Chapter 7

Declan was up early Saturday morning. Not only was he determined to get Sadie's room done before she got back home, but he also knew Gavin would be there soon to work on the mural. He hoped it would be an awesome surprise for Sadie and Renee. He started a pot of coffee, surprised Renee wasn't already up and working. It seemed like she was always working.

He took his cup and went to Sadie's room to paint the base coat on the mural wall. With any luck, it would be dry by the time Gavin was ready to start. Once he got the bright blue paint on that wall, he went to refill his cup and see if Renee was awake. He didn't want to turn on the radio if she was sleeping in, but the silence was killing him.

She was sitting at the dining room table tapping away on her computer. She practically jumped when he walked by. "What are you doing up?"

"Painting. I told you I'd get Sadie's room done."

"Yeah, but it's really early."

"I know, lazy. I've already had a cup of coffee." He waved his mug at her. "How'd you think the coffee appeared?"

She shook her head. "I honestly didn't give it any thought. Weird. But thanks." She took a sip from her cup. "You need some help painting?"

"Nope. I got it. My brother Gavin is on his way to help."

"You don't need to recruit your family. I'm here and can help. It's not like painting takes some special skill."

He whistled as he poured his coffee. "Better not let Gavin hear you say that. As an artist, he might take offense."

"You know what I mean. Obviously, an artist has skills. Rolling paint on a wall is something anyone can do."

"Well, we got it covered either way. Continue with your boring numbers."

He hoped his nonchalant attitude wouldn't raise any flags. It would be hard to surprise her with a mural if she was in the room. On his way back to the bedroom, the doorbell rang, so he went to answer it. "It should be Gavin," he called, hoping to keep Renee where she was.

He swung the door open and said quietly, "Sadie's at her dad's but Renee is here, so don't mention the mural."

"Got it." Gavin handed Declan a bag of supplies.

Gavin paused and took a few steps toward the dining room. "Hey," he said. "I'm Gavin."

She turned and stood. "Nice to meet you. I'm Renee. I told Declan I'd help him paint, but he insisted he do it on his own." She shot Declan a look. "Thanks for helping him."

"No problem. I like painting."

"Declan mentioned you're an artist. Is paint your medium?"

"Sometimes."

"Come on," Declan said.

Gavin offered a little wave. "Just wanted to introduce myself."

"See you later."

Declan took the supplies to the bedroom and then stuck his head back out the door. "Hey, is the radio going to bother you?"

"Only if you put on crap," she yelled back.

He smiled and closed the door. Gavin was already sketching with a pencil on the wall. In addition to the pictures of Super Sadie Declan also sent a couple of Sadie, so Gavin would know what to work toward. His brother already had pages sketched out and worked to copy them to the wall. Although the lines showed a human shape, he had no idea how Gavin would make it look like Sadie.

It took a lot of concentration to not watch Gavin and paint the other walls instead. Watching his brother create a piece of art was fascinating. He turned on the music but kept it to a normal level. "Music okay with you?" he asked.

Gavin nodded without turning around. "It's fine."

They worked in silence for a bit. Then Gavin asked, "So how are you really doing?"

"Fine."

"I don't need the bullshit answer you give Brendan and Ronan. You don't have a job and you're homeless."

Hearing that stung. "I've been that way on and off for years. It's nothing new. And I have a place to live. This is a good gig. I work on Renee's house, and I live for free."

"But it's not long-term." He suddenly turned around. "Unless...You and Renee?"

"Nah. It's not like that. We're friends."

"You're not the kind of guy who's just friends with anyone that hot."

"Don't know what to tell you. We are." He shrugged. But Gavin was right. He'd never been friends with a woman who he also wasn't sleeping with, at least occasionally.

"What I was getting at, though, was how you're doing with all the shit about Dad."

"What's there to do? He's dead."

Gavin leaned against the plastic-covered dresser. "But you'd thought he ran off."

"I was wrong. Or so Cahill says anyway."

"You don't believe him?"

"I believe him, but I get where Ronan is coming from. For Alan Cahill to make some dying declaration to let us know Dad is dead but not give us any information about what happened or where his body is...it's shitty."

"He and Brendan are working to find the answers, but having those answers won't change how you feel, will it?"

Declan set the roller down. "No. I'm pissed off. Getting answers won't change that, but there's nothing I can do about it. I spent most of my life thinking Dad didn't want us. That he ditched us to have freedom. So be it. But now..."

Gavin nodded. "Your whole worldview has shifted."

Declan didn't respond. Gavin often said things that made little sense to him. But this time, something rang true.

"You've been running for more than a decade, little brother. We all see it."

"I'm just like him. Is that what you're saying?"

"Not like him. He didn't leave, remember?"

"I thought he did. So, what? I've been trying to be like him?"

Gavin shook his head. "No. More like an effort to not be like him. No way to let anyone down if you don't let them in."

Damn. He knew Gavin was right. He'd never voiced the decision to remain free, but he guessed he wasn't as complex a person as he'd thought. He turned to roll the next section of wall. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gavin pick up his pencils.

"You obviously don't want to talk about it, so I'll drop it," he started, "but what now? Now that you know he didn't run, that your view of a man, husband, and father is different than you'd imagined, how do you picture your life?"

I don't have a fucking clue. He couldn't say it out loud. It made him feel even more like a loser. But it was the reason he'd decided to move in here, so he could figure his shit out. Having his brother point out all of his flaws wasn't helping.

By the time lunch hit, Renee was feeling pretty good. The music Declan played was loud enough to be background sound for her, but quiet enough that she wasn't distracted. She's managed to wrap up all of her work so tomorrow, she could have a full day off. In celebration, she popped open a beer and knocked on the bedroom door to see if Declan and Gavin wanted lunch.

The door opened a couple of inches, and Declan peeked out.

"Would you guys like a sandwich? Maybe some beer?"

"Sounds good."

"Why are you acting so weird? Open the door."

"Nope." He shifted, gripping the door tighter as if she'd try to push her way in. "It's a surprise."

"So help me God, Declan, if I come in there and you've painted polka dots or crazy stripes all over, I'm gonna kill you."

He gave her a broad smile, his eyes light with excitement. "It's a good surprise. Trust me."

"I don't."

Without releasing the door, he put a hand to his chest. "Hurtful, Rennie."

Then he slammed the door in her face.

"What kind of sandwiches?"

"Whatever you got is good with us," he answered from behind the closed door.

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches, all the way reminding herself, as Declan had, that it was just paint. It was no big deal, no matter how hideous he might've made it.

After making lunch for both guys and herself, she set everything on the dining room table and called for Declan.

She knew when he opened the door because the music got louder. A few moments later they joined her.

"Is it safe for me to leave the door open or are you going to try to peek?" Declan asked.

"I'm not a child. While I don't like surprises, I can wait." She pointed at the sandwiches.

Gavin sat and said, "Thanks."

They each popped open their beers. "Is there anything I can do to help in Sadie's room? My work for the day is done, so I've got the rest of today and tomorrow to accomplish something on the house."

"Being sneaky by offering help isn't getting you in Sadie's room faster."

"I'm not being sneaky. I'm offering to work."

He looked around the dining room. "You can pick up where I stopped in here getting the wallpaper off."

She forced a smile. "Sounds tedious, but I'll be thrilled once this room is painted instead."

"When we're done eating, I'll show you what to do."

She studied Gavin. Seeing the two of them together, she could tell they were brothers, but if she'd seen Gavin on the street, she wouldn't have picked him out to be a Doyle. His face was a little rounder than Declan's. He was built similarly, and he had a full beard instead of Declan's trim scruffy one. But the eyes proved they were family. She wasn't sure what it was. The color? Sure. But it was like there was always a hint of amusement in them.

"So how did Declan rope you into helping him with my daughter's bedroom?"

"He asked. I wasn't busy. And I'm a better painter than he is."

Declan shoved his brother's arm. "I'm painting way faster than you are."

"Speed isn't everything."

"Whatever."

The rest of their short lunch was spent chatting and joking about inconsequential things. Renee had forgotten how much fun it was to have other people around to talk to. She spent so much time alone, it was easy to slip into a solitary lifestyle—not including her daughter, of course. But real adult conversation? With swearing and inappropriate jokes? Hardly ever happened in her life these days. By the time they finished eating, her face hurt from smiling so much.

Gavin disappeared into the bedroom, but Declan stayed behind to give her a tutorial on removing wallpaper.

She clapped her hands. "Okay. Let's do this."

"It's tedious but not difficult. Spray the solution on. Use a generous amount. Let it soak in for a bit. Then use this scrubber to score marks into the paper. It doesn't look like much but the edges are sharp. Then use the flat edge here to scrape away."

He demonstrated all the steps on a small section of the wall.

"Seems simple enough. Thanks for the explanation." She took the supplies from him. "And you can leave the door open so I can hear the music, too. I promise to announce myself if I get close to the room."

"Okay." He stepped away and then added, "It looks good on you."

"What?"

"The smile. You don't do that too much, and you should."

"Thanks, I guess."

"I'm going to finish painting. Yell if you need anything."

Renee focused on spraying and scrubbing and scraping. She'd watched Declan take off huge chunks of paper when he was doing it earlier in the week, but she had a miserable pile of beige scraps. She wondered if the paper had originally been beige or if it was just age. The texture was weird, and she was happy to see it go. If only it'd go faster. She tried using more solution, then less. Then more but leaving it on longer. It seemed like if she could just get the right combination, she could peel away a sheet of paper.

When the doorbell rang, it caught her off guard. She wasn't expecting anyone. She picked up her beer and drank as she headed through the living room. She opened the door to find Sadie and Graham standing there.

"Mommy!" Sadie threw her arms wide and crashed into her.

Renee automatically returned the embrace with her free hand. She shot Graham a look. "Sweetie, go into the kitchen, please. Declan is working on your room and I don't want you in there yet."

"Can I have a cookie?"

"Did you eat lunch?"

"Yeah."

"Fine." Once Sadie ran through the house, she turned on Graham. "What the hell are you doing here? You're supposed to have her until tomorrow after dinner."

"I know. But she said she missed you and wanted to come home."

"So what? Be a fucking parent, Graham."

"What? Are you saying you don't want our daughter to be at home? You're too busy drinking on a Saturday afternoon to care for her?"

"First, it's my Saturday. Second, I always—and we both know I mean always—take care of my daughter. This is bullshit."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do with her. She was bored at my place and said she wanted to be with you." He paused and ran a hand over his light brown hair. "And I know this isn't the best timing, but I can't take her next weekend."

"What?"

"I can't take her."

"Why the hell not? You agreed to switch weekends with me because it's Mariah's wedding. I won't be here."

"I figured you could ask your mom or Tyler to babysit."

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? I hardly ever ask you to take my weekend and I do it for you all the time." She flung an arm out behind her. "Case in point."

"Don't be a bitch, Renee. You know I don't have family to step in to help."

She held up a hand to stop the conversation before she totally lost her shit. "You know what? Whatever. But plan to have her for your regular weekend—for the whole weekend."

"Thanks."

She couldn't even muster a response. She just closed the door in his face. Some days she had a hard time remembering what she ever saw in him. After taking a deep breath and draining her beer, she turned to the kitchen.

Sadie sat at the table munching a cookie. "I told Daddy you were gonna be mad."

"I'm not mad."

"Yeah, you are." She furrowed her brow and said, "You look like this."

Renee knew Sadie's expression was spot on, so she forced her face to smooth out. "Well, I'm not mad at you. Why did you tell Daddy you wanted to come home?"

Sadie's mouth slipped open, but she said nothing for a minute. "I said I was excited to come home because Declan promised to paint my room. I wanted to help."

Renee crossed her arms. "So you didn't tell Daddy you were bored and wanted to be with me?"

"Weeeelll, his house is boring, but I didn't say it cuz you said it's not nice to say stuff like that. But I didn't say I wanted to be with you. I don't think."

"Okay, baby."

"Is my room done? I wanna see."

"Declan is still working on it and I don't think he's going to let us in. He said it's a surprise."

That word acted like a fire under her kid. "In coming!" Renee yelled as she chased Sadie down the hall to her room. Sadie stopped to pound on the door.

As he did before, Declan opened it a crack. His eyes widened to see Sadie standing there. "Sadie, my lady, what are you doing here?"

"I wanna see my room! Mom said it's a surprise."

"It is. Right now, no girls allowed."

The look of utter shock on her daughter's face made Renee laugh.

"But it's my room and I'm a girl."

"You and your mom can come in when we're done."

"Come on, Sadie. We don't need those stinky boys to have fun. Let's go put your stuff in my room because I think you're gonna have to sleep in there tonight. And then we'll bake some cupcakes."

"Yay! With blue frosting?"

"Maybe."

Sadie ran off again to grab her overnight bag.

Declan was still standing in the doorway. "I thought she was at Graham's until tomorrow."

"Yeah, she was supposed to be. Welcome to my world." She crossed her arms. "I really don't want to talk about Graham right now. Or maybe ever."

"Save us some blue cupcakes," he said with a smile.

"Only if you're lucky."

Once again, he closed the door on her, this time laughing as he did. Renee went to the kitchen to wait for Sadie and texted her mom to see if she could watch Sadie for Mariah's wedding. Graham had always been unreliable, but this one took the cake. He knew she was in the bridal party. It wasn't just any social engagement for her.

She'd tried hard to preserve any relationship Sadie would have with him, but he was making it difficult.

As Sadie bounced into the room, Renee tucked away all those thoughts and focused on enjoying the time with her daughter.