23

23

KADE

My eyes strain against the light as Stacey follows me out the hotel.

She hasn’t spoken a fucking word to me. I woke up in her bed, her on the floor with a blanket – shivering. I draped the duvet over her and snuck to my own room before she’d woken up.

She washed all the blood from my hands, arms and face, even my hair, and then slept on the hard floor.

I texted her an apology, and all she said was that we had fifteen minutes before we needed to leave.

The silence is starting to piss me right off.

When I ask if she wants to grab food, she hums. Hums. What the fuck is that? A yes or a fucking no?

“Where’s your car?” she asks, looking around the car park.

For a second, I have no clue as I look around too, then it dawns on me, and I blow out a breath, even more annoyed I wrecked it. “We need to get an Uber.”

“What happened to your car?”

I shrug and pull out a smoke. It’s probably still buried in a ditch, unless Barry cleaned that up too, but I haven’t heard from him yet.

She types on her phone as she leans against a wall, crossing her arms with a scowl on her face, then checks the time on her watch while tapping her foot. Amused, I lean against the railing and fill my lungs with something not nearly as poisonous as her.

My side is badly bruised, but I welcome the ache. It stops me from staring at Stacey and wanting to spark a conversation with her, to see her smile or have her on her knees again.

I think she was touching the bruise when I was asleep, unless I was hallucinating. I remember opening my eyes to her face screwed up in confusion as her fingertips traced the purpling skin, her lip quivering before everything went black again.

Just as I go to ask, she storms towards our ride. I have to hurry to catch up with her.

I should thank her for at least looking after me when I obviously couldn’t even speak.

“About earlier—”

“Don’t,” she warns. “Just get in the car, Kade.”

I frown at the way she says my name. “Fine. Luciella thinks we just got off the flight,” I say as we both get into the Uber. “We’ll stop somewhere for food and head to meet them. My gran won’t be there. She sadly has the flu.” The last part is sarcasm.

Nothing. No response.

If she wasn’t Stacey, my violent side would want to smash her head into the glass for ignoring me. Make her bleed. Scream for forgiveness.

The silent treatment I give her is for her own good.

Her ignoring me now is just childish behaviour.

I shouldn’t care that she won’t look at me, but I find myself growing agitated and a tad nervous that she’s blanking my existence. She’s the only person in the world to ever make me feel like this, and that makes me fist my hands in rage.

I’m Kade Mitchell. I don’t do emotions. I don’t care about people, especially not people who fuck me over. So why can’t I stop looking at her?

My phone dings with my next contract. Half a million. A club owner from where we’ll be staying. Known groomer.

The last part confirms I’ll enjoy it.

I read the file while Stacey stares out the window.

He got off with rape, stealing thousands from an old lady and drugging an underage girl before getting a blowjob off her.

When I get a hold of this prick, I’ll make it hurt. The family of the young girl is paying Bernadette – and me – more than enough to drag out the pain. They reached out to Bernie a few weeks ago, after hearing about her from relatives back in Scotland, and specifically asked for her best.

And I don’t ever disappoint.

The hotel we’re staying at has a pool round back, surrounded by loungers. Base has been sending me pictures of him on one with a beer. Mum and Ewan have made the most of the bar, and Luciella has impatiently waited on her best friend, who’s currently typing on her phone with a frown and chewing her thumbnail.

The silence is making me uneasy. Fuck it. “Sorry,” I say, folding my arms. “For waking you up. I was just…” High as fuck. “Drunk.”

She doesn’t take her eyes off her phone. “It’s fine.”

It’s not fucking fine. Look at me. Yell at me. Do fucking something.

We’ve spent the last twenty-four hours bickering and getting each other off, and now she can’t spare me a glance because I shot someone who was trying to sexualise her? Of course, she has no idea what happened the rest of the day, but I’ve just been doing my job.

A job I don’t fucking want.

But if I tell Bernadette that I’m out, both me and my dad will likely see a death sentence. The rest of my family will get worse.

I refused a contract not long ago, and she threatened my dogs. My fucking dogs.

Shaking my head, I lean my elbows on my knees. “Fine.” I’m useless. “Forget the last twenty-four hours.”

“Already forgotten.”

My hands fist with unnecessary rage, and I roll my jaw. “Good.”

When we reach the hotel, Stacey blanks me and leaves the car.

I need to tamp down my irritation and tell myself not to drag her into a room and bend her over my knee. This attitude of hers is absurd.

I hug my mum and nod at Base to follow me to our room as Luciella lets out an excited scream and grabs her friend for a cuddle.

“Mate, I have so many fucking stories for you,” Base says as he unlocks the hotel-room door. “We’re going out later, right? I had a threesome last night and kept their numbers!”

Luciella screws her face up as she and Stacey stop a few doors down from ours. Perfect. Just what I fucking need.

“Please, Sebastian, stop being so vulgar.”

Despite my infuriation right now, I fight a smirk as Base glares at her. “Don’t call me that.”

“It’s your name, is it not?” She opens her door; Stacey slips in without a word. My sister’s eyes burn into me. “Be ready in an hour. And don’t you dare ruin this for Dad.”

I narrow my brows. “Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?”

She shakes her head. “Someone who used to be my brother, but now he’s possessed by a fucking battered demon. Get a grip of yourself, Kade. When did you last sleep?”

I stare at her.

Base folds his arms in a huff. “Don’t call me Sebastian.”

“Okay, Sebastian,” Luciella shouts as she slams the door.

“I might kill your sister,” he says, shaking his head and picking up one of my bags. “She’s been doing my head in ever since we left the manor. I asked if she wanted to join—” He stops. “Never mind.”

Lovely.

The room is large, with two single beds, an en suite with a shower and bath, and a balcony that looks over the pool.

“Think they’ll come out tonight as well?” he asks as he drops onto his bed. “Luciella won’t give me the time of day, so maybe I’ll approach her best friend.”

“Sounds toxic.”

“Because I, Sebastian Ivanovich Prince, am toxic.” He winks at me, then says in Russian, “I’ll make your sister realise I’m her one true love by fucking her best friend.”

Eye twitching, I head for the bathroom to shower – again.

“Wait. Did you understand what I said?” Base sits up, confusion on his face. He has no idea I’m multilingual. “Hey, what’s up with you? You said you were cool with me liking Luciella?”

“I am.” I stop before I can close the door. “I’m just tired.”

He grunts. “Fine. I’ll make plans. Give me your phone. Mine is dead.”

I toss him it. I have all my work shit under passwords – the last thing I need is him knowing the secret life I live; that I’m not the engineering student he believes I am.

But he tilts his head as soon as he unlocks it. “Eh, Kade?” He rises from the bed, turning the screen to me, and my heart sinks. “Why do you have a picture of an ultrasound on your phone? You knock someone up?”

Before he can inspect the picture and see the woman’s name, I swipe it out of his hand. “Charge and use your own fucking phone, and no, I didn’t knock anyone up.”

“That was a baby scan.”

I shake my head. “I mean it, Base. Drop it.”

“I’m your best friend. You can tell me this shit. Who did you get pregnant? When are you going to be a dad? I need to know this shit! I’ll be Uncle Base!”

If only he knew how old this scan is.

I glare at him as I grip my phone in my palm. “Stop.”

Raising both hands, he stands back. He doesn’t believe me, but I don’t push the subject before getting back into the bathroom and trying not to fucking pass out from how fast my heart is racing.

Once the door is locked, I turn on the shower, waiting for the place to steam up with my head in my hands. I have the worst migraine building, I feel like I have blood and guts all over me, and I’m uncomfortable as fuck.

The scalding water burns my skin for ten minutes before I shut it off, get dressed and head down to reception to meet my mum, Ewan and my sister.

Base and Stacey aren’t coming to see my dad. Mum suggests they go for a drink and wait on us, which grinds my gears because I know for a fact Base will flirt with her until his tongue falls off.

The Uber to my dad’s facility takes half an hour, and Ewan talks to me about his new project and ways I can help. He’s been trying to get me back into construction with him; he’d probably noticed I’m a bit off the rails. I always enjoyed helping – it kept my head straight – but right now I have neither the time nor the mental capacity to focus on something like that.

Ewan tells us he’ll catch up in an hour, that he’s going to speak to someone in the building about a contractor. He always wants to give my parents time together. It helps Dad to have time with my mum. It’s quite the bond they have, considering their horrific history.

It’s a twisted love, and it’s warped Dad’s mind so much that he can’t focus on anyone else without comparing them to her or instantly becoming obsessive again.

He’s a diagnosed psychopath who loves Mum in his own way – learned, studied, even if it’s not the same way a neurotypical person would love. It’s limited, the way he feels, but it’s enough to never break the bond they have.

Kind of sad if you think about it. Being in love with the same woman for over twenty years and knowing they’ll never have a happy ending must be hard. Sometimes I compare their story to mine and Stacey’s, and wonder if I’ll still be watching her in twenty years.

Probably.

Shit. I am like my dad.

As soon as we get into the main area of the facility, an indoor park with a man-made pond, we spot Dad at the picnic bench – the one he always sits and waits at for visits.

He glances over his shoulder, and his eyes light up. “Hi, sweetheart,” he says as he gets to his feet and hugs Mum. They hold each other, as if they hadn’t just spent hours together yesterday. “Did you get a good sleep?”

“I did,” Mum replies, cupping his face and smoothing her thumbs over his skin. “You shaved. Did Luciella’s comment about getting grey hairs in your beard go to your head?”

He smirks. Mum grins and blushes.

Me and Luciella stand behind them in silence.

Dark and threatening eyes land on me, and for the first time in God knows how long, I think he might hit me. Anxiety scratches at me as he moves, studying my face, my eyes, all the tattoos I’ve acquired in the last two years. “Hello, son.”

Lips flattening, I nod. “Dad.”

Usually, when I visit, he’ll pull me in for a hug or offer me some words of encouragement about how good I look, how much my workouts have been doing me justice. But this time, he just stares, trying to read me.

With minimal sleep, a sore side from being shot, a bruised face from Crawley’s punch, a comedown and barely looking after my health the past three days, I’d be surprised if I looked normal right now. I’m probably drawn and looking exhausted. And I definitely forgot to sort my hair. It’s an abomination of curls and waves in all directions, hanging over my forehead.

Luciella breaks the awkward moment by cuddling him, and only then does he perk up and lead us to the pond area.

He holds my mum’s hand, Luciella hooks her arm around his and I walk behind them – silent, unable to even think of a conversation starter while they discuss what they’re planning to do over the next few days.

I shouldn’t be here. There’s no reason for me to be here.

He lost another appeal, but I already knew he’d lose it. He wanted to visit Scotland for a weekend, but because I failed to do as I was told, Bernadette made sure the appeal fell through, and now he’s permanently blocked from ever entering the United Kingdom.

I highly doubt any country would let him in anyway. He’s known worldwide as a psychotic madman.

Luciella slows to walk with me. “What’s wrong with you? Talk to him.”

I shrug. “I don’t know what to say.”

I haven’t visited my dad in nearly two years. The last time we had a huge argument and I overturned one of the picnic tables. He has more grey hairs now, but he’s kept at the gym they have here and eats healthily.

You’d think a man in his forties would at least look forty, but he’s just a slightly older version of me, with the same level of fitness. He’d probably be able to beat the shit out of me without trying.

“Maybe apologise first,” she says, watching him and my mother laugh about something as she rests her head on his shoulder. “You did call him a lunatic, a waste of oxygen and told him he was better off dead for what he did to Mum, before walking out on him.”

As soon as those words fell from my lips, I regretted them. But I was too fucking furious with him to turn around and say sorry, to take them all back. He was hurt by what I said – it was the first time I’d ever seen him cry.

He’d tried to agree with me, that Mum deserved everything that didn’t involve him, but I didn’t wait to hear him explain. I stormed out, blocked the institution’s number and went on with my life.

All because he tried to talk to me about Stacey. You don’t hate her, son. You’re just mad at her. He knew everything about us. There must be a reason she’s acting this way. Every trip. No one can change overnight. Every time I felt happy. He even knew when I asked her to be my girlfriend. You need to hear her out, Kade. If you love her, let her explain.

Tobias Mitchell wasn’t the person to give relationship advice. I mean, come on. He went off his meds and kidnapped my mother to blackmail her into being in a relationship with him.

He’s a million shades of psychotic obsession, but somehow, he was the one who made me see that I was falling in love with Stacey when I was a teenager.

“We should come back in a bit,” my sister whispers to me as our parents talk about their night. “Maybe get a coffee?”

Dad glowers at me, and I feel all the blood drain from my face. “Yeah. Good shout.”

We leave them in peace and head to the cafeteria. I take a seat at one of the tables while Luciella goes to order, returning with a large tea for her and a latte for me.

“I’m sorry about what I said earlier. About the not being my brother thing.”

I snort. “It’s fine. I haven’t exactly been around.”

“Are you… Are you really okay? You know you can talk to me.”

We were as close as siblings could be once, but when her best friend ruined me, I couldn’t bear to look at either of them. I almost told her about us so many times while drunk-calling home, almost told her that me and Stacey were sneaking around and that I was sorry.

But the apology would have been a lie.

“I have a question,” I say. I formulate a lie so I can give Barry more information. “When we were on the plane, Stacey was trying to take her hoodie off. She had a few bruises.” I sip my hot drink, ignoring the burn on my tongue. “She said they were from the studio.”

I need to know who did them. If my sister tells me she’s seeing someone, I’ll make sure the last week of his life is lived in terror. I’ll blind him, take his fingertips, shove a screwdriver in his ears and make him choke on his own cock.

Luciella frowns. “One thing we’re all jealous of is how much it takes Stacey to bruise. Are you sure they were bruises?”

“I’m certain. She has scars as well.”

My sister studies her paper cup. “I noticed the scars. She said most of them are from falling or some silly accident. I’ve not noticed bruising. We’re going out with you and Base tonight, so maybe I’ll ask her to wear a skimpy dress and see what she says.”

I stop drinking and set down my cup. “You and Stacey are coming out with us? Since when?”

“Base asked me earlier,” she replies, shrugging a shoulder. “And I said yes.”

I don’t want to go out with fucking Stacey tonight. I already have plans, and I need to complete the contract by three in the morning.

“I could straight-up ask her how she got bruised,” she says, biting into her pastry.

“Don’t put her on the spot like that.”

She arches a brow and looks at me until I feel itchy. “Why are you so concerned anyway? I thought you two couldn’t stand each other.”

“I don’t care. It was just an observation. No one likes to see another person looking beat-up.”

She hums in agreement and finishes her drink. “I’ll keep an eye on her,” she says, then her eyes widen. “Oh, the cashier said there are loads of paps outside apparently. They must’ve found out we were visiting Dad.”

“Awesome,” I say sarcastically. “Where are we going later?” I ask. I know Base has already planned it.

I’ll just make sure I leave, complete my job and get back without them noticing.

“The place across from the casino near the promenade. Begins with an M?”

I inwardly scream. This day cannot get any worse.

Of all the clubs we could go to, they pick the one whose owner I need to fucking kill?

“Your dad wants to speak to you.” Mum has appeared at the entrance of the cafeteria. She tips her head to the corridor. “Alone.”

I sigh and follow the signs back to visitation while taking deep breaths.

As soon as I walk in, Dad pins his raging gaze on me. “Sit the fuck down.”

Without flinching, I do as I’m told.

“From the beginning.” I try not to look away from the intensiveness of his gaze. “Tell me what the fuck is happening… From the very beginning, Kade.”

I shrug. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t play dumb.”

“Nothing is happening.” I shake my head, looking at him with a serious expression. “Don’t bother yourself with my life.”

Darkening eyes stare at me like I’m the villain. “Are you on drugs?”

I’m certain the whites of my eyes still have a tint of red, and I absently sniff and look at my bouncing knees beneath the table. “No.”

The way I reply means there can be no doubt it’s the biggest lie I’ve ever told him. I don’t have time for any of this.

“I’m going to ask you again. Are you on—”

I abruptly stand from the table. “I’m not fucking doing this,” I snap as I walk towards the exit.

Dad yells something at me, but I block him out and gesture to the doorman to let me out.

He knows I’m on something, which means my mum will soon know. And then my plan of staying under their radar is fucked.