19. Chapter 19

Chapter nineteen

Luke

L uke avoided Genesis and his packmates as much as possible over the following days. He couldn’t handle Gabe’s probing questions, Lando’s quiet disappointment, or the look on Genesis’s face when he’d backed away from her. And he definitely couldn’t handle what she’d said before that.

Just because this is my first time being in love, it doesn’t mean I don’t understand loss.

When had things gotten so fucking out of hand? He’d thought he had the situation under control. They had one more month of fake courting and then…

What then? Was he going to let her go? Tell his packmates he didn’t want her and try to go back to the way things were before she waltzed into their lives and blew everything all to hell?

Luke didn’t know what he’d planned to do when the contract was up. What he did know was that, despite his best efforts, that bright-eyed omega had been slowly chipping away at his defenses. He’d tried to keep her at arm’s length, but she had a way of drawing him out, getting under his skin.

More and more often, Luke had caught himself smiling. When he was with Genesis, he sometimes forgot that he didn’t deserve a new omega. It was too easy to relax around her, to let down his guard and enjoy himself too much. The pretend courting shit made it even easier. His packmates seemed to be with her constantly, and he couldn’t resist joining them more often than he’d intended.

And the fucking sex was unbelievable. The first time Luke knotted her, he’d felt a satisfaction and peace so complete that it’d nearly brought him to tears. He’d settled on top of her with his face in her neck just breathing her in and enjoying the residual fluttering of her pussy around his softening knot and all the noise in his head had gone silent. It’d been perfect.

Luke had avoided her for two days afterward, only joining the pack for dinner and maintaining a surly silence throughout the meal. Nobody commented on his absence, but Genesis had studied him with those big doe eyes that saw far too much. On the third day, he’d showed up at the cottage before breakfast and eaten her pussy until she couldn’t stand anymore.

His therapist, Dr. Dashwood, had been stern when Luke told her about his behavior. “Luke, you have to stop punishing yourself. You don’t even know why you’re doing it anymore.”

“I’m not–I do know–it’s just,” Luke had spluttered before scowling and crossing his arms. His therapist was not impressed, having seen the same grumpy stance hundreds of times over the past decade. “I’m just not ready.”

“Bullshit,” Dr. Dashwood replied, pursing her lips. The grandmotherly beta often surprised him with blunt honesty when she felt like he needed it. “You have to remind yourself to feel guilty because this budding courtship is actually healthy and happening at the right time. Don’t be a damn fool and self-sabotage something wonderful that you’ve earned. You’ve suffered enough. You deserve to be happy, Luke Wyatt. You have to start believing that.”

Luke had stubbornly tried to ignore the advice, venting his frustration by rising early and doing as much back-breaking labor as he could manage by sundown. He fell into bed at night exhausted, but sleep didn’t come quickly. Instead, he tossed and turned, thoughts of Genesis keeping him awake until he finally fell into a fitful sleep only to wake up a few hours later and start the whole routine again.

Three days after she’d said she was in love, Genesis found him in the barn examining his rope kit. It had been many years since Luke had indulged in rope play, but he still kept his kit pristine, replacing or mending frayed ropes, oiling them, and trying out new materials. The meticulous practice usually soothed him and helped calm his mind. It wasn’t helping now.

Luke ignored the omega but couldn’t help being acutely aware of her presence. Her sweet scent somehow overpowered the smell of animals and manure and hay, beckoning him. It took all of his energy to resist that pull. It was like she had one of his ropes, and each day it grew tauter, attempting to bind them.

“How long are you going to avoid me?” she asked, making Luke jump. She was closer than he’d thought, having drawn nearer while his back was turned. “Until the contract is up? Forever?”

Luke brushed past her to grab a towel, relishing the brief contact even as he kept his face carefully blank. Truthfully, he was long finished with the day’s chores. He’d even sent several farmhands home early, just so he could do their jobs and stay far away from the cottage.

“Takes a lot of work to keep this place running,” Luke replied curtly, still not looking at Genesis as he returned to his seat. He couldn’t. If he did, he knew his resolve would weaken, and he couldn’t have that. He needed to keep her safe, and that meant far away from him.

“Don’t bullshit me, Luke Wyatt,” Genesis snapped, using his full name in an infuriating way she had undoubtedly picked up from Lando. “We both know you’re avoiding me, and we all know why, so let’s be adults and talk about it.”

Luke gritted his teeth. It was annoying how goddamn reasonable and persistent she was. Maybe it was her age or her profession, but either way it was a problem. He’d hoped she’d be hurt or pissed enough to stay away and wait for him to come apologize. Or maybe to just decide he was too much to deal with and leave. That would’ve been the best outcome.

Liar , a little voice whispered in the back of Luke’s mind. Coward.

“So, talk,” Luke growled, still not looking up from the length of hemp he’d been inspecting. “If I had something to say I would’ve said it. You obviously have a bee in your bonnet so speak your piece.”

Genesis made a frustrated noise in the back of her throat and Luke didn’t have to look at her to know she was glaring at him, probably with that sexy, defiant glint in her big anime eyes. She stepped closer to stool where he sat, her scent wrapping around him like a python. Luke concentrated on keeping his breathing steady.

“You’re afraid,” Genesis said. “I’m afraid. Orlando and Gabriel are afraid. But only one of us is letting that hold us back. Why?”

“Maybe because only one of us has the good sense to recognize a lost cause when it’s staring them in the face,” Luke replied coolly. Inside, though, he was far from cool. He was hot with shame and anger and arousal and, yes, fear. So much goddamn fear it was paralyzing.

“Bullshit again,” Genesis countered, just as coolly. “You blame yourself for Evelyn’s death.”

Luke flinched. He was so tired of people saying that as if it meant anything. Of course, he blamed himself for Evie’s death. It was his fault.

“Orlando told me that you were supposed to pick her up on the day she was killed, but you were late,” Genesis went on, her voice gentle but determined. “How many times did you pick her up on time, Luke? Dozens? Hundreds? And how many times were you late picking her up? Probably just as many. You couldn’t have known that this one time would be different.”

Luke was clenching the rope so tightly that his knuckles were white and his hands shook, but he kept his voice steady. “The most important thing in any alpha’s life is taking care of his omega. It was my job to keep her safe, to always put her first, and I was fucking around in a meeting that I can’t even remember the purpose of. That’s on me, no matter how you try to dress it up.”

“More bullshit,” Genesis said, and Luke wanted to scream. “Did you know that omega women are six times more likely to be killed than beta women? In some states, that number is as high as twenty times more likely. Last year, omegas faced the highest rates of victimization of any designation: 27.2 violent crimes per 1,000 omegas. I could go on. I’ve learned a hell of a lot of disturbing statistics lately.”

Luke grimaced. He hadn’t known any of that, but it didn’t matter. He’d still failed unforgivably.

“Would Evelyn want you wallowing in guilt and self-pity for the rest of your life?” Genesis asked.

Luke couldn’t keep a lid on his anger any longer. He shot to his feet, glowering down at the sassy omega who he couldn’t seem to get out of his thoughts. She didn’t shrink away. Instead, she glared back at him defiantly.

“We’ll never fucking know what Evie would want because I let her die!” he shouted. “Goddammit, Genesis, what part of that don’t you understand? I can’t keep you safe and I can’t stand to lose you!”

Luke’s chest heaved as he tried to wrangle his emotions. Genesis regarded him calmly. To his surprise, her lips twisted into a smirk.

“You sound exactly like my dads,” she said. “The dads who you threatened, by the way. I believe you said they’d be answering to you if they upset me again. Now, here you are, upsetting me in the exact same way. How ironic.”

“That’s entirely different,” Luke shot back, with no real bite behind the words. He remembered how furious he’d been, listening to their bullshit excuses for neglecting their daughter for so long, and undervaluing the fierce independence and resiliency she’d been forced to develop in their absence. He’d wanted to wring their necks.

Genesis cocked her head, regarding him shrewdly. “Is it though? My fathers blamed themselves for my mother’s death. They were afraid they couldn’t protect me, so they sent me away. We missed out on nearly twenty-five years of shared grief and joy or even a basic relationship because they were too selfish and stupid to think beyond their alpha guilt. They pushed me away to protect themselves. Are you going to do the same thing, Luke? Are you willing to sacrifice not just your happiness, but mine and Orlando’s and Gabriel’s as well? Are you going to make us all miserable so that you can continue to punish yourself for something that was not your fault ?”

Luke deflated. He felt hollowed out. Everything was too much, and he didn’t know what to do with it all.

“What do you want from me, Genesis?” he asked quietly. He felt utterly helpless, and he hated it, but more than that he felt completely unmoored. “Just tell me what you want me to do, because I’m fucking lost here. I don’t know what the fuck to do with any of this.”

Tentatively, she reached out a hand to touch his face. Luke wanted to shrink from her touch, to push her away as he’d done before. Instead, he leaned into it. Her hand was soft against the roughness of his beard.

“I want you to try, Luke,” she said softly. “I just want you to give this a chance. Give us a chance.”

Luke shuddered. He wanted to say yes, to stop fighting this thing between them and just give in. But he couldn’t.

“I can’t, Buttercup,” he said after a long moment. “I want to, but I just can’t.”

Genesis sighed, pulling her hand back. Luke thought he’d finally done it. She’d given it her best effort and now she was going to cut her losses and walk away. His heart ached but he kept his mouth shut. He had to let her go.

Genesis stepped back, but instead of leaving, she took off her cowboy hat and set it aside. Luke hadn’t looked at her properly, but now he saw how damn delectable she looked. She’d dressed in the hat and boots he’d gotten her, with a long linen western-style dress in a shade of burnt orange that complemented her beautiful skin. It gathered in at the waist and had a ruffled skirt with lace embellishments. As Luke watched, she began to unbutton it.

“What are you doing?” he asked hoarsely, unable to tear his eyes away, even though he knew he should.

Genesis shrugged. “Sometimes, taking a leap is hard. Especially if you have to jump first. I had Avery and Greyson pushing me to try, then Orlando and Gabriel being vulnerable first to make me feel safe opening up. Thanks to all of them, I can try to do the same for you.”

Luke watched her dress fall to the barn floor. She hadn’t bothered to wear a bra, and her small breasts pebbled with gooseflesh in the open air. In cowboy boots and a pair of those boy short panties that looked so good on her ample ass, she was absolutely incredible. Luke’s cock hardened immediately.

“It wasn’t easy for me to decide to trust you all, but I do,” Genesis said. “ All of you. Let me show you. Tie me up, Luke.”

Luke gaped at her, trying to process her words. He’d done everything he could to try and scare this omega off, and she was asking him to tie her up. His cock was painfully rigid, urging him to comply—it had been so fucking long—but he shook his head. She didn’t know what she was asking. She couldn’t.

“I did some additional research, outside of what I was doing for my story,” Genesis told him, her husky voice like a caress. “Apparently, rope play involves a lot of trust, especially for the bottom. I have to trust you to keep me safe, to take care of me. And I do. And if I do, maybe you can try trusting yourself.”

Holding his gaze, Genesis sank slowly to her knees in front of him, using her dress to cushion her knees. She looked so beautiful, and Luke could already imagine how perfect she’d look with a lark’s head single column tie around her torso. He’d start above those perky little tits, then…

No. He had to stop this. Luke shook himself but couldn’t bring himself to step away from the kneeling omega.

“You don’t know what you’re asking,” he said roughly, his hands clenched tight around the length of hemp he’d been inspecting. “Rope play can be incredibly dangerous. There are so many ways you could get hurt, especially when you’re new.”

“I know,” Genesis replied, not sounding the slightest bit concerned. “That’s where the trust comes in. I know you’ll make sure nothing bad happens to me.”

Luke exhaled shakily, his mind racing. He wanted this so badly it scared him. But then everything about this omega scared him.

Because he wanted her. He wanted her so fucking bad that he couldn’t sleep or eat or think. It was driving him mad. It would be unbearable to have her and then lose her. It would break him.

Don’t be a damn fool and self-sabotage something wonderful that you’ve earned , Dr. Dashwood had said.

You need this more than you know, Luke Wyatt … give this arrangement a chance, Lando had said.

Are you willing to sacrifice not just your happiness, but mine and Orlando’s and Gabriel’s? Genesis had asked. I just want you to give this a chance. Give us a chance .”

Luke took another deep breath. Then he leapt.

“You’re going to tell me right away if anything is too tight,” he said, feeling the tension in his shoulders ease as he let himself slip into the scene. “If you feel any numbness or tingling, tell me immediately. You can use your safe word or just say stop. Got it?”

“Yes, Daddy,” Genesis replied, eyes glinting mischievously.

She was going to be the death of him.

Luke cracked his neck as he returned to his kit to select a rope of the right length. He felt his anxiety and anger slipping away as he returned to the kneeling omega and positioned himself behind her. When he wrapped the rope across her chest, right above those perfect little tits, his head felt clearer than it had in a long while.

His hands moved automatically, going through the familiar motions of bringing the bight to the center of her back, then pulling the rest of the rope through the bight before reversing directions. He brought the rope back around her body below the first wrap, careful not to overlap them or allow for any twists in the line. He threaded the remaining line through the double bight at her spine, then tied a half hitch.

“Okay?” Luke asked, admiring the way the remaining rope hung, perfectly in line with her spine.

“Yes,” Genesis breathed, and Luke could smell the honey undertones of her scent intensifying.

That smell threatened to bring Luke to his knees. She was turned on and he was already ravenous. He wouldn’t last much longer without taking her, but he wanted to do one more tie.

“You look so beautiful like this, Buttercup,” he purred, leaning to press a kiss right below her ear. She shivered in response, her scent rising. “All tied up like you’re mine to do with as I please.”

“I am,” Genesis said, her voice even huskier than usual. “I’m yours and I want to please you.”

Luke felt an electric thrill course through his veins. He worked more quickly now, using the remaining line to bind her wrists behind her in a double column tie. He stepped back to admire his work, circling her to take her in from every angle.

She was perfect.

“Okay?” he asked again, squatting in front of her to look into her big, trusting eyes. This time, that trust gave him a sense of pride and satisfaction rather than fear.

“Yes, Daddy,” Genesis answered, plump lips parted invitingly.

Luke kissed her then, meaning for it to be a quick thing. It wasn’t. As soon as his mouth met hers, he needed more. He kissed her desperately, one hand gripping her throat as the other traced a path down her torso and across her hip before settling on her ass. He put everything into that kiss—his fear, his uncertainty, his hope. Hope he didn’t know he had in him because he’d buried it so completely. But Genesis had watered it, shone on it, forced it to grow.

“Fuck,” he growled, pulling away. “Goddamn you, woman. You foolish, perfect creature. How was I ever supposed to quit you?”

Genesis smiled, a lovely thing that set his heart on fire. How had he ever believed he could let her go? Why had he even tried?

“I love you Luke Wyatt,” she said.

And that was it. He was done for.

“I want you to stay,” Luke managed to choke out. Then he did something that surprised them both. He burst into tears.

Luke hadn’t cried in a long time. It felt like a million pounds of dead weight poured out of his eyes as he pulled Genesis into his arms and wept. She laid her head against his neck, and he knew she’d have wrapped her arms around him if her wrists weren’t bound. Still, having her pressed against him, accepting him with all his flaws, was all he needed. It was more than enough.

When he’d regained his composure enough to stand, he pulled Genesis to her feet with him. He yanked her panties down her legs, his other hand already loosening his belt and pants. He lifted her from the ground, carrying her to the nearest stable surface, which happened to be the ladder to the loft. As soon as he’d set her on it, he lined his cock up with her entrance and shoved inside, finding her wet and ready.

Genesis cried out as he thrust into her again and again, hard and fast. He could feel everything in him unraveling, every piece of him crumbling and being put back together to make something new. He plunged deep into her pussy, gripping her ass as he drove into her, wanting to give her everything he had and everything he was and everything he would ever be.

“Oh, god! Oh, Luke!” Genesis moaned. Her pussy squeezed his cock, and his balls tightened, belly clenching as he gave himself over to sensation.

She came, drenching his cock, her pussy gripping his shaft like she owned it. And fuck if he could claim otherwise. He was hers. Maybe he had been all along.

Luke gave a last hard thrust before his swelling knot locked into place and he came with his face buried in her neck. It felt like any remaining emotion he hadn’t cried out was now shooting out in the cum he filled her with, leaving him lighter than he’d felt in ages. He inhaled her delicious scent as her pussy milked his knot, coaxing out every drop of his seed.

Luke reached around her, untying the rope around her wrists with practiced ease, before leaning back to unwind it from her torso. He rubbed her arms and wrists, making sure he hadn’t bruised her or cut off her circulation. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, staring up into his eyes.

“Your packmates are right about you. You do choose jackassery every time,” Genesis said, that familiar snark back in her voice. “But for some reason, we love you anyway.”

Luke kissed her again and it felt less terrifying. It felt natural and right, like breathing. It felt like a new beginning.