24. Noelle

Something was wrong.

I didn"t panic when the scouts came back. I knew it was possible, probable even, that they"d return without Ryklin. They had a different mission. They"d found no sign of Solara or Rook, and a pall hung over the entire camp.

Astrid tried comforting me, and when that didn"t work, she put me on lunch duty to keep my mind occupied. But lunch was over, the camp was fed, and my mate still wasn"t back. It was bad enough to think that I might be stuck on Nebula forever, but to be stuck here without my mate was unbearable.

I"d only known for a day—less than that—but already I needed him like the air I breathed.

I needed to find him.

Working lunch duty had given me some information about the storehouses of the camp, and I tried not to feel too guilty as I snuck in. As Astrid said, food wasn"t an issue here. They wouldn"t miss a few rations or the sack I borrowed to carry them. And if all went well, at least I could return the bag. Besides, Ryklin and I were trying to get Astrid and her people a ticket off of Nebula. They wouldn"t need the rations anyway.

"What are you doing?" Astrid caught me stuffing apples into the bag.

Justifying my actions to myself so I don"t feel bad about this. I didn"t say that. Obviously. "Ryklin should be back by now." I took some day-old bread too. No use hiding what I was doing; I"d already been caught. "I can"t just leave him out there."

"He may have been captured. We all knew that was a risk." Her tone was gentle, but her words were cruel.

"I can"t just leave him out there. You don"t understand." My entire soul was screaming at me to run after him. The fact that I hadn"t already was a testament to my willpower and restraint.

"You think you"re the first person to lose someone they love?"

Love.

The word blasted through me, echoing down deep.

It was one thing to think about mates, about him calling me denya, about what that meant. But love was what humans called it, how we made our partnerships. It was something built over time, something that grew and flourished as couples grew together.

Could I love him already?

It was so fast, and yet …

And yet.

"I have to try, Astrid." I slung the straps over my shoulders. The pack wasn"t too heavy. I"d only taken enough food for a day or two.

Astrid pursed her lips, and it quickly turned into a grimace. Then she shook her head and reached for one of the packs hanging on a hook on the wall. "Damn it. I can"t just let you go alone."

Maybe I should have protested, but having someone who knew the terrain would make finding Ryklin easier.

Because I was going to find him. There was no other option.

Astrid grabbed more apples and bread along with something that looked like jerky that I hadn"t noticed. Then she pulled two canteens off a shelf and handed them to me. "Fill these, but don"t let anyone see you."

There was a rainwater tank around the back of the storehouse, and I did as she instructed.

Astrid looked a bit conflicted as we snuck out of the camp and into the forest. It was late afternoon, and night would begin to fall soon. No doubt someone would come looking for her. But she hadn"t wasted any time telling people where she was going.

"We know that Ryklin made it to the miners camp," Astrid told me as we climbed the ridge that lead to the edge of the camp. "Galen reported back that all was well when he last saw him. It may just be that he"s had to hide to escape detection. Or he"s chosen to lie low so as not to risk a hike over unfamiliar terrain once night falls." She shot me a look at that.

Okay, fine, maybe not my smartest move, but I was desperate.

"Do you think that"s what he"s doing?" I asked.

She didn"t answer.

And that was answer enough.

We hiked in silence, Astrid"s expression growing grimmer with each step. Birds chirped like mad in the trees, and a brave rabbit darted in front of us.

"Will you go back when we get in touch with Nebula Outpost?" I asked. I needed to say something; my mind was going crazy with worry.

"If I could, I"d lay in a hot bath for three hours and then take a shower and do the whole thing again." She sounded wistful. "There"s a hot spring about three miles away, but we have to get together a whole party to go there, some people guarding while others bathe, then the other way around. There"s never enough time to fully relax. Mostly I just bathe in the river these days."

"So, is that a yes? Do you think anyone would like to stay?" I couldn"t imagine it, but some people liked living in nature.

"If we could have some actual medical supplies, maybe a doctor, maybe some real tech, I think some people would definitely stay. And some people living up on the station would want to come down. If you can get in touch."

I opened my mouth to insist help was coming when a loud blast rang out behind us.

Astrid dove for the ground and took me with her. We both lay there barely breathing, trying to figure out what was going on.

Another blast came a moment later. I could feel Astrid"s flinch.

"That"s the camp," she said. "It"s under attack."

"Go. Help. I"ll be fine." It was getting dark, but we"d taken a flashlight with us. I could do this. I could find Ryklin.

"No, you can"t stay out here alone." Her expression was conflicted. "You need to come back with me."

"I"m going to find Ryklin. You can come with me, or you can go back to them, but don"t try and stop me." He was in trouble, and he needed my help.

She nodded once, and she clearly wasn"t happy about it. "Act quick. If they"re attacking us, they may be distracted. Keep walking straight until you see the encampment. It"s another mile or so." Then she turned and started running back the way we came.

As her form retreated, I realized just how alone I was.

Go straight. Find Ryklin. Get home.

I could do this. I had to find my mate.