticeable limp until Isabel told her to stay with the carriage, which was exactly what she wanted. Watching Isabel and Eric, followed by Davyss and Jonathan, lead the young women away, she waited until they were completely gone before turning for the carriage.

Douglas was standing behind her.

“Oh!” Mira gasped because she’d nearly plowed into him. “You startled me.”

Douglas’ focused lingered on her, those sky-blue eyes appraising. “You and I must speak,” he said quietly. Then he held out a hand to her. “Did you really hurt your ankle? Do you need assistance?”

Mira shook her head firmly. “If I did, I would not take it from you,” she said. “You want to speak? Then let us speak. You have caused a great deal of trouble for me, Douglas de Lohr, and I am not happy about it.”

He sighed. “I know,” he said. “And I am very sorry for that. I had no way of knowing those that profess their undying love for me would turn their jealousy upon you.”

“They have,” she said. “Unintentional or not, I am not going to continue with this farce any longer. I must live with these girls, and if they are ostracizing me, I am useless to Lady Isabel.”

“That is not true.”

“It is,” she snapped. “Douglas, I have nowhere else to go if Lady Isabel decides I am ineffective in my duties because all of the girls are jealous. I cannot go home because of the situation there with my stepfather and stepsister. I have told you about that.”

She was venting on him and he knew it. Contritely, he stood there and took it. “I know,” he said softly. “As I said, I am very sorry.”

That wasn’t good enough for Mira. She threw her arm in the direction of the marketplace, pointing. “Mayhap you are,” she said. “But if you do not have a good plan to get me out of this mess with those girls, then I will take matters into my own hands. I must keep this position or I will be homeless and destitute.”

He shook his head. “You will not be, I promise,” he said quietly. “I will send you to Lioncross and you can serve my mother.”

That threw some water on her fiery temper. “You… you what?” she said. “Send me to Lioncross?”

“Aye.”

“But that’s madness.”

“Why?”

“Because I have no ties there,” she said as if he were daft. “You would simply thrust me upon your mother and insist she permit me to serve her? She would tell you to jump in the lake.”

He fought off a smile. “How would you know what she would say?” he said. “You do not know my mother.”

“I know you, and that is all I need to know about anyone in your family,” she said, rolling her eyes and moving away from him. “I am not going to be a burden on your mother, Douglas. You were generous to suggest it, but it will not work. Forget it.”

He watched her as she climbed, agitated, into the carriage. After a moment’s pause, he followed.

“Lady Mira, I am not sure what more I can say,” he said. “I have apologized for misjudging the repercussions of my action. I have apologized that you must bear the brunt of it. I have offered to find you a position should Lady Isabel decide you are no longer suited to whatever it is you do for her, but you reject everything I say. Therefore, I will suggest one last thing and our agreement may be ended. When the ladies return from the market for the journey home, I give you permission to publicly humiliate me and tell me that you are not interested in me. You may do this in full view of the ladies. Since you need their support and admiration and you clearly do not want or need mine, that should put you back in their good graces. After that, I will not trouble you further.”

Mira was surprised that he’d suggest such a thing. To humiliate an elite knight in public was most definitely a serious matter. Yesterday they’d made a bargain, and even she thought it might work. It wasn’t his fault. But she was blaming him for her misery.

Misery.

That was her name, after all.

“Stop being such a martyr,” she finally said, backing down a little. “We had a bargain and we are sticking to it, no matter how it has come back on me. It wasn’t your fault. You did not do it deliberately.”

Douglas felt a good deal of relief that she wasn’t truly furious with him. He leaned against the carriage, his eyes twinkling at her.

“I really am sorry,” he said quietly, a smile on his lips. “But my offer stands—if you must break our pretend engagement in front of them, I will understand.”

They were fairly close together, her face about a foot from his. She looked at him, unable to be irritated in the face of his impish expression. He was so devilish that it was both endearing and irritating at the same time, and in spite of herself, she broke down in a grin.

“I should punish you by forcing you to marry me,” she said. “That will teach you not to make bargains like this. You will have to explain it all to your parents, and I am certain they would be very angry with you for such a deception.”

He shrugged. “Mayhap I will marry you anyway,” he said. “I do not need to be forced into it. And my parents would be delighted.”

She chuckled and sat back in the chair. “Of course they would,” she said sarcastically. “Douglas de Lohr, the fifth son of the Earl of Hereford and Worcester, marrying a woman with a small dowry and no property. They would chain you up and beat you until you regained your senses.”

He winced. “Ouch,” he said. “That is too painful. Besides, my father is not the beating kind, nor is my mother. You will like them when you meet them.”

She scowled. “Meet them?” she repeated. “I do not think the earl and the countess and I travel in the same social circles.”

“It does not matter,” he said, moving away from the carriage, distracted by something down the avenue. “When you are my wife, we will all be of the same social standing.”

Mira watched him, sensing that he was no longer jesting. He seemed quite serious and she didn’t like it.

“Stop,” she said quietly. “You go too far.”

He took his gaze off whatever he was seeing down the avenue and looked at her. “Too far with what?”

“Stop talking like this marriage is real,” she said. “I will pretend with you, but I am not going to act as if this is truly going to happen, so please stop speaking that way.”

He cocked his head. “Don’t you like me?”

“I like you very much.”

“Enough to marry me?”

“I told you to stop it.”

He grinned and shook his head. “Stop what?” he said. “I am serious, Mira. You need a husband and, as my mother has pointed out many times, I need a wife. What is wrong with me that you should not wish to marry me?”

She looked at him in shock. Shock that was quickly turning to frustration. “You’re serious.”

“I am.”

Her eyes narrowed. “I told you that I am not a viable marriage prospect,” she said. “Why on earth would you want to marry someone like me?”

His grin widened. “Because I like you,” he said. “I liked you the moment I first saw you. I like your beautiful hair, your beautiful eyes. You are a small, fragile-looking woman but you are anything but fragile. I think you are stronger than I am in many ways. You are a rare bird, Lady Misery Isabella Rosalie d’Avignon. Pretending we are in love has made me want to be in love. Why not be in love with you?”

Her eyes widened. “Oh… Douglas,” she breathed. “You cannot be serious.”

“Why not?”

“Are you telling me that you’ve fallen for your own deception?”

He shook his head. “The only thing I’ve fallen for is you.”

“What are you saying?”

He shrugged those big shoulders. “I suppose I should explain myself,” he said. “I’m trying to make this seem like a normal and natural thing that we’ve both been expecting when the truth is that I cannot explain it at all. My father has always called me the wise one. He says I have an old soul. I do not act on whims and I do not make decisions that I will regret later. Every decision I make, no matter how small, is sound. The idea of marrying you… It has just come to me, that is true, but the more I think about it, the more I like the idea. I was attracted to you the moment I first met you and that feeling has only grown stronger.”

Mira was sitting back against the carriage seat, looking at him in astonishment. In fact, she was rather leaning away from him as if afraid she was going to catch whatever madness had infected him. But she was also jolted by the possibility that he might actually be serious. He said he was. He was acting as if he was.

She was absolutely speechless.

“I do not know what to say to that,” she finally said.

He was struggling not to feel embarrassed by a declaration of his intentions that seemed to come out of nowhere. As he’d told her, he hadn’t planned it. He’d also told her that he didn’t act on whims, but this certainly seemed like one. A reasonable whim. But one that felt right.

He endeavored not to feel vulnerable about it.

“You could start by telling me if there is any interest on your part,” he said. “If being married to me, if being the mother to my sons, is of no interest to you, then you only need tell me once and I’ll not ask again.”

She just looked at him. Nothing seemed to be coming forth. She simply stared at him with those green eyes that were pale and bright, an unearthly color that seemed to burrow down deep into him. He hadn’t even realized that until now.

Now, something was changing between them.

Something was happening.

When the wait became excessive, Douglas turned around and began to walk away. He couldn’t stand there with her staring at him and not have the answer he wanted. He would have to accept the fact that her silence was the answer. All of this was happening too fast. It was too sudden. He’d made a fool out of himself and he was embarrassed. But he couldn’t leave her alone in that carriage, so he was heading over to tell the soldiers who had remained to guard the horses to keep an eye on her when he heard her voice behind him.

“Douglas?”

By the time he stopped and turned around, she was nearly upon him. She had climbed out of the carriage and followed him. It was difficult not to be on his guard as he faced her.

“What is it?”

She was staring at him again, and he almost asked her the same question again, but she broke from whatever trance she was in. Somehow, she couldn’t seem to stop staring at him, as if trying to figure out if this was all real. If he truly meant what he said. Even though he’d told her he was serious, she was having trouble grasping it.

Her expression was full of questions.

And perhaps a little fear.

“You must understand something,” she said, her voice quivering. “I have never, in my life, heard those words where they pertained to me. I never imagined I would.”

He was a little less embarrassed by her confession, but not by much. “And I never imagined I would say them,” he said, folding his enormous arms over his chest and averting his gaze. “Contrary to what you might think, this was not easy for me.”

“I believe it. How do you feel now that you have said it?”

He was still looking away, but he started to chuckle. “I am not certain yet,” he said. “It all depends on how you intend to answer.”

“Might I have time to think on it?”

He nodded. “Aye,” he said, turning to look at her again. “I do not expect an answer today or tomorrow or even a month from now. It is an important question that should be taken seriously. But I would like to ask you one more.”

“What is it?”

“Is there anything about me that you like, Mira?”

“There is everything about you that I like, Douglas.”

He couldn’t keep the grin off his face at her frank reply. There had been no hesitation. “Ah,” he said, now feeling the least bit giddy. And nervous. “I see. Then… then that is a fine answer. I am satisfied.”

Mira was starting to laugh because he seemed rather twitchy now that she’d eased his mind a little. “You had better take me into town and buy me something to eat,” she told him. “And probably to drink. I think I need it.”

“I think I do, too.”

“Shall we go?”

“If I offer you my elbow, will you take it?”

Giving him a look of exaggerated exasperation, she grabbed his elbow and pulled him toward the main avenue. “Come along, my impetuous lad,” she said. “We are going to eat well and we are going to speak more about this proposal you have given me.”

“Before or after we get drunk?”

She grunted in response. “You are impossible.”

He smiled down at her, his long blond hair draping over one eye. “I am quite possible, my lady,” he said. “I intend to show you just how possible.”

Grinning, Mira met his eye for a moment before looking away, unable to hold his gaze. Her breathing was coming in quick gasps and her heart was thumping strangely in her chest, all signs of madness, she was sure.

But a good kind of madness.

Something that had started off as a pretense had turned into something else.

*

“And then I am going to annex all of Norfolk. It should all be under one house, and that house will be de Winter. When I am the head of the house, it will be the most powerful in England.”

Jonathan had been watching Douglas and Lady Mira in the distance as they skirted the market and headed toward the north side of the city, but he was listening to Davyss de Winter spout his plans of grandeur. Truthfully, almost since the moment Douglas had taken up residence at Axminster, young Davyss was lauding his plans for the de Winter empire when he came to power.

And what plans they were.

As the heirs to the Earldom of Radnor, the de Winter family owned practically all of Radnorshire, but they also had deep ties to Norfolk. Great swaths of the shire belonged to the House of de Warenne, the Lords of Surrey, and Davyss’ mother was the sister of the current Earl of Surrey. Lady Katherine de Winter was more powerful that her brother and certainly more formidable. She had a son who thought just like her. A big, strapping, powerful, talented son who was a full-fledged knight at least two years before he should have been.

Jonathan had to grin at the ambitious Davyss.

“Who are you going to annex?” he asked. “Bigod’s properties? If you try, you will not keep him as an ally.”

Davyss knew that. He knew all of it, fundamentally, but he had a big ego and a big mouth. “Mayhap I will marry one of their ugly daughters,” he said. “That would join our families, and when Bigod dies, I will step into his place.”

“He has a nephew, Davyss,” Jonathan said in a low voice. “And I take exception to your calling Bigod women ugly.”

That brought Davyss pause. He and Jonathan had served together for some time and he’d known the man most of his life. He knew why Jonathan, an elite, Blackchurch-trained knight, was now languishing at Axminster when he should be out leading armies. Davyss’ callous comment touched on that very thing.

“I did not mean all of them,” he said. “Forgive me, Wolfie. That was a careless thing to say.”

Jonathan waved him off, as if none of it mattered. “Go on,” he said. “Finish telling me how you will make one great de Winter empire and force the end of the Bigod dynasty.”

It was the first time since reaching the marketplace that Davyss had stopped talking. Or at least took a breath before he continued. His comment about Bigod women had slowed him down, and he was genuinely contrite about it. As Lady Isabel and her women stood over near a man who sold exotic fabrics from all over the world, Davyss and Jonathan were on guard several feet away. Eric had gone off, somewhere, so it was just the two of them.

Davyss’ attention shifted from his boasting to Jonathan.

“I’m sure you are weary of listening to me boast,” he said. “I’ve not had the chance to tell you how sorry I am that you ended up at Axminster. You know my father offered to speak to Bigod on your behalf. You do not have to stay here.”

Jonathan held up a gloved hand to silence him. “I know,” he said. “And I appreciate it. But it seems that we are at an end.”

“Just because he thinks you seduced his niece?”

“I did seduce her.”

“Because you’re in love with the girl,” Davyss said. “Everyone knows that.”

Jonathan took a deep breath, trying to shake off the pain that the subject provoked. “It does not matter anymore,” he said. “I was foolish to have pursued her. She was meant for someone else and I knew that from the start.”

Davyss was watching him as he pretended not to care when the truth was that he cared a great deal. Jonathan and Lady Elizabeth Bigod was a subject of gossip up through the king’s court, something that embarrassed his brother, the Earl of Wolverhampton, but the king had been surprisingly sympathetic.

Roger Bigod, however, was not.

“She was in a contract marriage with an old man,” Davyss pointed out with disgust. “Bigod wanted his niece to marry the Flemish warlord simply for the money and military support when the truth was that she would have been much better off with a de Wolfe.”

“Davyss, please.”

Davyss knew he should shut up, but the entire situation had him outraged. “Lady Elizabeth loved you, Wolfie,” he said, slamming a gloved fist into an open palm. “She should have been allowed to marry the man she loved, but instead, Bigod tossed her into a ship and sent her across the sea to her betrothed when he discovered your affair, and he is punishing you by sending you to do menial work. It simply isn’t fair.”

“Fair or not, that is his decision.”

Davyss couldn’t understand why Jonathan was being so blasé about it. “You should go back to Warstone Castle and serve your brother,” he said. “Mayhap that is where you belong, on the Welsh marches where you can be of better use instead of wasting away in Norfolk’s arsenal.”

Jonathan caught sight of Eric as the man headed toward them from the northern side of the city where he’d evidently been. “If you want to know the truth, I have already considered that,” he said. “I might go home again. Or I might ask Douglas if I can accompany him back to Lioncross Abbey.”

“Your brother would not be disappointed if you did not go home?”

Jonathan smiled thinly. “I take orders much better from others,” he said. “No one likes to have your brother ordering you about, especially since we are twins and it is only by virtue of my birth order that I am not the earl.”

Davyss could see his point. “I’ve never met your brother,” he said. “Does he look like you?”

Jonathan shook his head. “Nay,” he said. “We have the same coloring, but Robert is shorter than I am. He is a trained knight, but he was better at diplomacy like our father was. He was never a warrior.”

“But your younger brother is.”

“William is a god. You know that.”

Davyss grinned. “I’ve not met him, either.”

“Pray it is not in battle, for you, young de Winter, would lose.”

Davyss chuckled, patting the gorgeous broadsword strapped to his side. Lespada, it was called, the hereditary weapon of every firstborn male in his family line. The sword was well over one hundred years old, but it looked new from the good care it had been given.

“Nothing can defeat Lespada,” he said confidently. “Not even your great brother.”

Jonathan lifted an eyebrow. “You think so, do you?” he said. “I would like to see that. Should I arrange it?”

Davyss looked away, pretending to be uninterested. Of course he wasn’t willing to fight the great William de Wolfe. But it was easy to be brave when he was hundreds of miles away from the man. No chance of running into him.

Unless his brother arranged it.

“Why waste our time?” he said. “Look; there’s le Kerque. I wonder where he went?”

Jonathan grinned at Davyss’ change in subject. “I do not know,” he said. “But I have a need to speak to him.”

With Davyss standing guard as the women continued to barter, Jonathan made his way over to Eric, who was carrying a sack of something in his arms. He intercepted Eric before he could get to the women.

“Le Kerque,” he said. “I wanted a moment to speak with you, but we’ve not had the chance since leaving the castle. Can you spare a moment?”

Eric nodded, shifting the sack in his arms. “Of course,” he said. “What is it?”

Jonathan lowered his voice. “Yesterday when I was instructing the men,” he said, “I was incredibly disrespectful to you, and I would like to apologize for that. I have no excuse other than I was frustrated at the time and let it show. It will not happen again.”

Eric clearly hadn’t been expecting the apology. After a moment, he smiled. “Unnecessary, de Wolfe,” he said. “You were correct. I do hold my sword poorly.”

“You hold it in a way that is comfortable to you. I should not judge that.”

“You were right in instructing the men not to hold it that way.”

“I am certain they would take sword instruction from you quite readily.”

Eric’s smile faded. “Nay,” he said. “I do not teach that any longer. I have not in some time.”

“May I ask why?” Jonathan asked. “Because of an old injury? I know you used to serve Henry, long ago.”

“How did you know that?”

“I heard one of the men speaking about it.”

Eric’s gaze lingered on him for a moment as his mood began to sour. “Nay,” he said. “No injury. I am certain a man like you, a Blackchurch knight, would not understand, but not all of us are as strong as you are. I was badly injured in battle years ago, and since then I cannot bear to pick up a sword. I have not fought in a battle since that time.”

Jonathan frowned. “But you were part of the siege of Axminster,” he said. “I saw you on the wall.”

“Giving orders only,” Eric said quietly. “I tell men what to do. I simply do not lead by example. That is why my sergeants give the men weapons training. If I try to pick up a sword, I break into a sweat. I am not proud of it, but it is the way of things. I’m sure you can imagine how humiliating it is to have you and de Lohr here, protecting a castle I should be more than capable of protecting.”

Jonathan could see that they were on a sensitive subject so he simply shook his head. “We are simply here to help,” he said. “I swear that we never intended to humiliate you.”

Eric shrugged as if he didn’t quite believe that. “It is what Hereford wanted, anyway,” he said. “But your apology is noted. You did not have to do it. I did not expect you to.”

“Why not?”

“Because why would a knight like you apologize to a knight like me? I am beneath such things.”

Jonathan frowned, preparing to deny that statement, but Isabel caught sight of Eric and called to him. He quickly excused himself, going to Isabel, who took the sack from him. She peered into it and, delighted, began pulling out fat purple plums. She began handing them out to her ladies as Jonathan watched, realizing that le Kerque had been reduced to a figurehead, a messenger, a servant to Lady Isabel, and little else because of his fear of weapons. Jonathan had seen men like that before, men who had a brush with death and found the prospect of facing it again terrifying.

A sad situation, indeed.

Pondering that very thing, he slowly made his way back over to Davyss, wondering if he could possibly help le Kerque. He planned to tell Douglas what the man had told him, and perhaps together they could figure something out. He had just reached Davyss, who was commenting on the fact that he, too, wanted one of those giant plums, when Eric was suddenly in their midst.

“Listen to me,” he hissed. “Off to your left, near the intersection of the main road and another avenue that leads to the church, are several Tatworth men. I have already suggested to Lady Isabel that she start moving her women back to the escort.”

Jonathan and Davyss immediately looked over at the indicated area. There were crowds of people all around, including merchants and their stalls, so it was difficult to get a clear field of vision. However, they could see a group of men standing near a corner, men who seemed to be having a lively conversation.

“That group over there?” Jonathan asked. “There are seven of them, I think.”

“Aye,” Eric said, spying the same men. “I recognize at least four of them. They usually escorted Rickard Tatworth on his visits to Axminster.”

Jonathan could see that the men were armed. “They are not wearing Tatworth standards,” he said. “Curtis disbanded the entire army. Half went with him and half with de Winter, so who are those men?”

“Knights,” Eric said. He was clearly nervous. “Leominster may have taken the soldiers, but he clearly did not take the knights.”

“Will they know Lady Isabel on sight?”

“They will.”

“Damn,” Jonathan growled. “Eric, you and Davyss move her and the ladies quickly. There is no time to waste. Get them back to the escort and start moving out. Do not wait for me.”

They were already moving, with Jonathan practically pushing Eric in the direction of the women. “Where are you going?” Eric asked.

“To find Douglas,” Jonathan said. “He is wearing a de Lohr tunic, and if they see him, they might confront him.”

“Isn’t he back with the escort?” Eric asked.

Jonathan shook his head. “I saw him and Lady Mira head off toward the north, where the bakers are,” he said, indicating the edge of the market because the escort was on the other side, tucked under the trees. “Go, now. Get back to the castle.”

Davyss was already running up ahead where the women were scurrying back to the escort. Eric was on his heels, and Jonathan, keeping an eye on the Tatworth men, tried to stay lost in the crowd as he headed in the direction he’d seen Douglas and Mira go. He, too, was wearing a standard of the army that defeated Tatworth, so he was trying to stay hidden.

He had to find Douglas.