Prologue

K arrington

Their eyes were locked in an intense stare down. Karrington had always been honest and transparent, but this situation felt different. When Luna Ray asked him if there was something he’d been hiding from her… something he needed to tell her… he wanted to lie and say no. The only reason he didn’t was because he knew if she was asking, she already knew. Instead of answering, Karrington looked at her with a clenched jaw.

His head hung as he released a shaky breath. Their two year anniversary was in three days. As much as Karrington wanted to propose, he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. Not until she knew and accepted the truth. And if that was what she was about to question him about, there was no doubt in his mind that she wouldn’t be accepting of who he truly was at all.

“Kare Bear,” she called softly before sniffling, and the sound caused him to squeeze his eyes shut. Karrington would have never done anything to intentionally hurt Luna Ray. He loved her. Unfortunately, Karrington’s actions may not have intentionally hurt her, but his secrecy about his family certainly would.

Licking the corner of his mouth, Karrington looked toward the left, unable to look into her leaking eyes.

“Karrington!” she whispered loudly, with force.

“You obviously know something, so say it.”

Luna Ray scoffed. “ You say it,” she commanded through gritted teeth. When he didn’t respond right away, she lunged from her seat and stepped into his personal space. Gripping his jaw, Luna Ray forced him to look into her eyes. “Tell me who you are.”

“I’m exactly who I’ve always been.” Karrington grabbed her wrist and tried to sit her on his lap, but she pulled away. “I’m your lover. The man you promised to spend the rest of your life with.”

Lifting her hands, Luna Ray’s mouth hung open as her head adamantly shook. “How can I spend the rest of my life with you? I don’t even know you.”

“What do you mean you don’t know me?”

“Tell me who you are.” Enunciating each word, she wrapped her arms around her in a self-hug. “Tell me who your family is.”

Karrington released a hard breath and ran his hands over his head. “My family… My father… He’s the boss of the Lowe Mafia.”

“And who does that make you?”

His head tilted as he licked the corner of his mouth and swallowed hard. Up until now, Karrington took great pride in his position. In that moment, he felt disgusted by it.

Jutting his chin out further, Karrington admitted, “I’m his enforcer, and soon, I’ll be his second in command.”

Even with Luna Ray knowing the truth, hearing his confession caused the words to weaken her body. It jerked back as she gasped and clutched her chest.

“But you thought there was a chance of us spending our lives together? I-I want babies and marriage. How did you plan on giving me either of those things? Y-You told me you were going to be an artist for God’s sake. What was the whole point of us going to college together? A cover up?”

“We can still have those things.” Karrington tried to assure her, but he knew it would be impossible. The only way they could was if he denounced his bloodline. Doing so wasn’t as simple as not speaking to his family anymore. He’d be a pariah, and so would anyone attached to him. He would have to leave Memphis, and if he came back, Karrington would be killed—worse, by someone in his family.

“How!” she shrieked, flailing her arms as he stood on weak legs. “Your wife was already chosen for you, Karrington, and it isn’t me.”

“Yeah, but that’s… I can leave. We can leave Memphis and—”

“No.” Chuckling, Luna Ray ran her fingers through her hair. “You can’t expect me to believe you’d choose me over your family. And even if you did, you would eventually resent me for it. You’re not going to be this… soulful artist who changes the world with his paintbrush. You’re a fucking mobster. You kill people.”

“Luna Ray—”

When he took a step toward her, she took a step back. Karrington lifted his hands in surrender. The last thing he wanted to do was scare her.

“My time in college was real. My degree is real. I did want to be an artist or teacher of art as a backup. The life I envisioned for us… I meant that.” He paused. “And maybe that was foolish of me, but I want you to know it was real for me.”

Blinking back steadily flowing tears, Luna Ray wiped her face. “I think it’s clear, but in case the words need to actually be said, we’re over.”

“Lu—”

“I can’t bring you around my family anymore. My father is a fucking cop, Karrington. There’s no way in hell I’d have a baby with you and risk their safety. And are you forgetting the fact that your wife has already been promised to you!”

“Who even told you that?”

“That’s not the point. The point is: There is a woman waiting to marry you after she finishes her master’s degree. Even if she wasn’t, I’m not going to be with a career criminal. We’re done.”

“I would choose you,” Karrington muttered, closing the space between them. “If you asked me to, I would choose you. And I’d keep you safe. I promise, Luna Ray.”

She allowed him to take her hands into his. “I shouldn’t have to ask you to choose me. Between me and your family, there shouldn’t be a choice.”

His thumbs caressed her hands. “I’m sorry. I just… Being with you made me feel normal. I wanted to have a normal life, a normal relationship with you. It was never my intention to withhold the truth from you. It just… happened. I kept telling myself I’d tell you who I am, and the right time never came.”

Luna Ray licked her lips as her head hung. “I want marriage and babies, Kare Bear. You’re saying you’d choose me, but would you really?” Her eyes lifted to his. “Knowing what that would cost you—us. Can you stand here and honestly tell me you’d choose me, be an art professor somewhere, and live a normal life?”

Their eyes remained locked, and Karrington didn’t realize how much time had passed until she chuckled softly and released his hands.

“Goodbye, Karrington,” she muttered, briskly heading toward the door, ignoring him calling her name.