Chapter Ten

Evelyn

My head felt like it was going to explode. At first, I didn't believe what Apple told me. The idea that a man I'd shared a large part of the last thirteen years with, a man I believed I was in a permanent relationship with, a man who had fathered both my children, had just tried to have me killed just didn't compute. But when Danny told me he loved me and the children, I knew. It was the same face, the same tone of voice he'd used all these years to deceive me. This man wasn't capable of loving anyone but himself.

"Just a little longer, baby," Knox put an arm around me and guided me inside. Instead of taking me back to my bedroom, though, he took me through the house and around to the backyard. Grover had a small shed where he kept tools. Knox took me straight to the shed and shoved me inside, closing the door behind us.

"OK, honey. Rage all you need to."

It was like a dam broke. Knox's permission to lose my shit broke loose everything I'd been trying to keep inside. Losing Grover had been bad enough, but just the thought of what Danny had done…

"The kids were right there, Knox! They were right fucking there!"

"I know, honey."

"They could have been killed!"

"They weren't, though. They weren't. I'll find out if Danny was involved. If he was, I'll take care of him. He'll never hurt you or the kids again."

I pushed back to look up at Knox, tears streaming from my eyes down my cheeks. I knew I probably looked horrible -- a pretty crier I was not -- but I needed Knox to really pay attention to what I needed to say.

"Whatever happens, I don't want the kids to know." I shook my head violently. "Not about this. It's bad enough what happened. If Danny did something -- anything -- they can never know."

"Honey --"

"No! I mean it, Knox! They do not know! Ever!"

"OK, Evelyn. I swear I'll never tell them. But you know Luke is smart enough to figure it out."

"I don't care. I'm not telling them, and I don't want you to, either. If he figures it out and asks --"

"I'm not going to lie to him, Evelyn, and I don't think you will either. He's already in super-protective mode over you and Aneshya. He trusts me right now. If I lie to him, I destroy that trust."

I sobbed then, knowing he was right. Knox pulled me tighter against him and held me for long, long moments. He let me cry and rage. I'm sure I screamed into his chest more than once. Through my entire breakdown, Knox held me. He soothed me with his presence, with his lips in my hair and his arms around me. I'd never had anyone to hold me like this. To encourage me to get out all the emotion I had pent up inside and let me know someone cared about me.

It was all too much. I knew if I didn't find some way to get out all this emotion, I was going to start screaming again. So I took Knox's face in my hands and pulled him down for a kiss. I thrust my tongue into his mouth, needing for him to take control but unable to voice my needs. Knox, being the dominant man I knew he was, immediately swept me up into his arms and set me on a workbench.

He continued to kiss me even as he ran his hands up my shirt to cup my breasts. When he squeezed, I thrust my chest out, wanting more. Needing his touch to be rough and demanding.

"Knox!" I gasped out his name into his mouth.

"You need me." That wasn't a question.

"Yes."

"Do you trust me?" He trailed his mouth from my lips to my ear, then down my neck to my collarbone.

"I do! Please, Knox!"

He stepped back to whip my shirt over my head. Knox wrapped his arms around my torso before fastening his lips around one nipple. I couldn't help the scream, especially when he bit down. Instead of dampening my need, the sharp pain seemed to inflame it. My hands flew to his head, threading through his hair.

Knox growled, and I felt the vibration from my nipple straight to my clit. My cries weren't subtle. On my second scream, Knox clamped a hand over my mouth. Then he was by my ear, whispering.

"That's it, my beautiful little wanton. You're close to coming, aren't you? I haven't even touched your clit." I nodded because he still had his hand over my mouth. "Don't you come until I tell you."

What? How the fuck was I supposed to do that? Especially with Knox biting, suckling, and licking my nipples. The man seemed to know exactly how to bring me up, then let me float back down before I crested the hill.

The more he teased and played with my tits, the more out of control I felt. It was like I was on a roller-coaster, only I couldn't quite get to the top. I knew that once I finally made it to the top of that first hill, the plunge downward would probably drive me mad.

Knox pushed me back, so I rested against the wall while he worked the fastenings of my jeans. He forced them down over my hips, taking my panties with them. The second they were out of the way, Knox dipped his head to swipe his tongue through my folds.

My muffled scream was loud in the little shed. Thank God, Knox put his hand back over my mouth, because I was sure I was loud enough as it was. The very last thing I wanted was for someone to come in on us.

Then Knox smacked the side of my thigh. "Eyes on me, Evelyn," he snapped. "You look at me. Keep your attention on me." He licked me again, and I felt moisture gush from my pussy with each masterful stroke from his tongue.

I did as he commanded because I was helpless to do anything else. Knox was my anchor. He was driving me higher and higher, and I knew that when he finally let me fall, I'd give him everything inside me.

He took a couple more tastes from my cunt before he lifted me and spun me around. Taking my wrists in each hand, he placed them on the bench, pushing my back until I bent at the waist, resting my upper body on the cool wood.

I heard a ripping sound and turned to look over my shoulder as Knox slipped the condom over his cock. He bared his teeth at me before gripping my hair and forcing me to face forward.

"Stay still," he growled at me, his hand holding my back down to keep me in the position he wanted me in.

Then he entered me in one sharp, swift stroke. I sucked in a breath to scream, but Knox's hand clamped over my mouth once more. His hot breath was harsh in my ear, and I shuddered.

Only giving me precious seconds to adjust to his size, Knox started to fuck me. Hard, fast strokes hitting deep inside me put every nerve ending I had on high alert. I felt like I was about to explode out of my skin. It felt good. It felt freeing. Like the buildup swamping me would get rid of all this restless energy. And grief.

I braced my hands on the wooden bench and pushed back, fucking Knox while he fucked me. I needed more. I needed him to take complete control and force me to his will. I think maybe I needed to know he was not only capable of dominating me, but that he would when I needed it.

As if he read my mind, Knox snagged my arms and pulled them back behind me. He looped his arm through them and held my upper arm with one hand while the other clamped back over my mouth once more.

The second he had a good grip, Knox pounded inside me. Like a jackhammer. I was completely overloaded. All I could do was take what Knox gave me.

"That's my good girl," he praised. "Takin' my cock so fuckin' good."

I grunted behind his hand, sucking in air through my nose and screaming.

"You need to come?"

I tried to scream that, yes, I need to come so fucking bad, but Knox didn't remove his hand. He seemed to understand, though, because he put his mouth right beside my ear and growled, "Come."

Like he'd flipped a switch inside me, my body detonated. My knees gave out, but Knox held me up. He didn't stop fucking me. Knox pinned my body between his and the bench, his cock as deeply inside me as he could get it. I screamed behind his hand, thrashing in his arms while a raging, angry orgasm engulfed me. The blast was nothing short of nuclear. Every emotion inside of me seemed to focus on that fucking orgasm, dragging it out to give my body and mind enough time to expel all the negative emotions, the grief in my heart.

When I finally reached the bottom, I was exhausted. I couldn't stand, but that didn't seem to matter. Knox kept an arm clamped around my waist to hold me up as he fixed my pants and snagged my shirt. I floated on a tranquil sea after the storm. Knox was my anchor. My rock. The glue holding me together.

"I love you, Knox." I have no idea where the words came from, but I couldn't deny them, or take them back. I didn't want to do either. For all he'd done for me and given me, Knox deserved to know the truth. And that truth was I was completely in love with the man. Anything I thought I'd felt for Danny was nothing compared to the love I felt for Knox. Nothing.

"I love you too, baby. I'll always take care of you and the kids. I swear I'll be by your side for the rest of my life."

"I need you. I'll always need you."

"I feel the same way. My dad knew what he was doing when he told me to be the man you needed."

"I'll be what you need too. I want to give you the peace you've given me."

"Honey, you already do."

It struck me then how much I'd missed in my life. I had two wonderful kids I loved with all my heart. Yet, I'd never had someone to stand beside me and help me, both with the kids and as a life partner. Danny had been in and out of our lives, but I'd settled for the part of himself he gave us and hadn't asked the hard questions.

"If I'd demanded more from him early on, maybe I'd have prevented it going this far. Christ, Knox! I lived with the man for thirteen years!"

"It's amazing what you can accept if you live with it long enough, baby. All of this is on Danny. Not you. Never you, Evelyn."

"And poor Luke. Keeping what he saw to himself for weeks."

"Luke is smart. And so protective of you and Aneshya. He's a great kid. Gonna be an even better man."

Knox was breaking my heart. Had I ever heard Danny praise Luke like that? Even if Luke wasn't physically here, it was still more than Danny had ever said to or about the boy.

"That's all because of you, honey. You taught him right from wrong and how you treat family. You. Not Danny."

She sniffed, scrubbing the back of her wrist under her nose. "Your dad did too. No matter how often Danny was gone, your father was always there."

"Dad was like that."

"My parents were older when they had me. Mom was forty-two and Dad was forty-seven. Both of them died in their late sixties, so the kids were pretty young. They were too young to remember them, so they didn't get a lot of quality time together. They knew Mom and Dad loved them, but it was your dad who passed on the life lessons fathers should pass on to their kids."

"It was obvious how much he loved them."

"It was." I broke down again, crying into Knox's chest while he held me. We stood in that shed, and he let me cry, never once trying to hush me. He understood my need to grieve. I was sure he was doing his own grieving. "You just got your dad back only to lose him."

"Yes. But I got to make things right with him. Got to show him how much he meant to me. He might not have liked that I left without telling him why or where I was going, but Dad was a Marine. He understood sometimes things don't go the way they're supposed to."

"Is that what happened?" I looked up at him. Knox had said he was going to take care of us, that he was going to take us to his club's compound, but I needed to know what that meant. I'd still go no matter what, though. Because no matter how short a time I'd had with Knox, I knew I never wanted to be without him. Not so long as my kids had what they needed.

"Yeah, in a nutshell. I can't tell you everything because it's classified, but I can tell you that some of the things I've done for my country would get me killed."

"So it was dangerous."

"Still is. That's why we have our own hidden little sanctuary. It's self-sustaining for the most part, so we don't have to leave if we don't want to. It's only been recently we've started getting out more."

"Is everyone in Grim Road like you?"

"You mean are they Black Ops? Yeah. Every single one of us has worked on unsanctioned missions for the government. Usually the CIA."

"I guess I'm a little naive, but I thought that kind of thing only existed in the movies."

"It's not something anyone really talks about. The movies make it a little more glamorous than it really is, but the bottom line is, when the lines of legality and sometimes morality get blurred." He snorted. "Or obliterated entirely. When that happens, if it's time for an election and a possible administration change, you try to put everything on hold until you know who's gonna be in charge. What could earn you a medal with one president could send you to prison with another."

"I never thought about it that way."

"And I never want you to have to again. I disappeared not only because of what I did, but because of what I know. My handler on my last mission didn't expect me to make it home alive. It was a suicide mission."

"Knox! Oh, God!"

"Fortunately for me, I didn't get the memo. Got in and out with barely a scratch. When I couldn't reach anyone at the pick-up point, I broke protocol and called Rocket. He was my team leader. He directed me to a secondary pick-up point and sent his own people after me. That's when I joined Grim Road. The club's been around since before the formation of the CIA, but most of us are there now because of our ties to that agency."

"So that's why you keep to yourselves."

"Yes. We've come out of our compound and into the city more in the last few months than we have in all the years since I've been there, but we still have to be careful. We'll always have to look over our shoulders and keep our heads down, but with the proper paperwork for the vehicles and bikes, as well as some creative identity manufacturing, we manage."

"You said you were working on homeschooling for the kids?"

"Yeah. Effie is living with Rocket and Lemon. She's not much younger than Aneshya. Gina and Lemon are getting a homeschooling program together for her. I see no reason Luke and Aneshya can't do the same. If they need more help than what we can give them here, we'll figure something else out. There's a club in Kentucky called Bones MC. We have ties to them through our weapons guy and a couple named Mama and Pops. Their president's old lady is a teacher. If we need to, we'll contact Cain for help."

"Are you sure we won't be in the way? I don't want to be a bother."

"Honey, it doesn't matter if you're in the way. You're coming with me. You gave me your trust, and I'm not lettin' you take it back. I want you with me. I want the kids with me. I'll do whatever I need to make you comfortable in order for all of you to be with me."

I took a breath. Looking up into Knox's eyes, I could see not only the sincerity but the determination to make that happen. This was a man who wanted us where Danny never had. It felt like something settling in my chest. An easing of pressure and stress. "OK." It was all I could manage around the lump in my throat.

"Good. Leave it all to me. All you have to do is what I tell you. If you have questions, ask. But I swear I'll do right by all of you."

The thing was, I believed him. With all my heart, I believed him.