14. Satan

Mammon is such a toddler. I merely maimed him and he's acting like a fucking pussy. Brianna said to hurt him. I followed my lady's orders. It could have been worse, and he knew it. It's not the first time I've fought one of my brothers.

He left her son behind. I may be a literal devil, but I love kids. The younger ones inadvertently send me letters either because they can't spell or they're working on writing. Those kids get whatever they ask for. Santa may not be real, but that doesn't stop me from leaving gifts. I also like to give the people headed for Hell a gift as well. Theirs aren't so nice.

My brothers know not to go to Earth on Christmas Eve. That day is mine. It's one of the two days a year I go to Earth. The Sins try to go as much as they can. I savor my days because they're so far apart. Also, I don't want to live among them as much as my brothers do. Lucifer doesn't want to be on Earth, either. He just doesn't want to be in Hell.

I'm sitting in the large dining room across from Greed. He's sulking while we wait for our food to be brought to us. "Cheer up, Mammon. You're bringing my mood down."

"Then, maybe you should have left me to wallow in my room." I laugh, thinking of Rellick and Beel in their costumes, looking for treasure in him room. "Why are you so fucking chipper anyway?"

"I met the boy. Cute kid." Greed lifts his head in confusion. "Brianna's son. The one you left behind and got this shit beat out of you over."

His eyes flare in recognition. As though something finally clicked in his head. "You almost killed me because I didn't bring the kid to Hell?"

"I didn't ‘almost kill you.'" Mammon rolls his eyes, one of my biggest peeves. Honestly, the next person to do it may lose their eyes. Can't roll what you don't have. "She asked me to hurt you."

"What?! Why the fuck would she do that?! Like she didn't have two fucking orgasms in the throne room!"

Punished souls open the doors to the dining room, setting down multiple plates of food on the table in front of us. Our servers were once selfishly wealthy humans who treated their underlings as trash. Committing sins left and right to better themselves, rather than the company as a whole and their employees. I now get to treat them how their employees would get treated. The power boost and just raw enjoyment I get from being a pain in the ass is bliss. "What color am I?" I ask, stopping the souls from walking away. They pause to look at each other, not knowing if I"m speaking to them. "Are either of you colorblind?"

Their breathing turns hard. "No sir," one finally answers. His voice sounds like gravel are stuck in his throat. "You're red," the other responds.

"Correct. So… where's the red meat?" Mammon finally lets out a laugh. The souls begin sputtering, before turning toward the kitchen with a ‘yes, sir.' I wait until they're about to walk through the door, then speak again. "You're forgetting something." They pause and turn back to me. "Take this food back." The twitch in their eyes while I speak to them as if they're utterly incompetent gives me great pleasure. It means I'm punishing them correctly.

With the two souls gone, my attention goes back to Mammon. "You were saying?"

"What did I do that was so horrific for her to ask you to kill me?"

"She didn't ask me to kill you. She asked me to hurt you."

Mammon scoffs at my response. "And you listened because…?"

I know my smile is malicious before I speak. "Because that woman is the most rage filled human on Earth. She feeds me more than most. And you…" I make sure his attention is focused on me while I continue. "You brought her here and left her son behind. Alone." Every word makes Greed's frown larger and his eyes wider. He's starting to realize how bad he fucked up.

"I didn't know," he mumbles.

He didn't know? "You had been watching her for a while, correct? How did you not know she had a child?"

Mammon slides the food away from him causing it to fall on the floor and the plate to shatter. "I only ever watched her at work! There are a million kids at that place! How was I supposed to know one was hers?! Why would I watch her at home? The only time she ever leaves her apartment is to go to work." He throws his chair back and slams his fists on the table. "Fuck!"

Halfway through his rant, I stopped listening. She's here. In Hell. My energy stays focused on her constantly and it has just become overwhelming. I can feel her rage, but with it is sadness. What's going on?

I leave Mammon behind as I fly out the window to the fourth-floor terrace. Before I can walk inside, Beelzebub pulls Brianna and Rellick through a portal, disappearing from sight. "What happened?" I ask Belphegor. He looks pissed. His blue skin is beginning to turn purple with how enraged he is.

"Where is she?" Spinning, I see Leviathan shifting forms to his aqua colored dragon-humanoid.

Sloth crosses his long arms, and growls. "She's where you can't get to her."

"What the fuck is going on?!" Neither of my brothers pay me any mind while they death glare at each other.

Leviathan growls. "Tell me where she is."

"She's home with her son." The smirk on Belphegor's face belies his intentions until he continues. "And Gluttony."

Envy yells unbearably loud before turning towards his bedroom and slamming the door. "What happened?" I repeat for the third time.

"He ignored her. Made her feel like trash. I know he was trying to incite jealousy in her, but it was too much. She called for me, crying alone in the restroom of whatever restaurant they were at."

The words fuel my own rage. I turn to Envy's bedroom, breaking the door down. Levi knows it's me yet does nothing as I grab him by his neck and teleport us to my stadium. It's filled with stands and a glass dome covering the arena floor. Watchers can see through the glass without being affected by what is going on on the ground. It's where most of my favorite punishments happen. Souls will fight demons to either become one or to be reincarnated after their punishment has ended.

I throw Leviathan to the ground of the arena. A siren blares, telling demons in the area that a fight is starting. "What did you do?"

"I took her to dinner, and I spoke to our waitress. Apparently, I didn't pay enough attention to her in the thirty minutes we were together."

"Levi, tell the whole story." I give the signal for my demons to close the dome, locking in my brother and I. He stands and squares his shoulders. He may be intimidating to everyone else in Hell but not me. Never me. I run this arena. "You flirted with the waitress in front of Brianna, then paid her no attention so she would commit your sin." I hold my hand out, a black metal pitchfork appearing in my hand. It's heavy and sharp, making it my perfect weapon for the arena.

As the devil, humans assume I cheat, steal, and never play fair. They couldn't be more wrong. I always fight fair so my demons know that I will always be superior. Levi chooses a basic sword as his weapon. He uses his fists and three sharp rows of teeth more often than not. I know the sword is just for show. He also has the power of water, and my field arena has multiple areas. Sand, water, grass, mountain. I dare demons to use their strengths in battles. How will a soul know it deserves its prize if the fight was too easy?

"Why does it fucking matter? We need her to commit sins. I was attempting to accomplish that. The rest of you are so pussy and power whipped by her that you're forgetting the reason she was brought to Hell in the first place."

I rush forward with my pitchfork overhead, slamming it down against his sword. "I haven't forgotten. You want to be on Earth permanently." Lifting my weapon, I intentionally hesitate, waiting for Envy to see the opening. I counter as he swings, letting him know that I allowed it to happen. "The difference is that I don't care about Earth. I like it down here in Hell." We parry back and forth for a few minutes. "And I haven't had that sweet cunt." I lean over him, pushing my pitchfork down against his sword until the sharp edge of his own weapon is against his neck. "Yet," I smirk when we lock eyes.

His own envy fuels his power, and he throws me off. I land on my feet, smiling at him. Yes brother, get mad. We can't feed off each other, but my siblings get sloppy when their emotions take over.

Leviathan throws his sword at me, and I dodge at the last second. Water begins to surround us, rising with the movements of Envy's hands. I've trained myself to be able to fight in any surroundings. A little water won't hurt me since my wings are resistant to most materials. Their webbing will resist absorbing the water.

My brother shifts to his full form. An emerald-green dragon with webbed feet, and fins to glide through the water. His tail covered in poisonous spikes. This form makes him three times my size.

In his attempt to intimidate, he's limited himself in space. My arena is big, but not enough for his projected movements. It becomes too easy to tuck my wings and use my tail as a propellor to climb onto his back. He's quick. It takes me a few tries because Leviathan likes to spin like an alligator, but I am able to shove the prongs of my weapon into his back, severing his cervical vertebrae.

The water in the arena drains into the pond in the far corner and Leviathan shifts back to his demon form. The severed spine will take, at minimum, six hours to heal. He lays limp on the ground, and I flip him to his back. His eyes can move, but his body is paralyzed until he heals. The dome begins to open, and the sounds of demons cheering my name fill the air. I place my foot on Levi's chest and lift my arms to my people.

A bright orange light flashes across Hell, lasting only seconds. The crowd quiets immediately, the realization of the orange light shocking them. I look down at my brother, laughing maliciously. "Where you have failed, it seems Gluttony has succeeded." I lift Envy over my shoulder in a fireman's carry and teleport to the throne room. Lucifer and Asmodeus are in their seats. Sloth shows seconds after I do. "What is she at now?" I ask Pride.

"Four. This puts her on the list for punishment. She committed gluttony before they bonded together."

I drop Envy before his throne, not caring if I'm not gentle. "What's left?"

Pride and Lust look confused at the state of Leviathan. Sloth seems indifferent, but he gives me a small nod of acknowledgement. "Envy, greed, and sloth."

"We're on track then," Asmodeus states. "Belphegor, have you seen or heard anything when you were with her?"

A shake of his head is his response. He doesn't talk very much unless he has to. ‘Minimum effort' is his motto.

"Lucifer, what about you? You watched her for those seventy-two hours. Did you feel any holy presence?"

"No." Lucifer prides himself on knowing everything that is happening around him, yet he is clearly befuddled at this predicament. "I felt my fellow angels, though none were focused on her. And Adon was definitely not on Earth. His presence can be felt across the realm."

Gluttony portals into the throne room, face filled with satisfaction. "Hello, brothers." He swaggers to his throne, shifting to his demon form as he walks. Taking a seat, he looks at all of us. His eyes pass over Levi, his smirk turning into a smile. "Let me guess… Satan?"

"Why would you assume it was me? Maybe he pissed off the wrong demon."

"You're the wrong demon," Beel emphasizes. I shrug. He's correct. Our eyes meet, and Gluttony mouths the words ‘thank you.'

"And how was it?" Asmodeus brings Beel's attention to him. "I want every filthy detail. Please!" he begs.

"Why are you back? Why didn't you stay?" Lucifer's tone brings us all back to reality. His eyes are focused on his tablet that holds our Sin System. It's got the four lists that determine where a soul goes after death. I definitely do not miss the days of enchanted paper.

"She was going to sleep. She asked for space. Today was an emotional day for her."

"Wait," I interrupt Gluttony. "You fucked and bound her to you, and she asked to be alone? You didn't fuck her right then."

"You're sure she's alone?" Lucifer tries to cut in.

"Yes, she's alone." Beelzebub answers without looking at Pride. "And you're right. I barely fucked her at all." His face turns cocky as he says, "I ate. I ate until she begged me to stop, then I fucked her, then I licked her clean until she was pushing my head away." Smug bastard.

"Where's Mammon?" Lucifer's voice is starting to grate on my nerves.

I search for Mammon's energy. "He's in his room. What is your problem?"

Lucifer waits until all of us are focused on him, ever the dramatic angel. "She's been absolved."