Chapter 49

CHAPTER FOURTY-NINE

LAKE

52 bobas left until we both die … (the same day)

“Apologies, but I’ll be stealing Tam away for a little while.” Elena’s eyes are hard on me, like she suspects I’ve got something to do with the leaked videos. I might not have done anything, but somebody in my family did. I’m nauseous, dizzy on my feet with betrayal and fear.

Because Tam is not happy.

His hand is clenched around that phone like a claw. The edge of his lip is curled up in a disgusted scowl. He’s ice-cold fury and pop star petty, and it is not a safe combination for me. If Tam kicks me out of his house, out of his life, it’s over.

Fifty-two bubble teas and a cold grave.

Tam drags his attention away from the phone and over to me. Our eyes meet, and I can see that he’s struggling with a mix of emotions. What can I possibly do here but apologize? I assured him that he’d be safe with me and my family. I encouraged him to be vulnerable around me. Somebody that I trusted betrayed us both and made his worst fears come true.

“I’m sorry—” I start, but Tam clenches his teeth and cuts me off.

“Give me your phone, Lake.” He holds out his hand, and I hesitate. My phone? What does he need my phone for? I think of all the ways that Tam has tested me in the past and realize that this is another one. He wants to see if I have the videos on my phone, if there’s any evidence of me having uploaded them.

It hurts. It hurts so bad that he doesn’t trust me anymore. But why the hell should he? He trusted my judgment, and my judgment was bad. When he holds out his hand, I give him the phone without complaint.

“The CEO called me personally,” Elena continues, crossing her arms. What a way to meet my boyfriend’s mother. The whole sun-soaked afternoon is ruined. And there’s Tam, wearing the sweater I so carefully treated and washed for him. I can still taste him on my lips, can feel him between my thighs. To see his face as cold as it is? What a blow. “The internet is calling you a cheater, and they’re calling her—”

“Enough,” Tam growls, slipping both my phone and his mother’s into his pocket. “Don’t you dare say a word.”

“Tam, I—” I reach out a hand for his sweater sleeve.

“If you need a phone …” he begins, voice measured. I end up dropping my hand by my side. It doesn’t seem like the best idea to touch him while he’s in this mood. I very clearly remember the blow job incident. “There’s one in my office. Laptop, too.”

“Thomas,” Elena begins, but he sweeps right past her, taking off down the hall at a clip that I couldn’t keep up with unless I ran after him. Should I? Am I meant to be chasing him down right now, doing my best to explain things? Elena and I exchange a long look, but I have no idea what to say to her that’ll help.

“I’m sorry,” I repeat again, but she just turns and follows her son down the hallway.

“It had to be Chloe!” Lynn is saying over the phone, her voice hushed, like she’s trying to have this conversation with me where nobody else can hear it. Maybe because we’re having a terrible, awful discussion that neither of us wants to have.

Somebody in my family leaked private videos of me and Tam.

That first one was filmed in our second-floor hallway. I do my best to think back to who might’ve been there at the time, but I’m coming up empty. Obviously, it had to be someone who was at the tea shop with us, in order for them to upload both videos.

That leaves Lynn, Maria, Luna, Ella … and Chloe.

Chloe, whom I’ve known since preschool. Chloe, who sat with me every night for two weeks after Joe died. Chloe, who I trusted with something that could endanger my life.

Because if Tam takes this the wrong way, I’m screwed.

All along, his greatest fear was being used, being put on display, manipulated and deceived.

And this? It’s exactly what he was so nervous about. He let go and gave himself fully to me, and this is how I repay him?

The way his mom was looking at me, I could tell she wanted a minute alone with him. The way Tam was looking at everyone and everything, I thought maybe he needed a century to calm down. I came upstairs, waited in his bedroom for an hour or two.

When I went downstairs to check on them later, they were gone.

The house is empty.

So here I am, sitting on the edge of Tam’s desk, unsure if I’ll even still be welcome here, making phone calls back home. Fortunately, I’m from a bygone era. I memorize the important phone numbers in my life.

“Chloe,” I start, but I can’t make myself say it. If she really did this, then she put my life at risk. This could be the reason that Tam and I can’t break the curse. And for what? What did she get out of posting those videos? “Oh, fuck, Lynn. Oh, fuck.”

“Lake, I don’t want to scare you, but it’s going mega-viral.”

“What are people saying?” I ask, but then I wish I hadn’t because I can take a guess.

“That Tam is cheating on Kaycee, that you’re a …” She can’t say it, but we both know. Nothing good. “Have you tried calling Chloe? I did, but she won’t pick up. If you think about how the dance video was filmed, it could only have been her or Maria. And, come on.” Lynn scoffs. “It wasn’t Maria.”

My cousin loves me, but she loves my mom more. She would never do something like this and risk ruining her relationship with her aunt.

So, Lynn is right.

It had to be Chloe.

“I’ll call her,” I say, and I can hear the brush of Lynn’s face against the phone as she nods. I smile at that. “I love you, Lynn. Talk to you later.”

“Love you, Lake. Keep me updated.”

I hang up first, dialing Chloe’s number and waiting. Waiting. Waiting. I dial her a second time, and I’m sent straight to voicemail. With a sigh, I try messaging her from Tam’s laptop. I copy and paste that same message onto every social media platform that Chloe frequents.

I really need to talk to you. Please get back to me as soon as you can.

The fact that she isn’t picking up, isn’t responding when we both know that she’s addicted to her phone, that’s a concern. That’s what makes me feel guilty.

I retreat to Tam’s bedroom, fall back on the mattress, and edge up into the pillows.

Tam on the sofa, strong and confident above me. Making me come. Letting me drag him around by the wrist. Wearing the sweater that he rutted into my hips.

I roll on my side and close my eyes.

If I’m in his bed, then he can’t avoid me forever.

51 bobas left until we both die …

When I wake up in the morning, Tam isn’t with me in bed.

I’m alone, but I’m still in his house. That’s a good sign, right? He can’t be that angry with me. I scramble back to the office, using the laptop to check my messages. Nothing from Tam or Chloe, but plenty from the rest of my family.

Namely from—

“There you fucking are.” It’s Joules, throwing open the doors with a scowl. “Lakelynn, what the hell? I ask you to text me twice a day, and then something like this happens, and you don’t call me once.”

“Tam took my phone from me,” I mumble defensively, swiveling in the chair to look at my brother. He’s got one shoulder leaned up against the doorjamb, arms crossed, scowl locked firmly in place. “I’m sorry that I told you not to worry about anything. Yet, here you are again, because of me.”

My brother softens a little. But only a little.

“Where is he?” Joules demands, but I just shake my head. I had Tam’s number saved to the cloud, so I was able to retrieve it from his laptop. Can’t get ahold of him. My calls go straight to voicemail.

“I have no idea. He won’t answer my messages.” I tap my fingers on the edge of the desk. “Joules, this is really bad. Tam is a super private person, and now that image of him and me is out and … What about Kaycee? Is she doing okay?” I feel horrible because I’ve only just now thought of the implications for her. Isn’t it going to look like Tam Eyre cheated on her with some nobody girl from Arkansas?

“Kaycee is fine. Didn’t you see that she and Tam put out a joint press release?” Joules raises his eyebrow as he comes over to stand in front of me, showing off his phone screen.

Tam and Kaycee: We Both Found Love But We Had a Contract.

Oh.

Holy shit.

Love?

I snatch Joules’ phone, scrolling quickly down the article. There’s a video that goes with it, but Joules steals it back before I can click on it.

“Did you see all of this?” he asks, and then he shows me all the videos that’ve been popping up since yesterday. Videos of Tam kissing me in Japantown, videos of us having peppermint boba and Thai tea ice cream in Portland, a quick snippet of footage before the SUV door closes and Tam has me in his lap. “Do you think that bastard did any of these things by accident? He knew people would see him.”

I squint at the phone as I think about it.

Joules is right.

As soon as the public found out Tam was with the freckled girl with green hair, these things started to be uploaded and paid attention to. Tam would anticipate that, wouldn’t he? I bet he did.

I’m still stuck on the first thing that Joules showed me.

I use the laptop to search for the original article, tapping play on the video. There’s Tam, smiling in that beatific way of his, still wearing the sweater that he fucked into me, and that I washed. I shift a little on the chair as he leans forward to speak into the microphone. Kaycee is seated beside him, arms crossed over her chest, not looking quite so nice as she usually does. Her eyes are narrowed to slits, and she stares at the gathered crowd with unmasked irritation.

“We had a press release planned, but … life happens.” Tam chuckles and then reaches up to push his strawberry hair back from his forehead. Silver flashes pepper him as people take pictures. “Kaycee and I are each pursuing different relationships, but we can assure our fans that this won’t affect our performances together. We apologize for not putting our music and our fans first …”

Joules waits patiently, but it’s a lot of word salad and little value. Doesn’t matter. The press eats up the words coming out of Tam’s mouth. Kaycee adds her thoughts in short, clipped tones, puckering her fuchsia-painted lips in a way that I know Joules likes. He sighs strangely from his spot in the doorway.

“We’re human, too,” Kaycee says, staring out at the reporters and influencers and superfans like they’re letting her down by making such a big deal out of this. “Please respect our privacy until we’re ready to reveal more. Tam, in particular, has had his privacy violated more than once. Do your part by reporting the video when you see it, and by not participating in a flame war on an innocent girl that you know nothing about.”

“Sources say that the girl’s name is Lakelynn Frost, a college student from Alabama,” someone calls out, and Tam’s mouth twitches. His hands tighten into fists on the tabletop. He’s pissed off, but he’s doing his best to keep his emotions hidden. God, I don’t blame him.

Chloe, how could you do this to me? I think, certain by now that it was her. If it wasn’t, she would’ve called me back or at least texted me. This radio silence is … very telling. My heart shifts a little, cracked into pieces that grate on one another when I move. Being betrayed by someone you trust is the worst feeling in the world. It’s almost worse than watching them die because it means the person you thought they were never really existed in the first place.

I wish Joe were here.

“She’s from Arkansas,” Tam corrects, and then he stands up with a forced smile on his face. “Thank you so much for joining us. We’ll talk more soon, okay?” He makes a little heart with his fingers against his cheek, winks suggestively, and then leaves the stage. Kaycee isn’t far behind him.

That was posted yesterday afternoon. So where is he? I wish he would let me talk to him, but I can understand why he might need a minute to himself. Maybe he stayed in a hotel to get some space? Maybe Tam is here in the house, and I just don’t know it because it’s so cavernous?

“Mom and Dad said there are reporters outside, but Uncle Rob sprayed the hose at them, and they backed off a little.” Joules shrugs, like it’s no big thing. “So, it was one of your shithead friends, was it? I told you not to bring them with us.”

“Chloe,” I whisper, closing my eyes against the knife in my back. “It was Chloe.”

Joules scoffs, but I hear footsteps as he approaches the bed, wrapping me up in his strong arms.

“I’m sorry, Canoe,” he tells me, once again stepping in to fix a shitty situation. I told him that Tam and I could do this together, that in the best possible way, I didn’t need him right now. Look at where we are. “Tam bailed and you haven’t seen him since yesterday?” I nod, cheek squished up against Joules’ midsection. “Come on then. My turn to cook for you.”

Joules pulls me off the chair and then lets go of my hand. Unlike me, he seems to have no trouble navigating straight to the kitchen, and he doesn’t have to cut across random patios to get there. I breathe out a small sigh when I see the ugly, modular sofa where Tam had me pinned and wanting just yesterday. How could something like this happen? I was so careful. I pursued him so fucking carefully.

I rub at my face, this sense of dread settling in me that I know I have to come to terms with.

Tam and I have less than two months to break the curse. That’s it. And now, we have an obstacle beyond the simple, basic math of two people getting to know one another. Chloe has shoved a boulder into my path, and I don’t know how to get around it.

“We might die, Joules,” I whisper, just standing there as he starts rummaging around in the fridge. He goes very still and looks around the door at me. It’s this big, double-wide commercial thing that holds way more food than one person could ever need. It’s well-stocked with things that I know Tam can’t eat on the regular. Did he have one of his assistants buy all this food for me? “Tam and I, we might actually fucking die.”

Joules closes the fridge, and it catches on the edge of my mind how weird it is that the kitchen is clean. I left it a mess yesterday, intending to come back and clean up after Tam and I had … So, yes to the cleaning crew? I don’t even care right now. Irrelevant.

I rub my temples and close my eyes.

“Lake …” That’s my brother, his voice broken and edged with fear. But then he stops talking, and I hear another sound. My eyes open to see Tam, using the long sleeve of his sweatshirt to open the glass door that faces the kitchen.

He kicks his shoes off and then just stands there, looking between the pair of us.

I can’t move. I can’t breathe. I don’t know what to say to him except …

“Tam, I’m so sorry,” I whisper, and his green eyes widen slightly. I walk a little too quickly, and then I run, throwing my arms around his waist and squeezing him with every ounce of my sincerity. Maybe, if I’m as fully honest with him as I can be, he won’t be too upset with me.

“Lakelynn,” he starts, reaching down for my arms.

“I’ll be outside,” Joules growls, and I can hear him stomping around in that way of his. “Right outside. As in, if you fuck this up, I will end the curse early just for the pleasure of seeing you squirm.”

The glass door slams as he makes his exit, and Tam finally gets a proper hold on my arms.

“Lake, stop, stop, stop,” he says, and when he pushes me away, I let go. He’s holding me by the forearms, still wearing that stupid sweater, pink hair a chaotic swirl around his handsome face. His lips are parted, eyes wide. “What are you doing?”

Tam leans down to peer at me, and it all comes pouring out of me in a rush.

“I’m so sorry,” I tell him, thinking about that intimate moment in the hallway, the one that now no longer belongs to just the two of us. The world has a hold of that now, and I hate it. Maybe it’s a good thing that Chloe isn’t around because I’m not sure that I’d be able to hold back. How could she do something like that to me—with or without the curse? I look right into Tam’s eyes, and I tell him the truth. “I didn’t know that … I can’t believe Chloe would … We’ve known each other since preschool.”

“Lakelynn.” Tam grips my forearms nice and tight, his voice firm. “What I meant was: why are you apologizing to me for something you didn’t do?”

I just stare at him, completely and utterly confused.

“Wait, you’re not upset?” I ask, and Tam gets this lopsided sort of smile on his face. He lifts a hand and uses his thumb to swipe under my eye. Maybe I had a tear, but I won’t admit to it.

“Upset? Oh, I’m upset alright. What happened between us in the hallway that day, that was for me and you.” His jaw clenches, but he forces himself to relax, sweeping hair back from my face. “Also, this is not how I wanted the news of our relationship to break. What I don’t understand is why you think I’m mad at you?”

“I …” Words fail me there for a minute. I take a small step back from Tam, just so I can have the space I need to think. When he’s in my space, I forget about everything but him. “I thought you were … Well, I guess I was sitting here waiting for you to kick me out of your house.” I give a little laugh, rubbing at the back of my neck the way that Tam does sometimes.

“Kick you out …” Tam tapers off, and I look up to see this slow, dawning horror on his face. “You’ve been sitting here thinking that I was going to kick you out?” He’s blinking rapidly at me, like he’s as confused as I am. “Didn’t you get my notes? Or the new phone I left for you?”

“I didn’t get any notes,” I admit, wondering why he didn’t call the landline to speak with me. Or … maybe he did, and I just didn’t hear it ring while I was asleep? There’s only one phone in the office that I know about.

“Lake, both of our phone numbers got leaked along with the videos. I left you a brand-new phone on the counter with a note. I … Shit.” Now Tam is the one rubbing at the back of his neck, and I almost smile at the sight. “You’ve been sitting here since, what, yesterday, thinking that I was going to kick you out of my life? Fuck me.” Tam spits those last two words out, but he isn’t looking at me anymore. I think he’s finally noticed that Joules is leaned back against one of the glass walls outside, waiting. “I left my girlfriend alone, scared and worried for two days?” He sounds shocked that this is even happening which I take to be a good thing.

“You trusted me, Tam. You came to meet my friends even though you knew it was probably a bad idea. You danced for them. You came to my house, and you bared your heart to me, and now …” I gesture loosely with one of my hands. “And your phone number? How did Chloe get your …” There were numerous opportunities for Chloe to do that. I let my friends and family touch and use my phone as needed, without any questions whatsoever. “Anyway, that’s who it was. My friend, Chloe.” My breath hitches a little, but I need to deal with Tam before I can deal with Chloe.

“Lakelynn, Canoe, Kayak, Paddle Boat … listen to me. We have a lot of misunderstandings happening right now, but I need you to understand one thing first. I’m going to make it perfectly clear, okay?” Tam rubs his thumbs over both of my cheeks now. “We are way past the point of me doing something as stupid as kicking you out on a whim.” He exhales, almost like he’s in pain. “I know how I treated you at the rental house. I know it was bad. I know that. But you and I …”

I put my own hands over his, pressing them into the sides of my face. My heart is skipping and stuttering like a broken record. I don’t interrupt Tam. I just wait, patiently, for his confession.

“You and I are a thing now, Lake. We’re … together.” Tam sounds breathless, a little bit excited, a little bit frustrated, too. “I didn’t wait twenty-seven years to sleep with a girl and then kick her out because her friend broke her heart. I can see it in your face, so don’t lie to me. You’re upset. That’s why I asked: why are you apologizing to me? Honey, you’re heartbroken.”

Honey. Did he just call me honey? Did I like it? Oh yeah.

“You trusted me, and I …” I can’t seem to collect my thoughts. They’re all over the place. “Chloe knows about the curse. She could’ve killed us both.”

“Maybe, if this had happened in the beginning.” Tam slides his hands gently out from underneath mine, and then he takes his phone from his pocket. He taps out a message, and I hear a different phone buzz on the countertop. Tam picks it up for me and hands it over.

I lift it up to see that I missed a bunch of texts from a contact named Mean Spirit.

I love this sweater even more now.

I’m going to wear it at the press release, and only you and I will know that I almost set it on fire.

Correction: only you and I will know that we had a threesome with it.

There’s an adorable selfie of Tam that follows, and I squeeze my new phone against my chest.

Oops.

“Notes?” I squeak out, and he gives me such a cute, cheeky smile in response that my knees go a little weak.

“I stuck one to the bedroom room door before I left the house. I thought you were upset and needed a minute, and I knew my mom was making you nervous.” He snaps his fingers. “Oh, and I also left another note on the nightstand this morning.”

“What did I tell you about giving me space?” I whisper, and Tam wets his lips, angling his body toward me in such a way that I can’t help but get the message. He likes me. A lot. “Also, this morning?”

Tam takes his phone, navigates to whatever it is that he’s looking for, and then holds it out to me. I take it gingerly, but I don’t need any proof. His words are enough. If he says he was here, I believe him. Still, I watch the video. I watch Tam walk into his bedroom and pause. I watch him come up beside me and stare down at my sleeping face with a gentle expression on his own. He crawls into bed beside me, curls an arm over my waist, and falls asleep.

I drag the bar at the bottom of the video until I see Jacob come in to wake Tam up. He kisses me on the forehead, writes another note, and then leaves again.

Ah.

So … I look up suddenly.

“Did you clean the kitchen?” I ask, and Tam nods, tucking his hands into his pockets.

“I’d rather be alone and clean my own messes than have someone in my house on my days off.” He smiles at me, and the effect is instant and irreversible. I’m so into Tam Eyre right now. I almost check the curse mark on my wrist to see if it’s still there, but I don’t have to look to know that it is. But we’re close. We’re so close.

“Sorry, I … I was planning on cleaning the kitchen myself.”

“Lake, stop. I know that I made you work for my attention in the beginning, but we’re in a different place now.” Tam accepts his phone when I hand it to him, tucking it into his back pocket. He edges a glance in Joules’ direction, but my brother is long gone. “Tell me the truth: you’re not okay, are you?”

“I trusted her,” I whisper, so relieved that Tam is not only not angry at me, but also that he’s here with me as a confidante, somebody to talk to, to lean on, to rely on. “Tam, I never in a million years would’ve believed she’d be capable of something like that.”

He studies me with such sad resignation that I ache for him as well as myself. “Who hurt you, Sir Tom?” I’d asked, but now I see that it isn’t one person, but many people. Tam’s reactions to my advances weren’t simply because he was a grump, but because when you touch your hand to a stovetop, you get burnt. And if you keep touching, and you keep getting burned, of course you’re not going to believe it when somebody tells you it’s safe.

“I hate that this is happening to you,” he says gently, pressing his tongue against the inside of his cheek in thought. “I hate that you’re getting a glimpse of the world through my eyes. I liked it much better seeing it through yours.” Tam takes a step toward me, and I put my arms back around his waist, my cheek pressed against the softness of his sweater. He strokes my back, and I feel so soothed, so complete. It helps cool the poisonous ache that Chloe left in my heart. “Just think about it this way: you introduced me to, what, twenty-seven of your closest friends and family?” Tam chuckles, so I don’t correct him and say that there were thirty-one people at the barbeque, not including him and myself. “And only one apple was bad. Those are great odds. Better than most. I’ll admit: I’ve been waiting for something like this to happen all along.”

I nuzzle into his chest, and he lets out a deep, wanting sigh that has me thinking about other things. Now that we’ve introduced sex into our arrangement, it always seems to be hovering near the top of my priority list.

“Is that why you weren’t afraid to kiss me in public?” I ask, mesmerized by the feel of his hand tracing down my back. “You knew it’d all come out eventually?”

“I was hoping those videos wouldn’t go viral until after the planned press release, but yeah. I knew. I knew that as soon as word got out that I’d been spending time with a freckle-faced cutie with hair the color of sea glass, that people would realize all of those maybe-it’s-Tam-Eyre sightings were, in fact, definitely-Tam-Eyre sightings.”

“I can’t believe she would do that to me. What did she even gain by posting those videos in the first place?”

Tam sighs, scooting back a bit so that he can look down at me. I notice a drink carrier sitting on the little bistro table outside the window behind him. There are four bobas in it, and my mouth twitches.

“Sometimes, people do shitty things for no reason. Or hell, maybe she had a reason that made sense to her at the time. I don’t know. All I know is this: you are not the bad guy for trusting her. She is the bad guy for abusing your trust. And Lakelynn, your trust is valuable. I see that you don’t give it easily.” Tam leans in and this time, he kisses the unmistakable tear right off my cheek.

“Apparently, I gave it to all thirty-one people at the family barbeque.” I make myself smile, but another tear falls. And then another. Chloe really hurt me, even if I’m trying to be strong about it.

“Yes, and only one of those people thought to upload videos of us together. Just the one. You should be proud of your social circle, Lake. It’s something about you that I envy, something that I wish I had.” Tam kisses my cheeks again, but at this point, he’s just brushing his lips against salt because there’s too much of it.

“Lucky you then that we were matched, huh?” I say, teasing him. Tam doesn’t take it that way. He pinches his lips a little and nods, like he agrees with that statement.

“I am lucky. So fucking lucky.” He hesitates for a second. “Lake, we will never just end, okay? If we’re going our separate ways, I expect a long conversation and some critical thinking.”

I squeeze him a little harder, and he presses a kiss to the top of my head.

I’ve traded Joules out … for Tam.

It’s a little sad, but it feels okay. It feels right.

“I can’t believe Chloe betrayed me like that,” I whisper again, and Tam lets out a soft, sad sigh.

“Oh, damn, Kayak, you can’t do that to me. You’re breaking my heart.” He scoots me back a step so that he can look into my eyes. Also, Kayak? I want him to keep calling me that. Or Jet Ski. Or Yacht. Or whatever water-related joke he wants to make. “Let’s have some boba and talk about it, okay?”

I nod, and Tam leans in to press a sharp, hot kiss to my mouth.

Thank you, Tam Eyre, for being awesome.

Because nobody likes a third-act breakup.

I give the middle finger to the curse, and then I follow Tam outside to sit with our feet in the pool, bubble teas in our hands.

We don’t move from that spot for hours.