15. Callie

Islid the door to my suite open and stepped out into the corridor. Thankfully, no one was there to see me leave and I pressed my back to the door as I released a long breath.

You’re meant to be here, Callie. No one will question you if you stop questioning yourself.

Ipushed off of the door and set a quick pace as I headed towards the rear of the train where they’d been loading the cargo.

I set my feet down softly, not wanting to draw the attention of any more of the Elite who may have been behind the doors I was passing. I hardly dared breathe until I made it to the end of the carriage.

Once I’d passed the suites, I crossed over into the next carriage where the lesser vampires sat around small tables on comfortable chairs. Some of them looked up curiously as I passed, but I kept my chin high and ignored them.

My heart pounded as I moved down the aisle and tension knotted in my gut. What if they could hear it? What if they realised what I truly was? I was surrounded by these beautiful monsters who hungered for my blood. I felt like a sheep creeping past a pack of sleeping wolves. They hadn’t noticed me yet, but if they did, I was done for. Gifts or not, I knew I was no match for this many enemies at once.

I kept going, fixing my gaze on the door at the end of the carriage. None of them seemed to want to question me. If they wondered what I was doing, they didn’t voice it. It seemed their fear of the Elites overruled any curiosity they may have felt, and I made it past them almost too easily.

My hand trembled as I reached for the door handle at the end of the carriage and I stepped through quickly, pressing it shut again with a sigh of relief.

The next carriage was cooler than the others and no lights illuminated it. I squinted into the space as my eyes adjusted and I spotted long rows of the wooden cargo boxes.

I began moving between them, trying to spot the scratch I’d carved into the box where Magnar was hiding. As I walked, Fury tingled against my thigh and I reached beneath my coat to grab it, the warm hilt humming in excitement.

Old friends this way.

The blade urged me on, and I upped my pace as I let it guide me towards Tempest and Venom.

I moved into yet another carriage, passing more crates than I could count and feeling immensely grateful to Fury for saving me the effort of having to check them all.

As I neared the end of the long room, the blade sighed a greeting through my mind, and I stopped. A deep scratch was carved into the box on my right, and I knocked on it lightly.

“It’s me,” I called as I grabbed the edge of the crate and tried to haul it out of its position in the line. I grunted with effort, the huge box slipping forward reluctantly as I struggled with its weight despite the newly gained strength in my muscles.

I finally got the box clear of the shelf above it and forced the lid open with a grunt of effort.

“Took you long enough,” Magnar grumbled as he sat up, rotating his shoulders.

“I would have been faster if you weren’t so damn heavy,” I replied lightly.

“Did everything go to plan?” he asked, ignoring my comment as he clambered out of the crate.

“Pretty much,” I hedged, not really wanting to explain about the Elite who had wanted to fuck me.

“Tell me.”

His command fell over me like a punch to the gut and my mouth opened, spilling the whole story to him whether I liked it or not.

“There was an incident with an Elite,” my voice was flat and emotionless, but anger flared in my chest as he used his power over me once more. Since the incident with the bath, I’d been trying to convince myself that he hadn’t really been able to force my body to bow to his control like this, but those hopes were dashed entirely as I was coerced into a truthful response. “He followed me into my room under the pretence of checking up on who had sent me here. Once he had me alone, he made it clear he had other intentions and he propositioned me. He persisted despite my refusal and tore my dress in his attempt to convince me. When he touched me, he could feel the heat of my skin and-”

“What?” Magnar bellowed, and my heart flipped over as I looked back towards the other carriages, praying that none of the vampires had heard him.

He grabbed me, shaking me slightly as his eyes raked over me, and I felt a touch of fear at the fire burning in his gaze.

“What did he do to you?” he demanded.

“Nothing,” I snapped, pushing him back, though it didn’t really do anything to help. “I killed him, alright? Stabbed him in the heart and covered it up so no one will notice. It’s done.”

The tension fell out of Magnar’s grip, and he scowled at the narrow corridor which led between the crates as if searching for the source of his rage there.

“Good,” he grunted, though it didn’t seem like he was all that pleased about it.

“What’s your problem?” I demanded, and he turned to me, looking like he might bite back, but then he grabbed me, yanking me against his chest and holding me tightly against him.

“You’re mine to protect,” he growled, his mouth brushing against my temple. “I won’t let those monsters have you.”

Anger, grief, pain, and torment tangled in me while I stood there in his arms, breathing in the leather and oak scent of him, unable to return his embrace. My arms felt like they were weighted with lead as Idun’s laws refused to allow it, holding us apart even in something as simple as this.

He was all I had in this place, and I was all he had too. The bonds between us muddied that, complicating it and leaving it darkened with bitterness and resentment on both sides, but at the truth of us now, we were all we had.

Magnar growled a curse then released me abruptly, stepping away. With a frown, I realised that he’d just fought off Idun’s control so he could hold me close for that single moment. I had no idea how he’d managed to do it. I couldn’t move an inch beyond the boundaries she’d set, and yet he’d just punched right through them as if they didn’t even exist for him.

“You won’t be alone with them again,” he said firmly, his voice dark.

“It’s fine, I dealt with it. I just hope no one realises the bastard is missing before we’ve done what we came to do.” I stepped away from him and pulled open the crate he’d used to hide our supplies.

The silence grew between us, and I knew he was holding back on something he wanted to say, but I wasn’t going to force his lips to loosen.

I grabbed my pack from the crate and located some clean clothes within it. I didn’t have anything else that looked right for an Elite, but I had a pair of black leggings and a black long-sleeved shirt which clung to my figure and hopefully wouldn’t draw much attention anyway.

I shrugged out of my coat and hung it over the crate, turning my back on Magnar so I could at least imagine I had some privacy.

“Where is your dress?” Magnar asked, his voice dangerously low.

I glanced over my shoulder at him as I pulled the clothes on.

“I told you it was torn,” I replied dismissively.

I didn’t want to keep thinking about how close I’d come to being discovered. Or of the look in the Elite’s eyes when he’d refused to take no for an answer.

“Just tell-”

“Are you going to force it out of me again?” I snapped before he could finish the sentence, squaring up to him despite being more than a foot shorter and currently wearing nothing but my bra and panties. “Don’t you trust me enough to allow me to choose what I say now? Have I lost the freedom to speak my mind as well as the freedom over my actions?”

Magnar glared at me, and I glared right back. Tension crackled between us, and I couldn’t tell which one of us would break it first. I could see the war going on behind his golden eyes as he tried to decide how badly he needed to hear every detail of what had happened to me. And whether it was worth the damage he’d do to my trust in him if he made me speak it.

He finally let out a huff of irritation and turned away from me dismissively. He was clearly unhappy about it, but he didn’t force my tongue, and my chest swelled with the small victory.

“I’m fine,” I muttered as I turned back to my clothes and continued with the task of dressing. “And the motherfucker is dead. The rest doesn’t matter.”

Magnar made a noise which could have indicated he understood, then turned his attention to the crate containing our things.

I put the coat back on and tugged my hair out from under the collar. Magnar took Tempest from the crate but left the rest of our supplies where they were, then he slid the two crates back into position, concealing the evidence of him stowing away.

“We need to hurry up and find the blood. I don’t have unlimited time with this disguise, and we might need it to get past the vampires,” I said.

“Come then.” Magnar started to lead the way, but I caught his arm and slipped past him.

“I should go first,” I reminded him. “I won’t raise any suspicions. You, on the other hand, stand out like a bear at a tea party.”

“What?” He frowned at me in confusion, and I rolled my eyes.

“Never mind. Let’s just get on with what we came here for.”

The next carriage held more crates of supplies, and we passed through it quickly. When we reached the following door, I eased it open and cold air washed over me.

My breath rose before me as I stepped inside, and Fury sang with victory at my hip like it already knew we were in the right place.

“This is it,” I whispered.

Magnar pressed the door closed behind me and I frowned at the dark space ahead. I found a switch beside the door and flipped it on. The carriage was illuminated with pale blue light, and I gasped as I spotted four huge, glass vats filled with dark red liquid.

Curling letters were etched into the glass on each of the vats, and I ran my fingers over them as I passed through the carriage. I, H, F...G. I stopped beside the vat labelled with my old Realm’s letter. Was my blood in there?

Rage and disgust flowed through me in equal measures.

I reached out and pressed my hand to the cool glass. How much blood was inside it? How many vampires would it feed? How long would this sustain them for?

I turned back towards Magnar and found him leaning over vat H as he unbolted a hatch on the top of it. Once he’d opened it, he pulled the apple Idun had given him from his pocket and cut a slice from it with his blade before dropping it inside.

As the fruit sank into the blood, it began to dissolve. Tiny bubbles spread throughout the liquid, rushing towards the glass and bursting against it. My pulse hammered as I watched the poison slipping through the blood and spiking it as simply as that.

Once the bubbles had all fizzled away, the blood fell deathly still. There was no sign of the apple or its effects.

“Holy shit, do you really think this will work?” I breathed, biting my lip as I stared into the deadly concoction.

“Idun’s power is boundless,” Magnar murmured. “Every vampire who drinks from this will perish.”

A dark smile captured my lips as I watched him silently repeating the process with the other vats and my heart swelled with hope. We were finally striking at them in a way which would really hurt. This could kill hundreds if not thousands of the bloodsuckers. It felt like striking the first blow in a war they didn’t even know they were fighting yet. But it was time that humanity fought back. And I was proud to be spearheading the assault.

Hide! Fury hissed urgently, and I flinched in surprise at the blade’s voice inside my mind.

The faint sound of voices reached us, and my pulse leapt in panic.

I ran to switch the light back off and Magnar’s hand landed on my elbow as he wrenched me further into the room.

I stumbled as he tugged me along and shoved me into a small gap between two of the vats. He had to turn sideways and force his muscular body through the space to follow me, and he barely made it into the darkened spot before the door opened and the lights flickered on again.

I was crushed against him in the tiny space behind the vats and I hardly dared to breathe as the vampires stepped into the carriage.

“Well, what do we have here then?” a male voice cooed.

Adrenaline crashed through my limbs, and I widened my eyes at Magnar as panic gripped me. How had they known we were here? It didn’t make sense. I’d been sure none of them had followed me-

“Isn’t it beautiful?” another, deeper voice replied. “I wish we could sneak a taste, but the volume has been logged. They’ll know if we touch even a drop of it. This blood is destined for the royal wedding; they don’t want it sampled until after the celebrations.”

“So you just brought me here to tempt me?” the first voice asked.

The second vampire laughed. “I remember what it was like working my first blood delivery. It drives you mad knowing it’s so close but not seeing it. So now you have.”

“Thanks. Though now I’ll be driven mad having seen it and not having taken a taste. I guess I’ll have something to dream about the next time I sleep.”

“Imagine swimming in one of those vats. I think I’d just die all over again from the pure ecstasy it induced.”

The vampires laughed before switching the lights back off and heading out of the carriage again.

I released a shaky breath and Magnar eased back out of our concealed spot. I followed him and we waited in tense silence for several long minutes. When Fury’s hilt cooled in my palm, we headed back through the door and kept moving until we reached the cargo crates where our things were hidden.

Magnar pulled the crate out of the line and removed our packs from it before pointing me into the space behind it.

There was just enough room behind the rows of shelves for me to crawl in and lean against the wall out of sight. He followed me before pulling the crate back into place behind us.

Magnar shifted into the corner, getting as comfortable as possible in the confined space. I sat beside him, curling my legs in front of me with a smile tugging at my lips. We’d just poisoned the vampires’ blood supply and now this train was a weapon heading straight for the heart of their nest.

Dad would be so fucking proud of this.

My smile slipped, then fell away, grief taking bites out of me once more, and I curled my hands into tight fists, trying to focus on the feeling of my fingernails digging into my palms, forcing out that pain with all I could.

“Don’t do that,” Magnar murmured softly.

I glanced at him, releasing a breath as I forced back the tears that were burning the backs of my eyes.

“Do what?”

“Your father sacrificed himself to save you. He died so that you might live. And he did die, drakaina hjarta. It hurts. It burrows so deep inside of you that you won’t ever be the person you were before knowing the pain of his passage, and that’s how it should be. His love for you and yours for him should leave a mark so deep that you never truly part from him. Denying your pain over his loss won’t lessen it. You shouldn’t fight it.”

“If I let myself feel it, I’ll drown in it,” I breathed.

Though there were no vampires in this part of the train, I didn’t want to risk alerting any of them to our presence. We’d come this far, all we had to do now was make it off the train without being seen. I wasn’t sure how we’d manage such a thing but that was a problem for tomorrow.

“You won’t. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. More importantly than that, you need to feel the pain of his loss so that you might be able to enjoy the memories of his life again. If you forever let that agony overwhelm you, you’ll lose the chance to remember him with the love and joy he gave you.”

I swallowed thickly, pressing my lips into a thin line as I tried to do as he’d said, tried to allow some of that pain to trickle past my defences, tried to let it claim me.

“My father tied my right arm to my side and made me use only my left for an entire year,” Magnar said softly, his voice barely carrying over the low rumble of the train.

“Even when you slept?” I asked, giving him the side eye.

Magnar snorted, shaking his head. “Your mind is so literal sometimes. No, Callie Ford, he did not tie me up for an entire year; only while I was learning to wield a sword so that I might train my left arm to be as efficient as my right.”

“Why? Surely using your dominant arm makes more sense,” I muttered, a tear slipping down my cheek which I allowed to fall without interference.

“Because he never wanted me to be on the back foot. Never wanted me to rely too much on any one thing. If my body was to be a weapon, then every piece of me would be expected to perform with the brutal efficiency required to keep me alive. Once my left arm was strong enough, I began training with my right in kind.”

I pursed my lips, trying to imagine what it had been like to grow up as he had, to have been trained for this for my entire life instead of stumbling into it through grief and a desperate need for vengeance.

“Dad used to take me out into the ruins at the edge of the Realm,” I said softly, fighting through the pain of those memories and letting him have a taste of them in return for his own. “He knew I craved freedom more than anything, that I hated being little more than a bird trapped in a cage. He couldn’t offer me an escape from the Realm, but he offered me an escape from the bars it built around my mind. He taught me to climb the ruined buildings, to leap between broken rooftops and how to roll when I fell so I didn’t break bones. Just me and him. A taste of freedom laced in adrenaline, which loosened the crushing feeling on my chest.”

The tears ran freely now, but I forced myself to let them, to feel the gaping place in my heart which should have held him close for so much longer, the aching, endless grief. He would have chosen this path for me if he’d been able to, would have wanted me free and able to fight back against the monsters who sought to cage me again.

The aching emptiness in my chest was overwhelming, the chasm of space in the inch which divided me from Magnar seeming as endless as the miles which divided me from Montana. This loneliness was hungry, devouring, taking bites out of me piece by piece and leaving nothing but my raw bones exposed in its wake. The loss of my father was too much to bear, the reality before me too enormous to conquer, and the laws of this vow that bound me felt all too much like a cage of their own.

I needed something to steal away the ache in my chest, a distraction to pull me from the darkness of my own reality.

I shifted against the wall of the train, pushing my spine against the cold metal, digging my heels into the floor to anchor myself as I looked to my right through the tears blurring my eyes.

Magnar looked back at me, a pit of pain swirling within his golden gaze too. He knew this emptiness, knew this torment.

The breath of space dividing us felt like a ravine that couldn’t be breached, but I shifted my hand closer to his all the same. The urge to move away again battered against me as the laws of the vow tightened around me, but I fought it, ignoring the ache in my muscles as my hand slowly slid closer.

My fingertips brushed against his for the briefest moment, and he looked at me in surprise, his own fingers curling around mine, the heat between us pulsing through that small point of contact.

“What now, drakaina hjarta?” Magnar growled, a challenge in his words, that anger returning too.

“You mean if I wasn’t bound by the magic of some goddess I only just found out exists?” I asked. “Then I’d likely use your body to make me forget my pain for a little while.”

His fingers flexed around mine, my core heating at the tightness of his grip even as the power of the goddess grew, my hand trembling with the effort it took to resist her demand to release him.

I gritted my teeth, resentment building in me as I fought against her will, hating the control she had over me with every piece of my being. Even my freedom wasn’t my own anymore. The bars which trapped me only ever shifting, never truly shattering.

Idun’s power hit me with more force, and I snatched my hand back, sagging against the wall with a curse while Magnar grunted in irritation.

“Let’s assume you’ll be fucking your own hand for release instead then,” he muttered, his gaze moving from me, the bite in his voice slicing at my flesh.

“I didn’t ask for this you know,” I snapped.

“You did, actually.”

“I wanted to become a weapon fit for killing bloodsuckers, not a slave to the power of a deity set on using me for her own gain.”

“And yet you sit there resting instead of honing your knife skills with this time you’ve been offered.”

“You want me to train with you here? In this tiny space while we hide from a hundred vampires in the dark?” I scoffed.

“What’s wrong, drakaina hjarta? Is that too difficult for you? Fury is small enough to wield in close quarters, and you should be able to get yourself out of a tight spot like this if you found yourself trapped in one. Vampires will always want to come at you. The closer the better. All the easier to get their teeth into you after all.”

I hesitated for a beat, the unnatural swaying of the train and low hum of its engines all that surrounded us. It would be madness to do what he was suggesting. But I wasn’t the type to back down from a challenge.

I shook my head as if denying him, my fingers wrapping around Fury’s hilt where he couldn’t see them in the dim light.

Magnar clucked his tongue at me, and I struck like a cobra, snatching my blade from its sheath and swinging it toward his throat.

Of course I didn’t catch him off guard though. His hand clamped around my wrist, tugging me closer and taking control of my momentum until I was straddling him, my blade twisted to press against my own throat while still in my grip.

“You’re smaller than me, so you need to be faster,” he snarled, my pulse skipping at the sudden turn of my strike.

Magnar released me and I drew back, eyeing him for a moment and calling on the memories of my ancestors.

I swung Fury for his chest this time, following it with a left hook aimed straight at his jaw.

He blocked both, his forearm crashing against mine with enough force to make my wrist go numb, and I cursed him as I tried again, aiming to headbutt him while stabbing for his thigh.

Magnar laughed as he was forced to jerk aside, one hand batting Fury away, the other gripping my knee and drawing me further onto his lap.

I gasped as something hard pressed against my core, my gaze falling to the dagger he had somehow drawn and now had pressed between my legs, the blade flush with my inner thigh.

“Femoral artery,” he said with a taunting smile. “One good slice and you’re dead.”

My lips parted on some kind of reply, but he shifted his hand, his knuckles raking over my core and stealing my breath as need rolled through every piece of me.

I moaned, biting down on my lower lip as I shifted my hips against his hand, my eyes on his as they darkened.

Magnar’s grip on my wrist loosened, and I twisted it sharply, lunging for him and pressing Fury to his throat before he could stop me.

“Jugular,” I breathed in his ear. “Now you’re dead too.”

“I can think of worse ways to go. Besides, you’ve made a mistake.”

“How so?”

“I’m meant to be a vampire, so you should have gone for the heart. Cutting my throat won’t do the job – and now you’ve gone and left yourself exposed.”

“Exposed to what?” I said in disbelief. I was straddling him in the darkness, my blade to his throat, and he still wanted to claim the win from me. “I call bullshit.”

Magnar’s hand was suddenly in my hair, fisting tight and yanking hard.

I gasped as my head was drawn back, my grip on Fury slackening and Magnar rearing up beneath me, knocking it from my hold altogether.

His teeth sank into the flesh of my neck before I could I do a single thing, a noise escaping me far too loudly as I found myself at his mercy once more.

“Fuck,” I gasped as he growled against my skin, the noise a sin which resounded through my flesh.

“Dead,” he repeated, his other hand still between my thighs, his grip on the knife there shifting so that his knuckles rode over my clit. That was no fucking accident, and the sound which spilled from my lips let him know exactly what I thought of it too.

“Now what?” I gasped, his grip on me tightening, his arm banding around me. He pulled my hair harder, locking me at his mercy and making my spine arch against his hold.

“Now let’s see if you can get free, novice,” he taunted, his mouth still against my neck, the rake of his stubble punctuating his words, setting my skin on fire.

“I can’t,” I hissed.

“Try struggling,” he suggested.

My heart thundered at the suggestion, his grip on me utterly unyielding, the chances of me breaking loose little to none. My hands were free, but I was crushed against his chest, his mouth at my neck; his blade between my legs and his fist in my hair kept my spine arched in a way that prevented almost all movement.

I gripped his forearm, digging my nails into the inked skin as I tried to push against him, his body as immovable as stone.

I lifted my hips, and his knuckles rode straight over my clit again, dragging against the seam of my pants, making my nipples harden and ache.

“That’s it, drakaina hjarta,” Magnar growled. “Try a little harder next time though, or you’ll never break free.”

I cursed him, realising his game, seeing how he’d turned this to his advantage and yet finding I didn’t care about that at all. He had me at his mercy, and the only freedom he would allow me was this.

But if he thought he was winning by taunting my body with what it couldn’t have, then he was so fucking mistaken.

“You’re awfully chatty for a vampire set on sucking me dry,” I hissed, my nails digging into his skin even harder as I pushed at him.

Magnar chuckled against my neck, laughing like he thought he’d won something here. “Do you yield, or do you think you might stand a chance at winning still?”

“I can still win,” I snarled, wanting to prove a fucking point here if nothing else.

“If you say so.” Magnar bit me again before I could reply, and I cursed.

My nails bit into his arms hard enough to draw blood, and I struggled against his grip on me, my hips flexing, grinding my core against his knuckles, the hilt of his knife. The friction set my entire body alight, and I bit down on a moan.

Idun’s power hummed in the air surrounding us, the need in my flesh building to the point of excruciating, release dancing just out of reach.

Magnar’s hold on me tightened and my chest pressed to his, my aching nipples finding the barest hint of relief between the layers of fabric that parted us. I needed this. I needed more. I was so fucking close, my pulse rioting out of rhythm, and if I could just-

My back hit the cold wall of the train and I blinked like a bucket of ice water had just been tossed over the two of us, a power beyond measure pressing me back from him.

“Fuck,” Magnar muttered, his fingers raking across the stubble on his jaw while he looked at me like I was something he was just aching to devour.

I cursed beneath my breath and tore my gaze from the torture of his, shaking my head like that might clear it.

Considering she was supposed to be helping us, that goddess really was a meddling bitch.

“You should sleep,” Magnar grunted, and I appreciated the fact he hadn’t commanded me to do so even though he clearly could.

It had been a long day and my body was crying out for rest. When we made it to New York we’d have so much to do that we couldn’t guarantee the next time we’d get to sleep. This might be the best chance we had, and it was clear Idun wasn’t going to allow us to pass the time with anything more interesting either.

“So should you,” I pointed out.

“I’ll keep watch.”

“Mmmhmm.” There was no point in trying to argue with him.

If he didn’t want to sleep, then that was his business, but I, on the other hand, was going to take as much rest as I could get while working to banish the thundering need from my body. Magnar Elioson might have been a son of a bitch, but I couldn’t deny how goddamn hot he was too. Not that I was going to be making use of that fact again apparently.

My eyes fell shut and sleep came for me like a tide, the hours I’d missed rushing up on me and offering me this small escape. I gratefully fell into its embrace and let my problems fester in the back of my mind while seeking silence in the dark.