Chapter Ten

Aurelia

Ahint of acrid smoke wafts through the air as I slip into the bedroom, eager to shower with Mattia. I missed him all day. Being by myself was strange after spending so long under constant guard, but I didn't hate it. I simply missed my husband. His commanding presence and those steely gray eyes comfort me in ways nothing ever has before now.

He's my peace, my safety. Ironic that I'd find it in the one place I've been terrified of going for the last two months—my brothers' inner circle. But Mattia gives me hope that I've never had.

In his arms, I don't feel like I'm drowning. For once, I feel like maybe, just maybe, there is a way out of this for all of us.

I didn't realize how badly I needed that until he gave it to me last night. I've been so afraid to tell anyone, so convinced that no one would believe me and that there was no way this ended without blood and pain, that I stopped hoping there was a way out.

Today is the first time, I feel like maybe I'm not going to lose everything. Maybe we can save my mom. Maybe my brothers won't hate me. Maybe, just maybe, Mattia is the answer to every desperate prayer I've spoken since Brio invaded my life and turned it into a waking nightmare.

As I approach the bathroom, I hear his voice murmuring from inside.

Is he on the phone?

"Jesus Christ, Coda," he mutters.

I pause outside the door, not wanting to interrupt his conversation. Truthfully, Coda scares me a little bit. I've never met anyone as big or formidable as him. He kept watching me last night as if he was trying to figure me out. He didn't look angry. Just…quietly intense. He's a hard man to read.

"What do you want me to say?" Mattia growls suddenly, startling me. "That I fucking married her to protect the family?"

My heart slams against my ribcage. They're talking about me—about why he married me.

"That I did what I had to do just like I always do?" he asks. "That I'm a fucking heartless asshole for it? You already knew that."

I stand there, frozen, my hands trembling as his harsh words twist through me. They're a betrayal, crushing me. He told me that he married me to protect me. But he didn't, did he?

He did it to protect them—my brothers.

Everything in me wants to deny what I've heard—to scream that it isn't true. That this isn't Mattia. He doesn't lie. He's fiercely loyal and dangerous, but he loves me.

His next words destroy that illusion entirely, ripping through me like a bomb blast.

"Do you want me to tell you that I regret marrying her or that I never should have done it? What is it you want to hear, Coda?"

My hand flies to my mouth, desperately trying to stifle the cry threatening to break free.

He regrets marrying me. The one thing I think I've done right in my life…he'd take back if he could.

No.

No.

No.

Yet, no matter how many times I deny it, I can't change what I heard. He regrets marrying me.

My heart shatters into a million tiny pieces, each one cutting deeper than the last.

All of this, every moment has been a lie. I'm still just a pawn, a piece to move around the board. And he's been moving me this whole damn time.

Worse, I've let him.

I've believed every single word he's said.

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to push away the hurt, but it's futile. The pain is raw and relentless, tearing at my heart and soul.

"Please," I whimper, a plea for this nightmare to end. But there's no escaping the truth: the man I love, the one I thought loved me back, only tied himself to me to protect my brothers.

I've been so afraid to trust him with my truth, terrified it'd break us, but there was never anything to break in the first place. It was all just a lie.

A tidal wave of pain crashes over me, intense and infinite. It threatens to sweep me off my feet and drag me under, killing every last ounce of hope I have left.

I stumble away from the bathroom door, tears blinding me as his words continue to echo in my head over and over again. They sing in twisted distortions that bounce around inside my skull, taunting me like some child's playground song.

I regret marrying her

Ashes, ashes

We all fall down.

I want to storm in there and scream and rage at him, but I don't have the strength. And he doesn't get to see me cry. Not now. Not ever again.

My thoughts race, searching for something—anything—to cling onto, some semblance of hope to give me a little strength. But all I find are fragments of memories, bittersweet reminders of the way I love him…now tainted by betrayal and deceit.

I thought he gave me everything, but he's no better than Brio. He's just as manipulative. Just as dangerous. And damn it all, I fell for it, hook, line, and sinker.

"Stupid, stupid girl," I mutter. Once again, I let someone in this world manipulate me. And once again, my mother is going to pay the price. It hurts like hell this time. Because I always hated Brio, but I actually believed Mattia. I fell for him.

Well, no more.

I'm done being a pawn. I'm done being manipulated. And I'm done playing by their rules. He doesn't get to break me.

They don't get to win.

I won't let my mother die because of my mistakes. If he regrets marrying me, so be it. I'll make sure he regrets every damn second.

Taking a deep breath, I tiptoe from the bedroom and then down the hall. My mind races with plans, desperate and reckless, but I'll do whatever it takes to save my mom.

As I reach the front door, I pause, my hand hovering over the handle.

My heart screams at me to stay, to fight, but there's nothing here to fight for. Mattia doesn't want me. He never did. His loyalty was never mine. Neither was his heart. He had every piece of me.

And all I had were beautiful lies.

I was just too blind to see it.

With a quiet sob, I slip off his ring, leaving it on the floor alongside the fragmented pieces of my heart.