10. Zara

Feeling Liam's eyes on me as I walk up the stairs is unnerving. It's different to the way Benjamin looked at me. His was scrutiny, sizing me up as a caregiver to his daughter. This is… heated. I won't deny it sends a thrill rushing through me. His scent notwithstanding, I find him attractive. He is fun and cute and the total opposite of Eddie. He wants to build, not break. But two things are holding me back, and one of them is currently standing at the changing table, cooing to his baby daughter. The other, well, let's just say I'm gun-shy after being gaslighted for all those months. Even though in my head I know Liam isn't Eddie, my heart just can't take another knock. It's already taking it all it can from Benjamin's brusqueness.

"I'll make her up a bottle," I murmur as I step into the room.

Benjamin only nods and carries on with his undivided attention to Mia. I set about prepping the bottle and watching as the hot water gushes into it, followed by the longer cooler water. This really is a marvel machine. Prepping by hand hours in advance is a real ball ache, truth be told.

Twisting the top on, I hand it to him as he settles into the armchair with her.

Benjamin's eyes flick up to mine for just a moment as he takes the bottle, and there's something there, something unreadable that makes me pause.

"About Liam…" he starts and stops as I give him a curious stare.

"What about him?" Oh God, does he know Liam asked me out?

"Take what he says with a grain of salt."

"What does that mean?"

"When he was talking about showing you around. Don't expect it. He's?—"

"What?"

Benjamin glares at me for making him say it, but I need more information than he is currently providing.

"A serial dater." His gaze hardens when he finally meets my eyes. "I don't want you thinking there's anything to his flirting."

I press my lips together, desperately holding onto the laugh that needs to come out. "Thanks," I choke out. "I can take care of myself."

"It's more for Mia's sake. I don't want him driving you away."

And there it is. He's not jealous, but he knows he has a good thing going here with me.

"I'm not going anywhere, and, for the record, it'll take a lot more than a few flirty comments from a cute guy to send me packing."

Something flicks across his face, but it's gone before I can see what it is. He nods and drops his gaze back to Mia. That's my cue to beat it.

"I'll get dinner on. Spaghetti Bolognese, okay?"

"Yes."

I roll my eyes and turn to the door.

"Thanks."

Snickering at the afterthought, I stick my thumb up, but don't turn back around. "No worries," I chirp and hastily make my way back downstairs, contemplating his remarks about Liam. They're not off-putting in the sense that I refuse to date alphas who like the omegas. There are things to consider, like the rut. It's not likely a single alpha is going to sit around and suffer through his rut, needing a knot when he can find a willing omega to stick his cock into. I wonder briefly about Benjamin's rut and how he plans to deal with that now that he has been rejected. But then I find this train of thought a bit weird and shake my head, gathering up the ingredients for the Bolognese.

The sizzle of the onions as they hit the pan is oddly satisfying. I focus on the task at hand, dicing tomatoes and adding them to the pan. Cooking is therapeutic, and soon, the smell of the sauce is making my mouth water. Stirring it gently, I put a pan of water on to boil before adding the spaghetti and glancing at the clock. Benjamin should be down soon.

When more time passes, and the spaghetti is ready, I chew my lip. He's still not come down. Draining it off, I throw it in the sauce to keep it from ruining and head up to the nursery.

The sight that greets me makes my stomach do a flip-flop. Benjamin is fast asleep in the armchair, his shirt unbuttoned, and Mia's chubby little cheek pressed against his chest while she sleeps. The skin-to-skin contact is adorable, and the fact that he knows what his daughter needs is heart-warming.

Not wanting to disturb them, I back out and pull the door softly closed. Going back to the kitchen, I dish up my dinner and eat it at the kitchen island, messing about on my phone. By the time I'm finished and have tidied up, Benjamin still hasn't come down. I leave the Spag Bol in the pan, where he can warm it later if he comes down and head to the lounge to read my book for a bit. It's the first time I've really had some time on my own where I wasn't sleeping. My mind wanders back to Liam, and I feel more and more as if this is something I want to explore. Slowly. A walk to the lake in the afternoon or coffee somewhere close by. But Benjamin won't like it, and that is something that I have to consider regardless of whether it's really his business who I date or not. If he's paying me to take care of his daughter, then I absolutely have to take his feelings into account.

Liam's idea of not telling Benjamin isn't a good one. Secrets come out, and it will probably be worse if Benjamin finds out later. But is that the only way I'll get to meet up with Liam? Maybe secrets at the beginning while we figure shit out aren't the worst idea.

"Fuck," I mutter, flinging my head back against the couch. I've been here for two days and already things are getting complicated.

The more I think about it, the more my head spins with the ‘what-ifs' and potential complications of getting involved with not just an alpha, but Liam. He's got charm by the bucketload, but as Benjamin pointed out—there's a trail of broken hearts in his wake.

I shove the thoughts aside and try to focus on my book, but the words blur on the page. I can't seem to shake off the image of Benjamin asleep with Mia, nor can I ignore the slight twinge in my chest at how cute it is. For an alpha who's been through hell recently, he's holding up like a trooper.

The clock ticks away, and eventually, my eyelids grow heavy. Stretching out on the couch, I decide I'll shut my eyes for just a moment…

"Zara?" The soft voice snaps my eyes open, and I blink to find Benjamin standing over me. "Sorry to wake you. I just wanted to say thanks for dinner."

"No problem," I yawn, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. "Mia sleeping okay?"

"Yeah. I've put her in her cot."

"I'll go up. I'm beat."

"Uhm…" He says, giving me a weird stare.

"What is it?" I ask, wondering if I have Bolognese sauce up my face.

"I put the crib in your room. I hope that's okay. I just thought with you sleeping in the armchair… it's not good for getting any rest, and I know Mia is up half the night, so?—"

"Thanks," I cut off his rambling with a smile. "I appreciate that."

"Just say," he says with an intense stare that gives me goosebumps. "Don't suffer because I'm not thinking far enough ahead."

"Okay," I say with a nod. "I will. Thanks."

He nods and moves past me toward the kitchen. "Night Zara."

"Good night, Benjamin."

I watch him disappear into the kitchen. Maybe there's more softness under that rough-around-the-edges exterior than I gave him credit for.

Dragging myself off the couch, I plod upstairs to my room. A little smile tugs at my lips when I see the crib nestled in the corner; it makes the space feel more like home. The baby monitor is on the bedside cabinet. Mia is sound asleep, her tiny chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm that calms me more than any meditation app ever could.

I change into my pyjamas and slide into bed, listening to the quiet of the house settle around me like a familiar blanket. My mind keeps rewinding to Benjamin's face when he was thanking me. It makes me wonder if we could become friends despite the awkward start.

As I settle down and try to sleep, my mind drifts back to Liam. Tall, confident Liam with that cheeky grin plastered across his stupidly handsome face.

What am I doing even considering getting involved with someone who could potentially bring drama into this already complicated household? Still, part of me buzzes with excitement at the thought of seeing him again.

I'll sleep on it and see how I feel about it in the morning.