Chapter 69

CHAPTER 69

LOGAN

W hen we got back to the cottage, I got the grill started, and we headed inside to make a salad together. Mira pulled out a cutting board and two knives and I went to collect the fresh ingredients from the fridge, but my mind had been racing since I'd realized in the car how much we now knew about each other.

A couple months ago, Slate had made the point that we didn't know each other well enough to commit to a life together. At the time, it had been a damn valid point, but now, we knew all those things about each other that we hadn't known then—and so much more.

I took it as a sign that it was time to bring up the future again, suss her out and see how she was feeling about the possibility of a lifetime with me now. "When we have kids, do you think we'll still have time to fly out to the rig so often?"

Mira did a slow double-take and laughed as she inclined her chin toward the knife in her hand. "Could you have asked me that question when I wasn't in danger of slicing a finger off?"

"That's why I asked before I gave you anything to cut," I said, setting the armful of salad stuff down on the counter between us. "The way I see it, having kids would mean flying out to the rig would have to take a back seat. I don't only want to be with them half the time and I think the rig could operate smoothly enough now without having us physically present so often."

"Well, it would definitely operate smoothly enough without you being present," she teased, but then she took a closer look at me and her brows jumped. "Wait, are you being serious? Are we actually talking about our future and our children right now? You're not joking?"

"I'm not joking." I braced my palms against the cool counter, hoping that it would make me seem confident rather than that I was just actively avoiding the knives right now. "I've been thinking about it since it came up that first time, and when we have kids, I'd want to be there for as much of it as I can. Obviously, there will be times when we won't be able to be there, but going out to the rigs for days, weeks, or months at a time puts a different spin on things."

"You've only ever been there for a few days at a time," she said quietly, her eyes hooking on mine. "That means that what you're really asking is whether I'd be able to stay away from it?"

"Well, sure, but we'd both have to slow down. Either way, I'm not making the choice for you. All I'm saying is I wouldn't only want to be with them half the time."

"Me neither," she admitted after a beat. "I've never actually thought about the logistics, and I definitely never thought I'd ever want to put my career on pause, but for a family with you, there's nothing I wouldn't do."

I pushed away from the counter and walked around it to press a soft kiss to her forehead. "No pressure. I'm just telling you how I feel. It seemed pretty important to you back then, and because of that, I've really been giving it some serious thought."

She pulled back to look into my eyes again, hers soft and sparkling as she smiled. "Thank you. I know you wouldn't have been thinking about it at all if not for me, so thanks for taking it seriously."

I chuckled, shrugging. "You're not the only one who would do anything for us to have a family. I should go put the steaks on. They only take a few minutes to cook."

A dreamy expression crossed her features as she went to work on the salad. I left her to it and brought the steaks back to the kitchen when they were done. We ate at the little dining-room table overlooking the lake, and when we were done, I got up and held out my hand. "How about a walk?"

"Is it still warm out there?" she asked even as she placed her palm in mine.

I nodded. "It was while I was grilling. We don't have to go far, though. Maybe just to the shore? If it gets cool, we'll be close."

She smiled, falling into step beside me and swinging our joined hands between us as we walked. The only light I could see was what was spilling out of the cottage and an orange globe that was mounted on the dock.

Without so much as a breath of wind, the water was perfectly still and the night was warm enough that we would even be able to swim. Mira glanced up at me with a devilish grin spreading on her lips. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Skinny dipping?"

Her mouth popped open and she squealed with laughter. "No, I was thinking that we should go put on our suits and then go for a swim. We can't go skinny dipping."

"Why not?" I held my hands out to my sides, taking an exaggerated look around before grinning at her. "Only the stars will see you out here, love."

She suddenly took a step closer to me, her eyes on mine as she reached for my shirt. "Take it off then, big guy. Let's see you put your money where your mouth is."

"With pleasure." I lifted my arms and let her take the shirt off. Then I kicked off my pants and got her naked before scooping her up with one arm under her knees and the other around her back.

She laughed, clinging to me. I ran into the lake, the warm water splashing up around us. When we were about waist deep, I pretended to drop her.

"Don't you dare!" she threatened, still laughing as she started trying to wriggle free.

"Fine." I pouted before I set her down. Abandoning all pretense, I smoothed out my features and placed my palms on top of the water, the surface rippling now that we were here. I looked out at the trees towering around the lake and finally turned back to see the cottage from this angle, getting a thrill out of knowing that all this was only ours for the next few days.

"Look at that," Mira said beside me. "The water is so clear, I can see my toes."

I chuckled and looked down, ignoring my semi and seeing that she was right. "Wow. That's pretty cool. Look at all those little stones down there."

She let out a soft sigh. When I glanced at her, she was staring intently at the water with a strange look on her face. I frowned. "What's wrong?"

"What?" She turned her head to meet my eyes, then smiled. "Oh, it was nothing. I was just, uh, I was wondering if you know how to skip stones. My dad and Slate were so good at it when I was a kid, but I sucked. It's definitely not something I'd be able to teach our children."

"Don't worry. I've got them." I reached for her, pulling her into me and brushing a few tendrils of damp hair behind her ears.

With her face bathed in the moonlight and that orange glow from the dock, she seemed so impossibly soft and beautiful that it was hard to believe that she really wanted a future with me. There was nothing wrong with my self-esteem, but shit.

I'd heard guys talk about what an honor it had been to have been chosen by their women, but this was the first time that it was really occurring to me what an incredible fucking honor it really was that Mira chose me. Despite my past, every morning when she woke up, she chose me.

Humbled beyond belief, I cradled her cheek in my palm and resolved to keep becoming the kind of man who deserved that honor. "I was okay at skipping stones, but I'll learn. I'll get better. By the time our kids are old enough, I'll be a pro."

Her smile widened, but her eyes were still searching. "You really are serious, aren't you? About all this kid stuff, I mean. I don't want you to feel pressure?— "

"I'm not feeling pressure, Mira. I'm excited. I want to do this. I want to plan a future. With you. I want to talk about how many kids we want and what we want to name them. I want to start talking about school districts and buying a house in a good one. I'm not sure what else there is, but whatever we need to talk about, let's do it. I'm excited."

"So am I," she murmured as she pushed up on her toes to kiss me, but before I could deepen it, she pushed off me. Laughing, she landed in a spray of water and stayed on her back, floating with her gaze on the sky. "Come watch the stars with me. Then we'll talk."

I flopped onto my back unceremoniously, enveloped by the water as I spread out beside her. We floated just like that for a few minutes, staring up at the inky sky and the glittering stars above.

Mira broke the silence, her voice slightly muffled because my ears were underwater, but I heard her just fine. "I want two kids, but I'd be okay with one. It depends on how long it takes us and how we feel when the first one is there. If we have a third, I'd be okay with that too, but I feel like more than that, and we'd be stretched too thin."

"Three, it is," I said decisively, hearing her answering giggle through the water and feeling like the warm sound of it was caressing me just as surely. "Once we have the first three, we can talk about numbers four and five."

"Wow. You're brave. I don't know how many guys these days are up to having so many before they've even had one, but I'm willing to bet it's not many."

I thought about it for a beat. "Honestly, I'd be good with two. I just always used to see those big families when I was a kid and I remember thinking how fun it would be to be a part of something like that, but I see your point. How about we settle on two, but we keep an open mind to discuss it more once they're there?"

"Deal," she said happily. "What about names? Do you have any preferences?"

I hummed at the back of my throat. "I think I kind of like names that are unisex. If you're asking if I have any names in my family that I'd like to continue, the answer is no. We don't have to call our first son Logan. Do you have any?"

"Unisex names like what, Charlie?"

"Yeah, that's a good one, but it's only if you don't want to call our first daughter Mira."

She giggled again. "No, I'm fine, but thanks. I like Charlie. I also like Harper and Alex. I love Alex, actually."

"So do I," I agreed, and it was true. I really did love it. A weird spark of energy shot through me, elevating my heartrate and making me feel almost impatient. "Did we just decide on the name of our first kid?"

"We might have." She chuckled. "Let's add it to a list somewhere. Once I'm pregnant, we can decide if it feels right."

"Maybe this time next year, we can come back here and you'll have a baby in your tummy." Just the thought of it made my fingers itch to reach for her and take her right here.

Mira, on the other hand, sent a spray of water toward me. "Slow your roll, babe. I'm not making babies with you until you put a ring on my finger."

A mental image of the ring I already had floated into my head. "That can be arranged."

She splashed me again. "Good. Because I don't want to wait forever."

I laughed. "It's only been two months. That's hardly forever."

"Well, when you know, you know," she repeated the words back to me that I'd said to Slate that night and my heart skipped and lurched behind my ribs.

All the signs were there today. It made me feel like the universe was trying to tell me that she'd caught up. She was ready now too, and it filled my entire being with that same energy. Except that it wasn't just a spark anymore, it was a current.

I stood up in the water and waded through it to where she was still floating. I didn't give an answer when she looked at me quizzically as she wound her arms around my neck, her eyes wide and vulnerable on mine .

Instead, I just wrapped my arms around her hips and kissed her, my cock straining to reach her entrance. She laughed softly. "We aren't trying for a baby right now, so what's going on?"

"We can at least practice ," I murmured against her neck, needing to be buried inside her more than I'd ever needed anything. That energy was frantic, buzzing through me like an out of control lightning storm pushing me to really make her mine.

Two months ago, when I'd almost asked her to marry me, it'd been on a whim. But as much as I hadn't thought it through properly then, I had been ready. I'd been waiting all this time for her to be ready too, and now that she was, I didn't want to wait any longer.

I couldn't. It felt like my very fucking life depended on it.