Chapter 41

CHAPTER FOURTY-ONE

KAYCEE

54 bobas left until they both die … (the same day)

This stupid son of a bitch. I’m in a rage and wearing my favorite high-heeled boots, a toxic combination that makes me feel like a superhero. The only person I bring with me in the elevator is Wrenlee who looks at me like something to be pitied.

“What?” I ask her as I lean against the wall in the elevator at the Ritz-Carlton. I am coming, Joules Frost. I hope you’re ready for the wrath that you’ve just unleashed. Because, like, how fucking dare he charge in here with his sister and steal my boyfriend right out from under me?

I can’t stop thinking about the photo that Joules sent to Tam, the one of us laughing together. What was it that Joules had sent right after it? A message that read something like, Are you sure she’s your girlfriend?

As soon as I get ahold of Joules, I’m going to verbally wreck him. I’d slap him if I wasn’t worried about my career.

“Are you even listening?” Wren asks me, but I didn’t hear her until just now. I turn toward her, having forgotten that I asked her a question at all. “I said: are you sure this is a good idea? I know I’m not here to give you advice, but I can’t help myself. I don’t think you should go in there. All you’re going to be left with at the end of this is pain.”

I just stare at her.

Nobody else around me is willing to speak their mind freely, so I guess I appreciate the advice.

I’m not going to heed it though.

“Thanks,” I tell Wren honestly, and then the elevator doors are opening and I’m half-running down the hallway. I haven’t been able to pin Joules down since I saw him the weekend we were supposed to go to the villa. Instead of going to see Tam, I called Joules.

I hung out with Joules Frost.

Tam was hanging out with Lakelynn Frost.

This is all absolutely insane.

I restrain myself, pausing outside the double doors to the penthouse and taking deep breaths. I sweep my hands down the front of my dress. It’s silver and flashy and fun. It’ll be all over social media by now. Hell, it was probably trending before I even finished walking from my hotel room to the car.

I knock gently enough that I hope Joules will answer without bothering to check the door. He’s that kind of arrogant, and a little sloppy, too. What use do I have for some nobody man from Arkansas?

And I’m right: Joules is that arrogant or that confident. He opens the door without looking, and then stands there, sweaty and shirtless and still.

I think he stops breathing.

I push at him before he can stop me, and he stumbles back out of surprise. I step into the room and lock the door before I turn over my shoulder to glare at him.

“What the actual fuck, Joules?” I ask before I lose my nerve. He must’ve been working out in here because he’s dripping sweat, and his muscles are edged and taut beneath his moist skin. The way he’s staring at me, from under heavy, drooping lids, I get the idea that we could realistically be having sex already.

I turn around and put my back to the door, and Joules scoffs, turning away from me and padding over to the kitchen like this is his penthouse suite and not Tam’s. Like Tam isn’t probably off somewhere with his little sister. Well, better luck to her than me. I dated the guy for a year, and he only kissed me if it was pre-decided in a press release.

“Want something to drink? There’s Scotch in here that’s worth more than my parents’ house—a gift from one of Tam’s biggest fans. Do I even want to know who that is? Some billionaire’s son set to inherit the world?”

I ignore the question and the joke.

“You basically implied to Tam that we were together.”

“So?” Joules takes a water bottle out of the fridge, unscrews it with ease, and then tips it to his lips. He sighs and swipes his hand over his mouth before continuing. Doesn’t matter. I couldn’t look away from his throat as he was swallowing to care that the room was dead silent. “I play dirty, Kaycee. I play hard for what I want, and I’ve never had any trouble getting it. Case in point. My sister’s in our hotel room with Tam right now, and you’re here with me.” He smirks as I stand there seething, hands clenched at my sides.

“You gave Tam the impression that you and I were already involved, and then you blocked me. You’re avoiding me. You won’t see me at all. What’s the point in that? You want me, so why lie about it?” I’m blatant with my wants, just as I’ve always been. It’s how I got here. You don’t climb to the top of the world by being nice or shy or polite.

Tam only plays around with that. He isn’t na?ve or kind-hearted either.

Joules takes his time finishing off his water bottle. He grabs another. Yep, he was definitely working out in here. I look around and see that the room’s been ravaged. Every drawer and cabinet askew, items everywhere. Joules blatantly raided Tam’s room, and he doesn’t give a single fuck about it.

That’s the energy I like.

I cross my arms and wait for Joules to come back out of the kitchen. He does, walking right up to stand in front of me. His hands come up like he might take me by the arms, but he doesn’t. He drops one by his side and uses his other hand to rake tense fingers through his hair.

“Let’s go to Chinatown and get dumplings. It’s easy walking distance from here. There’s security everywhere, roadblocks outside.”

I’m a little stunned by the offer. Can’t he feel this tension between us? I’m so angry with him, but I also want him, too, and he knows it.

So, what is this?

He wants to take me out?

“Joules, I’m not going to lie to you. I was hoping that you’d throw me down on the bed and fuck me.”

He laughs at that, letting his head fall back, his eyes close.

“On any normal night, that’s exactly what I would’ve done. But not tonight. I have something I need to tell you before I do that.” He drops his chin back down, eyes opening, and then stalks into the bathroom. I hear the sink running, the sound of scrubbing, and then Joules comes back out, brandishing his wrist. “I haven’t told anyone the truth yet, but I guess … I guess I’m going to die soon anyway, so fuck it. I want to show you who I really am, Kaycee. I’m going to let go completely.” Joules stretches his arm out, so that I can see the bright red mark on his wrist, the one shaped like a smudged heart. It’s an exact match to the one I saw on Lake’s wrist when I passed by in the hallway.

I’ve heard the story from Joules and Tam both by this point: a curse mark. That’s supposed to be a curse mark. Dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life, but Joules is a straight shooter, and I’m just confused why he’d lie about something like that.

It’s my biggest motivation for even trying to believe something that stupid or insane.

“What is this supposed to mean?” I ask him, because there’s a sudden wrenching in my stomach, a queasiness that speaks to future heartbreak if I keep charging down this path.

Wrenlee was right.

I’ve changed my entire fate by coming into this room, and I accept that.

Because I really, really like Joules Frost.

“I have less than two months to live, and you’re the only person in the world who knows that.” Joules drops his arm by his side. “Give me a minute to shower and get dressed.” He heads into the bathroom, closes the door behind him, and locks it.

He’s serious about this.

Now Joules thinks he’s cursed, too?

I think really, really hard about whether I care if he’s crazy or not. Somehow, I land on the side of not giving a shit. There’s something enigmatic and engaging about him. I meet new people all the time, constantly. The best of the best, really. The wealthiest, most popular, most beloved, most beautiful.

And yet none of them hold a candle to the charisma and energy of Joules Frost.

Fine.

Joules believes he’s cursed to die.

Let’s figure this shit out together.

Joules emerges from the bathroom with dark, wet hair feathered across his forehead. Blue eyes shadowed with restrained need. Hands tight by his sides. He flexes like he wants to touch me but doesn’t dare.

Not yet.

We exit the room, taking Wrenlee with us, hit the lobby, and leave through one of the hotel’s private exits. Joules opens the door to a wet San Francisco street with a sidewalk so steep that I get a little dizzy looking down the length of it.

“Here.” Joules takes my arm, and we walk slowly together down the hill. I’m cursing my boots with every step. “Please don’t tell my sister,” he says, and it’s the gentlest, most honest statement I have ever heard leave his mouth. He’s staring down at the sidewalk instead of at me, like he’s ashamed of the situation.

“I won’t tell her, but if you really believe this curse shit, is it right for you to lie to her about it?”

“If she finds out that I’ve been matched, too, then she’ll want to fight for my life instead of hers. She and Tam are this close; I can feel it. I don’t want to do anything to upset that balance. And if she can break her curse sooner rather than later, then good. Maybe I’ll have some time to …” Joules trails off with a beleaguered sigh, and I see suddenly what it is that he’s truly hiding.

Exhaustion and fear.

Whether I believe in this curse or not doesn’t matter. Joules truly believes he’s going to die, and his only wish right now is to save his sister’s life. I emotionally put myself in his position, and my eyes burn. I don’t let him know, blinking back the moisture as we continue down the hill.

Once we get to the bottom, Joules picks a restaurant at random, unzips his hoodie and tosses it over my head. He zips me up to the chin, so that I can barely see a thing from under the floppy fabric of his sweatshirt hood. Next thing I know, we’re seated in the back corner of a bustling restaurant with red and gold wallpaper.

I let Joules order us a pair of beers and some dim sum, and we sit in silence together, holding our drinks.

“I’m not saying I believe this curse thing,” I start, but Joules is already shaking his head.

“And this is why I won’t sleep with you.” He lifts his gaze up to mine, and I know for a fact that he means this. “I’m not going to be around for much longer, and I like you too much to screw with you, Kaycee. If that’s all I can do for you before I go, then so be it.”

“You won’t date me because you think you’re going to die?” I clarify, breath catching on that last word.

“I won’t date you for two reasons. One, because, yeah, I might die. Two, because if I want to live, I’ll have to get my Match to fall in love with me. I can’t seduce another woman if I’m dating you, so … that’s where we’re at.” He looks right at me. “And yeah, I wanted Tam to break up with you. That was my goal when I came here. I just didn’t expect to like you.” Joules leans back in the booth, arms crossed over his tight black T-shirt.

It has the same Frost Family Construction logo as the sweatshirt I stole from him. I might steal the one I’m wearing, too. It’s black with a skeleton on the back—the exact opposite of Kaycee Quinn’s bright, bubbly (but subversively sexy) style.

“You’re honestly a rude bastard, and probably a fuckboy, too, but I also like you.” I cross my own arms, and Joules’ smile slides into something sinful and decadent. I should not take a bite of that. He knows better than to pursue someone like me. I’m the sort of girl a guy’s friends warn him about. A heartbreaker.

I tried to be good to Tam, to go slow with him, give him space. Didn’t work. I’m going to do what I want to do right now. I won’t hold back.

“Enough to watch me die?” Joules asks curiously, eyes searching my face. He puts his palms down flat on the table and leans in toward me, mouth twisting into a crooked smile. “Or enough to watch me leave to seduce a woman that I don’t even like?” He laughs, and then shakes his head at me. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Who is she?” I ask, this awful green monster curling into a tight coil inside of me. I’m not Joules’ Match? If I were, he wouldn’t have run away from me like that. But the idea of this man having better chemistry with another woman than he does with me is insane. I hate it.

“A twenty-five-year-old married woman with three young children,” Joules says like he wants to throw up. My eyes widen as I drop my arms to my sides, digging my fingernails into my tights. I rip a hole in one side, but I don’t care.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I ask, and he shakes his head. Joules puts his face against his palm, braced on a single elbow on the tabletop.

“Religious, too. I saw her walking out of church. That’s when we got matched, when I drove by and glanced out the window of my truck. Fucking fantastic.”

I think about that long and hard. Say Joules and Lake were telling the truth … what a curse indeed. Matching one sibling to the world’s most popular artist? Matching another to a religious, married mother of three? Ouch.

“I’ve seen the curse destroy perfectly legitimate relationships. Good ones. Real ones. I know my Aunt Lisa still misses her ex-husband. I don’t know how the curse determines a person’s Match, but that woman is not my soulmate or destined future or whatever you want to call it. What were my choices, Kaycee? Break up a marriage or save my little sister’s life? Easy choice.”

“I wish I were your Match,” I admit, and Joules nods, rubbing at his face.

“Me, too, Miss KQ.”

I smile at the stupid nickname.

Joules toys with his beer, pausing while our food is delivered, and then lifting the bottle in my direction.

“I’d rather be your boyfriend than your friend, but what do you say, Kaycee? Friends again? It’s the best I can do for now.”

I exhale. I shouldn’t even consider being friends with this crazy person. I pick up my own drink, but I don’t toast him just yet.

“You’re the one deciding not to be my boyfriend. What if I told you that I want to try anyway? That we’ll deal with the curse shit together?”

Joules is already shaking his head. He draws his beer bottle back.

“No deal, because you don’t believe it, and if you don’t believe it, I won’t do that to you.”

“Joules,” I snap, because I’m getting frustrated here. “I do believe you.”

“You believe that I believe it,” Joules retorts, turning away from me to survey the restaurant and tip his beer back at the same time. “Not the same thing.”

“Fine. Okay. I’ll entertain the idea, but if you live past the end of the curse, I get to make fun of you whenever I want.”

Joules turns back to look at me, but I’m not sure that he’s convinced.

He looks like he wants to be convinced, but deeper than that, he looks afraid and like he wishes there were at least one person around that he could confide in.

I want to be that person for him; I want him to be that person for me.

“Let’s date, Joules. We’ll figure out what to do together, okay? For now, isn’t it better to have someone by your side that knows, than to go it alone?”

Joules groans and then finishes off the rest of his drink.

“I was too honest with you, wasn’t I?” he asks dryly, slanting his ice-and-fire gaze over to me. I pick up a dumpling and push it up against my lips, watching Joules’ expression as he takes the sight in. He wets his own lips, and I smile with mine closed as I chew. “Alright, fine. You’re a grown adult. If you hear what I’m saying, and you accept that I’ve warned you, let’s … date.” He pauses and looks up at me. “Better yet: let’s fuck.”

Joules reaches out for my wrist, yanking me from the table before we’ve even had a chance to eat. He tosses some cash onto the host stand as he passes by, and out the door we go.

He hefts me into his arms, and I make a sound of surprise as he carries me right back up that hill.

I laugh the entire way.