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Chapter 11Nix

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Nix

T he car ride to Maine was about as icy as could be. Not the roads—it was still too early in the season for snow, Nix was sorry to note—but Ivan himself.

"Why couldn't you just break into Coop's place and have a little look-see for the Book?" Nix asked once again. He'd been ignored his last two attempts, but he was hoping the third time was, in fact, the charm.

They'd gone to Cooper's apartment building after he hadn't picked up Ivan's calls, but there'd been no answer at his door. Apparently Ivan's shy cousin hadn't been at home.

"His security is insane," Ivan finally answered, his hands clenching hard enough on the steering wheel to whiten his knuckles. They'd left sweet Oleg behind, in the hopes that his presence in the city would suggest to Sergei that Ivan had remained in New York, and Ivan was driving them. "I can't break through it without help, and we don't have time for that. "

His eyes stayed straight ahead even as he spoke to Nix. As if he was too focused on the road to even glance Nix's way.

Except Nix knew better.

Nix, for his part, was slouched in his seat, his legs up on the dashboard despite Ivan's insistence they remain on the floor. If he was going to be given the cold shoulder, he was at least going to be annoying about it.

So, okay, maybe he should have realized this would be a big deal to Ivan, considering how adamant he'd been that Sascha not hold on to the Book. But Nix had thought it was more about Ivan's fixation with his brothers than actually wanting the damned thing close.

Nix narrowed his eyes at Ivan's hands on the steering well. He didn't like them there. At least, not both of them—one of them should have been on Nix's thigh, gripping tightly. That was their thing , even when Ivan was pretending to not be into it. He'd fake indifference, but his actions would say otherwise.

Now, though, Ivan's actions were sending the message that he didn't give a flying fig if Nix was there or not.

It made for a very long drive to Seacliff.

An eternity or so later (wherein Ivan wouldn't even allow Nix to listen to some decent music on the radio, too busy stewing in frigid silence), they arrived at a sweet-looking coastal town, eventually pulling up to a Victorian home not far from the downtown area.

It was Sascha who opened the door, his eyes wide in surprise even as Kai loomed over his shoulder, all big and blue and horned—meaning he'd heard them coming and knew not to bother with a human disguise.

Apparently he hadn't had time to inform Sascha, because the human was gaping. "Ivan… What—?"

Nix gave Ivan a sidelong glance. "You did tell your brother we were coming, didn't you? "

Ivan ignored him, looking to Sascha. "You said I was welcome."

Sascha crossed his arms, his brows dropping. "I said you were welcome if you were able to not act like a complete dick."

"You said I needed to act human. You didn't say anything about not being a dick."

Sascha's lips twitched, much in the same way Ivan's did when he was trying his best not to smile. He sighed, stepping back from the door and opening his arm in reluctant welcome. "Well, I didn't think you'd take me up on it, like, immediately, but come on in."

Some of Ivan's frostiness eased, just a touch. Nix could see it—if only for the briefest moment—how fond Ivan was of his brother, before Ivan swept past Sascha and Kai into the house like they didn't exist, leaving Nix on the porch with them.

Sascha seemed unfazed by the rudeness. "Hello," he said to Nix, adorably shy all of a sudden.

Nix grinned at him. "Hi, cutie."

Kai cleared his throat, the scowl on his face a marked contrast to Sascha's shy smile. "What are you two doing here?"

Speaking of rudeness.

Nix batted his lashes, knowing it would piss Kai off. "Maybe we wanted a cozy little getaway."

Kai scoffed. "Doesn't look very cozy to me."

No, it didn't, did it? Nix pressed his lips into a pout, looking to Sascha for commiseration. "He's angry with me."

Sascha waved a dismissive hand, leaning back against Kai, his shyness seeming to ease with a familiar topic of conversation. "He's always angry. What does he think you did wrong?"

"Something he's decided is some sort of betrayal."

Sascha's smile dropped. "Oof."

Oof? What the fuck did "oof" mean? Nix had been looking for reassurance, not confirmation that he was completely fucked. "Is it that bad?"

"Well, our brother, Alexei, supposedly betrayed him about two years ago. He stayed away, but Ivan still held a massive grudge and may have fired a gun at him the next time they saw each other."

Ah, yes, the attempted fratricide. Well, that had clearly been Alexei's first mistake—staying away. A man like Ivan couldn't be left to stew in his own miseries. It gave him too much of an opportunity to shore up his defenses.

Nix wouldn't be making the same mistake.

They found Ivan in the living room, standing over what at first glance appeared to be a pile of blankets. Except, at second glance, there was definitely a hooded head poking out of it. A young man stared up at Ivan, big brown eyes blinking rapidly.

There was another resident in the house.

"I forgot about the stray," Ivan said, looking down at whoever he was.

And apparently Ivan already knew about him. Nix tried not to pout. He hated being left in the dark.

"Be nice to Matteo," Sascha scolded, shooting the young man a reassuring smile.

"Why?" Ivan asked, his eyes still on the "stray," as he'd called him.

"Because otherwise you have to go," Sascha told him, a bit of brattiness in his tone now. "It's his house now too."

Ivan turned to shoot him a look. "I bought this house."

"And what an investment," Sascha said dryly. "There's only one other guest room made up, but I can—"

"Nix and I will stay in the same room," Ivan interrupted.

Nix perked up at that even as Sascha blinked in surprise.

"Oh." Sascha cocked his head, studying Ivan. Or, most likely, studying the impressive array of hickeys Nix had left the night before. "Okay…"

"I want my demon close at hand." Ivan raised a brow, as if daring Sascha to question him. "Is that a problem? "

Kai growled. "Speak to Sascha nicely or I'll throw you out myself."

"I think—I think I'll go upstairs," the young man Sascha had called Matteo stammered, climbing out of his nest of blankets and bolting away.

Well, weren't they all off to a lovely start?

Some hours later, dinner was no less tense. Ivan clearly didn't want to get into the reason for them being there, so they all made awkward small talk, followed by slightly less awkward talk about the business he was setting Sascha up with.

"You still like it here?" Ivan eventually asked Sascha.

Sascha's lips quirked into a small smile. "You mean have I changed my mind since a few weeks ago?" He shook his head. "I still like it here."

Ivan sneered in the direction of the window, where dark clouds had gathered. "I hope you like it just as much when you're snowed in for months on end."

There was resentment there, pulsing out of him in little waves, and not directed at Nix for the moment. Did Ivan not like that his little brother had relocated? Maybe for all his posturing about his useless brothers, he'd enjoyed having Sascha close.

"Oh, Kai will keep me warm," Sascha crooned, finally showing a hint of sass. Nix approved. "Demons run hot, you know." Sascha's eyes flicked to Nix, then back to Ivan. "Not that you'd know anything about that, would you, Vanya?" he asked sweetly.

Matteo, who'd crept back down to dinner at the very last minute and was nibbling at his pizza crust like a little mouse, choked.

Ivan only cocked a brow coolly. "I must keep him fed, mustn't I? He's an incubus. His tastes are…specific."

"The contract should keep him fed well enough," Kai broke in, sounding disapproving.

Nix stuck his tongue out at him. He didn't need his meddling .

"I'm afraid I need him in top form," Ivan countered. Meanwhile, he still hadn't so much as looked at Nix this entire dinner.

"What does an incubus eat?" Matteo asked, his curiosity seemingly stronger than his timidity for the moment.

Ivan glanced at him. "He's a sex demon, little stray. What do you think?"

Matteo immediately flushed beet red, dropping his gaze back to his plate.

Nix shot him a wink anyway.

It was hard to shock Nix, but he was still a little bit surprised when, after shutting themselves in their shared bedroom, Ivan began undoing his belt buckle, his eyes suddenly molten hot.

"Strip," he ordered, his voice somehow still as cold as it had been all day, in sharp contrast to the heat of his gaze.

Nix gaped at him. "Excuse me?"

"Strip."

So Nix hadn't misheard. This fucking human.

"No." Nix's tail flicked in agitation even as heat pooled in his belly at Ivan's commanding tone. That wasn't his fault though. His body was all hardwired to find Ivan's bossiness sexy. "You're too angry with me for that."

Ivan narrowed his eyes at him. "I'm tense and annoyed. I like to fuck when I'm tense and annoyed."

Nix hummed, stepping to the bed and taking a seat on the foot of it, crossing one leg over the other. "Sounds delightful," he said truthfully. "But not when you're annoyed with me ." He pursed his lips into a mock pout. "I'm very sensitive, you know."

Ivan seemed to realize only then that Nix was serious in his denial. He paused by the door, his hands still on his belt. "I thought you liked that I'm vicious," he said coolly, managing to sound accusing. Like Nix was the problem here.

"Oh, I do, darling. But there's vicious, and there's…this." Nix waved a hand to encompass all Ivan's nonsense. "You don't get to ice me out and then fuck your anger out on me." He cocked his head, bouncing his foot. If they were talking things out all of a sudden… "Why are you so angry?" he asked.

"You know why."

Right, right. Betrayal and messing with his plans and blah, blah, blah. That explained the source of Ivan's annoyance but not the depth of it. Nix clucked his tongue. "Try again."

Ivan stared at him for a long moment, and then it was like a dam burst, his frozen exterior cracking and real frustration breaking through for the first time since the apartment. He jerked a shaky hand through his hair. "I don't know . I just…get like this."

Now they were getting somewhere, at least. Nix fought back a smile. He didn't want Ivan to think he was teasing him. "When someone does something you don't like?" he asked.

"When someone…undermines me."

"Is that what I did?"

"Yes."

"It wasn't my intention."

Ivan rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Intention doesn't matter. End results matter. Disobedience is the first step to losing control. And loss of control means death."

"Another lesson from Daddy Dearest?"

Ivan glared at him through his fingers. "Just because he was an asshole doesn't mean he was always wrong."

"As far as I'm concerned, it does."

Of all the ridiculous lessons to teach someone. Had Ivan's father wanted him to fail, or had he simply been that misguided? And would it be wrong to find out where Ivan's father was buried just to piss on the grave ?

"I loosened the leash on Sascha for the first time, and look what happened—he's married to a demon."

"He seems happy enough with his choice to me." Nix could see it—and feel it—well enough at dinner, even with the tension between Ivan and everyone else. Sascha had a way of gravitating toward Kai, and Kai toward him in return. The big warrior demon was clearly Sascha's place of safety.

"Happy to be away from me, more like," Ivan said bitterly. "He hated being under my control." Pale-blue eyes met Nix's. "Will you grow to resent me in the same way?"

"I can stand up for myself."

When Ivan continued to stand there, frozen like a statue, Nix sighed, deciding to go the way of patience rather than petulance.

"You can never have perfect control over other people, Ivan," he found himself explaining, as if he were the human and Ivan a demon new to this realm. "Even if you lead by fear. Even if you're the scariest motherfucker in the entire universe and they know one misstep means their balls are getting chopped off. Do you know why?" he asked.

Ivan only stared.

"Because every individual has their own desires, and sometimes those will interfere with yours. You wanted the Book under your control. I wanted to give my friend a chance. Conflicting desires. Not betrayal. Not the end of the world."

Ivan slumped back against the door. "Are you a therapist as well as a sex worker now?"

Nix huffed a breath. "If only. You could use about a decade's worth."

"If I can never have perfect control, then what's the point of our little change of leadership tactics? Sounds like I'm fucked either way."

Nix leaned back on his hands. "Generally, followers who are given respect give respect in turn. It's more effective than fear. But if you're really so paranoid about the Mafia shit blowing up in your face, why not go legitimate? You can be rich and powerful without playing at gang wars."

Ivan pinched at the bridge of his nose, as if Nix's very sound reasoning was giving him a headache. "It doesn't work like that. You don't get to just…go legitimate."

"Who says?" At Ivan's face, Nix cackled meanly. "Of course. Your father." He put as much disdain into the title as he could manage.

Ivan released his hold on his nose, glaring. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Fine."

Ivan stared at him, his eyes tracking Nix's crossed legs. He growled in frustration. "I want to fuck you."

"Too bad."

"Closing your legs indefinitely because I've pissed you off? Might as well be my wife."

Nix narrowed his eyes. "Misogyny aside, don't tempt me with a good time." He sighed again. He really should be billing hours for this conversation, shouldn't he? "Your want for me is too tied to your frustration right now. And while I've been used by humans for a variety of purposes, none of which had to do with me, it hasn't been like that with you, and I don't want to start a new pattern. Got it?" He patted the covers invitingly. "I'll still share your bed tonight. I'll even pet your hair the way you like because I'm a fucking saint like that. But your cock will have to fend for itself."

All at once, Ivan's ire deflated again. He dragged his hands down his face. "I don't know what the fuck's wrong with me."

"Too many things to count," Nix told him cheerfully. "But luckily I am, as we've already established, a fucking saint, so I have the infinite patience needed to deal with all of them."

Ivan took a step away from the door. "I'm still angry with you. "

"I'm sure you are. Want to cuddle about it?"

Ivan whipped his belt out of his pants, tossing it on the floor. "I don't cuddle."

"Now who's the liar?" Nix let his clothes disappear off his body, leaving him in tight black briefs. He lay down over the covers.

"No lacy panties?" Ivan asked.

"You don't deserve them." Nix pointed a finger at him, repeating Ivan's earlier words, "Now strip ."

Ivan scowled but did as Nix commanded, stripping down to his underwear and showcasing that delicious bulge Nix wanted to put his mouth on more than a little bit. But that would undermine all that hard-won communication they'd just sort of succeeded at, so instead he turned to his side.

"Spoon me," he ordered.

Ivan climbed onto the bed and lay behind him, wrapping an arm around Nix and tugging him close. So close it might have been hard to breathe, if Nix had needed to do so. A heavy leg draped over Nix's thigh, Ivan's erection snug against Nix's ass.

Nix settled into the hold, feeling at ease for the first time all day. "For someone who doesn't cuddle, you're very aggressive about it."

Ivan's fingers curled into Nix's chest. "It's because you're so infuriating. I have to get my frustration out somehow."

"And is it helping?" Nix asked, stroking the blond hairs on Ivan's arm.

There was a long silence, and then Ivan's forehead settled against the back of Nix's neck, his answer muffled but unmistakable. "Yes. It's helping."

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