26. Decisions

26

DECISIONS

A s Lucca arrives in Rome, a wave of relief fills my heart. He kisses me, and I never knew so much emotion could possess me as I kiss him back like mad, feeling something deep inside me become whole. Ariana joins us at the doors and Lucca and I corral her into our arms, kissing her lips, then each other’s again. Light blazes into my world, and strength as I revel in my bound lovers. I remember suddenly that I am Dark Fae rather than just Vampire, and something impossibly bright sings inside me.

The Music of the Spheres rising between us with a joyful sound now, in a way it’s never quite done before.

“Quinn!” Lucca heaves a deep breath, as relieved as I am in this moment. “Thank all the gods you’re okay. I thought we had lost you!”

“I’m here. I’m alright, Lucca,” I say to him, though I say it as much to myself as I pull him close, not kissing any longer but simply embracing him. I cup my hand behind his head, cradling him to me. As Lucca’s heart beats against my chest, so strong and fast to be with us once more, mine does as well .

Ariana’s echoing it, as the third and most important part of our trio curls around us both.

“Lucca! Are you all right?” Ariana asks as she glances up at him, none of us relinquishing our embrace by the doors. “I felt how much power you gave us to return Quinn when he went Revenant… but then I couldn’t feel you, couldn’t connect to you after that. What happened?”

“I passed out.” Lucca gives a wry chuckle as he pulls back from my embrace, nuzzling his lips over Ariana’s. “I gave so much to you and Quinn during that surge, I passed out and had to be revived by Alleno, Devi, and Lady Eiseth. Fortunately, they were there with me and could help. Just as they’re here now, downstairs talking with Arturos. We’re all ready to help with whatever you want to do, Quinn. All except Devi, of course. She’s back in Florence protecting the Dark Haven with Curio, as you asked. Your answer is going to affect us all, however, so we need to talk and figure things out—what we’re going to do next.”

“Lucca,” I say, realizing so much more is at stake now than I previously thought, and I need to fill him in on it immediately. “You have to know, I’m not a Vampire, not like I thought. All these years, ever since we went hunting Dark Fae?—”

“We actually became Dark Fae.” Something reckless and beautiful lights Lucca’s summer-blue eyes now as he chuckles. “I know, Quinn. Alleno, Devi, and Lady Eiseth told me last night. They told me about you, too. Which is why everyone is downstairs right now. Because they are Dark Fae, as well. And the fate of all our futures depends on what you decide to do next. With the Vampire Council of Rome.”

I blink at him as my entire world suddenly floods with new understanding. As that revelation hits me, light fills me in a way I’ve not known since I went into the Revenant catacomb that fateful night with Lucca.

I feel it illuminate me as something new comes into my heart. That light beams from me and I feel it fill Ariana and Lucca also as diamond-bright rainbows suddenly shed off Lucca, and darker, more haunting ones simmer off Ariana. Darkfire blazes around me with my Fae light now; my Vampire powers strengthen as my Dark Fae magic revels in this new discovery.

That my strongest allies—and Lucca’s, too—have been Dark Fae all along.

“Hidden in plain sight.” I understand as everything I ever knew about my world suddenly changes. In an instant, everything shifts—and I know why everyone has gathered here now to find out what I’m going to do in Rome, because it affects them as Dark Fae.

But though I was elated from my previous discovery about my allies and the massive strength they might possess as Dark Fae, a new thought hits me.

And in a moment, my entire life crumbles.

Leaving me with nothing.

“I can’t hold a seat on the Vampire Council. I can never sit among them and champion the progress and modernity I had so hoped to accomplish in Vampire society.”

As the deepest ambition of my life suddenly fractures, Lucca and Ariana cuddle around me, gripping me tight. I know they both feel what just happened inside me. Because all my ambitions and intricate plans are shattered now, leaving only a hole of darkness within.

I am beyond stunned as Lucca steps back, frowning at me and holding my shoulders. Ariana hovers at my side, one arm wrapped around me as I feel her fret. Because I’m not just churning, not like I would normally do when faced with a giant hole in one of my plots. I suddenly feel empty, as everything I ever was and ever hoped to be is yanked out from underneath me.

All hope lost.

“There’s no point. No point to any of this anymore.” I draw slowly back from them both now, needing to process this on my own. Turning, I go to the tall windows of Arturos’ villa, staring out over the settling night.

It looks so beautiful and I revel in it—and understand for the first time in my life what I’m truly doing. All this time, I’ve surrounded myself with beauty, sensuality, and art because of how it made me feel. Little did I know I was actually building my power, increasing it with every painting I admired, every piece of music I devoured with enjoyment, and every fine cordial or wine I created for the Dark Haven of Florence.

I reveled in it all—and it made my Dark Fae power stronger.

It hadn’t just strengthened my Night, I understand now, but my Light as well. Now that I no longer have a place in Vampire society, however, I have no idea what to do with that. I feel more than hear Eiseth, Arturos, and Alleno enter the room, as if summoned by Lucca to help me address my current state. I don’t turn from the windows, but let them all find a place to settle as they decide what to do with me.

As I feel empty for the first time in my life—not knowing what to do with myself.

“Quinn. Being a Dark Fae is not a death sentence to your ambitions with the Vampire Council.” Eiseth is the first to speak, interrupting my thoughts with her smooth alto voice as if she knows what I’m going through.

As if she went through it herself long ago, when she discovered what she was.

“How does the Council not know what you are, Eiseth?” I ask her now as I stare out over the evening grounds, empty but listening to whatever solace she thinks she can provide.

“Careful misdirection with my power, over time.” She is honest—and for the first time, I know why I can hear truth in people’s words, and falsehoods with my magic.

My Dark Fae magic.

Just like Ariana’s.

“All of us Dark Fae who masquerade as Vampire do this with our power, Quinn,” Eiseth says as she continues. “For generations, we Dark Fae who live as Vampires have put out misdirection that the unique abilities our power contains are nothing more than odd leftovers from when we were Fae. The Vampires have believed us. And we kept our Light under wraps… never giving them reason not to. Lest they discover us and oust us from their society when we could do so much good among them.”

“Explain.” I am sharp now, needing the full truth from my allies tonight, when they have held back so much.

“Dark Fae have held positions of power in both Fae and Vampire society for generations, Valerio,” Alleno says, using my old Fae name to make certain I pay attention. It feels strange now as I roll it silently around my mouth.

Knowing that name is not entirely gone from me—now that I’m Dark Fae.

“The Darkwatch was founded by Dark Fae, way back when,” Alleno says as I feel him and Lucca exchange a glance. “It’s a secret none are told, save for those who are already Dark Fae in that organization. We have a silent history neither Vampires nor Fae know about—that we’ve held positions of honor and influence in both cultures, for eons. We do so, and fight to bring the Night and the Light back together again. As they once were in the Ascendants of old.”

“To subsume both Vampires and Fae into the Dark Fae, so only one species exists?” I turn now, pinning Alleno with my gaze.

“No. To allow all three cultures to live in harmony together.” Eiseth skewers me with her intense gaze. “We seek for all to be able to decide whether they wish to live in the Night, the Light, or both. For all three Lineages are not so very different, as you yourself have expounded for ages, Quinn. A truth you knew to your bones—long before you understood what you really are.”

“Equality. Harmony. Cooperative sovereignty,” I say, orating ideals I’ve long held in my deepest heart of hearts—that the Vampires, Fae, and Dark Fae could find a balance together and no longer be at each other’s throats like they have been for eons.

“Ever since we Fell.”

The words drop from my lips unbidden, but I know them suddenly as true. Something deep inside me yearns for all of us Fae, Dark Fae, and Vampires to return to our original, sublime state—the state the Ascendents were in just after they Fell to earth.

It was the power we had when our magic was complete, before it became fractured into the Light and the Night. I take a deep breath now, feeling my heart beat in my chest. I place my palm to it and Ariana comes to me, wrapping her arms around me and gazing up into my eyes as she places a hand atop mine.

We stand there a long moment before Lucca joins us. As he steps behind me, wrapping his arms around me and setting his chin to my shoulder, something deep inside me becomes complete.

I sigh, held by my lovers.

And know they balance the power inside me—both the Light and the Night, though I have far more of the latter.

“You are saying it’s not over, if I still want to have a place on the Vampire Council and fight for equality between our people.” I glance up now, meeting Eiseth’s gaze as I wrap an arm around Ariana.

My other hand slipping to my side, my fingers interlacing with Lucca’s.

“It’s not over, Quinn.” Eiseth’s magic rises and her grey mist whirls around her. “You have to understand, however, that whatever you choose right now will have deep repercussions on many people. Not just you, Ariana, Lucca, and your Dark Haven… but many whose lives you know nothing about yet.”

“All those Dark Fae hidden in plain sight, within Vampire and Fae culture.” I understand as I hold Eiseth’s gaze. “They are all at risk if something goes wrong before the Council tomorrow night when I try to return the Revenant we caught. If something becomes unstable… and I expose my Light.”

“Precisely.” Eiseth warns as she gives it to me straight. “If you suddenly lose touch with your Vampire power and channel Light too strongly, because of how much your Vampire magic has been drained recently… the Council would know you for what you are. You’ve gone un der their radar for centuries without knowing it. But to suddenly discover that a Master with an entire Dark Haven is actually a Dark Fae… it would unleash a new pogrom upon us, and not just from the Summer Fae King anymore.”

“From the Vampire Council, trying to root out other Dark Fae in the leading ranks of their Dark Havens.” I know, as a horrible feeling engulfs me.

“It would be a bloodbath.” Arturos whistles, the only one among us who is not Dark Fae, though as a Vampire-Siren, he has a unique position of his own in Vampire society. “The Council would unleash hell on any Dark Haven knowingly or even unknowingly harboring Dark Fae. Especially if they’re led by any.” His gaze flicks to Eiseth, as they hold an understanding.

“How many of us lead Dark Havens?” I ask now, looking at Eiseth as well.

“Enough,” she says, though I understand I’m not high up enough yet in Dark Fae society to be party to that entire answer. “Quinn, you have a choice right now. You can either abandon your quest and leave Rome, failing to do your demonstration for the Council and take sanctuary in one of our Dark Fae’s hidden citadels?—”

“Or I can do the demonstration and hope I have enough Night left in me to keep my true nature a secret,” I know, finishing her thought. “And face disaster if I can’t.”

“Precisely.” Eiseth releases a breath. The bleakness of my choice is not lost on her, though I know which way she would have me choose.

A strong flow of energy passes into me from Ariana then, and another from Lucca—and I know I can’t run.

“We’re with you, Quinn,” Ariana says, gripping my waist, tucked to my side.

“Whatever you must do, in your heart,” Lucca says now from where he stands behind me, resting his head against mine. “For I have my own ambitions in Fae society, and I thought they were ruined also when Alleno and the rest told me the truth. Now I know they can still be… if we’re careful.”

“All our plans, however, hinge on me being able to control my Light with my Night tomorrow evening.” I glance at the window, seeing the white rim of the sky as the evening deepens to true twilight. “And we haven’t even talked about this urge I’m still feeling… to unleash it all and go Revenant.”

Silence envelops the room as I voice the one piece everyone seems to be missing. It’s a terrible silence, full of all our fates, as Lucca curls possessively around me from behind and Ariana grips me hard, squeezing my waist.

“That’s not going to happen, Quinn,” Lucca says. “Ariana and I are both here now. We’ll keep you from falling into that endless, dark place.”

“But you have it, too.” I twist to glance at Lucca, and he holds my gaze, frank.

“I do,” he says as he watches me. “I know I have that utterly black place inside me, just like you, and Ariana, as well. For how could I love you both so much if I didn’t? I know that place you want to fall into, Quinn. And I will keep you from going there. By reminding you every moment of every day that I love you. That my Light for you and Ariana both will never fail.”

Lucca’s admission of love brings tears to my eyes. I’m not a man who cries; but this is the second time in as many days, with everything that’s been heaped upon us. I’m not hysterical now from dire memories of Emiliana swamping me, though I feel them still on the edge of my mind, trying to push me into that black void from which there is no return.

The love holding me now, though, from both Lucca and Ariana, makes me return to the Light as I feel a deep blaze of my Summer Fae fire fill me. I know it’s not gone now; it will never be gone from me, and it never was. As I revel in it, I feel that revelry fill my Vampire powers as well.

Though not enough for what I need to return a Revenant tomorrow night .

It’s certainly not enough for that monster of a Revenant we caught, who I can still feel fighting against my wards, though it seems so calm right now in its Florentine Box. I glance at the box, sitting on its black velvet pillow on the table.

The Revenant is awake, watching us with its red, malevolent eyes. It is tiny now in its fist-sized enclosure, though the rage behind it is massive as it sends seeking tendrils repeatedly to the bars, testing the runes written upon them.

The runes are of my make; they are of my magic, and are fading now since I am so currently weak in my power of the Night. Not only that, but Arturos had to finish the containment on the box when I sacrificed myself to the Revenant; I designed this Florentine Box with both Vampire Bloodsigns and Faeanic sigils—and Arturos can only wield one of those magics.

Arturos sealed the box with only Bloodsigns when he closed it, making it weaker than it should be right now. That, plus my exhausted power keeping the sigils active, is a deep problem.

That’s not something I’m going to tell the rest of our audience today, however, as the others have far too much heaped upon them already.

“We present our Revenant tomorrow night, before the Council,” I say now, decided in which avenue I will take, though it kills me to put so many people in danger. “I’m not a man who runs from a fight; I will not run from this, even though everything seems bleak. For the Council must know they cannot threaten a Master of my stature who has technically done nothing wrong; there are no rules against Kissing a Dark Fae into one’s Dark Haven, nor are there rules against capturing Revenants and working magic upon them to restore their form and sanity. The Council are simply afraid of our power. Even though that power is weak right now, I will still make our stand, that they may not bully us. I will stand up for the egalitarian, modern society I believe can happen for Vampire culture. Running away loses us all of that, for any who might try in the future.”

“Very well,” Eiseth says, as I feel twin flows of strength pour into me from Lucca and Ariana, though none of us are currently at our best. “ Tonight, we plan. And tomorrow, you and Ariana go to the Council. We shall all pray to any Ascendants who are listening to give us strength tomorrow night. And the power to make the change we wish to see in the world.”

I couldn’t have said it better, as I nod soberly to Eiseth and she nods back. Arturos’ gaze is troubled, though he nods to me as well. Alleno simply looks ready, as he crosses his arms and gives me the deepest nod, like I’m still Fae royalty.

As I consider it, I realize I very well might be—I don’t know what happens to a Fae Prince who becomes a Dark Fae, even though for centuries he thought he was a Vampire. Even stranger things may be in store for us as I feel my heart’s steady beats, my body wrapped in the embraces of the two people I care about most.

Their hearts beat with mine.

All of us one, with whatever happens next.