12. Ronan

CHAPTER 12

RONAN

G avin, Declan, and Leo’s match is today and I should be excited for how well these boys are playing. They’re only ten and eleven, but their hearts are in the game. I love their enthusiasm. If it were any other match, I’d be excited. Instead, I’m dreading the possibility that Leo will lose his first here. He’s also worked hard the past two weeks, and I won’t be able to help keeping an eye on his footwork.

Bridget and I set up everything for the match and I give the boys an encouraging chat before we take to the pitch. I can’t help periodically glancing over at Nora and Leo across the field. Lettie and Harris are with them and I wish I could be cheering on Declan and Leo, too. I haven’t seen Nora since I brought her to my place after the match and it’s been the longest forty-eight hours of my life. I took a walk last night by myself, since I’ve been so used to it with Leo and Nora, even Lettie.

The match begins and Leo’s moving the ball up the pitch. One of our defenders comes at him, but Leo pivots to the left, keeping the ball hostage. I silently cheer to myself whilst shouting to my boys to watch out for the mid-fielder who is headed their way. Leo’s cornered and kicks the ball away. He would’ve had the shot but I saw his confidence waver when pressured.

It’s no surprise that after the first half we’re tied 0-0. The boys are playing hard on both sides, and I’m so fucking proud of Leo. He narrowly missed the goal twice, and I hope he’s not feeling discouraged.

The second half is more of the same. With a minute left, Leo kicks the ball around one of our defenders, then cooks for a minute as he keeps it away from the other. With a fake to the left, he kicks right, our goalkeeper unable to snatch it in time. Cheers erupt on the other side of the pitch, and also to my left. Bridget is yelling, “Fair play to ya, Leo!” and I wish more than anything that I could properly congratulate him.

The game ends one-nil, and our team is still in good spirits despite the loss. As soon I pack everything up, I send a quick text to Nora.

Please congratulate Leo for me? He did amazing today.

I stuff it in my back pocket and my little night owl is shouting behind me, “You can tell him yourself!” I turn and find Nora, Lettie and Leo walking over, all with wide smiles.

Leo runs to me and I wrap him in a tight hug. “Did you see? I scored in my first match in Ireland!”

“Yeah you did! I’m so proud of you! My goalie didn’t even see it coming.” I look up at Nora. “What are you up to the rest of the day?”

Nora bites her lip and all I want to do is take it between my teeth and kiss the ever-loving hell out of her. “We were going to have a bite to eat and celebrate. Would you like to join us?”

“Can Gavin come?” Leo begs.

“Sure.” Nora looks around and when she spots Bridget, she yells, “Bridget! Want to come with us?”

“Where are you going?” she shouts back.

“Not sure. I can text you!”

We pile into a few cars and drive to a small restaurant down the street from my flat; my hope is that they’ll come by after. I’ve only been seeing Nora for a couple of weeks, but the need to have her close, breathe her in, hear her sweet hum when I pull her to me… It’s overwhelming.

At the restaurant, we’re seated at a rectangular table, the boys on one side, Nora next to me, and Bridget and Lettie on the ends. Nora sides her hand into my thigh, squeezing once, but not taking it back. I cover it with mind, the simple touch bringing me a sense of calm I haven’t felt these past few days. The boys are still in their kits, laughing and joking as if they hadn’t just played an hour of footie against each other.

Nora leans in to whisper, “What do you want to do after we eat?”

The truth tumbles out of me. “I need you home with me.”

“I don’t think I can get away for the day,” she sighs.

“Not just you. I spent two nights without you and Leo. That’s two too many, Nor. What if you stayed over? Leo loves hotels, it’ll be like staying in one. We can get takeaway and pretend it’s room service.”

Wheels are turning as she chews on her lip, finally replying, “Leo will be over the moon and never want to leave.”

I catch myself before saying, “Then don’t.” Clearing my throat, I opt for a toned down version. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like.”

“You don’t think this is moving too fast?” She glances over at Leo and Gavin who are still distracted. “I’m scared, Ronan.”

Moving my hand to her lower back, I lean in and whisper beside her ear, “When I’m not with you, you’re all I think about. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted, Nor. I’ll never let anything hurt you or Leo. If anyone is at risk of a broken heart, it’s me.”

Nora turns her cheek, the sides of our noses brushing. The world around us falls away, but as I’m about to kiss her, a flash of light catches my attention and I pull back. Glancing up, I breathe a sigh of relief that it’s a woman with her granny taking a photo together. My gut twists, wishing with everything in me that I could openly touch Nora, kiss her, take a damn photograph with her. I respect that she wants to maintain her credibility, but the network wouldn’t fire her for being with me.

Fuck it.

I take out my phone and get the boys attention for a quick picture. Gavin wraps his arm around Leo and the boys look like lifelong friends. I take one of Nora with Leo and Lettie, another with Bridget and Gavin, then click the button to reverse the camera to take one with my girl. Nora leans her temple against mine for one, then takes the phone from me and takes a second where she’s kissing my cheek.

They’re all just for me, but my heart swells at the thought that they could be my family one day.