Chapter 23: Justin

CHAPTER 23

JUSTIN

Think of how much room there is for activities,” Emma said, putting her arms out.

“I do like corduroy.”

We were sprawled on a giant bean bag at the giant bean bag store on the third level.

I was so glad she was here.

We’d been to the aquarium, then had dinner at the Rainforest Cafe—Chelsea insisted we eat there once she saw the front of it on our way to Bubba Gump Shrimp. Afterward we stopped at a cookie shop and then went to the old-timey photo place. We did pirates and the fedoras.

I was using every excuse to touch Emma. My knee against hers under the table at dinner, holding her hand, a palm on her lower back as we walked into a store. And if I didn’t know better, I’d say Maddy was wingmanning me. She was attached to the stroller like it was her job to speed push it through the mall five feet in front of me and Emma, and I swear she was doing it to give me alone time with her friend. Right now she was taking Chelsea to the bathroom to wash chocolate off her face while Emma and I tried out different bean bags.

Emma lolled her head to look at me. “Where would you put this thing if you got it?”

“I could probably find a place. The house is a lot bigger than my studio.”

“So is your apartment gone?”

I looked back up at the ceiling. “I still have it for another three months. I couldn’t get out of the lease. But Mom paid the mortgage on the house through the summer so I’m not paying on two places.”

“Will you take me to see it?” she asked.

I looked back at her. “The apartment? Of course. It won’t have any furniture though.”

“I’m only coming for the Toilet King.”

I laughed and we lay there and gazed at each other.

I couldn’t help but think that this is what it would be like in bed with her. Talking and laughing, her hair fanned out under her like it was now.

She bit her lip. “I’m glad I came,” she said.

“Me too. I wanted to show you all Minnesota has to offer. You would have missed the hairpiece kiosk.”

We laughed but it was short-lived. My smile fell and I looked back at the ceiling.

“My life is pretty shitty right now, Emma,” I said. “I’m sure you could find much better dates.”

She gasped playfully. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“I’m serious.”

She sat up and propped her head in her hand, smiling. “I like the dates you take me on. I wanted to come today, and I’ve had a very good time.”

I searched her face for something deeper than what she probably meant, but before I could find it, she glanced at something over my shoulder. Alex and Sarah walked into the store. My sister stopped in front of our bean bag, looking disgusted.

“If you guys are done making out, can we go?” Sarah said, crossing her arms.

I sat up on my elbows. “Hey, how was the amusement park?”

They hadn’t met us for dinner. Besides a quick thirty seconds when they found me on the bench outside Sephora to get cash for the food court, I hadn’t seen them all day.

“It sucked,” Sarah said.

“No, it didn’t,” Alex said. “It was awesome!”

Sarah gave him a look. “Maybe for you. Hanging out with my brother isn’t my idea of a good time. I’ll be outside. I want to go.”

She left the store, and Alex threw his hands up in exasperation and went out after her.

I glanced at Emma and sighed.

“She’s right, you know,” Emma said, sitting up on her elbows too. “You should let her bring a friend next time.”

“Alex didn’t need a friend.”

“Alex is going to have fun no matter what and no matter who he’s with.”

I bobbed my head. “Okay. True.”

She nudged my knee with hers. “You don’t remember what it was like to be that age? It doesn’t matter how cool the thing is, if they don’t have a friend they won’t have fun. Trust me. It will save you a ton of grief, it’s a teenager hack.”

I guess she had a point. I mean, it wasn’t much different for me when I thought about it. I didn’t want to be at the mall—it had lost its novelty for me about fifteen years ago. I was only here for the kids. But with Emma here, I couldn’t think of any place I’d rather be. Even earlier when Maddy was in Sephora and Emma and I sat on the bench outside just talking, Chelsea knocked out in her stroller, it was fun.

It’s funny how when you find someone you like as much as I liked her, the destination is suddenly wherever they are. Even if there’s someplace better, you wouldn’t go if they couldn’t come.

I puffed air from my cheeks. “Maybe I should see if Josie can get dropped off at the water park tomorrow.”

“You should.”

I arched an eyebrow. “I don’t suppose you want to go to the water park tomorrow. I’ll buy your ticket. Maddy’s too,” I added quickly.

But she shook her head. “No. I promised Neil I’d put in some hostas.”

I nodded. “Right. Okay.” I tried to keep the disappointment out of my voice. “And where are you putting the rosebush?”

She tilted her head. “I don’t know. I have to find a good spot.”

“Let me know if you need help planting it.”

“I’ve got Maddy.”

“So you’re saying she’s good at digging holes…”

“I’m telling her you said that.”

“Please don’t, I’m scared of her.”

She laughed.

I peered out into the mall at my brother and sister loitering by the railing, Sarah looking annoyed and Alex texting, laughing at something on his phone.

“If you didn’t come today, it probably would have crushed what was left of my fragile spirit,” I said, only half kidding.

“Oh yeah? The stakes were that high?”

I looked over at her. “What would you say if I told you you should stay another few weeks? Sign another contract.”

She looked up to the side like she was thinking about it before coming back to me. “I would say that it’s probably not doable. It’s Maddy’s turn to pick,” she said. “I had to promise her she could pick twice just to get her to agree to come here.”

“What if you begged?”

She laughed like I was joking, but really I wasn’t.

She propped her head on her hand. “I think I know what you need,” she said.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” Then she leaned over and kissed my forehead.

I closed my eyes for the three seconds her lips were pressed to my skin. My heart was in my throat.

She pulled away slowly. “Better?” she whispered. “I hear forehead kisses are all the rage.”

“Ha.” I tickled her. She squealed and twisted away from me just as an employee approached us. “Hey, sorry guys, we’re closing up.”

I looked at my watch. Nine p.m. The whole mall was shutting down.

“We should probably go home anyway,” Emma said, sliding off the bean bag.

“Yeah,” I said, getting off too.

We walked out of the store as they lowered the gate behind us. Maddy was coming back from the bathrooms with Chelsea, a couple of stores down.

“How long are you staying at the water park?” Emma asked.

“Probably a few more days. Until Benny and Brad are done with the house. Can I walk you out to your car?” I asked, trying to buy a few more minutes with her.

She shook her head. “No, no. You have the kids. I’ll just say goodbye to you here.”

“Oh. Okay.”

She leaned over and gave me a hug. I breathed her in, tried to hold it in my lungs. I wouldn’t see her until our next date. Another five days at least and too long.

She let me go, and I held Chelsea while I watched Emma leave out the door by Nordstrom without looking back.

Emma had an aloofness to her. Like she was just along for the ride and the ride didn’t mean much.

At least not as much as it meant to me.