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60. Chapter Sixty

I'm not ready for this conversation.

Not even after last night, after what Enzo said. Not after he told me he loved me. Having the conversation was hard enough with Enzo, because it's more likely the baby is his. We've had sex so many times over the last month. Close to forty, if I had to guess. Rafael came in me exactly five times. I thought back on those times, long and hard, and I'm certain it was five.

So five versus forty.

I've never been a gambler and I don't like to take odds into consideration, but I'm not so stupid to think it's impossible this baby is Rafael's. Anything is possible, especially when it comes to nature and reproducing.

I don't know Rafael the way I know Enzo, and maybe that's my fault. I avoid him because I'm uncomfortable with this situation.

No, that's not true. I'm not uncomfortable with the situation, I'm uncomfortable with myself being in this situation. Not because I hate it, but because it's not traditional and that scares me.

When Rafael walks into the study, where Enzo and I are already waiting, I swear my heart leaps into my throat, and I can't breathe.

Enzo puts his hand on my thigh, and it gives me a fraction of comfort but doesn't relax me any.

Rafael sits down in the seat across from us.

"Thanks for coming," Enzo says.

"Sounded important," Rafael answers.

"It is," Enzo adds.

"You're canceling the contract altogether?" Rafael says flatly.

"No," Enzo and I both say, though Enzo is a lot calmer than me.

"Oh…" Rafael chuckles, scratching the back of his neck. "I was sure that's why you wanted me here."

"It's not," Enzo assures him. "In fact, it's the opposite." He looks at me, and back at Rafael. "We've redone the contract, even though I still think we shouldn't have one."

"Nice try," Rafael says as he takes the folder Enzo hands him.

Enzo and I spent the morning discussing a million scenarios regarding Rafael. We decided the best thing to do would be to go over the contract, fix it, offer it to him, but before he signs it, tell him what's going on and give him the opportunity to change his mind if he wants to. We don't want to tie him to this if he doesn't want to be part of it. Even if it's his, we want him to know he doesn't have to stay, and we won't hold it against him. Doing this with Enzo has given me the most relief I've felt in a long time, but having to tell Rafael he may be a father is more nerve-wracking than I thought it would be.

"I tabbed the areas with adjustments," Enzo says.

Rafael smirks. "Of course you did."

It's quiet while he goes through everything, looking over the spots that were altered.

Basically, the only thing that's different is I'm now included in everything. Enzo and I agreed we'd put in there that we could be alone with Rafael. We made the verbal agreement we wouldn't act on it until the other was comfortable. Both of us are okay without outlining specifics in the contract.

"Everything looks good to me," Rafael says, looking between Enzo and me. "Are you sure you're okay with this?"

Enzo nods. "We've taken plenty of time to talk about it."

"All right. Do you have a pen?"

"Before you sign it, there's something we need to talk about first," Enzo adds carefully.

"Okay…" Rafael says, closing the folder and placing it on his lap. He walked in here tense, a little empty. When he realized we weren't cutting him off, that instantly changed. He was his usual cheery self, but now? He's right back where he started.

"There's been an oversight," Enzo begins, leaning slightly forward and resting his elbows on his knees. He looks exceptionally sexy today in a white button up and dark grey slacks.

"An oversight?" Rafael questions. "In the contract?"

"Not exactly. It's entirely my fault as I hadn't considered this being a factor, but, well, it's here now and we will deal with it."

"Deal with what, exactly?" Rafael clasps his hands together, his green gaze darting from me to Enzo and back again. I wish I had more confidence to speak. This is partially my fault. I should have said something. I knew the whole time, but I wasn't thinking clearly. I was too caught up, and that's not fair. But that's exactly why we're offering him an out.

Enzo waits a beat before continuing. "No matter what you choose to do, we will respect your decision. I understand if this isn't what you want. In fact, I know it isn't, but what's done is done."

"You're freaking me out, Vincenzo. What is going on?" Rafael demands.

"I'm pregnant," I blurt out.

Yes, good job, Jordan. When you finally decide to speak, that's what you say?

Rafael's smile is slow-forming, and he huffs out a laugh. "Okay, and? Are you worried I'll be turned off by that? Because I won't be."

Enzo shakes his head, his eyes darkening. "No, Rafael. That's not our concern."

"Then what—" Rafael's brow furrows, his smile falling. "Wait. Are you trying to tell me—Are you saying you're pregnant with my child?" He presses a hand to his chest.

"We don't know," Enzo admits.

"Hold on," Rafael says harshly, leaning forward and steepling his hands. "Your wife is pregnant, and it's possibly mine? That's what you're trying to tell me?"

"We don't know," Enzo repeats. "We—I was careless, and I apologize, but as I said, whatever you choose to do or not to do is fine with us."

Rafael huffs out a disbelieving laugh and looks directly at me. "You're pregnant. And it could be mine? How the fuck did this happen?" He jolts up to stand, the folder falling onto the floor, the papers spilling out. Rafael gestures at me but speaks to Enzo. "The club ensured she was on birth control. Did she stop taking it to trap you in—"

"Rafael," Enzo snaps, also getting to his feet. "That is out of line."

I look at the floor, too ashamed to look at Rafael. I feel stupid. So stupid. And I can't blame him for thinking that. Any normal person would.

"No, Vincenzo. What's out of line is I may be stuck here forever," he bellows. "Even though the contract dictates I shouldn't be."

"If you don't want to be here, you don't have to be," Enzo says simply.

Rafael looks like he's about to punch Enzo. I don't know what I would do if there were to happen.

"And what? Forget I have a child running around on this earth? Leave it for you to raise?" He scoffs, gives Enzo a once-over, before barreling out of the room.

I expect Enzo to yell at him, or even nicely ask him to stop, but he doesn't.

"Epic fail," I mutter, leaning back in my chair. A wave of nausea runs over me.

"It could have been worse."

"He's right, Enzo. This isn't his fault, it's unfair for him."

"He's an adult and knew what he was doing. If he was so concerned, he should have asked. The club is one place, my house is another."

"It doesn't matter. He has every right to be mad."

"But he has no right to be rude." Enzo runs a hand through his hair. "I'll talk to him."

"Maybe he needs space."

Enzo turns to me. "I've known Rafael for years. Trust me, the last thing he wants is space." He heads for the door.

"Enzo?" He looks over his shoulder. "If you need to—If he needs…" I sigh. "I won't be mad."

Enzo nods. "Thank you, angel, but it won't be necessary."

He leaves the room, turning down the hall the way Rafael went. I both love and hate how much Enzo knows Rafael. Yet I don't know a single thing, and we could be having a child together. Which is not how I wanted my life to go.

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