12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

S itting nestled between Noah’s legs as they rode Hope back to Haven House, Willa shrugged off his attempted kiss. After her complete obliteration of morals on the beach, he had adjusted their clothing and informed her that it was time to go without giving her a chance to explore his body.

“I’m still angry,” she snapped. The large hand flattened against her stomach glided up to cup a breast, and a sound between a groan and a gasp hissed through the night air. “You promised, Noah.”

“Don’t think I didn’t want it.” Teeth nipped at her ear, his playful nature becoming one of the most tantalizing things she had ever witnessed. “Don’t think I didn’t want to know what that razor-sharp tongue of yours could do.”

They were far enough from the house that the dense forest still obscured them from view, and Willa turned in the saddle to shamelessly pout.

His expression darkened. “Oh, now that’s not fair.”

Cupping the back of her head, he kissed her, promptly quelling the disappointment with a slow glide of his tongue. In seconds, he had her aching all over again .

She shoved him half-heartedly away. “You are a beast, Noah Anderson.”

“A beast?” He chuckled in the darkness. “Well, if anyone can tame a beast, it’s you.”

Tame him indeed. She had learned a few lessons on their ride, and wiggling her bottom, she caressed the painfully hard erection pressing into her back. Noah grunted and released a colorful string of explicit words.

“If you would have allowed me to get my hands,” she boldly reached behind her, pressing her palm to the hard ridges she had yet to taste, “or mouth on you, this wouldn’t be so painful.”

Noah pressed his lips to her neck, his teeth scraping the line of muscle there. “Stop.”

She didn’t stop, craving to hear that hitch in his deep voice again. “I think I understand how it works,” she whispered. “It wouldn’t take long with you in this state, and the woods are thick. No one would see us.”

“I need to get you home. It’s well past dark, and our time is up.” Air sawed roughly in and out of him, bringing him to an almost panting state. “Please stop, or I will do more than use your mouth.”

Intrigued, her fingers gripped as much of him as they could through the material of his trousers. She had no idea how large the male anatomy could grow, but Noah was much bigger than the glimpse she caught of Paul.

“Such as?”

His head snapped up. Eyes wild with only the barest hint of control in them, his breathing turned shallow as she continued to move her hand. “I will use your body. Right here on the side of the road, I will use you in ways you cannot imagine, and I don’t want to do that.” His hips thrust forward, and he shuddered. “I don’t want to have you like that the first time. I want you in a bed. Naked and with your legs spread wide when I fill you.”

Willa’s lips parted, her gaze holding his bravely. “Tell me more. ”

“I want you wanton and lost in your desire for me. As lost as I am whenever you are near.” He groaned, his eyes closing as he continued to rock against her palm. “Your cries, Willa. I will own your cries. I will own your screams. All of you will belong to me. Forever.”

Forever .

The word crossed his lips, and with it, a song rose on the wind. Coming in off the bayou far ahead, the sound had ice crystallizing in Willa’s veins, flowing with its cold truth directly to her heart. A heart that could never be his, no matter how much it yearned to.

This was wrong. It wasn’t fair to her, and it certainly wasn’t fair to lead Noah into believing she was free to do as she pleased when she was just as trapped as Cal.

Sitting straight in the saddle, she spoke softly as she watched the sway of moss hanging high on the tunnel of oaks leading to Haven House. “You’re right. Our time is up.”

The heavy stream of Noah’s breathing halted abruptly behind her. “Willa.”

“Yes?”

“Look at me.”

Tears stung, and she cursed herself. This was no one’s fault but her own. She had allowed him in and, by doing so, had entangled them both thoroughly enough that the impending separation was going to cause unforgettable pain. All for a moment of pleasure. All for a memory she would cherish for a lifetime.

“I need to get back.” Holding on to Hope’s mane, she kept facing forward. “My parents will begin to worry if I’m out too far past sunset. I’ve never done such a thing.”

“Willa.”

She didn’t need to turn to know her name was being uttered through clenched teeth, and when she ignored him again, Noah swung down off Hope’s back.

“We’re walking the rest of the way.”

“I would rather ride, thank you. ”

Noah’s large hand landed on her thigh and squeezed. “Get off the horse, Willa.”

Head high, she scrambled to maintain the small shred of dignity left in her and remained seated on the horse. “I’m feeling rather winded and would like to rid—eeek!” Wide-eyed, she tried to kick him away when he tickled her inner thigh. “Do not do that!”

Refusing to cease his torment of her leg, Noah bared his teeth as he ordered her yet again. “Then get off the damn horse.”

“Fine,” she huffed, swinging her leg over to dismount. This time around, she got off the horse with much more agility than she knew she possessed and stood before him with her hands on her hips. “Happy?”

Yanking her to him, he snarled a single word before capturing her mouth. “No.”

The kisses before this one were playful, exploratory even. Soft and lingering, they allowed her to learn as they went. He hadn’t pushed her out of feeling anything but comfort, permitting her to lead, which was probably why she lost her head.

But this kiss…This kiss was nothing like the others. It wasn’t playful, soft, or slow. It was greedy, a desperate claim that screamed his intentions.

And she couldn’t stop herself from responding in kind. This man was everything she had ever dreamed of. A fantasy come to life. Kind, caring, and able to let her fly as only he could, Noah held her trust, and Wilhelmina Fairweather never trusted anyone.

“You will not cut me out,” he growled as she clung to him for more. “You will not get lost in that extraordinary mind of yours. It overthinks everything, and while I usually marvel at the way it works, I’ll not allow it to push me away.”

It wasn’t as if she could stop her tears and let them fall. “Noah…”

“No.”

No .

And he thought she was the stubborn one. He uttered the word as if he could change their circumstances with his will alone .

Holding them pressed together, he rested his forehead on hers, and she didn’t try to pull away, too desperate for the intimacy.

“If you could have any future, what would it be?” he asked. “A husband? A home?”

Ah, so he meant to emotionally ruin her before the evening was over. How delightful.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“What you want is all that matters,” he said, determined to make her see things his way. “Now answer me. What kind of future? A life with Richards? A life here at Haven House? If you could choose anything, what would it be?”

Afraid she would become even more distraught if she spoke, Willa shook her head.

“Say it.” His nostrils flared at her refusal to speak. “Please.”

He was begging, and seeing him do so might be the end of her yet. “If I were free, I would not want those things,” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

When she didn’t continue, Noah brushed his lips across hers. “Tell me.”

Could she do it?

Could she say it out loud?

He might laugh.

But what if he didn’t?

Scrunching her face tight, she spoke the truth. “You.”

As if coming out of a nightmare, the tension on Noah’s face lessened. “ Me .”

Her mouth worked to form what she wanted to say, but even with her brain racing to articulate a reply, it didn’t matter. The truth all came tumbling out anyway. “I want you. I want to be with you. If I could have any future, I would have one with you. A life. A home. Children?” She took a shaky inhale as the gravity of what she was confessing struck her fully. “And I want what happened on the beach to happen every day. ”

“Every day?” Her wicked man returned with his carefree smirk at the ready. “My, my, I have my work cut out for me.”

“And I want more.” If she were going to burn in eternal damnation, she might as well arrive at the pits of hell good and well on fire from embarrassment. “I want to do to you what Katie was doing to Paul. I want to be in control yet completely under your power.”

Noah’s head lowered, his lips and tongue tracing the column of her neck. “Continue,” he ordered. “Don’t stop now.”

“I want you in my mouth and between my legs,” she went on. Her fingers tangled in his hair, holding him close when the scrape of his canine met her flesh. “I want you to fill me and give me babies. I want to be your wife, Noah Anderson. The only woman you love.”

He backed her up, hiding them in the forest directly off the drive. “I do believe you just proposed to me, Ms. Fairweather.” Her back landed against a tree with a thud, and Noah stared down at her in a wholly possessive way. “And if that is the case, I accept.”

Willa’s knees promptly buckled. He could not mean it. He could not possibly mean to whisk her away. She didn’t deserve it. Not when her sister would be crushed by Paul’s betrayal.

“Lucy.”

“I know she’ll be upset about Paul, but I have an idea. She’s been writing to Mr. Richards on your behalf?”

“Yes?”

“And after what I’ve witnessed and from what you’ve told me, I assume they’ve become friends?”

“Noah…”

“And your family wants the land John Richards is willing to provide should he receive a wife.”

He looked like a boy. This utterly masculine man looked as giddy as a child who had concocted the perfect plan for creating mischief. “I know where you’re going with this, but Lucy does honestly love Paul. She won’t want another man. Not even one she considers a friend. ”

Leaning in, Noah nipped at her bottom lip. “Your sister is kind and decent. A genuinely good person.”

“There is no need to sell me on the merits of my sister.” She yanked him closer by his vest, both smiling like a pair of co-conspirators. “I know how wonderful she is.”

“Then let us show John Richards how wonderful she is.”

Utterly uninhibited, she kissed him for being a genius. “If I recall, it was you who suggested that she write him in the first place since I was always so busy with my doctor visits.”

“Amazing how that worked out.”

Smacking his chest, she pretended to be shocked, but ended up laughing her head off. “Amazing, indeed.”

Noah turned serious, observing her in the moonlight. “I want you like this always.”

“Like what?”

“Happy.” He raised his hand hesitantly, toying with the ends of her chestnut strands. “Can I have you like this, Willa? Can I have you like this forever? With your hair down, your face flushed, and your lips swollen from my kisses?”

He had her standing on that mountaintop again. The very same one he had led her to during The Gathering. “Yes.”

“By Christmas.”

The massive smile on her face flattened into a line of disbelief. “What?”

“I want you to be my wife before Christmas.”

“Christmas is in three weeks!” Her heart pounded in her chest, the excitement over what he was saying made her woozy. “We cannot convince Mr. Richards to marry Lucy and plan to run away together before Christmas.”

Running away together? It sounded so romantic. However, when dealing with her father, the idea was less like what she would find in one of her romances and more like a gothic novel coming to life .

“Why would we have to leave?” He was genuinely confused, and it broke her heart. “Don’t you want to be married with your family in attendance?”

“My father will never approve.” If he were truly willing to take her on, it was best if he understood the way of things. “Of you, I mean. Not when you can give him nothing in return. He would rather I rot away in that house than give up a possession for free.”

“Fine. Let him win. But then again, I can’t think of a better story to tell our children one day. Who wouldn’t want to hear of how their father was so desperate for their mother that he stole her away in the night?” Seizing her by the hips with two hands, he massaged the muscles there. “I want us to go up north. I think your lungs will do much better in cooler weather.”

“But what if I don’t?” She chewed on her bottom lip, thinking the whole thing through. “What if I’m worse?”

“Then we’ll go to a drier one and continue moving until we find a climate that works for you,” he replied as if he had already planned it. “The tea leaves I mentioned have arrived and are in my pocket. We can try them during your next attack and keep them on hand as we travel.”

He had yet to witness her in the throes of a breathing spell. Not that she minded, but she was afraid Noah would think she wasn’t worth the hassle once he did.

“I can’t ask you to move all over the place.”

The hands on her hips shifted to her rear and squeezed. “You can ask anything of me, and I’ll give it to you.”

“Oh, really?” His erection rubbed against her belly, and she swayed her hips. “Can I start by asking for this? Tonight?”

The blasted man took a step to the side. “Not tonight.”

“Tomorrow night?” She hoped she didn’t sound too eager, but patience was not one of her virtues. “Please?”

He turned serious. “Do you think you can sneak out tomorrow night? ”

She nodded, having done it a few times as a child. It had been during those never-ending years when her family had been so sure she would drop dead if she stepped outside, and the only way to receive fresh air was to sneak off in the middle of the night. “As long as the staff and Bonnie haven’t changed their nighttime routine, I should be in the clear just after midnight.”

“Then I will come for you at midnight.” Taking her hand, he led them back to Hope waiting on the lane. “Watch for my signal from the forest.”