Chapter 30

CHAPTER THIRTY

Maddie

I wish I could have this conversation with Roman and not cry.

I wish my heart wasn’t breaking in two in my chest.

But I can feel the tears streaming down my cheeks and my chest aches with all the hurt and pain.

Everything has been a lie.

I was wrong.

The pain in this moment was not worth it. I should go back to hiding in my house. Except that…

This one little adventure out is about to cost me everything.

It takes every ounce of strength I possess not to sink to the floor again. On trembling legs, I carefully make my way into the closet so that I don’t bump into anything else. I’m going to be covered in bruises.

Not that I care.

As much as I’d like to retreat to my home and never leave again, I don’t even know how long I have before I’m tossed out.

I stop again, drawing in a ragged breath that breaks into a sob. I am the broken bird. The girl with no brains, just bashing her own wings as she flutters into danger with no way of escape. I rushed into this mess with Roman with my foolish heart right on my sleeve.

Gentle hands touch my arms. “Please, Maddie. Don’t go. Not like this.”

“Why not?” I whisper. “I’ve got nothing left to give. You’ve taken everything.”

His hands pull away like I’ve burned them. Is he hurt? That’s rich. “The city is not taking your house.”

That makes my breath stop in my lungs. “The city would beg to differ.”

“I won’t let it happen. There is no way.”

My throat burns from the tears and I shake my head swallowing down the lump. “Don’t make me promises you won’t keep.”

“I’m keeping this one,” he rumbles. “I’m keeping all of them. The one where I promised to care for you. Love you. Your house. The animal sanctuary. All those promises are yours.”

I shake my head, his words soothing a bit of my hurt. “How could I ever trust you again?”

“I don’t know,” he answers back. “But I’d like a chance to try.”

The tears have made my already-poor vision so blurred, I can’t see a thing. But I hear the hangers rustle. And then I feel his hands on my calves.

“Rest your hands on my shoulders and step into the dress. I’m holding it out for you.” I do as he commands because I don’t know how else I’m getting dressed.

But I can tell by the feel of the fabric on my foot that it isn’t the dress I wore on the date. It’s a soft stretchy cotton that glides over my skin.

“Roman,” his helping me is not helping. It only confuses me. His care has always confused me. Then again, I’m pretty sure he takes care of people even when he doesn’t like them. I think of what he told me about his mother last night.

More tears are falling, but I try to swallow them back as I allow him to close the buttons at the bust. Lucia will be here soon and the faster I’m outside, the quicker this will all be over.

He taps my foot and slides on a ballet flat. And not the ones I came in. “This isn’t the clothing I asked for.”

“I know, sweetheart, but you’re upset. You should be comfortable.”

I let out a huff of frustration. “That wasn’t your decision to make.”

“Other foot.” I click my tongue but place a hand back on his shoulder to let him place the shoe on my foot. The really annoying part is that both the flats and the dress are very comfortable and the clothing itself is soothing some of my raw edges.

As are his hands on my skin.

I’ve gone silent, I don’t even know what to say. Thank you? I hate you? I shake my head. What a mess.

Reaching for my hand, he tugs me out of the closet and back into the bathroom. “I’m going to brush your hair.”

“Stop.” But my voice lacks conviction. “I don’t want your help.”

“I know what I’ve broken,” he says close to my ear. “And I know you might never forgive me. But let me fix the house first. Right now. Please.”

My mouth opens and closes. I don’t want anything more from him. Then again, this is a problem he made. It seems fair to let him fix it. “Fine.”

“When Lucia gets here, we’ll all go to Kincaid Enterprises.” He clears his throat. “And just so you know. I didn’t keep the address of my place from you to isolate you. I wanted to keep you safe from the Vendettis. They know Lucia, so telling her was a safety threat. I have always wanted to keep you safe. And you are safest with me.”

I shake my head. “I can’t stay here with you.”

“And what about Thomasina?”

My chin notches. “She comes with me. Lucia can help me care for the sick kitten.”

“I won’t argue.” He starts brushing my hair. “I can’t stop you from leaving. I won’t. But just know, you’ll see me camped outside your house until this is all done.”

I bite the inside of my cheek to keep my heart from leaping in my chest. He can’t mean it.

And I shouldn’t be pleased by his words. But some part of me is…

Hair done, he turns away and walks out of the bathroom. I follow, unsure of what to do with myself in the quiet aftermath. Cry more? Yell? Leave and wait downstairs?

He shrugs on jeans and one of the collared shirts I love too much, leaving it untucked.

We’re down on the sidewalk two minutes later, just as an Uber pulls up in front of the building.

“Maddie!” Lucia cries, jumping out of the car. She crashes into me, her arms wrapping about me.

I bury my face in her neck. “I missed you.”

“Me too,” she answers, squeezing me tight.

“Hey man,” I hear Josh say. “I’m Josh Anderson, Lucia’s husband.”

“Roman Kincaid, nice to meet you.”

Lucia pulls back. “This isn’t a social call, Josh. Don’t talk to him!”

“Luc,” Josh soothes. “Let’s not get carried away. We don’t know?—”

“It’s all right, Josh. I deserve all of Lucia’s anger.” Roman clears his throat. “Let me pay for the Uber. I just asked Maddie if all of us could go to Kincaid Enterprises to make certain that Maddie’s house remains in her care.”

“Is that what you want?” Lucia asks me. I can hear that she is still furious.

I nod. “Then we’ll have to come back here and get Thomasina and the kittens.”

“Seriously?” Lucia lets out a long breath. “This is not how I break up with men.”

I’ve been around for a few of Lucia’s breakups. And calmly leaving a situation is not her style.

I find myself holding back a smile as I think of the guy she dated before Josh.

“What kind of breakups do you go for?” Roman asks.

Lucia squeezes my hand. “I’m more of a throw-their-shit-out-the-third-story-window kind of girl.”

“Glad we didn’t break up,” Josh mutters.

I never expected to smile in this moment but there it is. The smallest grin pulling at my lips.

Because Josh isn’t wrong.

And having my friends here has added some perspective. Everything seems less crazy and more normal.

Even Roman’s behavior. Roman lied to me as he tried to balance his business and the loss of his cousin and best friend. He manipulated me too. And it was inconsiderate, bordering on mean.

He told me yesterday that he needed me to teach him how to use his heart. His words suddenly make sense and my jaw clenches as I realize something else.

I’m not going back to Roman’s place. I’m going home. But Roman might actually need me as much as I’ve needed him.