29. Lexi

29

LEXI

Easton walked back into the room just after Noah had finished removing the frosting from my lips. What was coming over us? We were not being careful. Was the fact that we were no longer fake-dating somehow making it possible for us to finally be more open with our feelings?

Whatever it was, I didn't know if I could handle being alone with Noah anymore. He was so good-looking. So amazing. And I kind of wanted to throw myself at his feet like all the other girls I'd made fun of in the past. This was ridiculous.

"You ready?" Easton asked from where he was standing about three steps down.

"Sure," Noah said. "I'll be right down."

When Noah left and I was alone in the kitchen, I somehow pulled myself together again. I put the last batch of cupcakes in the oven and let the others cool on the counter. Then I stored the frosting in the fridge.

I looked around at the messy kitchen. I could clean it all up right now...or I could go downstairs. The cupcakes still had twenty-two minutes left. I tapped my fingers on the counter, internally debating with myself. I wanted to be with Noah. But would it look too obvious if I went downstairs?

But there was an even better question than that. Should I care if it looked obvious anymore? I had liked Noah for six stinking years, and in those years, I’d never really done anything about it. And where had that gotten me? Nowhere. I had simply wanted something and always wondered if I was going to ever have a chance at it.

I shook my head. This had to stop. I needed to listen to Juliette for once. Seize the day. And if I came out of this looking like a huge fool, at least I'd know that I tried instead of always wondering what if .

I’d always put Noah on a pedestal because he was older than me and more popular. But I needed to stop that too. I was a great catch. I might not be the same as all the girls he’d dated in the past, but I had my own set of qualities going for me. I was smart and spunky. And I may not look exactly like a supermodel, but I wasn’t ugly either. I had caught Noah checking me out enough times this week to know that he was attracted to me .

I needed to stop making excuses to push my feelings for him away.

So I folded up my apron, stuck it in the drawer, and went downstairs. Easton was sitting in a gaming chair in the middle of the floor while Noah was sprawled out on the couch, watching him play.

When Noah saw me, he quickly sat up. "You joining us?" he asked. And I couldn't help but detect a slight hint of hopefulness in his tone.

I shrugged, hoping to come off as nonchalant. "I'm just waiting for the cupcakes. Figured I'd come and see what all the hullabaloo is about this game of yours."

Noah moved to the end of the sectional and patted the spot beside him quietly.

I hesitated for just a moment before taking the seat beside him.

We sat in silence as Easton played the video game. And I was all too aware of Noah. He was only inches away. I watched his chest rise and fall with his steady breathing. He seemed as calm as could be while I felt like I had hundreds of bouncy balls flying around in my chest.

He sighed loudly, and I peeked at him through the corner of my eye. And it was then that I noticed his hand resting on his knee. It was just sitting there, like he was waiting for me to grab it.

I'd held his hand so many times this week, but if it happened again, it would be different. This time it would actually mean something.

So I set my hand on my leg, hoping he'd see the signal and take it easy on my heart. My pulse started racing when his hand slowly slid off his leg and onto the space between us. I held my breath. If he held my hand now, it was over. I'd be his.

It took all my courage to let my hand slide off my leg to the space next to his. And in just a couple of seconds, my whole world tilted on its side because Noah Taylor ran his pinky slowly along mine. It felt amazing. Then, he gently took my hand in his.

I couldn't keep the huge smile from creeping up my lips. Noah Taylor was holding my hand. And for the first time, it was real.

He shifted in his seat until our arms were pressed against each other. Warmth radiated from everywhere we touched, and that blissful feeling that I was having more frequently around Noah swept over me.

"Regis is supposed to be hidden in that cavern," Easton said, breaking me out of my foggy daze. "Do you want a turn?" His thumbs were still going crazy all over the buttons, so he didn't take the time to look back at us—which I was thankful for.

Noah cleared his throat. "No, I'm good."

Then in a quieter voice that only I could hear, he said, "Real good. "

We watched Easton play for a little longer, and I let myself settle more firmly against his side, loving being so close to him—and actually being awake this time. Before long, Noah placed my hand onto his leg so he could draw slow circles along the back. My nerve endings shot to life. I just loved the way he was touching me. It was so gentle, and slow, and it made me feel cherished.

"I like that," I whispered, daring to look at him again.

His big brown eyes were soft when I met his gaze, and he lifted my hand slowly to his lips, gently kissing the back of my hand. "I like this too." His voice was even more gravelly than usual.

I almost swooned—finally understood why all those girls in the old-fashioned movies fainted around men. It was a real possibility for me if Noah kept treating me like I was some sort of treasure.

Then, as if that wasn't enough, he leaned closer and kissed me on the forehead and then on the cheek. My heart beat like crazy when he let his head rest against mine. We were being so dangerous right now. My brother was just sitting right there in front of us. But for the life of me, I couldn't pull myself away. I was officially addicted to Noah.

We just sat there for the next few minutes—so close, but ready to pull apart the instant Easton looked back. Too soon the timer went off on my phone, signaling that I needed to take the cupcakes out of the oven .

I groaned, and the sound seemed to bring Easton out of his gaming trance.

"What's that for?" he asked.

I sat up straighter, pulling myself away from Noah just before he could see us. It took a moment for me to find my voice. "It's the timer for the cupcakes. They're done."

I didn't want to get up. Not when the last twenty minutes had been so perfect. But I forced myself to stand, and when I did, I immediately felt cold without Noah right beside me.

"Do you want any help?" Noah asked when I was at the base of the staircase.

I darted my gaze to Easton. He was back in his game, so I said, "That would be nice." And then I turned around and headed up the stairs, listening to the sound of Noah coming up right behind me.

I pulled the cupcakes out of the oven and set them on the stove to cool.

"Did you want to help me frost these ones?" I gestured to the cupcakes that had already cooled.

He leaned against the counter with a half-smile on his lips. "I think I'll just watch."

I shook my head and smiled. "You didn't really want to help, did you?"

He chuckled. "No, I just wanted to be with you."

My smile grew bigger at his words. He just wanted to be with me. I pinched myself to make sure I wasn't just dreaming.

Nope, this was really happening right now.

I pulled the frosting out of the fridge and grabbed a small spatula. As I worked at the counter, Noah stepped behind me—the warmth of his body against my back made it really hard to concentrate on my work. I slowly spread the frosting on the cupcake with a shaky hand. Noah pressed his lips to the top of my head, taking my shoulders in his hands and massaging them.

"I really like you, Lexi," he whispered. "Even though I shouldn't."

He brushed the hair off my neck and kissed me there, too. Chills raced down my spine. I tried to draw in a decent breath, but his closeness and the way I was feeling was making it impossible.

"Tell me you want me, too?" His voice was low and husky. He kissed the skin near the neckline of my dress.

I released a shaky breath. "I do," I whispered as his hands ran down my shoulders, along my arms, and up again, and it felt so amazing.

I couldn't concentrate on frosting the cupcakes anymore. I set the spatula back in the frosting bowl and the half-frosted cupcake on the counter. "You're making it really hard to work, you know." I peeked over my shoulder at him.

"And you're making it really hard for me to get you out of my head," he whispered in my ear before spinning me around to face him. He stepped closer, trapping me between the counter and his strong body. My heart, which was already racing, catapulted to new speeds that I was sure would put me at risk for a heart attack.

And before I could register what was happening, he tilted his face down and pressed his lips to mine. His warm lips moved slowly as he kissed me tentatively—giving me a chance to move away. But I didn't. I leaned closer, sliding my hands up his neck until they could tangle in his hair—the hair I'd been dying to touch all week. It was even softer than I'd imagined.

"I think I need to warn you now about how much I love to have my hair played with," he whispered against my lips, his hot breath making me tingle all over.

"Y-you do?" I couldn't breathe. Couldn't concentrate on anything but how much I wanted his lips back on mine.

"Yeah," he said before closing the distance between our mouths once again. Electricity sparked in my veins as he coaxed my lips to move with his. He kissed me slowly, passionately, and all I could think about was how he'd said that he liked me. I'd waited years for him to notice me the way a guy notices a girl, but I never thought it was really possible. So I moved on. Then I found someone else to crush on...but I should have known my feelings for Noah would never really go away .

I had liked Noah from almost the moment we'd met.

"If someone told you a week ago that we'd be doing this, would you have believed them?" he asked, briefly breaking the lock he had on my lips.

"Definitely not." I sighed. Wished for, yes. But actually happen? Never in a million years.

And then he was kissing me again. His soft lips sent shivers through my nerves, shivers that made my whole body tremble in a way it never had before. When he'd kissed me yesterday, it had been because of our arrangement. But this wasn't an agreed-upon kiss. He was kissing me because he wanted to.

And the thought that Noah Taylor wanted to kiss me, when he could be kissing any other girl at school, made my muscles go weak. He really did like me, right? It couldn't just be a physical thing, could it? He would have taken Raven up on her obvious offers if this was just to fill some sort of physical need, wouldn't he?

"Do you think it's possible to know someone for years but never really see them?" he asked, his voice low.

I swallowed. "I think so."

His hands rubbed circles along my spine, raising goosebumps everywhere. He leaned his forehead against mine. "But..." He sighed. "Getting mixed up with me is probably the last thing you want."

He was worried I didn't want to get mixed up with him ? "It's not." I looked straight into his eyes, so he'd know I meant what I was saying.

"But what about your dad?"

"What about him?" My dad didn't get to control everything in my life. He didn't get to control my heart. I'd had a hard-enough time controlling it over the past couple of years when I tried to force it away from Noah.

But my heart wanted what it wanted. It wanted Noah.

"I don't have the perfect history, Lexi." He spoke in a husky voice. "I have a past."

I curled a strand of his shaggy hair around my finger. "It doesn't matter."

It was almost as if those words released a barrier between us, because when he kissed me again, it was different somehow. It changed and deepened and made all my thoughts disappear.

His hands traveled down my sides until he gripped my waist in his hands, pulling me even closer to him. We were already so close, but I loved how he didn't seem to want any space between us because I didn't want any space, either.

"Hey Noah, your phone keeps vibrating, you might want to get it." Easton's voice drifted up the stairs.

Noah pulled back from me and yelled back to Easton, "I'll get it in a minute." Then he turned to me with a smile and spoke in a quieter voice. "I'm a little busy right now. "

I could have died from the suggestive look on his face. But he didn't give me a chance to do anything because a second later, he was kissing me again. This time his lips were rougher, hungrier, and I worried that I wouldn't be able to keep up with him.

I pulled back. "Wait, don't you need to get your phone?" I asked, needing a moment to catch my breath.

He shook his head. "My mom’s probably just calling to make sure I'm not sleeping in my car again. I'll get it when I'm done with you."

He tightened his grip on my waist once more, and before I knew it, I was sitting on the end of the counter amidst all my baking mess. I gasped. "Noah, what are you...?" I let my question hang in the air, looking down so he'd know I was talking about suddenly being on the counter.

His gaze softened. "Just think of it as one of your step stools."