Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

The buzzing in Cass’s head was getting louder, but she continued to troll through the files, trying to find one that was connected to her—sadly there didn’t seem to be one.

How could there be no record of what’d happened to her?

Then again, this was the government. She should know sometimes things were done off the books for the safety of those involved.

Is that what’d happened to her?

Had they been trying to keep her safe?

Well, she guessed they had because for over twenty years she’d been oblivious to her true parentage.

Cass closed down the window, tossed off her glasses, and rubbed her eyes. She was getting nowhere, and it was only frustrating her even more. She glanced at her phone. Would they tell her if she called them?

When was the last time she’d talked to her parents?

A decade ago.

The moment she’d hit her second year of college, they’d all but disappeared from her life. Their job was done. They’d given her a good foundation. She was at college. Living independently, she didn’t need them anymore.

That had been such a false idea.

Who didn’t need their parents?

Unless, of course, they were shitty parents, and the kids were better off without them in their lives. However, she hadn’t felt that way about hers, not until they’d basically shut the door on ever having a relationship with her.

They hadn’t had a close relationship. In fact, looking back, Cass could see that they hadn’t been loving at all, but at the time, she’d felt safe with them. They’d ensured she had everything she needed.

She rubbed her temples. The pain increased, and because her eyes were shut, she couldn’t stop the images from flashing across her mind.

A collage of her with the man she now knew was her real father. The face was recognizable now. She was sitting on his lap as he sat at a big desk. They were playing cards, and he was laughing. So was she.

Sadness mingled with happiness when she blinked, and the room came into focus again. Her computer screen had darkened, and she felt, rather than saw Irish’s presence.

“I had another memory,” she said, still facing away from him.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Cass shook her head then winced as her head still ached.

Warm hands landed on her shoulder and started to massage gently. Cass let her head drop forward, but she didn’t close her eyes, not wanting to tempt her mind into showing her more from her past.

“I don’t know if I want to keep having these memories,” she said after a moment.

“Seems like you can’t stop them. Your mind is determined to show you.”

“The timing could be better,” Cass said sardonically.

Irish’s lips warmed the base of her neck, and she sighed. “Perhaps now is the time. Your uncle could’ve found you. Somehow. Someway your mind knows this instinctively and is giving you the tools you need to process it all. ”

Cass scoffed at his fanciful thoughts. “That’s some woo-woo shit right there, Irish.”

“Maybe. But it feels like everything is building to a crescendo. You getting the file unlocked. Finding out who you really are. Your connection to the cartel that has been lurking around us for the last year.”

“Whatever it is, I wish it would stop,” she grumbled and shook free of his hold, even though she wanted to keep him close.

If her life was about to implode, she didn’t want Irish to be suffocated by the collapse.

“Come on, grumpy. Let’s go.” Irish tugged at her hand, and she had no option but to stand.

If she were being honest, she didn’t want to look at the computer screen anymore. Nor think about making a call when she had no idea how it would turn out.

“Where are we going?” she asked as he dragged her through the house.

“Out. Grab a coat.”

Irish’s bossiness wasn’t unusual. He’d pestered her on many occasions to leave the office when she hadn’t wanted to, but she always had because he’d been right. She had been there long enough and needed to eat and sleep.

He bundled her into his car, and she noted how he observed the area before he rounded the front of the car and got in beside her.

“Do I need to remind you about the security system I have? How if someone was on the property, I’d know about it?”

Irish glanced at her before turning his attention back to the road. “I do, but it’s impossible to have every angle of your property covered, no matter how many sensors or cameras you have up. There’s always a dead spot. Or a way someone can get in undetected.”

“Not at my place.” Cass didn’t care if she sounded arrogant. She’d carefully placed her security cameras to cover all angles of access. She’d even tested it herself. While the whole perimeter of her property wasn’t covered with motion sensors, she was confident no one would get close to her without her knowing.

Irish laughed. “You know what? I believe you.”

“You should. Now, where are you taking me?”

“It’s a surprise. Sit back, relax, and even have a nap if you want. I know your head’s still hurting.”

As much as she’d loved to rest her head back and let sleep overtake her, the fear of what she might dream about had her kyboshing that idea. “I’m good.”

Irish took her hand. “You don’t need to be afraid. I’m right here. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“You can’t stop my mind from working, can you? ”

“No, but maybe knowing I’m right beside you will help your subconscious know you’re safe.”

In all the time Cass had spent with Irish; she’d never pegged him as someone who believed in the woo-woo shit he’d spouted, first at her place and now in the car.

“Who are you, and what have you done with the Dylan O’Reilly I’ve known the last few years because that Dylan showed no interested in new age psychic shit.”

Irish laughed, and her lips twitched in response. He didn’t laugh often, but when he did, it was deep and hearty.

“I’m Irish, it’s in my DNA. You know I always search for the leprechaun at the end of a rainbow.”

It was sweet that he was teasing. “Maybe I can join you on a rainbow adventure. Or is that what we’re doing now?”

The sky was a cloudless blue, almost as light as Irish’s eyes, so that was definitely what they weren’t doing, but it was fun to be silly sometimes.

“Yep, I’m just going to conjure up some storm clouds and make a rainbow happen.”

Cass laughed, the tension across the back of her shoulders disappearing, along with the ache in her head. “I’d like to see that happen. ”

She settled down in her seat, her left hand firmly within Irish’s warm grip. Cass had no idea what had caused this change in Irish, but she would take it. She liked being this close to him. Joking and laughing with him. Making love with him.

If only she didn’t have the specter of her family hanging over her head. Then life would be amazing.

“We’re here.” Irish’s gentle voice woke her.

After not wanting to, the motion of the car had lulled Cass to sleep—a dreamless one which she was grateful for.

Shaking off the last vestiges of sleep, she looked around to see that they were at the beach. Malibu, if she were a betting woman—which she wasn’t.

When was the last time she’d been to the beach?

Too long ago, if she couldn’t remember. If she really thought about it, she’d visited Venice Beach a month after she moved to LA.

The sun glistened on the water as the waves rolled gently up and down the shore in a mesmerizing movement. A sense of peace settled over her even though she hadn’t even got out of the car.

“ Alastriona ? You good?” Irish’s fingers brushed across the top of her hand.

“Yeah, just soaking it all in. I was just remembering how long it’s been since I’ve been to a beach.”

“How long?”

She looked over to him and smiled. “It’s been a while. Thank you for bringing me.”

He smiled. “You’re welcome. How about we actually get out of the car and check the water out? I didn’t endure all the shit traffic on the Pacific Highway to sit in the car.”

She was glad she’d slept through the trip. She didn’t like traffic, and LA’s was one of the worst in the country. Her dislike of driving was one of the reasons she didn’t go far. Driving to and from work to the grocery store and the mall was pretty much all she could handle. If she had to go anywhere farther, which was very rare, she’d take an Uber.

She opened the door and looked at Irish. “What are we waiting for?”

He smiled again and got out.

Cass waited by her door for him to come around to her, and when he did, she held out her hand. Her heart skipped a beat when he took it .

Together they crossed the parking lot, and the second they hit the sand, they both stopped and took their shoes off.

The warm sand coated her feet, and she breathed deeply, filling her lungs with the salt-scented air. As the air whooshed out of her, she let the remaining tension still tightening her muscles release. Bubbles of excitement formed in her belly, and she all but yanked Irish down to the shoreline.

Cass would’ve dragged them into the water if Irish hadn’t pulled her back.

“What?” she asked.

“Give me thirty seconds to roll my pants up so they don’t get wet.”

“If the plan was to bring me to the beach, why did you wear cargos instead of shorts?”

Instead of answering, Irish winked and the lifted the flap just below his knee, exposing a zipper. In a flash he went from long pants to shorts.

“Nifty.”

“They definitely come in handy.” He opened one of the large pockets on the side and popped the fabric he just removed into it.

“And all put away neatly so they don’t get wet.”

“Yep, also leaves my hands free to do this.”

Cass yelped when he lifted her off her feet and carried her down to the water, lowering her so that her feet sank into the wet sand and the water lapped around her ankles.

She shivered at the shock of the cold water but the next time the liquid rushed up, she was used to it. Cass leaned against Irish and slipped an arm around his waist. They stood there for an endless moment, gazing out of the vast ocean.

“When you stand here, it hits you how alone you are. How large the world really is,” she murmured.

“You do. When I was deployed or on a mission and we were near the ocean, I also looked out over it. Sometimes wishing I was anywhere but where I was. Other times marveling that if I headed east or west, I’d eventually hit land. It’s humbling.”

Cass took the opening Irish handed her and hoped the door wouldn’t be slammed in her face. “Was it hard to say goodbye?”