Chapter 11

eleven

MARK

It was around four thirty in the afternoon, and I was in the Apple House giving a batch of undersized apples a final wash and sort before loading them into the press when I heard Candace cursing behind me.

I turned to see her struggling to wheel the outdoor heaters over to the seating area in preparation for her event tonight.

After shutting off the water, I dried my hands and made my way to her. “Hey, want some help with that?”

Straightening, she blew a strand of wayward brown hair out of her face. “God, yes.”

She had on a chunky mustard-colored cardigan over her navy-blue Judd’s Orchard tee shirt and some light-wash jeans. The weather had been chilly for the last two days, which was typical for autumn in North Carolina. The season was a mixed bag. Some October days were similar to those in the summer months, just without all the humidity, or they could be rainy and cold with a wind so fierce it could rip the hat right off your head. About midway through the month, we were somewhere in between. Mild, sunny days with evenings that grew cold as the sun melted behind the hills.

Candace was preparing for her wine-and-pumpkin-decorating event taking place tonight. The temperature would dip down into the fifties before the end of it, so the attendees would appreciate the four freestanding outdoor heaters when the sun finally set.

“Sure thing,” I said.

“I’m sorry if you were in the middle of something. I really appreciate the help.”

“It’s no trouble. I was just washing apples for the press.”

There was a bit of an awkward shuffle as Candace still tried to help and I tried not to surround her body with mine. We were both trying to grip a tall silver cylinder that stretched over six feet tall and tilt it so the small wheels engaged on the uneven dirt and grass. When her ass bumped into my thigh for the fourth time, and she apologized—for the fourth time—I offered to maneuver the heater myself if she wanted to guide me and tell me where to put it.

Probably best to avoid touching her backside, even inadvertently. Things between us had smoothed out in the last month. The way we’d almost kissed at Firefly had faded into the background of the farm and being co-workers.

Candace was still friendly and easy to be around, so it was only my own stupidity that kept remembering how she’d felt under my hands that night, the way she’d whispered my name. The casual dinner we’d eaten together at Flyers had been a couple of weeks ago. While it had been fun to be with her like that, it was probably safer to keep our interactions limited to the farm. So I didn’t forget that we were friends and co-workers. So I didn’t start hoping for more.

I shook myself and righted the heater into position, ensuring it was level. Over the next half hour, we worked to get the remaining three heaters out of storage and positioned around the picnic tables. Despite the late hour, I figured I could stay and help bring the pumpkins over from the Apple House too.

Tablecloths were spread, and wine bottles and stemless glasses were acquired. Candace had brushes and paint palettes for all the attendees. She straightened the place settings with care, little tweaks here and there. So much of her time and attention went into these events, and I knew it carried over from Candace herself—the high-achiever, the go-getter, the dreamer with that notebook that went with her everywhere.

At three minutes to six, everything looked picture-perfect. But there weren’t any guests .

The farm closed at five, and Nick and Amy and Joan had gone home for the day. Brady was on a dinner break and would be back any minute to help Candace with the event, and to make sure she wasn’t alone. While the vandalism hadn’t repeated itself, we still didn’t have any closure on the situation. Brady had volunteered to work late tonight to help Candace close and lock up.

She was staring toward the road that entered the orchard—the still-empty road.

“This is great, Candace. You should take some photos for social media before y’all get started,” I said, attempting to draw her attention.

She spun around. “You’re right. That’s a great idea.”

“Still a couple of weeks until Halloween. You could probably schedule another one of these since the registration filled up so fast.”

Candace was snapping photos of the table setup with her phone. “Yeah, well, if no one comes, it’s probably a good indicator that I shouldn’t try again.”

I glanced at my watch. “There’s still time.”

She smiled at my optimism, but it wasn’t the one she typically wore. This smile lacked the full force of her happiness, the joy she had for the farm. How she’d chat with tourists, work the refreshment stand with her mother, or coax a shy kid into an apple cider doughnut and a grin. Candace was usually so upbeat, it was disorienting to see her off-balance now. I felt helpless in the face of it.

“Do you think Brady accidentally latched the gate and they can’t get...” Candace trailed off at the sound of vehicles coming down the drive. She brightened. “They’re here.”

I smiled. “Told you so.”

Candace glanced back at me and grinned, visibly relieved. “Yeah, you did.” Her attention snagged on the procession of vehicles as they drew closer to the parking lot. “That’s Bonnie,” she said around a laugh. “She didn’t tell me she did this. Oh, and Mac and Laramie, too.”

Her voice had gone soft and surprised. “I better go greet them,” she murmured distractedly.

Candace took off toward the gravel lot, an excited little skip in her step, and I couldn’t resist the smile that came over me as I watched. Her friend had shown up for her and made sure her event was successful following the pumpkin mix-up. After her awful encounter with Lauren Walker downtown, I was glad Candace had Bonnie, and Bonnie’s friends and family by extension.

Part of me wondered if they’d keep in touch once Candace moved back to the city.

I figured her hurrying away from me now was as good a reminder as any. Candace didn’t belong to me any more than she belonged to Kirby Falls. This was a temporary pit stop, a layover until she went back to her real life.

I realized, belatedly, that I hadn’t been so innocent in my offer to help tonight. Yes, I’d heard her struggling with the heater and felt the need to be there for her, but I also recognized that work—on the farm—was the only safe way to spend time with Candace. Apparently, I was a glutton for punishment. It was important to keep out of situations where someone’s lips could find their way to anyone else’s, but I was still eager for her time and attention. Working late at the orchard was a safe enough way to do that.

Clearly, that lonely teenage kid with a crush still impacted my decision-making.

It was time for me to go and finish up my own work for the night. Yet, I stuffed my hands in my pockets and watched Candace walk away.

Candace

I barely let Bonnie get out of the car before I threw my arms around her. “I can’t believe you did this!”

She laughed, her arms tight across my back. “Well, I knew how upset you were about mixing up the pumpkin order. So I thought I could help you and have a fun night out with my gals.”

Bonnie was so sweet to support me this way. The registration for the sip-and-paint night had filled up inexplicably fast. Turned out, it was all my friend, and she’d brought reinforcements .

I leaned away to see her face better. “But this event was your idea. You told me I should set up something like this to bring in sales.”

“Well, yeah.” She grinned. “I’m a genius.”

I laughed and squeezed her one more time because I was so grateful for her friendship. Finding Bonnie like I had—completely by chance and right when I needed her—had been one of the best things about coming back to Kirby Falls.

“Come meet everyone,” she said.

Turned out Bonnie had brought a teacher friend from the elementary school along with her own mom, Patty, and her aunt, Maggie. I remembered Miss Maggie from the bakery over at Grandpappy’s. She ran things over there and made beautiful cakes. I didn’t realize she’d hired an assistant, but Chloe seemed really nice. She’d hugged me too, and I could smell the vanilla and sugar lingering on her skin. Chloe had introduced me to her friend Andie, who was pretty excited to be out for a kid-free evening.

Laramie Burke had graduated with me. I’d always liked her, and it was nice to see her now. I’d been meaning to try to catch up with her. She’d brought her best friend, Kayla, who I’d also shared some classes with. I welcomed them and pointed them in the direction of the picnic tables we’d be using tonight.

MacKenzie Clark was the next one to emerge from her vehicle. She hugged me and introduced me to the pretty blond woman climbing out of her passenger seat. Becca Kernsy was on vacation, but, apparently, it was an extended one, and the Clark family had absorbed her into their fold. I didn’t have the whole story there, but she was as sweet as pie. She’d also been the friendly volunteer who’d assisted with setup during the Orchard Fest. It was a fun coincidence meeting her for real and having her at the orchard.

“Have you recovered from the hot-wing challenge,” I asked Mac as we trailed the others.

She groaned. “Don’t remind me. I had to cancel a date that night. Being doubled over with stomach pain isn’t sexy.”

I laughed, feeling so light and buoyed by gratitude that I thought I might float away .

“This looks great,” Bonnie called to me when she reached the decorated picnic tables.

I took in the scene. It did look nice. With the sun setting in the distance, the sky was streaked with lavender and a pink so pale it should have been on a nursery wall. The hills were topped with gold and copper as autumn did its thing. And the farm only accentuated the natural beauty around us.

My guests were fawning over the setup and the pumpkins—the tiny palettes, paint sets, and water cups at each station. There were stencils for outlining and a cheese board to accompany the six bottles of wine I’d brought over from Lonely Mountain.

“You work magic, I swear,” Bonnie added when Mac and I finally joined her.

“Thanks. Mark helped a lot actually,” I finally replied.

All at once, I realized I’d walked off from him without a backward glance when the first car came into sight. My head swiveled, trying to find Mark among Bonnie’s friends and family, but he wasn’t there.

I’d been so relieved to see folks arriving, and then I’d been straight-up surprised to glimpse Bonnie’s car as well as the others. I’d gone to welcome them, and in doing so, I’d left Mark behind. I needed to thank him for his help. Guilt hollowed my stomach at what I’d done.

My gaze strayed upward to where I felt warmth blanketing my skin. He’d turned on the propane and set all the heaters on low for us.

Instinctively, I took a step away to search for him in the Apple House, but Laramie called my name.

“Candace! I want to see Lance Bass. Bonnie told me about the fish in your office, and I almost died. I’m an NSYNC superfan. I need to see it.”

But before I could answer her, Mac hoisted a bottle of Lonely Mountain pinot grigio and hollered, “You can have your picture made with Lance Bass later, Larry. Let’s get these bottles open.”

I glanced between the Apple House where Mark might be and all these women waiting on me to do my job. I felt pulled in too many directions.

I pasted on a smile and went to grab the corkscrew .

When I’d finished uncorking a bottle of Gandalf the Blanc, I passed the opener to MacKenzie who was waiting to open the second bottle. Just then, my brother came strolling across the grass from the direction of the parking lot.

He caught sight of Mac and stopped in his tracks. “Are you sure it’s a good idea to arm her?”

I heard a low growl emanate from my side.

“And you’re giving her wine?” he added helpfully. “Wow, sis. No self-preservation instinct in you at all. She’s probably using her access tonight to case the joint.”

“I’ve told you a hundred times, Brady Judd. I did not vandalize your property. It was probably someone else who finds you painfully annoying,” Mac stated matter-of-factly.

“Oh yeah?” He smirked and crossed his arms over his flannel-covered chest.

“Yeah. We have a club and everything. We meet on Tuesdays down at the library. Only room big enough to hold us all.”

My brother opened his mouth, but I cut in, “What are you doing here, Brady?”

He shot Mac one last glare before answering, “I’m working this event with you and closing tonight. I just got back from my dinner break.”

What?

“I thought Mark was on the schedule,” I argued. “He was out here helping me for over an hour.”

My brother shook his head. “Nah. He was off at five. I’m your backup tonight. And good thing since you have a violent delinquent in your midst.”

I ignored the bickering his comment sparked as my mind spun and my feet carried me across the grass.

Mark had stayed. He’d helped me move the freestanding propane heaters and then he’d hauled pumpkins and wine and paint supplies back and forth from my office. He’d positioned and decorated the tables while I’d arranged the cheese board.

And he was supposed to go home nearly two hours ago .

I mounted the steps to the Apple House and found him in the back near all the equipment, right where I’d interrupted him the first time. He said he’d been washing fruit for the apple press, and here he was, trying to finish the job after he’d helped me with mine.

I felt overwhelmed by want and gratitude and an ache in my heart that just wouldn’t go away.

Mark was one of the best guys I’d ever met. He was so gentle and patient. Kind but unassuming. He took up only the space required when it was probably half of what he deserved. I’d never felt so safe with someone, so utterly cared for. Mark was reliable and comfortable, but only to the point that my heart started to race and my breath quickened.

I wanted to hold his hand. Sit around a bonfire. Read different parts of the same newspaper and let him make me breakfast. I wanted to run my fingers through his soft, short hair until he fell asleep with his head in my lap. Sit next to him at the dinner table at the farmhouse and keep my knee pressed right up against his.

I also wanted to run my hands over his body and experience his strength. Have him pick me up and put me on a counter, so I could get as close as I wanted—as close as I could get.

“Mark,” I said, my voice too weak and confused and breathless to be heard over the sound of the water and the conveyor transporting the apples to the press.

So I stepped closer and pressed a hand to his warm back, gaining his attention.

When he turned and found me standing there, he smiled first, like his lips couldn’t help themselves. I clung to that reaction, watching those blue-gray eyes crinkle at the corners and his mouth tip up in a subtle grin. But then he got a good look at me and the way I’d stepped into him—close, closer than I should have been, closer than I ever allowed myself.

His grin fell away, and his gaze moved over my face, looking for an answer I didn’t have.

With a finger through Mark’s belt loop, I tugged him to me, but a whisper of caution and uncertainty brought me up short.

“Are you with anyone?” I asked, desperate for the answer. After everything that had happened in my last relationship, I couldn’t do this without knowing the truth. No matter how strained or distant our relationship, I could never knowingly hurt my sister.

Mark’s confusion intensified, drawing his dark brows together beneath the bill of his cap. “What? No, I’m not seeing anyone.”

Relief pulsed in time with my longing. I nodded. Then I rose on tiptoe and pressed my lips to his.

I thought Mark would freeze up or hesitate with the way I’d ambushed him, but he didn’t. His lips parted on a sigh, and I traced the seam gently with my tongue. His hand found my waist in the sliver of space between my tee shirt and unbuttoned cardigan, and he gripped me with purpose. I loved it. It was a fraction of his strength, but it was something I longed for. I could feel the dampness from the water on his hands seep into the fabric, and it was proof that this was real. It was happening.

There hadn’t been a pause or a jump scare to pull us apart at the last minute. No hesitation to slow us down. I kept my index finger wound through his belt loop, just in case. With my other hand, I cradled his scruffy jaw as we kissed.

His scent surrounded me. The bright shimmer of rainfall and garden soil and growing things. So much vibrant green that I could see it behind my closed eyelids. His touch was a balm, cooling relief from this painful crush I’d been hiding away and hauling around.

I let my hand drift to his nape, where I could run my fingers through his dark blond hair, the way I wanted, the way I’d imagined. Mark made a sound as my nails grazed his scalp. It was deep and wanting, a tug on a line that connected us and had me answering with a groan of my own.

I heard laughter come from out by the picnic tables, and I knew I should pull away. I’d simply walked off minutes ago, like someone in a trance, trying to make sense of Mark’s actions. I had work to do and a group of women waiting for me.

And from the way I still held him by his jeans, I could feel the evidence of Mark’s arousal on the backs of my fingers. This wasn’t really the time or the place.

So I gentled the pressure everywhere we touched, slowing my movements to cool the need burning within .

The heels of my sneakers met the wooden planks of the Apple House floor, but Mark bent forward, following me down. I smiled against his mouth as I pressed one final kiss to his plush lower lip, which was just as soft as I thought it would be.

The hand on my waist loosened the fabric in its grip. Mark traced down the length of my arm until he found the point where we were connected, the belt loop I still held.

“I didn’t want you to get away this time,” I murmured shyly.

You only got one first kiss with someone, and the butterflies doing flips in my stomach were letting me know that this was one for the record books. If I’d been fifteen, the memory would have gone in a locked journal with some hearts and squiggles doodled in the margins.

Mark’s smile was dreamy, a drowsy sort of affection that I wanted to snuggle up in.

I pressed my fingers to my lips as I regarded him affectionately. The soft skin felt tingly and swollen in the best way.

Mark’s eyes tracked the movement and his expression grew thoughtful all at once.

“What is it?” I asked, suddenly worried.

“Before, why did you ask me if I was with anyone? Why would you assume that?”

My finger instinctively tightened around his belt loop. “Oh, that.” I licked my lips nervously, tasting him there. “I thought you might—possibly—be my sister’s secret boyfriend.”

“What?” Mark’s voice came out loud in the scant space between us, and my attention snapped to his in alarm. Lowering his voice, he spoke softly this time. “Secret boyfriend? Candace, what are you talking about?”

“I saw you and Joan at the Orchard Fest. I thought—I thought?—”

Mark’s frown deepened. “Saw us what?”

“Well, Joan was rubbing your arm. You two were close. It looked like she was comforting you or something. And then you were both smiling at each other. ”

Surprise gave way to thoughtful introspection as I spoke. “Candace, your sister and I are friends and co-workers. Yes, she was trying to make me feel better, but there has never been anything romantic between us. Not ever. I’m not—I’m not interested in her that way.” He took my hand and squeezed. “Do you think I’d try to kiss you if I was?”

“Well, no,” I admitted. “But you ran off that night and you wouldn’t talk about it. You seemed to want to forget that our almost-kiss at Firefly ever happened.”

With a shy smile, he admitted, “Because I like you, Candace. And I didn’t want you to feel weird because we work together and have to see each other all the time...temporarily, at least.”

I smiled too, ignoring the reminder of my looming deadline. “I don’t feel weird. I like you too, Mark. So much.”

With another tug of his belt loop, I had him wrapped up in a hug, my arms around his waist and his quiet laughter rumbling against my chest.

Feminine voices drifted in through the open-air space, and I could see now it was nearly dark outside. “I need to go wrangle this event, but more kissing later, yes?”

Mark chuckled again as I took a step back. “Yeah. More kissing later,” he agreed with a grin. Blue-gray eyes lingered on my face, touching every part. It was as if he’d finally given himself permission to look and he didn’t know where to start.

“And thank you for your help this afternoon. I meant to say that earlier, and just now before I attacked your mouth. Thank you for staying late and just generally always being there when I need you.”

His expression was soft as he watched me. “Anytime.”

Hurriedly, I pecked him on the lips and then took off toward the yard and the picnic tables beyond. Everything looked to be under control upon my approach. Someone must have taken the corkscrew away from Mac because I didn’t see it embedded in my brother anywhere. The women were still chatting, and another two bottles of wine had been opened. The cheese board was mostly demolished, and when I came into view, all my guests cheered.

Grinning, I joined them. “Sorry about that. Are y’all ready to paint? ”

A round of yesses met my ears, so I gestured to everyone to take a seat in front of a pumpkin. I showed them the stencils for anyone who wanted them and made sure everyone had the supplies they needed to get started.

With the pumpkin painting underway, I circulated and refilled drinks and paint as needed, chatting as I went and getting to know these women who were so important to my friend, Bonnie.

Mac shared a story about finding an entire naked family behind the storage shed over at Grandpappy’s last week. Apparently, they’d been trying to take a weird photo op with a self-timer, their baby inside a pumpkin, and everyone else holding up squash from the farm’s pumpkin patch to cover their private parts.

Everyone was laughing as she recounted the incident amid her shudders.

“I’m scarred for life, I tell you,” Mac said as she put a final flourish on a black cat she’d been painting.

“I’m sure seeing a naked man for the first time was shocking for you.” Brady laughed.

Thankfully Becca prevented well-deserved violence against my brother when she caught sight of something on the property.

She stood to get a better look and pointed at a furry body in the distance. “What is that?”

I squinted to see a groundhog standing on its back legs, ignoring us completely and eyeing the apple tree closest to it.

“It’s a groundhog,” I offered.

Becca took a few steps closer into the darkness, her long blond hair shining like a beacon. She pulled out her phone and started snapping pictures. “I’ve never seen a groundhog before.” After another few shuffling paces in the animal’s direction, she added, “It’s so cute. I just want to tackle it.”

At least six people all shouted, “No!” The groundhog took off into the field at a run.

Becca turned back to us and pouted. “Gosh, you guys. I wasn’t really going to do it. Even I know better than that. ”

“No offense, babe,” Laramie called. “But you’re a city girl. We just had to make sure you weren’t going to get yourself mauled and maimed.”

I moved among Bonnie’s friends and family for the next half hour, listening and laughing and just generally enjoying myself. This didn’t feel like work. It was nice being surrounded by a group of women who were all kind and funny and included you in their conversations.

Seated beneath the warmth of the outdoor heaters, on the farm my family had built, I was happier than I could ever remember being. I liked these women, and I wanted them to be a part of my life—a life here in Kirby Falls.

As the voices and laughter swirled around me, I swallowed an awkward lump in my throat and wished for the hundredth time that I could stay. I wanted to stay .

But you couldn’t always get what you wanted.

Movement up on the front steps of the Apple House caught my eye. In the bright glow from the floodlight on the corner of the building, I could see it was Mark. His hoodie was zipped up to ward off the chill and a small, secret smile was visible on his face.

I could feel an answering grin on my own.

He paused when his boots hit the grass and raised his hand in a wave.

My smile widened, and I waved back.

He gave me a long look with those pretty blue-gray eyes, and I felt it behind my sternum. There was something happening in the center of my chest. My heart was beating hard, but not so much in panic. More like a dance party with techno music and glow sticks and everything.

Finally, Mark gave me a nod and shoved his hands in the pockets of his hoodie before turning toward the parking lot and his waiting truck.

I could feel myself going soft and warm all over. I wanted to tuck him inside my heart and button him up behind my cardigan, keep him there forever. Mine to have and mine to hold.

An elbow nudged me in the side, and I jolted in surprise.

“Would you look at that,” Bonnie said slyly next to me .

Oh, Lord. Had she seen me making googly eyes at Mark?

But when I glanced her way, her attention was focused on the next picnic table over.

I followed her gaze and felt my lips part in mutual surprise. “Holy crap.”

Mac and Brady were sitting across from one another, and they were the only ones at the table. The other folks probably vacated due to their constant squabbling.

But they weren’t fighting now.

Mac was still working on her pumpkin. However, she and Brady were clearly in conversation. He watched her while she made careful strokes along the surface of her pumpkin, and she glanced up at him frequently. They looked like they were having a completely normal discussion.

Suddenly, MacKenzie erupted into laughter, and Bonnie grabbed my arm. “What is happening?” she hissed. “Is the world ending?”

I noticed the other ladies at our table had quieted as well, drawn by the spectacle of Mac and Brady actually getting along.

“I’m afraid,” Laramie said in a hushed tone.

“Is someone recording this?” I heard someone else whisper.

And then Becca murmured softly, “Classic enemies to lovers.”

As we all sat silently and watched those two bozos behave themselves for once, I couldn’t help but think that stranger things had happened. Maybe just because their relationship had always been one way, didn’t mean it couldn’t adapt. People could change. Futures shifted all the time and expectations along with them.

We weren’t simply the sum of our past, I thought hopefully.

A breeze cut through the warmth from the heaters, causing me to shiver.

Just as suddenly, the tides shifted and Mac’s voice rose in indignation as she pointed her loaded paintbrush in Brady’s direction.

I heard a sigh from Chloe and a softly muttered, “Oh shoot,” from Becca .

“Just shy of five minutes,” Larry said in disappointment. “I owe you five bucks, Aunt Maggie.”

Amid Mac’s angry hollering, my idiot brother’s laughter rang out, vindictive and delighted in equal measure.

Maybe change was too much to hope for in certain situations. I probably shouldn’t let my imagination get away from me either.