4. Erik

1200 YEARS AGO

Andvari was mocking us, I was sure of it. Any chance of returning life to my body had waned before my very eyes. I had already spent much of my undead life searching for the answer, but the riddle Andvari had delivered to us was maddening.

We were cursed to thirst for blood, to live on this earth as demons and to torture humankind. And I’d had enough. I’d found the strongest place inside my heart and taken shelter there. A place that whispered a promise of redemption to me. My own human death was what I craved. Not even the life before it anymore.

The people of my lands called me Draugr. Vampire. I was a beast feasting on blood. A man turned animal. Only the four of us remained from our long-forgotten village. Clarice, Fabian, Miles and I. Four pillars of stone who’d never fall to dust.

After Andvari had abandoned us to our fate, we had tried all manner of things to restore humanity to ourselves. But no matter how much we tried to resist the call of blood, we always ended up losing our minds for it, preying on people throughout the land until we were feared, a legend whispered as a warning to children.

Eventually, Andvari came to us once more, finding us so desperate and broken that my brothers and sister drank in every word he offered them. He had taught us how to sire humans, to create more vampires, as well as how to sire animals and make them into living spies. He urged us to spread our curse and, the crux of it all, he had promised there might be salvation in such acts if we could come to view our bane as a blessing.

When Andvari left us to our torment once more, my family and I had fought over whether to follow his word. But in the end, they had broken, and I had remained firm. I would not turn a human and inflict this horror on their soul.

Fabian was the first to place this curse upon another, and once it had begun, it did not end. Clarice and Miles followed in his footsteps, and in time, our differences tore us apart.

The others found a way of life, something to keep them sane. They had bowed to the bloodlust and sought power in it, for every human they sired held a fierce allegiance to them. It was another facet of our curse which I had never seen coming, each member of my family building an army of loyal servants, though none of the followers they created ever held the full strength we possessed.

After many more years, the four of us grew distant, each of us taking different paths and heading to the four corners of our lands in hopes that we would draw less attention to ourselves as our numbers grew.

But eventually, some of my siblings started to flaunt their powers...

A hundred years after our curse began, to the south of our homeland, Miles offered eternal life to a select few of those who gave him blood. He had grown a sizeable group of pious human followers who were rumoured to be holding an unending celebration in his name, day and night they danced, and drank, and fucked each other and vampires alike in an orgy of blood and lust.

In the east, men and women flocked to Clarice for her beauty, worshiping her in the belief that she was a deity. Their blood sacrifice was the price of her company, and they gave it willingly, bleeding for her upon an altar of gold.

In the north, Fabian used his animal spies, his familiars, to seek out the vulnerable. Humans who strayed from their towns, the lone travellers, and the outcasts. He took those who wouldn’t be missed to ensure he was never hunted down. Fabian’s fear of death made him the most cunning of us all. He never caused a stir, only sired humans who could help him gain access to more blood, made deals, and played tricks to keep his name from growing too famous, to ensure no one sought to destroy him.

Through all the years that had passed, I’d remained on the western coast of my rugged homeland where the rolling forests, the fjords and high rivers were a comfort to me like no other.

I had tried many ways to find a place in this world. A manner of living that provided blood at the smallest price. I’d even attempted not to kill for blood, but sometimes the hunger was all-consuming and I was unable to hold back when my victims were at the brink of death. Now, I felt the burden of those deaths weighing on my soul, knowing I could never undo what I had done. But through it all, I had still never sired a human as they lay dying in my arms, for death was a gift in the face of the alternative. To become like me was to tarnish your soul forever, to ensure you never walked into Valhalla, the great hall of the dead, or the eternal resting place of Helheim. That was not a fate I would steal from anyone, and I often envied them of their passage there.

It had been weeks since my last feed. I’d wandered too far inland, roaming the forests of old, praying to the gods, trying to get some answers to my damnation.

My footfalls made no noise as I crossed the mossy ground, following a well-worn path once used by tradesmen. But they’d long since moved on from this area. They believed it cursed, and I supposed I was proof of that.

What would you have me do to end this? I will do it, Andvari.

No reply came to my thoughts. Sometimes the god spoke to me in whispers between the rocks, from shining puddles and stagnant water. He was ever-present, yet always eluding me.

I paced to the still pool between five trees in a clearing at the heart of the wood, the moonlight highlighting a swirling fog between the boughs. The water appeared green beneath the canopy and the pool was formed of several boulders in an exact circle that was unnatural in its perfection. I’d discovered this place long ago. The wind barely stirred the air here, the atmosphere denser, and the forest seemed to hold its breath.

Andvari was near.

“Tell me again.” I perched on a boulder, poised in a crouch as I gazed down at the glass-like surface of the pool. Despite the glossy sheen of the water, no reflection was cast back at me, that power of this place crafted by the gods.

A single golden leaf dropped from a branch above, spiralling down and landing on the pool, the quiet so keen that it made me feel like the only creature in the world. As ripples spread out around the leaf, the water changed until my reflection appeared. Andvari always spoke to me this way, with my own mouth. A way of tormenting me perhaps.

My reflection moved, but I didn’t. It crept closer on the boulder whereas I remained perfectly still.

“Speak your name,” Andvari purred in my own voice.

“Erik Larsen,” I breathed.

“You shall be known otherwise one day,” he replied.

“Why?” I demanded, my tongue as dry as ash in my mouth.

“There is a great journey in your future,” he said, tilting his head to one side, his mouth lifting in a mocking smile.

“Tell me how to break the curse. Tell me again,” I begged.

Andvari reached toward the surface of the water and the leaf began to spin in slow circles.

“A warrior born but monster made,

Changes fates of souls enslaved.

Twins of sun and moon will rise,

When one has lived a thousand lives.

A circle of gold shall join two souls,

And a debt paid rights wrongs of old.

In a holy mountain the earth will heal,

Then the dead shall live, and the curse will keel.”

I tried to find new meaning in the words, but I could never see the answer. “Please, tell me more. Tell me what it means.”

Andvari chuckled and the branches shifted above me in an ethereal wind. “Time is your friend now. You have many years to decipher the meaning.”

“I don’t want to live this way!” I picked up a stone by my feet and threw it at the pool.

Not a splash, not a ripple. The stone sunk to the bottom and Andvari regarded it with amusement.

“You have no choice,” he said.

I thought on the prophecy as I had so many times before, but there was only one part of it I understood. “The holy mountain is Helgafjell. A place of the afterlife. My family and I have already sought it out. We have found the treasure our mothers and fathers stole from you. You know where it is. Is this not enough to pay our debt?”

Andvari sat back on the boulder, regarding me from within the pool. “That is only one part of it, Draugr...”

I scraped a hand through my hair. I was growing weary and so, so hungry. This forest was making me lose my mind; the loneliness, the silence. Sometimes I feared I would sit down against a tree one day and never rise again.

“Blood will sate you,” Andvari whispered. “You only need to seek it out.”

“The curse...it speaks of a debt,” I said, refusing to acknowledge his words. He would try to lead me astray as always. I had to find the answer to his riddle. “If I pay it in hunger, will it break the curse?”

A smile pulled at Andvari’s mouth. “Do you believe that is the answer?”

“I do not know.” I rubbed my throat, the ache there growing unbearable.

If Andvari wanted suffering, perhaps this was the solution. Perhaps it might be enough to return life to my body if I refused to give in to the urges of the curse.

“You will go mad with hunger,” Andvari said, his voice as sweet as honey. “That is a high price to pay, Erik Larsen. You will break. You will cave. You will not last a year before the thirst forces your hand.”

“I am stronger than you think,” I snarled, growing impatient. “If that is the price, I will pay it.”

Andvari’s reflection started to fade, and I knew he was leaving me to make my own decision on the matter. Was that truly my answer? Could this be the debt the prophecy spoke of?

As the water returned to a glistening pool of dark green, my decision was made.

There was only one way I could stop myself from breaking. I’d find a place which I could seal myself inside and take away the option of submitting to the curse.

I would pay my debt. And pray my heart would beat with human life once more.

I headed north to speak with Fabian. My brother. Or so we called ourselves now. Our true families were long dead thanks to us, so we’d united as siblings instead. But it did nothing to ease the pain at the loss of my real sister, the memory of her dying in my arms still a nightmare that visited me often.

The days merged. Night and day were barely distinguishable. The daylight barely grew to dawn beyond the dark clouds this time of year, and the further north I travelled, the more snow I encountered. Its icy touch was nothing in comparison to my cold body, and it was no more a burden than the winding trails of the forests.

Now, as I stood beneath the heavy shade of an oak tree, a large brown owl landed on a branch above my head.

It hooted to me, and I tilted my head to look at it. It nestled down on the branch, and I realised it was Heimdall, Fabian’s prized familiar. Dropping down, I sat with my back to the tree and waited for him to come.

Darkness fell and silence crept across the land as animals took roost, the creatures of the day going to sleep while I remained wakeful, lurking in the night. After a time, an easterly wind swept over me, and I caught the scent of blood on the air. I ran my tongue across my fangs, the hunger in me begging to be sated.

I closed my eyes, willing the urge away, my fangs prickling with the need to pierce soft flesh.

I will not be the monster Andvari made me.

The blood drew ever closer, a group of five humans, at a guess. Their scent was somehow familiar, but the ache at the base of my skull drowned out any chance of me working out why.

They moved near on silent feet. Too silent for humans, I realised.

My senses grew sharper, and I stood up, searching the dark surroundings. My eyesight was keen, and I could see as well at night as I could in the day. The forest at the base of the hill was concealing them, but I knew they were there. I could taste them on the wind.

A rush of noise made me lurch aside, and an arrow embedded itself in the oak tree behind me. I snarled as the group broke free of the trees, charging up the hill clad in fighting leathers.

Slayers.

I had been careless during my journey here, and I hadn’t checked if I was being followed. It had been months since I’d last encountered their kind. They were Idun’s revenge upon us for Andvari’s crime against her. Men and women gifted with the strength to fight us. So, to me, they were the enemy. An enemy I hadn’t chosen but was cursed with all the same. Their ancestors had been cousins to my kin once and I’d been welcome in their halls. Now all they saw in me was the monster Andvari had created.

Spilling their blood was a dangerous thing, but I was too hungry to drown out that need as they ran on swift feet in my direction, bringing me the nourishment I craved.

I grew weak in that moment. And I knew, as they crested the snowy hill with battle cries and swords drawn, that the curse was about to claim me once more.

“Stop!” I roared, but they didn’t.

Two women and three men.

A man reached me first, just a youth barely past twenty years of age.

He lunged with his sword, and I shifted aside, grabbing his wrist and wheeling him around, trying to snap the bone. He roared a challenge, kicking me in the chest with his godly power and I staggered back, baring my fangs. He was strong, but no creature on this earth was stronger than I, and with the bloodlust warring through my skull and the sound of their pounding hearts all around me, I fell into chaos.

I collided with the man as he took another stab at me with his sword, and I narrowly avoided the strike with a burst of speed, coming up behind him and throwing a brutal punch to his spine. He collapsed to his knees with a cry of agony, then rolled and swung the blade at my legs, the edge of it slicing my thigh before I managed to throw a sharp kick to his head that made him fall still. The burn of that blade made me growl, the blood wetting my leg telling me I had just earned myself a fresh scar.

A second slayer came at me from behind, and I threw my elbow back, catching him in the nose as he tried to drive a dagger into my back. He hit the ground and I twisted toward him, catching hold of him by the throat and lifting him skyward as he lost his grip on his weapon.

A sword came ringing through the air to my right and I shot away with another burst of speed, missing the deadly blow as the other three slayers came for me.

The one in my hold wriggled and thrashed, reaching for another blade at his hip, and with a furious effort, I broke his neck, tossing him into the snow while his kin screamed in horror at what I’d done.

The three of them leapt on me at once, and a searing pain scored into my side as a slayer blade met my skin. The female it belonged to fought with a skill that outmatched the others, and I broke free of the other two slayers as I lunged for her, catching her hair in my fist. She cut it free with her blade, leaving the clump of blonde hair in my grip as she stabbed at me once more.

I cursed, darting aside, the blade skimming my hip and burning like fire. I ran at her full force, knocking her away from me, and she slammed to the ground, her head cracking against a rock and a gasp of shock leaving her lips.

Blood spilled and the madness deepened as I tasted it on the air.

A girl of similar looks screamed as she saw what I had done to the other woman. It didn’t matter, because she was my next victim. She fought with fury and heart, but her body was soon slack in my arms as the final man grabbed my neck from behind, bringing his sword around to my throat. Before it made contact, I rammed my head back into his face, dropping us both to the ground.

I felt nothing. I was nothing.

I rolled on top of him and buried my fangs in his throat, taking the drink I so desperately craved, sating the vicious beast who had made a home in my body. The slayer clawed and scratched, his sword fallen to the ground and lost to the cold depths of the snow.

The white world turned red around me. The monster in me fed until it could get no more.

Blood soaked my body and ran down my chin as I spat out the last of my drink. I cared minimally for their loss, but I cared more for my immortal soul. A soul now marred in blood once more.

“Brother!”

I turned, spotting Fabian as he sped up the hill toward me. He was at my side in moments, clutching my arm and pulling me to my feet.

“I heard the fight, I came as fast as I could,” he said, shaking me when I didn’t respond.

The pain in my back grew sharper and I clutched the deepest wound I had sustained as my body struggled to heal from the cuts of those blessed blades.

I gazed down at the bodies surrounding us in the snow, wishing I’d stayed back on the coast and found a cave to seal myself inside there. But I needed to tell someone my plan. If I was remade as a human, I had to ensure someone could let me out.

“Fabian,” I whispered, meeting his dark gaze. “I may have found a way to break the curse.”

His rusty eyes roamed over me intently. “Is that so?”

“I wish to rid myself of this hunger by starving it out of me.” I hissed between my teeth at the pain in my body. Slowly, it was easing. But it would take a while. The slayer blades were nothing like a human’s. They were designed to hurt us, imbued with the power of Idun herself.

“You say this covered in blood.” Fabian smiled, dropping to his knees and digging his fangs into one of the women who groaned in protest, the slayer still barely clinging to life.

I watched with cold detachment as he drained what remaining life she had left, wanting to feel something. Anything. But the blood frenzy I had been lost to only left me with a high like no other. Later, the guilt would come.

“I do not wish to be like this forever,” I told him as he rose beside me, a glimmer of satisfaction in his gaze.

“Come, stay with me a while, Erik. You can make peace with the bloodlust. There need be no guilt in it. I pick off the weak, that is no crime in our world of hardship. The townspeople will thank us.”

“Fabian...” I shook my head sharply. “My decision is made. I will trap myself inside a cave. I want you to be my guardian. To watch over my crypt until the gods return life to my body.”

He slid an arm around my shoulders, guiding me down the hill as snowflakes began to fall, fluttering in the air around us. “You are too hard on yourself. Don’t be a fool. You will go mad with the hunger.”

“Perhaps, but Andvari will be watching, Fabian. This could be the debt he speaks of in the prophecy.”

Fabian sighed. “I can see your mind is made up.”

“It is. Will you help me?”

He clutched my arm. “Of course, brother. I will do as you ask.”

“It could bring your life back too,” I said. “Maybe this will be enough of a payment for all of us.”

Fabian ground his jaw. “Perhaps,” he muttered, glancing away.

We walked on for miles, heading deep into the forest until we arrived at the edge of a large cave which sat on the curve of a river.

“Are you sure about this?” Fabian asked. “At least spend an evening with me first.”

I shook my head. “Now, Fabian. It cannot wait another day. My penance must begin before more death is dealt at my hand.”

I started gathering large rocks, building a wall before the cave and ignoring the stabbing pain from the cuts across my body. Fabian joined me, helping to build the wall that could hold me in this place until Andvari deemed my suffering enough.

It was nearly morning by the time a small hole was all that remained in the wall, just large enough for me to enter through.

I stepped toward it and Fabian took my arm. “Don’t do this, brother.”

I cupped the back of his neck and pulled him into an embrace, our familial bond flaring between us. “Let me pay this debt. Do not deny it of me.”

He sighed, releasing me and gesturing for me to go inside. “Do as you must.”

“Visit me every week,” I asked, and he nodded stiffly.

I climbed through the narrow space, wincing as my skin flexed against my wounds. I dropped into the dank cave beyond the wall and fear flickered on the edges of my soul, but I didn’t let it seize me. I was born a warrior. And I would die as one too. But not until my human body was restored.

“Fabian!” I called to him beyond the wall. “Do not release me until I am human. Let me waste here until the debt is paid.”

“This is madness, Erik,” he growled. “I will release you the moment it becomes too much to bear.”

“Even if I beg, do not let me out,” I demanded. “If you love me, you will do as I ask. I demand it of you as my brother. My kin. Please, Fabian.”

He fell quiet for so long that I thought he might have left me there, but then he forced stones into the hole and continued until it was packed solid, trapping me there alone.

I lowered myself down onto a rock, the darkness absolute.

And here, I would wait.