Chapter 31

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

T hey came to the edge of the forest, and she led Magnus up a steep path that was rocky and narrow that led to the rocky cliffs above the sea. The sky was starting to lighten above them as the night began to relinquish its hold on the world. Magnus was normally an early riser, but the sun had usually crested the horizon in the east by the time he got out of bed. Walking through the pre-dawn darkness was something new to him. If not for the biting cold wind that blew in off the sea and chilled him to the bone, Magnus might have thought he was dreaming.

“Ye ken how dangerous this is, eh?” he asked.

“Dangerous how?”

“’Tis still dark. Ye could fall in a hole—somethin’ ye’ve got experience with, I might add.”

“’Tis nae funny,” she said, but laughed anyway.

Her laughter was high and rang like music in his ears. It was a beautiful sound and one he enjoyed hearing. It was a sound he could get used to hearing more of. When Domhnall offered Ciara her freedom from Dunvegan and she’d opted to stay, he’d been surprised. She had been so anxious to leave, Magnus thought for sure she would go. But she hadn’t. And deep down, Magnus had been glad she had decided to stay.

He didn’t know how long she would remain at Dunvegan, but as the days passed, he grew more and more comfortable with her and his desire for her to stay increased. The more time they spent together, the more he didn’t want her to leave. Magnus felt comfortable around her in ways he’d never felt comfortable around other people. Not even his siblings. She seemed to see him for who he was and not for what others expected him to be. Plus, she made him laugh, which was something that had been a rarity in his life.

The only time he had felt truly uncomfortable around her was just a little while before, when she’d seen him without his clothes on. He’d noticed that her gaze had lingered on his naked form, which even now, made him squirm. Magnus wasn’t a modest man. Not really. But he also wasn’t an improper man and Ciara witnessing him nude, when they were not intimate, was the height of impropriety. The mere thought of it brought a rush of heat to his face.

As mortified about the entire situation as he’d been though, what he couldn’t get out of his head was the way she’d looked at him. The fact that she hadn’t turned away and that he’d seen a hunger in her eyes that mirrored the way he felt whenever he looked at her. Whenever their eyes met, he felt a spark of heat crackle through his entire body. He’d felt that again when she was staring at him that morning. Magnus knew it was inappropriate and would never act on it, but he couldn’t just pretend he hadn’t seen it either.

“Where are we goin’? Are ye leadin’ me tae the end of the bleedin’ earth?” he finally asked, just to get his mind off the situation in his bedchamber.

“Have ye always been this impatient?”

“Well… aye”

“Sounds like ‘tis time tae teach ye some patience then,” she replied.

“Bleedin’ hell, woman, is there anythin’ ye dinnae think ye need tae teach me?”

“It daesnae sound like it,” she said with a laugh.

Ciara’s laughter was abruptly cut off though, as her foot hit a pile of loose rocks, and she started to fall. Magnus watched in horror as she pinwheeled her arms, trying to catch her balance before she tumbled onto the rocky trail where she was sure to split her head open. He dashed forward and as Ciara fell, he dove forward with his arms outstretched. Magnus caught her before she hit the stones beneath her and rolled. He winced and grimaced as the rocks dug into his back, but he managed to roll far enough to get them off the path and into the softer grass beside it.

With his arms around her waist, she lay on top of him, her face just inches from his, her eyes wide. She looked stricken and almost as if she realized just how close she’d come to being badly hurt. Their gazes were locked and Magnus found himself swimming in her emerald green eyes. He was getting lost in them and found the weight of her body on his to be pleasant. Feeling her pressed against him now, as in the river and again in the corridor, was hypnotic and it made his belly churn in ways it never had before.

Her eyes burned with an intensity that scorched Magnus’ soul, and her lips were so close, all he would have to do was pull her down an inch, even less. He wanted to kiss her, more than anything he’d ever wanted in his entire life. And the way she was looking at him, Magnus thought she wanted it as well. Time seemed to stand still, the world around them frozen entirely. All that existed was the two of them, their lips scant inches from each other. All he had to do was raise his head and press his lips to hers.

Thunder rumbled in the distance and seemed to pull him out of the moment, the bubble they’d existed in popping with an almost audible noise. Magnus lowered his head and cut his eyes away from her, taking a beat to gather himself.

“Are ye all right?” he asked.

She nodded but couldn’t hide the light of disappointment in her eyes. “Aye. I’m fine.”

“We should probably get back tae Dunvegan.”

Ciara frowned but got to her feet. Magnus followed suit and let his gaze fall to his boots, unable to meet her eyes. But she took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze and when he looked up again, she was smiling and the mischievous glint in her eyes had returned.

“Nae yet. I still havenae shown ye what I brought ye out here tae see,” she said. “But we need tae hurry.”

“Ciara, I think?—”

“And that’s the problem with ye, Magnus. Ye’re always thinkin’,” she said. “’Tis time ye learned tae nae think and just let go. Tae just dae. Live a little and have some fun with me.”

Magnus immediately had misgivings about this entire little excursion. Being out before dawn, climbing the steep and unsteady path to the cliffs above Dunvegan seemed like folly. But mostly, the moment they’d just shared left Magnus feeling a bit strange and he thought he needed a little time away from Ciara. He wanted some time to himself to get his head back on straight and banish the voices that were echoing through his mind, trying to persuade him to kiss Ciara or give in to the temptation that coursed through his veins.

His urges were inappropriate. They were wrong and he couldn’t give in to his passions, no matter how desperately he wanted to. It just wouldn’t be proper or, for all he knew, welcome. Just because he wanted to believe he saw his own desires reflected in Ciara’s eyes didn’t mean he actually had, and he would never force himself on a woman. That was the sort of barbarity he’d seen English soldiers inflict upon more than a few Scotswomen and Magnus would never be party to that sort of behavior. That wasn’t his way.

“Are ye comin’?” Ciara asked.

Without waiting for his reply, she turned and started up the path again. Magnus watched her for a moment with a clenched jaw, fearing she was going to lose her footing again. She seemed to be a little steadier on her feet though and was picking her way along the stony path carefully. Magnus let out a frustrated breath and shook his head.

“Bleedin’ hell. She’s more stubborn than a mule,” he muttered.

The wind picked up as they climbed the path and Magnus shivered. Ciara was smiling though and didn’t seem to notice the cold. She turned and looked over her shoulder, making sure he was following. Magnus’ heart tripped over itself as he thought she had never looked more beautiful than she did in that moment.

“How much further?” he asked.

“Nae much. Quit whinin’ and keep climbin’,” she teased.

He grumbled but kept following her. When they reached a branch in the trail though, he paused and watched as she followed the branch in the path that led to a ledge on the cliff face. His heart dropped into his belly, and he felt an icy fist of fear for her grab hold of his heart and squeeze. He shook his head.

“Ciara, get away from that ledge,” he called. “The wind up here will blow ye right off!”

“Come. ‘Tis beautiful up here. Especially now.”

“Get off there and come back here.”

She giggled and stuck her tongue out at him then took a first step out onto the rock ledge. It was wide enough to walk normally, but the drop from the ledge to the rocky shoreline below was at least a hundred feet. There would be no surviving a fall from that height. And with the gusts of wind that blew in off the ocean, the footing could be treacherous. He had seen people nearly fall from ledges before and it was why he had always avoided it. Between the wind and slippery stones, it was all too easy to lose one’s footing out there.

“Are ye comin’ or nae?” Ciara shouted over the wind.

“I’m nae.”

“Dinnae be a bairn. Come out here with me.”

“Ye’re goin’ tae fall.”

“I havenae yet,” she called back.

“Yet? Ye’ve done this before?”

“Aye!” she said with a laugh. “How’d ye think I kent tae bring ye here, ye fool?”

Everything inside of Magnus was telling him to stop. To back away. To turn around and go back to the warm bed in his chambers. His every sense and part of his mind were screaming to stay away from the ledge. He wasn’t a coward. He was simply a man who calculated and assessed risk. And in his judgement, stepping out onto that ledge was unnecessary and completely foolish.

And yet, despite every warning bell in his head ringing, Magnus found himself moving toward the ledge then stepping out onto it. The stone ledge was twice the length of his foot, but it was against a sheer cliff face and when he looked down, he could see the waves crashing against the rocks below sounding like distant thunder. The air was thick with the smell of the sea.

“Ye’re doin’ fine,” Ciara said. “Come. Just a wee bit further.”

She was talking to him like a bairn, which irritated him, but he was too concerned about losing his footing to care too much. He moved slowly and deliberately, wondering why he was doing it with every step he took. This wasn’t like him. He didn’t take unnecessary risks. He didn’t do stupid things. And yet, there he was, stepping out onto an open ledge a hundred feet above the certain death that awaited down below.

“This is foolish,” he replied. “Ye’re goin’ tae get us both killed.”

“Maybe. But I’d rather die up here, doin’ somethin’ I love than locked in a drab, dreary chamber livin’ a life I dinnae want. That’d be a depressin’ way tae die.”

Ciara held out her hand and Magnus took it then pressed his back against the cliff face, the way she was standing. They stood side by side, looking toward the horizon.

“Ye’ve done this before?” he asked.

“Aye. ‘Tis the best way tae see what I wanted ye tae see.”

“And what’s that? Meself fallin’ and dyin’ on the rocks down there?”

She laughed and shook her head. “Nay. I wanted ye tae see that.”

She pointed toward the sea and Magnus turned to see the sun beginning to crest the distant horizon. The sky was immediately set aflame in hues of pink, orange, and red and the sun glittered off the surface of the ocean like liquid gold. He drew in a breath and watched as the fiery orb made its way skyward. He was so rapt by the beauty of the sunrise before him, Magnus stopped feeling the chill in the air.

“’Tis… stunnin’,” he said reverently.

“Aye. ‘Tis,” Ciara replied. “Dae ye see what ye miss when ye dae nothin’ but keep yer head down and follow orders all day, every day?”

“’Tis me duty.”

“I ken it is. But sometimes, ye need tae look around. Sometimes ye need tae see the beauty in the world around ye if fer nae other reason than tae remind yerself what it is yer doin’ yer duty and what yer fightin’ fer.”

Magnus gaped at her for a long moment in silence. It was such a simple statement and yet it was profound. It was a way he hadn’t considered seeing things before. He had always been so wrapped up in doing his duty that he hadn’t ever, like Ciara had just said, stopped to see what he was doing it all for. He shook his head and tried to find the words he wanted to express but found none. She gave him a gentle smile and squeezed his hand.

“Look,” she said.

Magnus turned and watched the riot of colors painting the sky above them. He fought to keep it from his face, but it was an emotional moment for him. His heart raced and his belly churned as he took in the most beautiful sunrise he’d ever seen. He had lived through plenty of sunrises, of course. But this was the first one he’d ever really seen. The first one he’d ever stopped to appreciate. And that was thanks to Ciara.

He snuck a glance at her again. She had a wild, untamed spirit about her that he found magnetic. Compelling. She was the opposite of him in every way, but he felt drawn to her and the chaotic energy she emanated. He loved that she could see the beauty in the most mundane things and seemed genuinely excited about things he found trivial. He saw the world about him differently through her eyes. It was both intimidating and exhilarating at the same time.

She made him feel things he didn’t recognize. Things he didn’t understand. But he liked the way she made him feel. Liked the way she made him see the world around him. It looked different than he’d ever seen it before. Simpler, perhaps. But more vivid. More vibrant. And infinitely more beautiful. Like her. Ciara captivated him in ways he couldn’t express. He didn’t have the words to explain just what he was feeling. But when she turned and their eyes met again, he saw understanding in her face and in how she gently squeezed his hand.

“What dae ye think?” she asked.

“’Tis the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” he replied.

Her cheeks flushed, but this time it wasn’t from the chill in the air. Their eyes lingered on each other for a moment before Magnus turned and gazed at the sun climbing into the sky. The world around them grew lighter as the day chased away the night. His heart soared and he couldn’t keep the smile from his lips as he enjoyed the beauty of a sunrise for the first time.

Being out on that ledge was foolish, there was no question, but it was also exhilarating. And he must have been infected by Ciara’s untamed spirit because for the first time in his life, Magnus felt truly free.