4. Fallen

Chapter 4

Fallen

THORIN

"You're here," I whispered to Catalina.

"Thorin," her worshipful voice struck a chord in my heart, as if the damn thing could play its own notes. Catalina's dark hair draped over her shoulders. She was always far paler than most shifters and her nearly black hair made her skin seem even lighter than it really was. Her ice blue eyes also gave her a glacial, unapproachable appearance. Many shifters had a hard time meeting her eyes when she spoke to them. It never bothered me because I knew she wasn't the ice princess they all tried to pretend she was. Catalina had been warm and caring when she was with me.

"You're here." Reverence bled through my words of astonishment. It had been too long since I'd seen her sweet face.

"You must listen to me, my love, as our time here is short. There is another waiting for you to claim her. Your moon-blessed mate."

"No." I couldn't be blunter if I tried. There would never be another. Not one that I would claim. Catalina should have been mine. She never had the mate dreams, which could only mean that her mate died before his time. Despite my extensive travels, I never came across my own mate either. I searched for many years before Catalina and I decided it was time to give in and take our friendship to the next level. Unfortunately, she was taken from the world before we could perform the mating ceremony that would bind us together.

"Thorin, you must. You know as well as everyone else that if you do not have a Luna by your side, you won't be able to rule the pack long before the madness takes over. You're already on borrowed time."

"I can't replace you," I argued.

"You are not replacing me. We will always hold a spot for one another in our souls. It is the way of our people."

"Then how can you tell me to take another?"

"Because you must." She glanced away. Her dark hair curtained her face and hid her from me momentarily before she finally looked up again. "You must love again. We were never mates. We were not meant to be. I had no mate dreams - not because a mate didn't exist for me, but because I wouldn't exist for another long enough to fulfill a bond. My fate was never to be your Luna. You will mate and it will be a beautiful union. I've seen what fate has in store for you."

"I would have enjoyed a beautiful union with you."

"We were never moon-blessed mates, and you know that."

"My moon-blessed mate never came for me. You were my chosen, that makes it better."

She shook her head. "I've learned much since my earthly bonds were severed, my lovely Alpha. My fate was never meant to be by your side. Had I not been taken; we might have known that before we moved forward and eased your conscience."

"You're saying you didn't want to be mated to me?"

"No. I'm saying that my fate was inevitable and that I was never intended to be yours."

"You know that I gave up the right to my moon-blessed mate when I chose you. No matter what, I would have chosen you, Cat."

Catalina shook her head once more. "No, you didn't. There is another for you and she awaits her second chance at a fated bond."

"Why would my supposed mate need another?"

"She was given a choice by Selene. The Goddess gave her that choice between two mates for reasons I cannot express to you. She is the only one who can decide which Alpha will be right for her. The actions of the other have made it impossible for her to agree to a bond with him, and that leaves her open to a different mating. With you." The last two words were whispered and made me shudder because I could feel the truth in them.

"How? If she is meant for me, then the other wolf would have to be Alpha too. Alphas do not willingly reject their mates unless there is something wrong with them. Who would be stupid enough to suffer the madness that would come for not just them, but their pack?"

Catalina gave me a knowing look because I had once been considered foolish when I wouldn't wait for my moon-blessed mate to find me. If Catalina hadn't been taken from this world before we were mated, I would have forsaken all others to take her as mine.

"I don't know why he rejected her, but Thorin, you must seek her out before it is too late. I can't stand the thought that you won't be there to lead our pack into greatness."

"Even if I were to agree, how would I go about finding this female? You know that I'd given up on being able to find my moon-blessed mate."

Catalina smiled sadly. "She is in the only place an Alpha would dare to send his rejected mate. He has a year to go fetch her before she is available for any wolf to claim her, so long as she's amenable."

"What if the year isn't up for them?"

"It won't matter in your case. She was intended for either of you. He tossed her away, that leaves her open to you, no matter the time that has or hasn't transpired."

"Will I see you again?" I asked as my former love began to fade from my vision.

"Not in this lifetime, my lovely. One day, maybe we'll meet again, and you can tell me all about the long and wondrous life you lived. By then, we'll be what we were fated to be all along, friends who hold a small flame for one another and nothing more."

"Catalina." I wanted to argue with her, but we both knew what we were to one another. We had what the elders referred to as a puppy love born of young wolves who thought fate would pair them together. Once we came into our final transition, and realized we weren't moon-blessed mates, we did try to do the right thing for our pack. We both attempted to find our mates, but neither of us had any luck.

It didn't help that neither of us received a blessing from the moon in the form of the visions that were sometimes handed to mates. I still hadn't been graced with a vision, but as my father was quick to point out, the females who are meant to be Lunas usually have the vision and then the Alpha is snapped into the bond upon first touch.

"We both know the truth in our hearts, Thorin. Now, go live! Find your other half. Your true other half. Time is of the essence."

I awoke to the pounding of my own erratic heartbeat with a new purpose. Catalina was right. The signs of madness had already begun to worm their way free of my control recently. During the last full moon, my wolf took complete control, and when I finally managed to wrestle back into the driver seat and shift to my human form, I was two states away and my pack hadn't heard from me in three days. It was like he had been running toward something, but because of the disconnect between wolf and man, since the death of our Catalina and the hope of discovering a mate had lessened, I couldn't figure out where he had been headed.

My wolf's journey made more sense in light of Catalina's answers. It was like he knew instinctively what Catalina had just informed me of in my dream vision. Our mate was in that direction. If he had been given another half day to travel, my wolf may have found our mate for us. I closed my eyes and engaged the pack bond with my beta, Warren.

Thorin: Need to take a trip to Mirage Island. Leaving first thing in the morning.

I sent the message through our mind link and received an answer back immediately.

Warren: Are you certain?

Thorin: Yes

Warren: Who do you want?

Thorin: All males who have not found their mates among our pack, or those who might want to see if there is a second-chance mate waiting for them.

I was ready to kick my own ass for never even thinking to look for my mate on Mirage Island. Then again, if she was moon-blessed to me, there had been no reason to think she might be there, where the rejected were left to the cruel fate of being outcasts. In truth, they were prisoners to the island unless someone came to rescue them. If the rumors were true, some of those ‘rescues' were a worse fate than being left on the island itself, since rogues would often go to the island to grab unmated females to breed.

Now that Catalina had shed light on the situation, I wondered how much time I had truly wasted. Had my mate been out there all along, and I hadn't searched hard enough for her? Would she ever forgive me for wanting to take another when I couldn't find her? It was possible that she never had to know about that. It wasn't like Cat and I ever completed the mating ceremony. Only time would tell how things played out, but time was something I wouldn't waste any longer. My mate was out there on that forsaken island, and I wouldn't hesitate to go retrieve her now that I knew she existed.