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33.

Alex

S omething is different when Ryan walks out of the elevator.

"My office," he barks. "Now."

Instantly, I'm on my feet and scurrying to his space. I don't know what this could be about, but my first instinct is that I hope I'm not about to get fired. My second is that I hope he's not about to do something crazy.

When we're in his office, though, he closes the door and locks it.

"Is everything okay?"

"No."

"No? Is something wrong? I cancelled your morning meetings when you didn't answer. I figured you were sick or needed some time," I start to say, but he's stalking across the room, and then he's reaching for me, and then he's kissing me like nothing else in the world matters but this moment.

"I need you," he groans.

I push him away, shaking my head.

"Ryan, what the hell? You didn't call me all weekend. You didn't text me back." I stare at the surprised look on his face. This is the moment when I realize that he actually seems surprised that this lack of contact bothers me. "Do you not know that's weird?"

"I'm sorry," he says. "I needed some space."

"Then you have to tell me," I say. "I mean, I get that this is just a little fling, but communication matters, you know? I didn't know if you ghosting me meant we were off romantically, or if you were dead, or if you just got bored. I had no idea because you said nothing at all. Hell, I even thought I might have gotten fired and nobody bothered to tell me."

"Alex," he reaches for me, tugging me close once more. "I am so sorry."

"Why don't you know these things?" I ask. "These are basic things, Ryan."

"Because my parents split up when I was young, and then I went to boarding school," he says. "Every relationship I've ever had has been completely dysfunctional."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that anytime things get hard, we actually do break up," he says.

"Seriously?"

He nods. "I've never been with anyone for as long as you and I have been together."

"Which is strange because I don't even think we're really together. I think this is a fling," I tell him. I've been trying to come to terms with it because I really do like him. I like him more than I should, and I definitely like him more than is good for me. Ryan is the type of man who's going to tear my fucking heart out and I'll just be left with this big, gaping hole.

"It's more than a fling," he says.

"Why do I believe you? I shouldn't."

Instead of answering, he kisses me again, and this time, I don't resist. This time, I kiss him back like my heart depends on it because this time, it does.

His hands slide down my back and up to my shoulders before he glides them to my front. He cups my breasts over my blouse as he kisses me more deeply than any reasonable person should.

I want this.

I crave this.

My body is on fire as he starts to undress me. Somehow, even though we've been sneaking around at work for ages, this never gets old. I love the way he isn't afraid to go wild with me. He's uninhibited, and he makes me want to be that way, too.

"Kiss me more," he says, and I reach for his next, tugging him closer to myself. A moment later I'm naked, and then he's naked, and then I'm sitting on the edge of his desk while he kneels before me.

He starts by kissing up one thigh and down the other.

"Don't fucking tease me," I say.

I'm wet.

I want his mouth on me, and then I want his dick inside of me. He knows this. This isn't some simple hookup any longer. He's right. We know each other very well at this point. Honestly, I know him better than I should. I crave him more than I ought to.

When he finally presses his lips against my core, I throw my head back. My eyes close on their own. I just want to focus on the sensations he's offering me. I completely lose myself in the moment as he devours me the way he'd eat an ice cream sundae.

"So perfect," he murmurs, and the craziest part is that I believe him.

"Perfect" is not a word anyone has ever used to describe me, but when I'm with Ryan, that no longer matters. Alone in his office, the two of us manage to find ourselves in a strange sort of connection where the outside world can just fuck off for a little while because we need each other.

We need this.

When I come, it's like my entire world shatters and breaks. It's like I'm being torn apart and then shoved back together but in a better way. Relief washes over me as I melt down against his desk, lying on it.

"No," he laughs, shaking his head. "We're not done."

But I'm completely exhausted.

"Come," he says, taking my hand. He pulls me so I'm sitting again, and I reach for his cock. He's naked, too, and I start to stroke him. Then, to my disappointment, he takes a step back.

"Oh, that would be too easy," he says.

"What?"

"Crawl to me," he says.

And I lower myself to the floor. I've never crawled to a man before, but I've never wanted to. Now I want that. I want to do whatever he wants if it means he's going to keep looking at me like this.

He takes another step back, and then another, and I find myself crawling to him, following him across the room until he finally stops. I'm aware of my entire body: the way my breasts sway just a little as I move. I feel the air on my pussy, on my ass. I know that he can see every inch of me in this moment. I am completely exposed to him.

And then I stop crawling, too, and I look up at him.

"Beg for me," he whispers.

"Please," I say.

"Please?"

"Please give me your cock."

Suddenly, it's like I didn't actually come at all. The orgasm is already forgotten as my body starts to heat up. I'm hot. I feel like I have a fever. All I can focus on is the fact that his dick isn't inside of me, but I want it to be.

"I need you," I tell him.

He reaches down, stroking my cheek. I'm kneeling before him, and I realize that this is exactly where I want to be. It's where I need to be. I'm here, in front of him, and there's nowhere else I want to be. It's just the two of us forever. It's just us.

"I want your cock inside of me," I whisper. "Please."

Because if I don't get it soon, I feel like I'm going to die. I want him so badly that it hurts. I need him. I'm craving him.

And this is the moment where I realize that this thing between me and Ryan is never going to be normal. It's pretty fucked up. He's my boss, and I'm just some girl who works for him while I'm trying to save money. We're not going to be some tragic love story. We're just two people hooking up. Only right now, it doesn't feel like a hookup. Right now, it feels real. It feels permanent.

"I need you so much that it hurts," he says. His eyes soften, and then they harden. He didn't mean to say that, I realize. He didn't mean to share so much of himself. "Stand up," he says, and I do. I can't even keep myself from moving. When it comes to Ryan, I just do as he wants. I'll do whatever it takes to please him, I realize, because he's everything to me.

"Ryan," I start to say, but he grabs my hair and pulls my head to the side. Instantly, his lips are on my neck. He's kissing me, and one of his hands finds its way between my legs. He starts to stroke me then, and suddenly, my brain becomes hazy with longing and need and everything else.

"I want you to beg for me," he says. "It's all I think about, Alexandra. I think about you on your knees, asking me to give you my dick. I want you to kneel for me, baby. I want you to cry for me."

I don't know what that means, but I don't have time to worry because he spins me around, pushes me over so that I'm bent in half, and then his cock is nudging against me. A second later, he's filling me up, and I've never felt so controlled, so dominated.

I've never felt so full.

He fucks me relentlessly until the orgasm I'm trying to fight off completely takes over. I can't resist. I can't hold it off any longer, and then he fills me up, coming inside of me. I stay where I am, accepting everything he's offering me.

His body.

His cum.

His heart.

When it's over, he lifts me up and tugs me against him. My back is against his chest, and he's pressing kisses to my neck.

"I wish you weren't so perfect," he whispers, but before I can say anything at all, there's a knock at the door.

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