26. Jack

26

JACK

It’s surreal being here. I haven’t gone out of my way for another man in forever. But damn, it’s nice to see Aaron and comforting to be in his presence. That’s the first thing I noticed after I arrived—how easy it always seems between us. Plus, when he opened that door, he took my breath away. He’s a beautiful man, and seeing him in his own space, even if it doesn’t fit him perfectly, is gratifying, if a bit overwhelming.

I might regret driving here, if only because my affection for Aaron will certainly grow, but I’ll think about that later. For now, I stepped out of my comfort zone, took a chance, and want to enjoy this night with him.

Once in his car, he drives me downtown, and I can see how different it is compared to Aqua Vista. More people, businesses, choices, anonymity… Just more.

I’m like a fish out of water, though there’s only a couple of hours’ distance between our towns. I look down at my jeans and shirt, feeling out of sorts, which is not like me.

“Stop it,” he says, reading me perfectly. “You look good. I might have to beat them off with a club.”

I laugh, some of my tension dissipating.

When he pulls in front of a parking meter near a plain-looking building, I’m surprised. I was expecting the restaurant to be fancy, but it’s down to earth, lived in, like something I might find on Main Street in Aqua Vista. And I wonder if the choice is purposeful. Maybe he doesn’t think I’d want something fancy. Okay, I’m thinking too hard about this. I need to just take a breath and be present.

We walk inside and are directed to a booth by a friendly host. It’s refreshing that she doesn’t know anything about us.

Once we order drinks and food, we catch up on our lives, things that couldn’t be summed up in texts.

“I’m so glad you and Beth have mended fences,” Aaron says, and I only feel a momentary sting before it settles into peace because I’m glad to have released that anger too. “If you were here longer, I’d have you meet my mom. I mean, if you wanted to. Not that I’m trying to have you meet my family. Sorry, forget I said that.”

Although it makes me panic briefly, I’m also honored he would consider it. But yeah, feels strange. “Well, you’ve met mine.”

“I’m pretty sure I had no choice.” He snickers. “You probably would’ve wanted to keep this on the down-low.”

“There’s nowhere to hide from my family in Aqua Vista. Plus, they love being in my business. Otherwise, it’s cool.” I lean toward him. “And I would…meet your mom.”

“Yeah?”

“Definitely,” I say, just as our food comes.

“She’s heard all about you and Aqua Vista, which is why I thought of it.”

“Uh-oh.” My gaze shoots toward the door. “You sure Rocco isn’t gonna show up and try to get me to sell?”

“Nah, I think he’s done with that.” He pops a fry in his mouth. “Besides, he’s got his own shit to worry about.”

I set my chicken wrap down and wipe my mouth. “What do you mean?”

“Just…he’s getting married soon and needs to focus on that.”

I nod, remembering that detail. “Well, good for him.”

“Yeah, I don’t expect him to bother you anymore.” He arches a brow. “Frank is another story now that Rocco knows someone as obsessed with cars as him.”

“Right? Frank’s already mentioned some car show around here. Apparently, they’ve also been texting.”

“I’m not surprised.”

After dinner, we walk around the square filled with shops and restaurants, which is no doubt only one of many in town. Aqua Vista’s nightlife pales in comparison.

Aaron pauses near a doorway where a bouncer is checking IDs. “This is a gay bar. Wanna have another drink?”

I’ll admit I haven’t been to many, and not in a long time. “Sounds good.”

As soon as we’re inside, a couple of men call out to Aaron, and it strikes me that this is his life. Friends, work, and bars in the city. Though I am surprised they just happen to be here. It must be a place they all frequent.

“How’s it going?” one of them asks.

“Good. This is my friend Jack. He’s visiting from Aqua Vista,” Aaron says, then introduces them to me.

Chase arches a perfectly sculpted brow. In fact, everything about him seems chiseled out of stone, from his cheekbones to his hairless thighs. “Not sure where that is.”

“About halfway between San Simeon and Big Sur,” I tell him.

“That’s how I came across the town,” Aaron adds. “Only gas station around for miles.”

Chase looks between us. “Ooooh, is this a love connection?”

“You dog,” Spencer says. “No wonder you haven’t been around lately.”

“No, I…I’ve been busy with work and stuff…” Aaron turns to me and mutters, “I’m sorry.”

I find myself disappointed in his response, but what was I expecting? A declaration of feelings? He likely thinks I wouldn’t want the scrutiny, and he’d be right. I certainly don’t.

But when it comes to Aaron, there have been plenty of leaps of faith.

Spencer motions to two empty chairs. “Join us.”

“Do you mind?” Aaron asks softly. “We can always?—”

“No, it’s okay.”

Aaron nods, and we take our seats at the table.

“So, how small a town are we talking?” Chase asks.

“Oh, I don’t know…” I shrug. “Aqua Vista is probably less than point five percent of San Jose’s population.”

Chase whistles.

The truth is, we’re not even considered much of a town. More like a village. Our mayor is also a full-time plumber, and most other government and emergency services are volunteer.

“But it’s a cool little coastal town,” Aaron says in my defense, which I don’t actually need. It’s not like I’m embarrassed of where I live. Hell, getting to the beach or hiking trails from San Jose is likely a car ride away.

“It suits me just fine.”

When the server is nowhere to be found, Aaron stands and asks what I want to drink before making his way to the busy bar. I almost want to escape with him, but I hold back. Instead, I people-watch and note the differences in patrons from bars I’ve frequented. For one, most seem younger than me. And given all the cropped shorts and shirts, I must’ve missed an important gay fashion trend memo.

Spencer taps my arms to get my attention. “You must feel overwhelmed.”

“What do you mean?”

“Plenty more men to choose from, no?”

I look around the room, and though there are several pairs of eyes glancing in our direction, I try and avoid eye contact.

“Have you had much opportunity?” Spencer asks.

The question grates on me, though he’s right. But it’s not like I live in the wilderness. I’ve frequented bars to hook up, but only when in the mood, which in the scheme of things hasn’t been a lot—something Johnny’s been teasing me about.

“I’ve had enough opportunity,” I tell Spencer, trying to be heard over the energetic song the DJ is playing. “But I’m not interested in anyone tonight.”

“Not even Aaron?” Chase pouts. “He’ll be disappointed because unless I’m imagining it, he cannot take his eyes off you.”

My face heats, and before I can respond that it’s mutual, Aaron returns with our drinks. We tap our glasses together and take a swig. It feels good going down.

The lights dim, and the music changes to a slower tempo.

“Wanna dance?” Aaron asks against my ear, and I feel a buzz of electric heat streak across my skin.

I want to say no because I’m not much of a dancer, but when will we ever have another chance?

Once I nod, he stands, and I follow him past swaying twosomes to a spot near the DJ booth. I grip his hand and place it over my shoulder as my fingers find his waist.

He likes that idea because his pupils dilate, and his other arm glides around my neck as he sinks into my embrace.

I press our cheeks together as I tighten my hold and take it all in. His scent, his soft breaths against my neck, and the way he feels in my arms.

When he brushes his lips against my ear, I shiver.

I groan, angling my head, and when our mouths meet, I’m lost in him. The bar melts away, and it’s just Aaron and me standing close, our hands in each other’s hair, our tongues meeting in a slow, sexy dance.

I hear a distinct, “Holy fuck, they’re hot together,” coming from his friends’ table, and I can picture Chase fanning himself.

I laugh against Aaron’s lips, and his eyes crinkle in a smile.

“Anytime you want to bolt, just say the word,” he says as I bury my face in his neck, smelling and tasting his skin. For all the anxiety over driving here and questioning if it was the right decision, right now, the timing is perfect, like it was meant to be.

“I appreciate that,” I reply, resting our foreheads together. “But this feels nice.”

“It does.” He draws back to look at me. “But I’ll admit I can’t wait to get you alone.”

“Tell me about it,” I reply, nipping at his shoulder. “This is your world, so you call the shots…”

His eyes widen. “Is that what you want?”

“Uh-huh.” I peck his lips. “I’m all yours for the night.”

“Well, damn, I like the sound of that.”

I sigh, my heart feeling like it might burst wide open because I don’t want to let him go, but I also don’t know how we can make this work. I’m thinking too far ahead again instead of just living in the moment.

When the song ends, we head back to the table.

Chase says, “I’m about to have my world rocked. Or at least my bed.” He motions with his cell, where I spy a hookup app. “So I guess this is goodbye?”

After he hugs Aaron, I say, “It was nice to meet you.”

He curves a brow. “Hopefully, we’ll see you again?”

“You never know,” I respond, avoiding Aaron’s gaze.

“Damn, Aaron, small-town men are refreshing,” Spencer says over my shoulder. “Not like the jackasses you’ve hooked up with lately.”

I automatically stiffen because hearing he was with anyone else bothers me more than I thought it would. A hell of a lot.

“Hey, you all right?” Aaron asks, placing his hand on my shoulder. “What Spencer means is that even in a large city, the LGBTQ scene can feel small?—”

“Really?” I clench my jaw. “Seems like you have plenty of options.”

“I do…” he sputters. “I have, but Spencer is dead wrong with his timing. I haven’t been with anyone since our first hookup at my motel in Aqua Vista. I swear to you I haven’t?—”

“Even if you had, it would be your right.” My gut churns. “We’re not…we never made any sort of agreement.”

“Maybe we never verbalized it, but if the tables were turned, I would be bummed and jealous. It’s just natural after all the things we’ve shared.” His gaze connects with mine.

“You’re right. I would be. I am . But with me so far away, it would be easy enough for you to?—”

“Is that what he did to you? Theo?” He grits his teeth. “Was he with other men while the two of you were together?”

“Apparently so.” My shoulders deflate. It feels like we have an audience, so I turn toward the door. “He finally admitted it after I asked him repeatedly to tell me the truth. I don’t like games.”

My legs start moving toward the exit, and Aaron follows me. “I’m definitely not trying to play games.”

“I just don’t know how to do this,” I admit once we’re outside. “Maybe showing up here only muddies the waters. No way this will end well.”

“How the hell do you know how it will end if you never give it a chance?” He throws up his hands. “I want you, Jack. I don’t know what that means for us, but I think about you all the time.”

“I think about you too. You’re on my mind all fucking day. I can’t do anything without thinking about sharing it with you.” My heart swells and aches as his eyes soften. “But that doesn’t mean the long-distance will work.”

“Maybe not.” He huffs out a breath. “Maybe you have me considering other options. Options other than San Jose.”

“Don’t do that.” I give him a pointed look. He knows Theo moved to Aqua Vista and couldn’t hack it. Not that Aaron is the same, but maybe the aspirations are. “Don’t change your life just because you think— That doesn’t always work out the way you expect it will.”

“Maybe this is about more than you and me. Maybe you have everything I never knew I wanted in Aqua Vista.”

“Like what?” We’re in front of a gift shop, and I step under the awning. “Look at where you live. In a thriving city, with a successful business.”

“I do, but…Aqua Vista has grown on me. And you—you’ve gotten under my skin. I miss being around you even when you’re grumpy.”

My mouth pulls into a smirk. “Gee, thanks.”

“You live in a picturesque town with an awesome family. You complain they’re always in your business, but you can see the undying love and support.” He shakes his head. “I wish I had that.”

“You have a mom who’s still alive,” I point out.

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—” He makes a frustrated sound. “I love my mom. But I don’t have siblings or extended family I’m close to.”

“Yeah, I get it.” I reach out and clutch his waist, unable to help wanting to be closer. “They encouraged me to come here. Not only because they adore you, but because they know how I feel about you.”

“And how is that?”

“I’m…” My pulse throbs. “You’ve gotten under my skin too. I wanted to see you again so badly. You might think they twisted my arm to make this trip, but they didn’t. I wanted to come, but I didn’t think?—”

My words are muffled by his mouth mashing against mine with a deep and bruising kiss that makes my stomach turn to mush.

He crushes his body against mine, enclosing me in all that warmth, and his commanding presence takes my breath away. I want more—more of him. I want to crawl beneath his skin and really feel him, truly connect.

I can feel his heartbeat galloping against mine, his cock stiff while mine aches, and I can’t get enough of his lips and tongue.

Someone walking past whistles, snapping us out of our frenzy, so we break apart, panting heavily into each other’s mouths.

“Let’s get out of here,” Aaron says hoarsely.

Hands clasped, we drive to his apartment, each lost in our heads. I feel the heaviness of the moment in my gut as fear takes hold that my longing for him will never be alleviated. That it’ll never be enough, or that he’ll never want me as much as I want him. He may have lofty ideas about other options , but reality rarely matches one’s expectations.

As soon as we’re behind closed doors, we kick out of our shoes and pull off each other’s clothes, leaving a trail of shirts and pants on the way to his room.

We stumble onto the bed, and Aaron drags me on top, his tongue in my ear, his teeth along my jaw, his fingers burrowing tightly in my hair.

“Want you to fuck me,” I murmur as my tongue licks into his mouth. “Need it.”

He stares hard into my eyes, as if making sure I’m serious, though I hinted as much at the bar. It’s not a request I’ve made very often, but tonight, I’m burning with the prospect.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. Wanna remember how you feel.”

“Fucking hell,” he groans, grabbing my ass and rutting against me. “I want to remember this, us , too.”

I bite back a moan of desperation as I flop to my back on the mattress, allowing him room to dig for a condom and lube. Beyond turned on, I flip to my hands and knees so I’m ready for him.

“Christ, look at you.” And hell, offering myself up to him like this feels vulnerable, but I’m so blinded by need I can’t find it in me to care.

He hurriedly slicks his fingers with lube, as if dying to feel as connected. His cock is stiff, the tip red, and as he pushes a finger inside me, it steals my breath, not only because it’s been a while.

“You okay?”

My knees tremble when he gently kisses my shoulder.

“I’m perfect.”

When his hand reaches around to fist my cock, I clutch at the sheets from the dual sensation of him pumping his finger in and out of my ass. I moan when he adds a second digit.

By the time I’m prepped, I’m begging for release. Given the satisfied grin pulling at his lips, he’s pleased that he’s making me lose my mind. Once he rolls on the condom, he presses his cock against my hole, applying light pressure, but it doesn’t quench the raw need inside me.

“Fuck me, Aaron.” I clench my teeth, pushing back against him.

His smirk transforms into a low groan as he pushes inside me in one fluid thrust.

“Ah, hell.” A tremor vibrates across my shoulders and down the center of my spine.

Aaron hisses, remaining motionless, as if trying not to break apart at the seams. When I glance back, his eyes are closed, and a warm flush stains his cheeks, neck, and chest.

“Need you to move.” I arch my back and rock against him, hoping to alleviate the burn.

He leans forward and cups my chin, dragging me into a sloppy kiss. “Does it sting?”

“A little.” I nip at his lips. “It’s what I want, though. What I asked for.”

His eyes soften. “Let me know if it’s too much.”

My chest feels light and fluttery, as if a stack of feathers is tumbling wildly against my rib cage. “Trust me. It won’t be.”

Aaron pumps his hips, his cock breaching my hole in shallow jabs. “You feel so fucking good.”

I mutter senselessly, the tip of my cock smearing precome against my abdomen.

“More.” Gripping my length, I jerk myself, appreciating the fullness of where our bodies are connected. “Need it. Need you .”

Readjusting his hands on my hips, he provides exactly what I want. Thrusting in a demanding pace, his balls slapping my ass, he solidly connects with that spot inside that makes my eyes roll back in my head. I wipe the sweat from my brow. The only sound in the room is our grunting as I cling to how good it feels before I bust apart at the seams.

“Fucking hell, Aaron. Do you even know…even realize…how much…I…” I’m panting, trying to make sense of my words, my back arching as he pounds me senseless. “How much I want you.”

“Goddamn it.” He slings an arm over my shoulder and pulls me up so my back is against his chest, his mouth at my ear. “I didn’t expect any of this. You don’t even know what you do to me.”

I tremble as he kisses my nape and reaches for my cock. It only takes a few strokes before my world breaks apart and I’m gasping, my hole milking his cock for all it’s worth.

“Holy fuck.” His rhythm falters, his muscles twitching violently as his orgasm hits him, pumping come into the condom.

Unable to hold it together any longer, I collapse to the bed, and Aaron falls on top, panting heavily into my neck. “So good. Fuck, so good.”

I feel his cock slip from my ass as I try to get my bearings and breathing under control. I feel him slink off the bed to toss out the condom, and then he’s back and rolling us to our sides, facing each other, and pulling the sheet up to our waists. He kisses my cheek, ear, and forehead, the gentleness overwhelming, yet I never want to leave the cocoon of his arms. I hum and pull him closer, fighting reality as it settles atop us, heavy and suffocating.

As if sensing the same thing, he cups my neck, and when our eyes connect, he takes my mouth—soft, deep, shuddery—our eyes remaining open, the emotion in his making me feel weak, faint.

When we finally draw apart, neither of us seems brave enough to speak. We take turns cleaning up in the bathroom, and then we’re back in bed with the lights out and curtains drawn, our limbs tangled together, as if hanging on to each other for dear life.

I sleep fitfully, waking throughout the night, peering at him through blurry eyes, his soft breaths fanning across my arm. I try to calm the panic in my chest that our time together is yet again coming to an end.

Too soon, I unravel myself from Aaron’s arms and get dressed to leave. We share coffee and breakfast before I get back on the road. He doesn’t ask me to stay longer, and I don’t offer. If I did, I’m not sure my heart could handle it. It’s already hard to break away from his potent kisses as he walks me out.

We don’t make any more promises to each other, but the things we said outside the bar and whispered in the dead of night linger between us. That’ll have to hold me as I get in my truck and head back to Aqua Vista. Still, I can’t help thinking that the road to heartache is always paved with hope and good intentions.