27. Jace

27

JACE

A s Alec walks away, I exhale a long breath, feeling a strange sense of relief wash over me. Tessa's finally leaving us alone. No more drama, no more tension—just us focusing on the frat, on the toy drive, and on making Sigma Theta what we've always wanted it to be. It's exactly what we needed, what I needed.

But as the days pass and I throw myself into the final days of the toy drive, something feels off. I keep catching myself drifting back to thoughts of Tessa—memories flashing through my mind when I least expect it.

I find myself thinking about that night in my room when we stayed up late after the Halloween party. She sat cross-legged on my bed, her hair falling loose over her shoulders, laughing at some dumb joke I made. For once, I wasn't trying to be charming or cool. I didn't need to. With her, it wasn't about impressing anyone, just…being.

And we talked about stuff I never told anyone—not even Devin or Alec. About my dad's expectations, about how sometimes I felt like I was suffocating under the pressure to be perfect. She didn't judge. She just listened, her eyes soft, understanding.

And then there was that time during midterms. I was stressed out, sleep-deprived, and ready to snap, but she showed up with coffee and stayed with me while I studied. She didn't say much—didn't have to. It was like she just knew I needed someone there.

I shake my head, trying to snap myself out of it. None of that matters anymore. Tessa's in the past. I need to stop letting her take up space in my head.

I set up another donation bin and check my phone. There's a text from Aubrey, the girl I'd lined up a date with. I glance at the time. I'm supposed to meet her at the campus café in twenty minutes. This is good, I tell myself. A distraction. Something new to focus on.

But when I walk into the café and spot Aubrey sitting by the window, it already doesn't feel right. She waves and smiles, and I force a smile back, sliding into the seat across from her.

"Hey," she says, her voice bright, too bright. "I got us a table by the window. Isn't it cozy here?"

"Yeah, it's nice," I mumble, tugging at my collar. The air feels thick, like it's pressing in on me. I reach for the menu, pretending to look it over, even though I already know I'm not hungry.

"So, I was thinking we could split the croissant," she continues, flipping through the dessert options. "And maybe try the peppermint mocha? Or are you more of a black coffee kind of guy?"

"Uh, black coffee's fine," I say, distracted, my eyes darting around the café. I notice how she keeps fidgeting with her hair, twisting it around her finger, her laugh coming out too high-pitched. It's awkward, as though she's trying too hard to fill the space between us. And no matter how much she talks, I can't focus. My mind keeps drifting back to Tessa.

Aubrey starts telling me about her group project for marketing, but her words seem to filter right through me. My foot taps restlessly under the table. This isn't working. The conversation feels like I'm wading through mud, heavy and slow. Every attempt to connect falls flat.

I glance out the window, and suddenly, my heart stutters. Tessa. She's walking by with her head down, bundled in a heavy coat, looking like she's in a hurry.

Without thinking, I push my chair back. "Uh, excuse me for a sec."

"What? Where are you going?" Aubrey looks up, surprised.

"I'll be right back," I mumble, already halfway to the door.

As I step outside, the cold air hits me, and I spot Tessa again, moving quickly down the street. I jog to catch up with her.

"Tessa!" I call out.

She hesitates for a split second but doesn't stop, just walks faster, her shoulders hunched against the cold.

"Tessa, wait!" I try again, closing the gap between us.

She finally turns around, her face blank, eyes wary. "Jace," she says, her voice flat. "What do you want?"

"I just…wanted to talk," I say, the words catching in my throat. Seeing her again sends a jolt of something through me, something I've been trying to ignore for weeks now.

Her eyes flick toward the café, then back to me. "I have nothing to say to you."

I frown, feeling the distance between us like a physical barrier. "Can we just…I don't know, talk for a minute? I wanted to?—"

"I have to go." Her tone sharpens, and before I can say another word, she's already walking away again, disappearing into the crowd.

I stand there for a long moment, staring after her. The cold seeps in, numbing me from the outside in. I should feel relieved, right? She's finally leaving us alone, finally backing off like we wanted.

But all I feel is this strange, hollow ache in my chest. I can't even bring myself to walk back into the café and finish my date with Audrey—Aubrey! Shit, I was already forgetting her name.

So I take off, silently apologizing to the girl for ghosting her but knowing I need to hide away for a little while.

The cold bites at my cheeks, but I barely feel it. My head's somewhere else—still stuck on the way Tessa walked out, how she didn't even give me a chance to talk to her.

By the time I get back to the frat house, it's mostly quiet. A few guys are probably out celebrating the holidays early, but I'm not in the mood to join them. I trudge upstairs, close the door behind me, and kick off my shoes. The bed's calling my name, so I flop down, staring at the ceiling, trying to push it all out of my head—the disaster of a date, my conversation with Alec, and seeing Tessa earlier.

But no matter how hard I try, I can't get her out of my mind.

Tessa. The way she looked at me outside the café—eyes guarded, lips tight like she was keeping something back. She didn't even stick around long enough for me to say anything. Just left me standing there like an idiot.

I roll over, shoving my face into the pillow. Get over it, man. Move on . But it's useless.

Her face keeps flashing in my mind. I recall the day I had her in my room, her strawberry blonde curls bouncing as she rode my cock, the way her cheeks flushed pink.

Tessa is beautiful in this classic way, like some kind of pinup from days gone by. The kind of beauty that sticks with you, even when you don't want it to.

I try to stop, but I can't help remembering the way she and I frantically rutted into each other, desire coursing through our veins. I couldn't stop wanting her even then.

I close my eyes, sinking deeper into the memory. I can picture it now, watching her breasts jiggle in front of me, perky and inviting. If only I'd feasted on them when I had the chance.

Reaching into the bedside drawer, I pull out a toy, a vibrating cock sleeve, and squirt a generous amount of lube inside before placing it on and flicking the switch. It starts up and I groan, lost in the sensations as I imagine the toy to be Tessa's wet pussy. It feels so good to thrust into it, imagining burying myself deep inside her once more.

It isn't just the sex, either. There's something electric about being with her. I feel connected in a way I've never felt before. It's like she was made for me in some way. I swallow hard as I let my hips buck into the feeling once more, stroking the toy up and down on my sensitive shaft.

I'm already close and I've barely begun. I stop, trying to hold off as long as possible, and let myself relax before starting up again, this time imagining how good it felt to fuck Tessa's tight little hole. It was like heaven and I never wanted to leave. My hips pick up speed as I recall the way her ass clenched so sweetly around me, so tight. My cock pulses, so hard that it's almost painful now. One hand reaches down to tug at my balls, adding to the overwhelming sensations I'm already feeling.

My head arches back as I come, filling the toy until my essence is trickling out. I pull it off and clean up hastily, then lay back down on the bed.

As I come down from my high, my throat tightens, and I swallow hard, trying to push the ache down.

Fuck. I shouldn't be thinking about her like this. We've screwed up too much. Crossed too many lines. But no matter how hard I try, she keeps creeping back into my thoughts, haunting me when I'm alone. She was the perfect girl and we threw her away for the good of the fraternity.

We don't even deserve her.

I roll onto my back again, staring at the ceiling. My chest feels heavy, like there's a weight sitting on it, and I can't shake it.

I can't forget her. And deep down, I don't think I want to.

Just then, Devin knocks on the door, calling out for me. I jump up, grab a pair of sweatpants, and tug them on, trying to pretend I wasn't just masturbating while thinking of Tessa.

When I open the door, Devin asks me a question but my head isn't in it. I answer him but my mind is elsewhere, lingering on Tessa. I think I might be falling for her, but I've already screwed up any chance we might have had.