3. Perry

"Idid what you told me to, Ted. Maybe when you're up next, you can remove the panel and double-check."

My friend's voice booms over the phone's speaker while I trim my beard. I've let it get out of hand while helping Leaf with his renovations. I swear a bird could have nested in it, and I'd not even notice.

"I'm sure you did what you needed to, Perry. I'm not heading that way for a while yet, but you can send me some pics if you're worried."

Tapping my shaver on the sink, I toss it to the side and pile my damp towel on the counter.

"Yeah, I'll do that if it gives me any other issues. I checked damn near thirty feet of hose for leaks and nothing."

"And you're sure you didn't hit a water pipe on install? Some of those houses have shitty plumbing and when you renovate it disrupts their joints."

No, I'm not sure, but that's the part I'll keep to myself. We had already tiled the new shower, at Sasha's begging, and it completely slipped my mind. But the leak stopped, so I'm confident it was defective tubing. Mostly.

"I think it's good there. But if I hear anything on that construction project near Leaf, I'll let you know first thing."

"Thanks, buddy. You take care of yourself, okay? Call me anytime."

My throat closes a little, and I nod into the empty room.

"I will, Ted. Thanks."

Ending the call, I walk naked to my bedroom and groan when I notice my basket of clean laundry is now empty. This rush to finish the renovation had me forget all about doing laundry. To be honest, I forget about most things these days. But I'm not out of clean clothes yet, so it's a win.

Sort of.

I have exactly three T-shirts left in my drawer and two aren't appropriate to wear out of the house.

"Maybe I should hire someone to help me out here."

I'm not sure who I'm talking to, but it's a thought that's crossed my mind a few times. But I always stuff it down because help means I can't do it myself. My therapist tells me it's an incorrect thought path and asking for help means you're strong, but I've yet to agree with him on that point.

After pulling on my last clean, appropriate shirt and mostly clean pair of jeans, I grab my keys and head off to my brother's place for dinner. Whenever Leaf invites me for food at his place, I never say no. Especially since he met Sasha and has rejoined society by coming out of his grief.

His life is finally back on track and every time I see him, I want to squeeze the ever-loving stuffing out of him because I'm so happy he's happy. Now, if I could get my life back on track, that would be great.

One thing at a time, as the saying goes.

Parking in the space next to Leaf's truck, I grab the wine bottle from the back seat. It's Sasha's favourite, and I let myself in their private entrance.

"I'm here! And since I'm late, you shouldn't be naked or anything."

I walked in on them once and it set off a fresh wave of nightmares. Nobody needs to see their brother's naked ass… ever.

"Coast is clear!" Leaf's voice carries down the small flight of steps. His apartment sits at the back of the lodge and over the lodge kitchen with an incredible view of the lake. While he has an entrance through the lodge kitchen, he has a private side entrance as well. Since Sasha moved here, there's been a conscious effort to use it more and make it feel more like home and less like work.

One of Sasha's ideas and I think it's a great one.

Bouncing up the stairs with my wine bottle, I step into his open-concept apartment and head straight to the kitchen island where Leaf chops something like a professional chef.

"Do you have to be good at everything?"

Leaf snorts as I place the wine in the fridge and help myself to a beer.

"Anything for me to help with?"

"It's under control. Sasha should be back soon."

"Where is he?"

"He's showing Roman around and bringing him here."

Closing my eyes, I breathe out through my nose. I should have known. Why am I so stupid sometimes? I don't think I've ever had someone get under my skin so instantly, like he did. Sasha has been so excited for this day to come and I had to go be an asshole in record time.

"Cool," I say, but Leaf gives me that look reserved for brothers who are only eleven months apart and know each other too well. "What?"

"Why were you so rude to him? He just got here and I know he's not a horrible person. Just like I know you're sometimes prickly, but Perry, it wasn't like you. He's Sasha's best friend. You need to get along."

"He started it."

Yes. I'm being childish and stubborn, but I don't have any other reason. At least not one that I want to dwell on with an empty stomach.

"Perry, come on. He's coming for dinner and I don't need you two at each other's throats like dogs." He raises an eyebrow as he tosses onions into the pan. "And you started it."

"Land Rovers are a waste of fucking money. He's just another uppity city boy coming here and thinking if he has all the big expensive toys, it will somehow make him immune to whatever the wilderness throws at him."

The lodge guests have been getting progressively worse with that attitude and it's been grating on me. I don't know if it's because people know a supermodel now lives here or they just suddenly feel like making a trip to a mosquito-laden lodge in northern Québec, but it's irritating as fuck. Especially since not a single one of them returned any of my flirting.

"He's not like that, and if you took the time to know him, you'd know that. Roman is Sasha's best friend and you know damn well he'll be crushed if the two of you can't get along." Leaf adds more onions to the pan with butter and flour before stealing a swallow from his nearby beer. "What's gotten into you? Are the nightmares picking up again?"

My brother has a knack for multi-tasking, and right now it's cooking and grilling me. He's always been able to notice when things bother me. Before his husband passed away–god I miss that guy–he always picked up on my moods before me. Now that he's enjoying life again with Sasha, it seems his superpowers are back.

"Your silence speaks for itself, brother. I can wait. When you want to talk, I'll be here."

"I —"

"Baby, we're here!"

Sasha's voice sounds and I watch as my brother's eyes light up as he rushes to meet his partner like they haven't seen each other in weeks. He kisses him soundly and I gulp the beer to drown the little voice that whispers it's what I want. To be kissed like that.

"Man, I need to leave the house more often." Sasha breathes.

Clearing my throat, I smile when Sasha turns my way.

"Perry! You're already here! Did Leaf offer the dip I made just for you?"

"No. Did you…" I can't help the smile as Sasha opens the fridge and sets a vegetable platter on the kitchen island. "Oh man, it's that dilly ranch stuff? The stuff you made before?"

"Yep. Made it just for you." He kisses my cheek before peeling the cover off of the platter.

Unbidden, my eyes water and I cover it up by pretending to choke on my beer.

"You remember Roman?"

Recovering from my fake coughing, I finally acknowledge the other man and immediately wish I hadn't.

Roman, the same mouthy asshole from earlier today, is here. And he sure knows how to make an entrance. Dressed in black leather pants, a crisp white dress shirt and a red corset with black details, he's fucking ravishing.

Until he opens his mouth.

"Oh. I didn't realize he'd be here too."

"Ro! Don't be so rude."

I smirk when Sasha comes to my defence and Roman scowls.

"Sorry. Hi. Are you going to share the dip or just hoard it for yourself?"

Sasha stares open-mouthed at his friend and, I have to admit, even I'm slightly offended.

"I had two carrots. I'd hardly call it hoarding. But I just lost my appetite, anyway."

Sasha cuffs Roman on the back of the head.

"What the fuck, Sasha?"

Roman rubs the spot Sasha smacked with a pout.

"Apologize for that right now. Perry is my friend and you're in my home. If your sisters knew you were acting like this, they'd be doing far more than cuffing you upside the head."

Roman's already alabaster skin pales at the mention of his sisters and he hangs his head.

"I'm sorry, Perry. That was uncalled for, and I didn't mean anything by it."

I nod in acceptance and Sasha claps his hands together.

"Great. Now we start over. Baby, what do you need me to do?"

Sasha and Leaf move into a comfortable rhythm in the kitchen and shoo us into the living room. It's open-concept, so Roman and I aren"t removed from what they're doing. Avoiding speaking directly to each other, we watch Leaf and Sasha until it grows into an awkward silence.

"How was your flight?"

"Good."

He sips from the wineglass Sasha poured for him. Sasha's favourite wine I brought for him.

"Do you like the wine? It's Sasha's favourite."

"It's good."

This will be one painful evening if the level of conversation doesn't pick up. So, instead of trying for more conversation, I study him in between dunking broccoli in the dip and calculating how long is a polite time to pass before I eat and run.

Because fuck this.

The guy hates me and barely knows me. We're off to a horrible first meeting. But I'm not about to tolerate it for longer than I have to if he's not willing to start over. I'm also not ditching my brother's cooking for this guy. Ugh, or Sasha. How did this day get so damn complicated?

Roman turns his head to look around the apartment and I'm drawn to his profile. I admit, he's easy on the eyes. He is, hands down, one of the most beautiful men I've ever met. He's also the first one I've met who wears a corset to dinner as casually as one would a T-shirt from Walmart.

My gaze scans his torso without permission, drawn to the cinched waist and hips and back up to the delicate vine pattern at the shoulders.

"Did you have another question?" His cool blue eyes meet mine over his wineglass as he takes a sip. He caught me looking and knows it.

"No."

Yes. But now is not the time to ask.

"Dinner is ready!" Sasha interrupts and thank god for once his timing is impeccable because I'm still staring at Roman.

We all gather at the table and Leaf tells Roman how he loves cooking a roast for family dinner and it's his favourite meal to make.

"Reminds me of when we were kids," I say with a smile, and Leaf nods.

"Yeah, I loved the time in the kitchen helping mom. She taught me how to make the gravy."

Sunday family dinners like this were a highlight of our childhood. Our family was small but close and I cherish those times. When Leaf announced he bought property and was moving here permanently, even though our parents were already gone, I didn't want our traditions to fall away.

We tried our best with our careers to keep up some semblance of tradition, but our meetups were sparse. He was my big brother though and I couldn't just let him move away, so I did what was best. I moved here to be close to the only blood family I had left. By doing so, I also left the career I had made a priority in my life. But it had taken a toll on me and the move came at the best possible time.

"I'm glad you did. I love your onion gravy. It really is just like mom's."

I pour more of it on my roast beef. I'd put this stuff on everything if Leaf made it for me every day.

"Leaf has told me about learning to cook with your mom. I think that's why I enjoy being in the kitchen with Millie so much. I never had the home stability like that with my mom. She had us moving so often and she worked all the time with her art. Dinner was often whatever was frozen."

Sasha has mentioned many times to me how much he wished he had the idyllic suburban family life that Leaf and I enjoyed. But he still loves hearing our stories even if it makes him a little sad.

"I tried to cook with mom once, but it was a disaster." Laughing, I point to Leaf, who's trying not to laugh along with me and failing.

"The blender. Oh, my god. She was so mad at you."

Leaf wipes a tear from his eye as he laughs.

"She didn't tell me it needed a lid!"

"There was batter on the ceiling for years. Might even still be there." Leaf snorts.

Sasha sips his wine and smiles, basking in the memories Leaf and I sometimes get lost in. But Roman remains quiet. His blue eyes trained on his plate as he pushes food around rather than eating it.

Sasha whispers in his ear and Roman shakes his head before topping up his wine and joining the conversation with a fake smile.

"Your mom sounds wonderful, and it's an amazing meal, Leaf. Thank you so much for inviting me. I'd love to take you to a fantastic steak house this week when you take me to the Land Rover dealership to say thank you. It's not as good as you make, but I bet you'll love it."

Leaf closes his eyes with a groan.

"Shit. That was to be Wednesday, wasn't it?" He looks to Sasha for confirmation.

"Yes, but I can choose a different day if it's better."

"With all the renovations happening, I pushed off the meetings I have with supplying syrup to a grocery store and a restaurant chain. I could try the following week?"

Roman, to his credit, hides his disappointment well.

"Oh, it's okay. I don't want to bother more than I have. I can look for an Uber driver or something to take me."

I can't help the snort and Roman glares at me.

"Do you have something to say or just being rude again?"

With a sigh, I let the jab pass and attempt politeness.

"You can't get an Uber to take you to the city. Even if you can afford it, they likely won't wait while you buy a car. But people don't get Ubers here. I think the town has two taxis to its name. If you don't mind going Tuesday, I'll take you."

His eyes widen while his mouth opens and closes and I keep eating. Because I honestly don't care if he takes my offer or not. I'm just trying to smooth shit over here for the sake of my brother and Sasha.

"Um, yeah, thanks. I'd appreciate that."

Sasha beams like I just gave him a new puppy and my brother, well… he's clearly got questions for me.

And I don't have a single answer.