Chapter Three

∞∞∞

Ruby:

The following Tuesday I’m there early for my training. Excitement pulses through my body as I wait to see him. I want to see his reaction. I’ve spent the last five days just thinking about that kiss. About how sweet and gentle he was. But he’s so strong. It’s a contradiction but it’s one that I want to study, take apart and put back together. Like I feel like he’s doing with my spirit. I’ve woken up every day with a little smile and a spring in my step.

It’s weird how much a simple thing like someone defending me could release some of that cold grip that my fears had on my heart. I hate it but I wish he had been there when I met Preston. I think I wouldn’t have gotten in the situation I had. But that’s not fair to put that onto someone else.

I sigh. I’ve made some bad mistakes and some people can get away unscathed. I did not. But like a flower in sunlight, I can feel myself opening back up to feelings that I thought had been permanently deleted from my body. Need and desire and caring. All of it.

Jaxon comes through the door and smiles when he sees me, startled. He strides up to me and gestures at my outfit. “Early huh? And look at you! You look…really nice.”

I blush and hang my head. He reaches his hand out and cups my chin gently. “Don’t turn your eyes down, Ruby. Don’t ever let someone make you feel like you need to hide. You’re a beautiful woman and you should keep your head up, be proud of that fact. And the fact that you’re smart, successful and gentle and…well, I could go on forever.” He gives me a devilish grin. “But I’ll stop because you’re blushing again.”

He steps around me and leans down to whisper in my ear. I shudder when I feel his warm breath caress my skin. “And you look fucking cute as hell when you blush, darlin’.”

I glance up at him from under my lashes and catch a look of pride on his face. I don’t know whether he’s proud of me or he’s proud that he made me blush but I like it. It feels like he understands me.

“What made you pick pink today?” He waves at my clothes.

I follow him through the gym, making sure to stay on his heels. I feel safe by him. Like no one else is watching me. Like we’re alone here.

“My favorite color is pink.”

He turns and starts setting up the leg machine that we worked on the other day. He cleans it and then checks the weights before patting the seat for me to “mount up” as he calls it. “Really? I’ve never seen you wear pink before this. Only dark colors.” His ice-blue eyes drift down my body and I can feel my pulse speed up. I know I’m just as covered as I usually am, it just feels like I’m not as invisible as I was.

But I don’t mind him seeing me. I actually crave it. I want him to see me but at the same time I’m scared of him seeing too much. Not just emotionally but physically as well. The attack left some permanent marks that made it even harder to move beyond what he did.

I trust Jaxon but that doesn’t mean I’m not scared of how he’ll react when he sees the scars.

“Alright, Ruby. We’re gonna push even a little further today. I want you to let me know if anything feels uncomfortable and we’ll stop immediately. We’ll figure out if there’s a problem but I need you to stop and tell me where it hurts.” He moves in closer to me and I can smell his unique scent. It’s a spicy, musky scent. From now until the end of time, I think I’ll picture him every time I smell that scent.

His hands reach out and touch the top of my thigh while he checks to make sure I’m set up right. He steps back and smiles gently. “Now, let’s hit it. Put everything into it and I’ll give you a reward after we’re done.” His smile is sly. I have no idea what he’s planning but for the first time in a long time I’m excited at the thought of a surprise.

I high-five him. “You got it!”

After five minutes on that machine we move on to the next one, the triceps extension one. Then we hit the slanted bench to do crunches. By the time we’re done I’m exhausted but I feel proud of myself for sticking it out. And I’m dying to find out what his surprise is.

I wash up and change into street clothes, not wasting my time since he’s waiting on me. I practically skip out to see him. My heart stutters for a beat or two when I see him standing there looking so handsome and tall and strong. His shoulders are rounded and muscular, his every bicep, tricep and pectoral muscle defined like a greek god. Seeing him there makes my mouth go dry.

My street clothes are still loose and baggy and cover every inch of me but they’re feminine. The sweater is just big enough to skim over my generous curves and it’s a soft shade of green that makes me feel pretty. The way his eyes light up when he sees me makes me feel like it was worth it to step outside of my comfort zone the other day and go shopping with my agent. She was thrilled to help me pick out some nicer clothes. She even managed to talk me into a fitted green silk dress that covered every inch of my upper body but slithered along my curves and hit about mid-thigh. I couldn’t wait to wear it for Jaxon one day. And I knew it was going to happen.

I’m no longer terrified to have the showing. But I want Jaxon to come with me.

“So what’s my surprise?” I ask breathlessly. He grins and hands me a bag. I look inside it and see a beautiful emerald green tank top and capri shorts.

“I thought maybe you’d like to wear this the next time we work out. I think you’d look amazing in it. As soon as I saw it on the shelf I thought of your eyes.”

∞∞∞

Jaxon:

“Don’t you like it?” I ask her, stomach tightening. She doesn’t look happy or excited. She looks like she’s going to be sick. I wasn’t sure if I should give it to her today but when I saw her pretty pink outfit I felt like she’d appreciate it.

“Is there something wrong, Ruby? Do you not like it? I can return it and get you something else it’s just that the color reminded me of you so much.” Her eyes are unfocused and I swear I see a glimmer of tears in the corner of her eyes.

“It’s really pretty,” she whispers but it sounds like she’s forced it out of her mouth. She’s looking at it like I look at snakes and spiders. Terrified and slightly sick. She’s also pulled back into herself. Her narrow shoulders are hunched and her back is bent.

“Talk to me, Ruby. Tell me what’s wrong. I just want to know so that I can help you.” My hand slides around her shoulder carefully and I move in closer until I can smell that soft scent she wears. She shivers slightly but doesn’t move away and I count that as a win.

Her eyes stay down and she sighs. “I wanted to wait for awhile to talk to you about some things but I suppose you should know what you’re getting into if you want to date me?”

The question at the end is a no-brainer. I’m not just gonna date her. This is the girl I’m gonna marry and take home to mama.

“Let’s go somewhere to have a coffee and you can tell me whatever’s weighing on that pretty head of yours.”

She nods and takes my hand when I hold it out. I lead her out the door and take her to a coffee shop that’s only a few doors down. I come here a lot so the girl behind the counter smiles at me when she sees me but it seems like the smile dims a bit when she sees Ruby. I’ve never gone out with her so I’m not sure why she’s so aggravated. I can see it in her eyes though. She’s pissed.

I groan to myself. Women. I’ve never led her on, but I have a feeling she’s gonna make things uncomfortable.

We move to the counter and the girl asks abruptly what we want. Ruby looks up at me quizzically. I know she can hear the bite in the girl’s words.

“We’d like two hot cocoas with whipped cream and sprinkles please.” I know it’s not good to order for a lady but this just feels like one of those times when you should keep it simple and get the hell out of there.

We wait against a far counter with her leaning into me and my heart thrills at that small sign of trust. Whatever’s going on it has nothing to do with her growing feelings for me.

We get our drinks and slip over to a table in the corner with no one near it for some privacy. “Now, tell me what’s going on, Ruby. I think we’re starting to get closer but it feels like today when I gave you those clothes, we moved a bunch of steps back. I think you know how I feel about you and that I’m willing to wait however long it takes. I just feel like you’re upset about something I did and I’d like to know what that is.”

She sighs and stares down at the table, shoulders hunched. “I think you have a feeling about some of it but the truth is, I was attacked when I was a freshman in college. It was bad.”

I know there’s more to it than that. “How bad was it, darlin’?” I ask her softly. I reach a hand out and lay it over her hand. She settles and her head comes up like I give her strength. She’s plenty strong but I hope I do make her feel like the warrior she is.

Her emerald eyes look up into mine but I don’t think she’s really seeing me. I think she’s seeing whatever happened and I clench the fist that’s not holding her hand.

“I was walking home from the library one night. I got caught up in a crowd moving towards a frat house where there was a party. This gorgeous boy came up to me and asked me if I wanted to come in. I was so flattered that he was interested in me that I walked in that door. About an hour later I had a drink and felt like the room was spinning. He laughed and said he’d walk me home.” She gulps and I know the next part is the part that’s going to make me want to kill somebody. I know ways to kill somebody to make sure nobody finds them. I might need to look this guy up and practice. The gorgeous boy. Just the thought makes my teeth clench until I hear a crack.

She shudders and her eyes close. “ He got me in his car and drove me to some spot in the woods. He raped me and then he tried to kill me. With a knife.”

The stark words fall out of her pink pouty lips and I swear I feel the room fade out for a second. I’ve never felt anger like I feel right now. The writhing, twisted need to kill somebody in the most painful way possible. “What’s his name?” I grind out between clenched teeth.

She shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. It turns out I was one of several victims. That gorgeous boy was a serial killer. A dark monster hiding on the campus preying on naive girls like me.”

“It does matter. He should pay.”

“He did. I lived and identified him. He had killed three other girls. I was just lucky enough to survive. I just never felt lucky before I met you.”

Her gentle eyes meet mine and I can’t believe the desire flaring in them. How can she ever want another man after that? So I ask her.

“How can you ever want another man after that?”

That little mona lisa smile curves her full lips again. “I didn’t think I every really would. Then I met you. I’ve never wanted any other man but you, Jaxon. Every time I’m near you I feel out of control.”

I snort. Yeah, I know that feeling. But I still have one more question. “Why didn’t you like the outfit I picked for you?”

Her head sinks down. “I’m ashamed of how I look.”

My eyes widen and I huff out a breath. “Why the hell would you be ashamed of what you look like? You’re a stunning woman. You take my breath away every time you walk into a room. Like Joan of Arc. You’re a warrior, a survivor. That’s sexy as hell, darlin’.”

Her eyes look up into mine and the soul-deep fear in them stirs my protective instincts. “I have scars, Jaxon. A lot of them. He hurt me so much. They said it was amazing that I lived.”

I lean back in my seat again, nausea and anger roiling in me like the boiling sea during a storm. Power and fury unleashed but I have nowhere to let it go. He’s already in jail.

“He’s not getting out is he?” I almost hope she says yes so I can find him. I feel like she knows what I’m thinking. She shakes her head.

“No, Jaxon. He’s in there for over a hundred years. No parole. Three counts of murder and an attempted murder will do that for you.”

I touch her hand. “Ruby, I don’t care what you look like. I love you. I love that wild warrior heart of yours and the gentle soul that you still have even though you’ve gone through something that could drive a weaker person to hide forever.”

She grimaces. “I did do that for a long time.”

“But you found your way out of that place.”

“For you. Because of you.” When she says that, my heart soars into my throat. The thought that this beautiful creature thinks I saved her…well, I feel ten feet tall. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes are sparkling like the finest gemstones.

I shake my head though. “You would have pulled yourself out eventually.”

“That was a very dark place and I was lost. Until I saw your light and realized there are really good men out there.” She squares her shoulders and sets her cup down, picking up her purse.

“Come home with me, Jaxon.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to rush you.”

She looks at me and smiles a soft smile that radiates joy and hope. “You never would.”

“I’ll go but we don’t need to do a damn thing. I’m just happy to spend more time with you.”

Her eyes glisten with tears and I swear to god, my own eyes prickle. “I know. And that’s why I trust you. You’re the best man I’ve ever met.”

“I’m just a man, darlin’. A man in love with the most beautiful angel on this planet.” I mean it too. She’s more woman than I deserve but fuck if anyone’s taking her away from me. She’s mine.

She nods, lips tilting. “I’m yours, Jaxon. Forever if you want me.”

I throw a tip on the table although really the service was terrible but nothing’s going to hurt my mood right now. I’ve never been so happy.

I grasp her hand and hustle her out the door. “Forever it is then, darlin’.”