15. Lamb

Chapter Fifteen

LAMB

P ersuasion was an art form.

There was a time for pushing, and a time for pulling.

I knew what I’d been doing when I’d brought up Anna. Knew what push I was giving. I’d even expected the pushback. But what I had not expected was for Ash to shut down entirely.

Anna was bound to be a sensitive topic for her. With the way they had fallen apart—Ash having severed the bond between them herself—I shouldn’t be all too surprised at the way she had reacted, especially with her preluding words.

So, here I sat, now on the third and final step, waiting.

Even though it had been intentional, I was lamenting my choice. The soft touch of her skin, her hooded, pleading eyes, and her warm, wet lips haunted my brain. To have touched, even just once, had been a curse, and now with each step the closer I took, the more I craved. I had become greedy, and I feared there would not be enough of Ash to fill me. Even if I consumed all of her, I would still want more.

I had never been that patient of a man. If I wanted it, I took it. I never understood why I would have to wait for something I could achieve through other means.

But Ash was different to me. There were no shortcuts or easier options. She was as complicated as they came, and my approach would put to test everything I knew and then some. Still, it didn’t stop the barrage of thoughts, mentally testing any and every way possible.

Trying to stave the growing noise in my mind, I poured myself a drink. I swirled it around in the glass, watching the golden liquid sweep around the edges, savoring the aroma.

The whiskey was warm on my tongue, sending tingles down my throat and pooling in my stomach. I could see why Ash had chosen whiskey as her companion; the sweet spice both punishing and comforting in equal measure.

I reached for a second glass and split the last. It was encroaching on the time for her drink, and where she’d normally be lingering in the corners of my vision or flat-out pestering me, Ash had remained sullen and distant. Not even the whiskey had been enough to lure her from her room. Even so, it’d do her no good to sink into withdrawal, not with the delicate balancing game we’d been playing over the last week. Or, at least, that was my excuse.

Tipping back my head, I let the last finger of whiskey warm my body before picking up the second glass, heavier and colder than I remembered it.

Just as I was about to get up, my phone blared to life, the ringtone slicing through the silence, lighting up the dim room like a beacon.

I glared down at the caller, a familiar name crossing the screen.

Boss.

I sighed, setting down Ash’s glass. Silencing the tone, I allowed the call to go through a few more rings before I slid across the answer button. I could feel the burn of Wolf’s impatience through my palm, and I reveled in it for a moment before putting it to my ear.

Big mistake.

“Why do you never answer on the first ring!” Wolf’s voice blared down the device. “I know you have your phone on you.”

“Learning patience is never a bad thing.” I smirked, the irony amusing to my own ears.

“Fuck off.”

“Anyway,” I sighed, swapping the side of my phone as I tried to rub away the ringing deafening my left side. “I’m sure you haven’t called at three a.m. to hear a lullaby from me.”

“The day I call you for a lullaby is the day I cut my dick off.”

“Want to bet on it?”

Static hung on the other end of the phone for a beat before a short word cut through. “No.”

“But—”

“Church. Ten minutes,” Wolf growled, and before I could squeeze out even one more word, the line went dead.

Someone was grouchy.

P ulling up to the club compound, I glared at the obnoxious square building. I’d had to leave my peace offering for Ash outside the bedroom door, infusing it with the small chance to earn back some trust. It was more like a bribe, but I wasn’t beneath anything that would push her out of her shell and hopefully back into my arms.

Already mourning that she wouldn’t be waiting for my return, I spotted more bikes rolling through the car park, along with a couple of cars pulling through the gate.

Hunter and Jax pulled in beside me as I slipped from my seat and stood.

“This better be something good,” Hunter growled, pulling off his helmet, revealing deep-seated bags around his eyes as he gave the building a glare like I had. “I’ve barely had an hour of sleep.”

“Little one keeping you up?” I mused at the huge ogre of a man, weakened by something that weighed little more than a bag of rice. Still, having sleeping troubles with a one-year-old child was bound to hollow out a man, even one as resilient as Hunter.

“Mallory was up with her during the day, so it was my turn for the night shift.” He rubbed a hand down his long face, his wild beard unkempt and out of control around his chin and jaw. “I’m getting the snip, I swear to God.”

Jax’s shrill gasp had us both whipping toward him.

The cowboy paled at Hunter’s words, hand clasped over his heart, the other over his mouth. “How could you even think of doing such a horrendous thing!” he wailed. “That’s sacrilege .”

Hunter scoffed, unfazed by his best friend’s reactions. Jax was known for his dramatics.

“You wait.” He jabbed a finger at the smaller, slimmer man. “Once you’ve had to spend the first six months on two hours of sleep— if you’re lucky— then try telling me you want more.”

To Hunter’s chagrin, Jax beamed, the light of his smile too bright in the early morning dusk. “Can’t wait.”

I rolled my eyes at the pair, ready to leave them behind as I walked toward the building. “Just sell it to the circus and be done with it,” I advised, ushering the two men as they stepped beside me.

“You’re a cruel bastard,” Hunter grunted.

“Then quit your bitching,” I retorted, unwilling to hear more about the baby infestation plaguing the club. It was like someone had released a fertility bomb a few years ago, and now everyone had popped out enough small humans to create their own biker baby club.

“Would you seriously?” Jax skipped ahead as we approached the door, other brothers merging into our group.

“Would he what?” Pretty chimed, swinging open the door to let them through first as he converged with our small posse.

“Lamb said he’d sell his kid to the circus,” Jax repeated.

“That’s in character,” Pretty agreed, giving me a considering, but nonjudgmental look.

“ In my character ?” I paused, frowning at the younger club member. I could hear the distance voices muffled and moaning beyond the doorway into the clubroom.

Pretty shrugged. “Just sounds like something you’d do. Can’t imagine little Lamb’s running around and you changing their diapers and shit.”

It wasn’t something I’d expressly considered.

Not one to be left out, Jax added his two cents. “It’s not like you ever hang out with the kids. Mind you, I haven’t seen you hanging out lately, with kids or brothers, or hell, even women.” His eyes narrowed, doing a slow once-over from top to toe, as if there might be a clue hiding in plain sight on my person. “ What have you been up to?”

“Nothing much.” I smirked, feeling a sense of challenge burn through my chest. I fixed my eyes on my younger brother, doing a slow once-over of him. Information brewed on my tongue, and I began to let it slip. “Actually, I’ve been spending time up in Redwood recently. There’s a place on 32 nd Avenue that—”

“STOP!” Jax blurted out, lunging to grab me and silence my words.

I dodged, missing his grip, but not the glare that whirled with my head.

“How do you even know about that?” he hissed, ready to pounce again.

I looked at our little group and noticed a few other brothers had stopped, staring at our display with curiosity. I smiled. “Still curious about what I’ve been up to?”

He paused, his glower bitter as the undercurrent threat processed through his pretty head. “ No ,” Jax snarled before stalking off into church.

Hunter glanced between Jax’s retreating form and the smile still sitting sweetly on my lips a few times. A shiver passed over his body before he shook it off, following fast after his friend.

Pretty, however, wasn’t as wise; he stood staring at me, curiosity battling his better sense across his face.

“Do you want to know?” I raised a brow, my smile pulling a little wider.

Pretty glanced over to the empty doorway where Jax and Hunter had escaped and the other gathering brothers darting past. Fortunately for Pretty, his better sense won.

He shook his head. “No.”

“Good.” I clapped my hands, my victory secured and my smile dropping. “Now get in there. Church is about to start.”

T he water rippled across the tub, my fingers dragging through the frowning expression reflecting up at me, distorting an image I didn’t recognize.

I’d spent hours wondering if Ash would take the chance to escape, if this was finally enough to push her to run again, realizing it was worth the risk to escape my grasp once more. After I’d managed to keep her by my side, careful not to spook her, lure her just enough to stay. All my hard work threatened to crumble with a few mistaken words.

I’d barely managed to sit through church, forcing myself to stay like some sick atonement from start to finish. I remained locked in my chair until I was one of the few dregs remaining. Then I drove every mile home under the speed limit, despite wanting to gun the engine so hard that even the dial wouldn’t keep up. And when I’d opened the door to the dark, curtain-drawn house, I’d unlaced my boots, shrugged off my jacket, and took each stair one quiet step at a time.

I’d nearly fallen to my knees hearing her soft footsteps moving around the bedroom. The fear and anxiety that had infected my stone walls released me, and I hadn’t realized how tightly it had been holding until I’d managed to take that deep breath of relief.

She was here. She hadn’t left. I hadn’t fucked up.

The bath water stilled, my face piecing itself back together, one soothed ripple at a time until a calm face looked back. My brown eyes were relaxed, and my hair was tidy and styled, as if a storm hadn’t just raged through me. A storm I’d never felt before. A storm I hadn’t seen coming.

My wet hand slid to my neck, my eyes following the movement in the bath water’s surface. Trickles of water dripped down my collarbone, tickling the ridges of my muscles as it slipped beneath my hanging shirt collar. I pressed my fingers to the side of my throat, feeling the calm, steady rhythm beating beneath.

“The water is going cold.”

I turned, the stool protesting beneath me, and found her lingering in the doorway.

I scanned her from her long, bare legs to her narrow, boxy hips pressed into the doorframe, the hem of my large black shirt falling just past her underwear. I swallowed, forcing my eyes to move away, up to her cocked head, framed by her wild brown hair. Ash’s lips were flattened into a line, but her clouded eyes told a different story. They returned the languid cataloging stare, from my bare feet and denim jeans, all the way up to the damp shirt, before taking a teasing detour over my neck and face before finally meeting my gaze.

“You’re up,” I spoke.

Ash stalked into the bathroom, her strides narrow and overlapping, more the walk of a cat than a human. She strode past me like I was air. The steam filled with her scent, and I fought to lean in closer and take a deep breath.

She reached past me, so close her brown hair grazed the bare skin of my arm, and dipped her hand beneath the water. Our world rippled and swayed again, but I stopped looking at it. My eyes ate up every morsel Ash presented, tracing each line of her movements like an unsung song going around my head all day.

“It is still warm. Good.” Ash sighed, returning to her standing, lithe posture. Even all her years on the streets couldn’t hide the straight, proud pose of her shoulders. Class and education simmered deep in her bones, and it trickled through every layer of dirt, grime, and attitude she hid behind.

“Hold this,” Ash cut off my thoughts, a black shirt dumped on my lap.

I jerked up, her soft, pale flesh exposed right in front of my face. My mouth watered, knowing I could reach forward and take what was painfully just in reach.

I trailed the complex spattering of scars across her body, the shiny skin highlighted in the humid, damp room. I wanted to bite each one, leave marks deeper than the scars that bound her to her past.

Ash slid down the black panties and tossed them toward me, as well. This time, I caught them. I fisted the dark material between my fingers, locked on to whatever little game this girl was playing as she had me straining behind my jeans already, treating me like I was nothing more than a hamper. A hamper all too ready to take a bite.

She took slow, delicate steps, gradually gliding beneath the milky-white surface. A satisfied, sensual sigh slipped from her lips, her shoulders sinking into the warmth, her face melting into relaxation, eyes falling closed.

“What are you doing?” I interrupted, waiting for those clouded, cautious eyes to flick to me, just for a beat.

Ash didn’t even twitch. “I am bathing.”

“I can see that,” I said, the noise becoming a rumbling growl as I glowered at the surface of the water, jasmine, and chamomile washing away her scent and obscuring her naked body beneath the surface.

“It is five,” Ash said in return, as if that explained everything. “You always run a bath at five.”

It was, and I had.

Routines were important, both in my plans and my own life.

I scanned over that delicate face once again, admiring the relaxed, creaseless edges of her skin. As much as I had been observing her, Ash had also been observing me.

A door once opened can be stepped through in either direction, so to speak.

Revealing her keen observations gave me an unusual sensation. Having always been the one to watch the room, pick people apart piece by piece, and read between the lines they so desperately tried to blur, it was a new experience to have the same done in return. I wondered if she liked anything she found, or if she discovered something to fear, like many had done in the past.

“Do you have a razor?” Ash shifted in the bath, finally opening those cool, cruel eyes. Water sloshed against the sides as she brought her knees back up to her chest, sitting upright and bringing one leg to breach the surface. Her long fingers ran down her shin, sliding and settling underneath her knee, holding her calf from sinking back below. “I cannot remember the last time I shaved my legs.”

I frowned.

“Shaving my legs was a low priority.” Ash rolled her eyes, flicking open her other hand to count off her fingers. “After food, shelter, water, and—”

“That’s not what I meant,” I cut her off. Her observational skills weren’t lacking, but her inference needed some work. I got up off the stool and turned, heading over to a cabinet and pulling out the small pack of razors kept stock underneath.

“Thanks.” Ash reached for the razor, holding her palm outstretched.

I pulled it out of reach.

“Hey!” she snapped.

I shook my head at her, enjoying the frustration wrinkling her nose and small creases appearing between her brows. I wanted to smooth the line with my thumb and bite the tip of her nose with my teeth.

I sank back down on the stool, pulling it closer to the edge as I did. Bathing in the sharp tingles of Ash’s gaze watching with weary eyes, I saddled up next to her. I grabbed the hem of my shirt, lifting it up and over my head before tossing it to the side. Steam immediately groped the bare skin, a soft sheen coating my muscles and abs. I caught a sliver of Ash’s tongue peeking between her lips, and I wrangled myself in control.

Ignoring my throbbing dick, I pretended not to see the lust burning across her cheeks and chest with that soft red flush I craved to taste and sunk my hand beneath the water. Electricity seared through my skin as my fingers skimmed over hers, my larger, wider hands securing her legs with much more grip and ease than her own, smaller ones.

Her hand escaped my grasp, jerking back to her chest, but her legs stayed firm in my grip, her shallow panting breaths swirling the steam dancing over the surface of the water.

I changed my focus, ignoring the whimpering, begging cries from behind my zipper, brought the razor to her skin, and began my work. I was smooth and precise, a trail of perfectly polished skin left behind with each stroke of my hand.

For something so simple and mundane, it soon grew into something else. With each smooth stroke, I could feel the tremor of Ash’s thighs rippling down to her calf and could hear her bated breaths growing louder with lust.

Inch by inch that I glided had her riling further and further, and all I wanted to do was sink my fingers deep into the pussy I knew was calling from the depths of the water. I wanted to lick my fingers, curious how much of her I could taste in the water already, like a shark called to blood. I longed to search for the part of her that needed me most.

Despite my overwhelming urge to touch her, I was addicted to the slow, languid movements of my hands, delighting in the way she built with each swipe of the blade, absolute power, and control, and trust trapped in my minute movements.

I nearly caved when I moved onto her other leg, her hips bucking against my knuckles as they grazed her. I wanted to abandon my project and start a new one that would have her screaming my name, but I needed to finish my first. I saw everything through to the end. Always.

“Why?” I spoke, hiding the strain tugging at my throat, needing something to distract my mind from the all-consuming thoughts.

“What?” Ash responded after a beat. Her face was flushed, her hair damp and plastered to her skin, a smooth sheen glowing across her amber face.

“Why did you want to shave your legs?” I reiterated, my words slow and controlled.

“Does it matter?” Ash grunted, her hot and bothered attitude brimming with frustration.

I repositioned my blade at the top of her knee, letting my pinkie finger graze the edge of her calf. Her leg twitched, and I fought back for mental control. My little teasing touch was doing as much mental damage to myself as it did to her.

“It doesn’t,” I agreed. “But I’m curious.”

“Why do you care?” Ash shifted in my hands, trying to wiggle in my grip. I tightened my hand around her calf, squeezing the soft, bitable flesh in my hands. I raised the blade from her skin until she understood my message, her resistance fading.

I placed my blade against her again. “If you wanted to do it for yourself,” I said, following the last and final line of fine hairs, completing the perfect picture of polished skin. “That’s fine, but if you’re doing it in any way because of me …” My voice dropped, and a deep rumble rose. It lilted my words and brought a fire into my chest. The one brewing in the furnace at the base of my spine, in my jeans, and in the back of my mind was now blazing and roaring.

If even just the seed of the thought had been planted in her mind that she wanted to incite me, tempt me, or seduce me … I would be tipping over the edge of a cliff I hadn’t noticed I was standing on until this late.

I let my gaze crawl up the inches to her face, little by little, her leg still held firm in my grasp, anchored within my control.

“Answer me,” I breathed, my eyes finally fixed on hers, pupils dilated and damp, wet lips floundering to speak. Her bright red face spoke volumes, the lust mixed with surprise and caution screamed words to me. Guilty as charged.

“No,” Ash breathed, words weak, eyes betraying.

I dropped the razor in my hand, and before I thought about what limb to move, I was already there. My hand gripped her jaw, my lips slamming into hers, punishing and consuming, greedy and needing. Ash’s gasp dissolved on my tongue, her hands grasping my arms, fumbling and fighting to brace against me.

Water sloshed against my skin, sizzling and dissolving into the rising steam as the heat building inside of me was overflowing and out of control. I released her calf, sliding down beneath her thighs, fingers grazing the soft globes of her ass as I angled for a better grip.

I hoisted her up to the edge of the bath, needing her closer and tighter against my skin. I was braced over the top of her, my groin painfully crushed into the edge of the tub, fighting against the smooth edges of the porcelain and the desire to bring her to me.

It wasn’t enough.

Using newfound strength, I lifted. One hand under her ass, the other slipping around her back. I broke the kiss, my lips throbbing in pain and begging for warmth, as I pulled her straight out of the water, rocking back onto the stool, her body slapping flush against my wet chest and her bare ass soaking into the thick denim of my jeans.

“Lamb!” she gasped, suddenly righted and in my arms, her dazed, dewy eyes struggling to comprehend how we’d gone from there to here.

Her weight was the right amount as her wet pussy sank into the crotch of my jeans. My bulge pressed straight into her, and my dick begged to be free and sink home to where it belonged. Ash wiggled on my lap, her wetness sinking through to my own pants, unsure what was water and what was her personal lubricant.

“Tell me to stop,” I growled, sinking my face into her wet shoulder. Her hair clung to my face, her chest rising and falling beneath my lips, my teeth aching to reach out and taste the forbidden fruit. I was no vampire, nor cannibal, but this woman had me becoming a monster in all sorts of ways. I’d consume her right now if it were the only way I could have her. “Just one word, and I’ll let go of you right now.”

I forced my fingers to relax, each one painfully stiff as I pried them from her, not enough to release her but enough to pull back from the sweet scent of her skin. I turned my head up to where she was peering down at me.

Her eyes were glossy and hooded, lips moist and parted, and her short, near-panting breaths ran over my damp skin. Her gaze danced over my face, not settling on any particular place, her thoughts moving with the same struggling concentration. Her mind was in disorder, out of sync with the body tremoring on my lap, fingers digging into the flesh of my shoulders, and tongue darting out to dampen her swollen red lips.

I forced my body still, desperation to buck my hips and grind my rough jeans into the wet pussy weighing down on top of it busting at the seams. I wanted to push her and demand an answer, but I held my impatience in check. She was getting there; it was just taking time for her to sort between what was lust and what was logic, something with which I was also struggling.

“What stopped you?” Ash whispered, her husky voice nearly drowned beneath the pounding inside my chest. “I am here, naked, on your lap.” Ash began to stroke lazy circles around her stinging nail marks. “You could take me however you like.”

Blood rushed in the back of my mouth, the metallic iron bitter and cold down my throat. “I don’t know what you think about my club, about me,“ I growled, not liking the way it pooled like ice-cold lead in my stomach, my dick faltering at her implication, “but the only way this dick is going into your tight pussy is you soaking wet, legs spread, begging for it.”

Ash’s thighs tremored, and my God, my simple dick stood back to attention, unaware whether her tormenting gesture was out of anticipation or trepidation. Her gaze heated, eyes widening, and her toying fingers stilled on my shoulders.

“Oh,” she whispered, the tight little circle of her mouth calling for my tongue.

Another thought occurred to me, and if I thought I’d been ice-cold before, now I must have been arctic. “If anybody has ever treated you otherwise, I—”

“ No ,” Ash rushed, her hands jerking to cover my mouth.

Don’t bite. Don’t even lick them.

“It is not that,” Ash explained, her hands floundering between us, her mind struggling through her words. “It is just … I have never—”

Her crimson cheeks deepened, and the words rushed lightning-fast through my brain. “You’re a virgin?”

Her gaze darted away to the floor, the shy gesture soaking my jeans as she threatened to end me then and there. She nodded.

“Fuck,” I groaned, the word strained and painful out of my mouth. I was in danger of busting out of my skin, my mind, my body, my dick—all of it was about to implode at the physical, emotional, and lustful whiplash.

“Well, there is no need to react like that,” Ash huffed, grabbing at my shoulders as she tried to lift herself off my lap.

My hands clamped like vices around her hips, putting her right back where she belonged. “Nuh-uh, sweetheart,” I growled, deep and guttural.

She stilled, back rigid, eyes wide.

“You ain’t going anywhere.”

Ash’s defensive fangs reared, missing the undertones of my command. “You are obviously not in the mood anymore, so I will—”

I raised my hips, my dick pressing up into her core, her heat sinking through the thick material. A hot, surprised gasp rushed over my face as I groaned in pleasure at just the thought of plunging myself into that tight, burning pussy.

“You’re wrong.” I raised one hand from her hip, sliding over her back until I could sink my fingers into her damp, thick hair. “I don’t know what it is about you,” I purred, pulling tight on her scalp. She gasped again, her head leaning into my grasp as I pulled her close enough toward me that her small, firm breasts were planted firmly against my chest. “All you have to do is breathe into my direction, Ash, and I’m ready to fill you with my dick until you taste me. Do you understand?”

Ash tried to nod, but my hold had her motionless. Instead, a small, husky “Yes” whispered from her lips.

“But the second there isn’t anything you don’t like, or don’t want, all you have to do is say it,” I added, fixing my eyes dead on her, knowing the truth lay in them. She could see through me, and though I wasn’t sure how I felt about it during the day, at this moment, I needed it. Needed her to see that I was telling the truth. That it mattered that she trusted me. “One word. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” she breathed.

“Good girl.” I released my grasp on her hair, letting my fingers slide through the damp, polished ends.

“Now. Where were we?”