Chapter 29

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Sometimes in life, you must do things that hurt you, and sitting across from my ex-boyfriend while I ignored a perfectly good dinner would hurt me.

No pain, no gain.

Twirling around I checked myself out in the mirror. I looked good. I looked better than good. I looked fucking fantastic. The white, long-sleeved bodycon dress looked amazing against my skin. It was like a second skin and made my ass look fabulous. The tan wedges were cute and not too painful on my feet. I thought about taking the truck, but I was sure I’d end up with dirt smudges. Besides, Grandpa wanted to visit Rusty’s pop, so Rusty was dropping me off, that way Grandpa got to keep the car.

“You look nice. This have anything to do with the outsider who’s staying at Lee’s bed-and-breakfast?” See, in small towns, nothing was a secret for long. The weather was gloomy. I hoped it didn’t rain. It would mess with my outfit.

“It’s not what you think,” I said as I got in the truck.

“Not your fancy boyfriend coming to get you back?”

“It’s more complicated than that.” Rusty didn’t tell me about his wedding. I didn’t have to tell him about Ashton.

Sue me, I might never get over him getting married without me.

Franny’s was just like I remembered it, old and outdated but it smelled divine. They still covered the tables in burgundy and cream cloths with a candle in the center. It was charming. Max used to bring me there all the time. We also sat in the last booth away from everybody else. I had to fight the urge to look at our spot.

It wasn’t our anything anymore.

As soon as Ashton saw me, he got up. “You look beautiful, Freya. I hope you don’t mind, but I went ahead andordered for us.”

He grabbed my chair and pulled it back so thatI could take a seat. Ashton was a gentleman, just not where it counted. Real gentleman didn’t cheat. Guess no one told him that .

“Can we please stop with the bullshit, Ashton? I’m tired, I left, and I burned all the things you gave me. What do you want from me? Haven’t you humiliated me enough? Can we call it even and be done?”

Ashton took a sip of his water before he answered me. “I’m sorry, gorgeous.”

I used to think I was special when Ashton called me gorgeous. It made me feel something more than the emptiness I carried with me. Except right now it irritated me.

“You’re sorry or sorry you got caught? Because it didn’t seem like you were sorry when Vivian was bent over our couch screaming for you to fuck her harder,” I spat. The rage I felt that day was coming back.

“I made a mistake, Freya.” He reached across the table to take my hand. “I love you, gorgeous.“

When you had abandonment issues, feeling desired felt good. It made you forget for a second the hurt you felt when someone left, but eventually that soothing feeling faded and the empty ache was still there.

“When you love someone, you don’t cheat on them. There isn’t room for anyone else in the relationship because your heart is already full. When you love someone, you don’t hurt them, because hurting them hurts you. Every decision you make is with the other person in mind. You’d do everything for their dreams to come true, even if it means sacrificing your own.” My tone was soft but firm, getting my point across. Ashton was quiet, and that was when I felt the heat at my back. Stupidly, I turned, my eyes automatically going to the table in the corner.

They say time heals all wounds, but in my case, I felt like time just ripped them open again. I blinked twice, trying to tell myself that I was losing it. There was no way Max was sitting with Abigail in our spot.When our eyes locked, it felt like we were the only two people in the room.

Nothing mattered except the two of us.

Except that wasn’t true, not anymore.

All those feeling we had for each other, he now had for someone else, and it wasn’t his fault, and it wasn’t her fault. Hell, it wasn’t even my fault. When you loved someone, you’d do anything for them, and I had. So, I looked at Max one more time, and I promised myself I would let him go.

“It’s hard to love someone who doesn’t want to be loved. You can’t say it was all bad, Freya. At first, it was wonderful. The more time passed, the more withdrawn you got. You never talked about your family, about your home. You were there with me, but you weren’t.”

“So, you had sex with someone else? It’s not like I wasn’t giving it to you,” I replied harshly.

“It wasn’t even about the sex. It was about the connection; you didn’t give me that. Tell me how many times I came home stressed out of my mind and you bothered to ask me why?”

He was right,I never gave him a piece of me, a part of my soul. How could I when I never got it back?

“That’s not the point, Ash. You slept not only with one woman, but many. I could never forgive that.” The waiter brought our food, causing both of us to be quiet. I knew I would not be sticking around for much longer.

“Come back, gorgeous. We can start over. I know we both had our faults, but we can still salvage what we had. You were good for me. Everyone loved you. ”

That automatically had alarm bells going off in my head. Motherfucker . It had never been about me; it was still about him. I threw the napkin down, ready to bolt.

“Un-fucking-believable, it’s all about the investors, isn’t it?”

“I want you back, Freya, and I believe we can start over again.”

“Answer me?” I demanded.

“When you didn’t show last time, they asked questions. You didn’t exactly make it a secret why you left. You and I were part of an image, gorgeous. When you left, it didn't look good for the company.”

“But me having to get tested for STDs, that looks good for the company?” I grabbed my purse and got up, ready to leave, but Ashton took out a white envelope from his jacket.

“I was hoping I wouldn’t have to do this.” He sounded remorseful. He laid two pictures of me on the table. I didn’t need to see more. I remember that day perfectly. After I found Ashton cheating, I left, but not before I took a crowbar to both of his cars.

So fucking stupid.

I blame Beyoncé and Carrie Underwood for glamorizing car vandalism.

“You come to the dinner, pretend we’re still together, and I don’t go to the cops.”

I was debating how much trouble would I get in with the cops. I had no money, even though Max and Abigail had yet to cash the check I gave them, but I couldn’t count on it. I’d rather owe Ash than Max, so that made things easy .

“Fine, only for the gala. After that, you can tell them I cheated on you for all I care, and I’m staying at the Ritz. On you.”

“Done.” He gave me a triumphant smile.

On the bright side, I killed two birds with one stone this way. I got to deal with Ashton, and I was going back to San Francisco.

“Oh, and, Ashton, after this, forget you ever fucking knew me.” I got up, not wanting to spend another minute with him. I had had enough. Before Ashton could reply, I heard Abigail’s voice.

“Trouble in paradise? I couldn’t help and notice you two seemed a little tense. Wanted to make sure you were okay, Freya?”

My shoulder burned from where Abigail was touching me. Someone tell this bitch to remove her hand before I slap her. Max wasn’t far off; he was right behind his fiancée. When I cast my eyes his way, he was glaring at Ashton. What the fuck was he mad for?

“Everything is perfect now, isn’t, gorgeous?” Ashton used the opportunity to wrap his hand around my waist. I fought the urge to deck him in the face.

“Yes,” I gritted. I didn’t want Ash to tell Max or Abigail why he was here. It would humiliate me if they knew the truth. So, I let Ashton hold me. Picture fucking perfect couple.

Sticks and stones, right?

“Hello, I’m Abigail, and this is my fiancé, Maximilian.” She extended her hand to shake Ashton’s. I tried not to gag when he kissed her hand. Wasn’t that what he did with me, and I found it swoon-worthy?

“Abigail, Max, can I call you, Max?” Ashton’s hold on me became tighter as he shook Max’s hand.

“So, what is it you do?” Abbi asked as she leaned into Max. My heart felt a little stab of pain when he put a hand across her waist. When I looked up, he was staring at me.

What happened to us? I looked at him and wondered.

You left, I could have sworn he answered.

“I’m CEO of Hill’s Real Estate.” Abigail’s eyebrows rose with interest. It wasn’t shocking, I had the same reaction. Ashton’s family’s business was everywhere.

Then she turned and said, “Freya Pratt, you always knew how to go big.”

“Can we go now?” I turned to Ashton, knowing full well how rude I sounded, but it was either we left or I exploded. I was a ticking time bomb.

“Stay, please join us for a drink. I’d love to hear all about how you two met. Don’t take this the wrong way, but none of us thought Freya would amount to anything. Isn’t that right, honey?” Abigail sneered, her smile sweet like poison. Resting my head on Ashton’s shoulders, I smiled back at her. Bitch.

“I’ll be right back,” I told them. I went toward the restrooms; the emergency exit was right next to them.

“You weren’t going to bother with a quick hello, my beautiful girl?” Frank stepped out of the kitchen, bringing a smile to my face. He was just like I remembered him, a little rounded, kind eyes, and dimples .

“Hey, Frank.” I hugged him. “Mind if I slip out?”

“You know I’ll always have your back, girl, but I gotta say, what you did to that boy, that wasn’t cool.” I looked down because I couldn’t meet his eyes.

I made mistakes, and I was living with them.

When I opened the door, I cursed the light rain that was already drizzling. If my options were getting wet and increasing my chances of getting pneumonia or going back and having a drink with Ashton and Abigail, then pneumonia sounded fineto me.

My white dress was wet and clinging to my body,my hair was soaked, but somehow in the rain, I felt better than I ever had. It was like it was washing away everything I was, everything I’d been. My dream had ended, and it was time to accept that sometimes we all didn’t get new dreams, and that was okay. Sometimes, things just ended, and you made peace with them.Sometimes starting anew wasn’t in the cards for you, and that was okay too. Because for a brief second, I tasted it, the dream, it was big, and no one could take that away from me.

So, Abigail had him, but for a moment, so did I, and all those memories we made together she could never have. Even if it was painful to think about, for a moment in time, everything was perfect, and it had been mine.

Only mine.