32. Harrison

32

Harrison

W hen I get upstairs, my room is empty. There's no sign of Ava on the third floor, and I have a sinking suspicion I know exactly where she is.

Rushing down the stairs, I find her in the hall outside of Meggie's room. My instincts tell me to run to Meggie and make sure she's okay, but I can smell Nils's fresh scent in the hall and know he's with her. I tamp down on the odd alpha protectiveness our new beta riles up and move towards Ava.

"What were you doing?"

"Oh, just setting your beta in her place." She walks towards me with a little extra swing to her hips. "Now, should we go up to your room? It's been way too long since…"

Her hand drags down my body to graze over my dick. My soft dick.

I step away. "That's not what we'll be doing."

No longer caring if we don't have privacy, I drag Ava back downstairs to the entryway. I want this over with and her out of here as quickly as possible. "What did you say to Meggie?"

"It doesn't matter." She twists her arm in my grip and frowns, finally picking up on my mood. "Harrison, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" I drop her arm and pace a few steps away, huffing in frustration. "What's wrong? Seriously?"

She follows me, rubbing my back, but I jerk away.

"You helped yourself to a key to my house without asking!"

"I didn't think you'd mind." There's a furrow to her brow. She genuinely believes what she's saying. "We've been together for over a year. I just figured—"

"What? That this was serious? Ava, I've told you over and over, I'm not looking for something serious. I don't want to bond someone." Even as the words come out of my mouth, an image enters my mind that makes my blood stir with an inexplicable longing. Me, bonding Meggie. I shake the thought from my head. I like Meggie—a lot more than I like Ava—but we don't have that kind of relationship.

Ava drops her eyes. "I thought—"

"What did you say to Meggie?" I repeat, needing to know.

"I just made it clear that your pack doesn't want a beta. I only told her what you told me."

"What you didn't believe applied to you! You did it just to hurt her, didn't you?"

Ava's posture straightens, shoulders moving back. "Why would it hurt her unless she thinks it's a possibility? Is it a possibility, Harrison? Would you bond her instead of me, your own girlfriend?"

"I'm not sexually attracted to Meggie, but I'd rather have her in my pack than you." The words are cold. Colder than I intended.

Ava recoils. "This is the end, isn't it?"

I swallow and look away. There's hurt in Ava's voice that I don't want to look at too closely. I don't want to feel empathy for her. I'm still too angry. She invaded Meggie's space, said who knows what with the intention of hurting her, and made a fucking key to my house!

"We're over, Ava." There's no bite to my words, but they're covered in finality.

"Harrison, please," she begs. "I didn't mean any harm. I just… I love you."

I run my hands through my hair and shake my head. "You don't love me."

"I do. Please, don't end this. We're good together."

"No, Ava. We've been done for a long time. This isn't love."

"That's not true. I know you love me. You just don't wanna admit it to yourself." She throws her arms around my neck and kisses me. But I pull her off. Tears dampen her eyes. "You still find me attractive. I know you do. And you can't say that about anyone else. Are you really going to settle for taking care of yourself with your own hand for the rest of your life?" Her hand goes to my crotch again. And again I pull away.

"There's more to a relationship than attraction."

"And there's more to us than that too," she argues, but there's not much power in it.

My voice softens. "Ava, when was the last time we just sat and had an actual conversation? When was the last time I made you laugh? Hell, when was the last time we even had sex? I can't remember!"

She doesn't respond, because there's no argument to make.

"We aren't good for each other. The sooner you realize that, the better."

She wipes her tears, pulls a key out of her pocket, and holds it out to me. Deep down, she knows I'm right.

"Good-goodbye, Harrison." Her voice waivers. "I hope you find what you're looking for."