Chapter 16

16

Evenie

I t had been a full two weeks since I’d moved with my parents and brought Summer with me. That had been a dreadful conversation for me. I hated to feel like I was taking her away from her father, but I needed my time with her… just not in that house. It was that same Monday after we got her from school. Before we headed back to the house after taking care of business, I had Tyrion stop me by a local department store to grab me a set of luggage. When we got back, I promptly packed all my clothes and belongings.

The look on Tyrion’s face as he carried them to the car was one of despair and regret. I couldn’t feel bad for him. It hurt me to have to leave, but it was for the best for both of us. He’d gone to pick Summer up from school while I prepared dinner. I figured it would be best to break the news to her over dinner. She’d come home in a good mood. We’d talked while she did her homework and I finished cooking.

I let her eat about half her food before I cleared my throat to speak.

“Summer?”

She looked over at me as she forked a helping of salad into her mouth. “Ma’am?”

“I have something to tell you.”

She looked from me to her father, who offered a weak smile, despite the pain in his eyes.

“What is it?”

“I um… I think it would be best if I went to stay with Nana and Paw Paw.”

Her eyes widened. “You aren’t gonna live here anymore?”

“No, baby.”

“But… but I just got you back.”

I covered her hand with mine when I saw the tears in her eyes. “Hey, now. Don’t cry. You still have me, baby. I’m not going anywhere, anytime soon.”

“But why are you moving?”

“Well, it’s a little awkward being here. Your father is getting married. I guess it’s not really fair to either of us to be here when he has a fiancée. I’m sure they want to spend time together as a couple, and it would just be weird with me here.”

“Ms. Iona is cool with you being here, right, Daddy?”

If only she knew the truth , I thought to myself.

“Your mother is right, Summer,” he said faintly.

“But I don’t want you to go!” Summer protested. “Daddy, do something! Make her stay!”

“She’s made up her mind, princess. But…” He sighed heavily as he looked over at me. “How would you feel about going with her for a little while?”

“You mean, live with Nana and Paw Paw?”

“Yes.”

“But what about you?”

“I’ll see you every day, baby. I’ll pick you up for school and bring you home. On the weekends, we can all go do something fun. Just me, you, and your mom. How about that?”

Summer’s gaze passed between us. “But who’s gonna make sure you get up in the morning?”

Tyrion chuckled. “I’ll make sure I don’t hit the snooze button.”

She smiled softly. “Well, I would miss you, Daddy. But I wanna spend more time with Mommy. I’m not used to her yet.”

“That’s perfectly okay, baby girl. Me and you are locked in for life.”

He reached across the table, and they did the cutest little dap up.

That night, he and I helped her pack up a few weeks’ worth of clothes before he took us to my parents. He looked so sad when we walked him to the door to say good night. He hugged her tightly before going outside. I stepped onto the porch and closed the door.

“I know you’ll take care of her, but I miss her already. I’m not used to having the house completely to myself for more than a weekend.”

“Well, make good use of the time you have alone. You have a lot to figure out.”

“I guess I do.” There was an awkward silence between us before he reached for me and pulled me into a hug. “I’m sorry, Evenie. I never wanted things to be like this.”

I pulled away from him. “I’m sure you didn’t, but it is what it is now. Good night, Tyrion.”

I’d left him standing there and gone back into the house. Since then, things hadn’t been any less awkward between us, and Summer was starting to notice it. We tried to save face in front of her, but there was obvious tension.

“Summer… Summer, baby, it’s time to get up,” I said, gently shaking her.

Her pretty eyes fluttered open, and she looked up at me. “Good morning, Mommy.”

“Good morning, baby. Did you sleep okay?”

“Yes. You woke me up in the middle of a good dream.”

I chuckled. “I’m sorry, love. What were you dreaming?”

“You and Daddy took me to Disney World for my birthday. We were having so much fun.”

“Is this your way of telling me that’s what you want for your birthday?”

She grinned. “Maybe.” Her smile faded slowly. “You know what I really want?”

“What’s that?”

“For you and Daddy to stop fighting.”

“Baby, we aren’t fighting.”

“Then why do you look so sad around each other? Somebody should apologize.”

I sighed. “It’s not as simple as an apology to fix what’s wrong with me and your dad.”

“Is it Ms. Iona? Are you sad because they’re getting married?”

I paused for a moment, thinking of how I could answer her question without seeming bitter.

“Summer… I love your father very much. Because I love him, it hurts me to see him with Ms. Iona. I thought me, you, and him would have been a family when I came home, but we can’t be… not in that way.”

“What if they broke up? Then would you be happy?”

“No, baby. Your father deserves to be happy, even if it isn’t with me. I will never wish ill will toward him. If Ms. Iona makes him happy, then I just have to accept that.”

“Can I tell you something?”

“You can tell me anything.”

“I wanted you and Daddy to be together. I used to wish for it all the time when you were gone.”

Knowing she wanted her family together, as much as I did, had me fighting back tears. I wished like hell I could give that to her, but that just wasn’t where we were.

“Well, we might not be together, but we both love you very much. Nothing will ever change that.” I pulled her in for a hug and kissed her cheek. “Come on. Get your clothes out and go take your shower. Nana is cooking breakfast.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

I left her to get ready for school while I went into the kitchen with my mom.

“She up?” she asked, glancing up from the pot of grits.

“She is. Thank God she’s an easy child to wake up.”

Mom giggled. “I had to all but drag you out of bed in the morning. Your father could always get you right up though.”

I smirked. “Between you and me, Daddy used to bribe me.”

She looked at me with her hands on her hips. “Oh, did he now? David!”

I laughed as my father came around the corner with shaving cream all over his face.

“What did I do?” he asked.

“So you used to bribe our daughter to get out of bed for school?”

My father looked at me and waved his razor blade. “I’ve never known you to be a snitch,” he jested.

“Daddy, I’m thirty-five. I’d say I kept that secret a long time.”

He grinned and winked at me before turning to my mother. “The point is, she got up, love.”

My mother tossed a dish towel at him as he headed back down the hall. “Sometimes I don’t like that man.”

“But you love him all the time.”

“I do. That’s my man, and I’m gonna stick beside him.”

I smiled. I envied my parents’ marriage in the best way possible. They’d been together since they were fifteen years old and still just as much in love. I’d never seen them raise their voices at each other or fight. They always spoke to each other with the utmost respect. My father was forever fawning all over her with hugs and kisses, and she would always giggle like a schoolgirl.

They were the couple I modeled my marriage after.

“You hungry, baby?” my mother asked, breaking my thoughts.

“Not really.”

“Evenie, your eating habits have been questionable lately.”

“I just haven’t had much of an appetite, Mom.”

“You’re stressed. I can tell. I could hear you pacing the floor several times last night.”

Sleep had been a foreign concept since I got home. I hadn’t gotten a good night’s rest in weeks.

“Have you spoken with Dr. Stewart?”

Dr. Stewart was the therapist I’d started seeing. While I knew it would be helpful talking to her, I’d been having trouble opening up. Where I was once an open book, I hated feeling vulnerable now.

“I have an appointment this morning,” I answered.

“Are you gonna talk to her this time?”

I shrugged. “It’s my intention to talk to her whenever we meet, but it’s hard, Ma. I don’t want to feel like I’m complaining. I survived and made it out of a bad situation when a lot of people aren’t as fortunate. Who am I to sulk about the way life is back at home when so many people in my shoes never get to come home?”

“True. They may not get to come home, but this is your reality. You’re entitled to your feelings, and they are valid. Talk to her, baby. About everything. Again, I hear you pacing at night. I know you aren’t okay when you say you’re okay. Please… talk to her.”

I nodded. “I hear you, Ma. I’m gonna go shower and get dressed.”

“Hey.” She walked over and pulled me in for the hug I so desperately needed. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

She kissed my cheek and released me. I headed back to my bedroom and stripped down for my shower. For the longest time, I stood under the rainfall showerhead, allowing the water to mask my tears as I did every morning. For two weeks, this was a daily occurrence. I was feeling the weight of my feelings, yet I just kept bottling up what I could and allowing the rest to simmer on the back burner.

I was miserable.

My plan had been to move in here, raise my daughter, and try to get my job back to feel some sense of normalcy. It hadn’t quite worked that way. I had no desire to leave the house most days. Every day after Summer Rose left for school, I locked myself in the room and sat in the middle of my walk-in closet, staring at the door. Somehow, it reminded me of being back in the basement.

No windows.

One door.

One way in and one way out.

Ironically enough, it was the only place I felt normal because it was my normal for so long. In there, I sat with my thoughts… my hopes and dreams… my feelings. No one could see my tears. No one could witness the pain in my eyes. I was just… alone.

Shaking the depressive thoughts from my head, I quickly bathed myself and got out of the shower. After drying off, I brushed my teeth and moisturized my skin before getting dressed for the day. By the time I came out, Tyrion was standing in the living room waiting on Summer Rose. When our eyes met, I saw the same thing in his that I saw in mine every time I looked in the mirror.

Sadness. Regret. Defeat.

He offered me a weak smile. “Good morning, love.”

“Good morning.”

“I was thinking we could take Summer to the Fall Festival this weekend. We go every year. I thought you might enjoy it.”

I nodded. “Sure.”

“Great. I’ll pick y’all up around eleven.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

I wasn’t looking forward to spending time with him at all, but it was for my baby, so I would suck it up. I blew a breath of relief as Summer Rose came running into the room with her backpack.

“I’m ready!” she announced.

“Give me some love,” I said, opening my arms. She didn’t hesitate to give me a big, tight hug. “Have a good day. I love you.”

“I love you too. Bye, Nana! Bye, Paw Paw! Love you!”

“Bye, baby!” my parents called. “We love you too!”

She headed for the door while Tyrion stared at me for a moment. Reaching out, he grabbed my hand and kissed my knuckles.

“Have a good day, love.”

“You too.”

I folded my arms and watched as he and our daughter walked out of the house, feeling like half my heart was leaving with them.